Lustful Gaze (London Loves #6) (13 page)

It was inconceivable to Edward that only a week ago he’d been scratching out a living by selling mouth-fucks to needy men. But now… here he was in Chelsea, heading towards Scott’s art gallery, about to ask his dream man out for a drink. How had he got so lucky? He’d been taken in by two of the kindest and most generous men he’d ever known. And now he was falling in love with Harry. Surely his good fortune was about to run out. But maybe it was worth a shot...

The sun was shining peacefully in Chelsea today, and the cooling air-con hit him like a chilly curtain as he wandered into the art gallery. The sound of hysterical laughter seized his attention and he saw that – well away from the exhibition – Scott and Harry had been doing some painting, and were now trying to smear each other’s faces with their paint-covered hands. Scott smeared yellow paint into Harry’s cheek and he shrieked. They both giggled.

Edward stood there awkwardly watching, wishing he could join in the frivolity –
and
touch his dream man like Scott was.

“Mind my hair!” Harry shouted.

Scott laughed. “Oo, sorry, Harry Hairspray!”

They both laughed hard at this. Then Scott glanced up and noticed Edward loitering by the door.

He tried to compose himself. “Hi, Edward!”

Harry spun to face Edward and grinned shyly. He looked adorable with yellow paint smeared over his face – it was as if he’d been tarnished; sullied by Scott. It was tantalisingly subversive. Edward’s lust rushed into his pants and he shifted his weight, trying to hide his arousal.

Scott drifted over to greet Edward, hugging him loosely and making him feel welcome. Harry slipped behind the counter to grab some kitchen roll, which he moistened under the tap, then rubbed against his face, wiping off the splodge of yellow.

“I got the all-clear at the clinic,” Edward said.

“Paul told me!” Scott said. “It’s brilliant!”

“News travels fast, huh?” Edward said.

“Paul tells me most things.”

“Really?” Edward glanced at Harry. He lowered his voice. “Even things I’ve asked him not to tell anyone?”

“I shouldn’t think so – but then I wouldn’t know, would I?”

“True.” Edward craned around Scott and gazed at the man who’d become his obsession. “Um, Harry can I talk to you, please?”

Harry smiled casually and continued to wipe his face. “Sure.”

“Er… Would you like to go for a walk… um, alone?”

Harry grinned. “I’d love to. Is that okay, Scott?”

“Course. Why don’t you take a couple of hours? There’s not much going on around here. I’ll clear up the paint and stuff.”

“Thank you, Scott.”

Edward waited nervously – feeling his heart twist like a meat-grinder – as Harry finished wiping his cheek clean. Then he grabbed his wallet, sunglasses, and phone.

Edward opened the door for him then glanced back at Scott. Scott threw him a thumbs-up and a wink. Edward’s knees filled with lead and his insides looped with terror – what the fuck was he doing!

He felt as if he was in a movie, and the journey to Hampstead Heath was like a passage-of-time scene. First they were walking down the street, chatting casually about the clinic. Edward forced himself to be brave and subtly linked his fingers through Harry’s – Harry glanced at him; they smiled. On the crowded underground train, Edward sat in the only vacant seat. He was mesmerised by Harry, who was leaning against the train wall, gazing into space behind his shades – making him look super-cool. Edward couldn’t take his eyes off this gorgeous young man – he was smitten. Edward noticed that there was a young woman checking Harry out, too, and his chest swelled with pride; he’s with me, sister!

The train juddered to a halt, and the guy next to Edward stood up to leave, so Harry sat down next to him. Pretending to stretch, Edward reached out and possessively draped his arm behind Harry’s seat, avoiding the discarded newspapers strewn across the air vent. Edward leaned his face towards Harry’s ear and whispered, “Don’t look, but that girl opposite can’t take her eyes off you.”

Harry glanced at the girl. Edward looked over, too. She grinned – hopefully getting the message that these two were more than just friends. The train jolted and Edward’s arm accidentally slipped off the air vent and around Harry’s shoulders.

They smiled at each other. Edward lost himself in Harry’s eyes for a while, as the train rumbled off. They chatted some more, about last night, about Brighton, and about the play-fight he’d just been having with Scott at the gallery. As he realised that the train had stopped again, Edward absent-mindedly dragged his gaze away from Harry and glanced at the platform outside. A bolt of realisation jabbed him and he jumped to his feet, grabbing Harry’s hand. “Oh shit, this is Hampstead!”

They ran giggling from the train as the doors swept shut behind them, then they made their way to the exit, full of flashing adrenaline. At the main entrance gate to the Heath, Edward spotted a homeless man sitting slumped against a wall. He looked hungry and tired. Edward dug into the pocket of his jeans and dropped a couple of pound coins into the man’s hat. He mumbled a thank you.

They strolled in the sunshine across the grass. Harry frowned. “Won’t he probably spend it on drugs?”

Edward shrugged. “Probably, but so what? He’s hungry – his life has no meaning. Do you expect him to sit there and meditate on his empty stomach?”

Harry nodded. “I never thought of it like that. I was told ‘do not give money to homeless people in UK because they spend it on drink and drugs’. I never considered that it might actually be okay for them to do that.”

Edward draped his arm around Harry’s shoulders and squeezed him tight. “It’s whatever gets us through our lives, right?”

****

They sat on the dry grass by the bathing ponds – so close to each other that their shoulders touched. Edward had been here a few times with clients who wanted to be seen with a twink such as him. The scenery was lush, and the men’s bathing pond was of lake-like proportions. The blue sky and green trees surrounding the water made it look like the sort of place you’d go with your family for a tranquil stroll, but actually, this was a major gay cruising ground. Men came here to top-up their tans, parade in their swimwear, and hook-up for sex. The surrounding woodlands were the perfect place for some al-fresco fucking, and Edward had participated in oral, anal, and group sex – all at the expense of his lustful clients. In fact – he realised now – he’d never been here unpaid before; it was quite liberating.

There weren’t many other guys around at the moment, but at the weekends and on balmy summer’s evenings, this place sizzled with sexual tension and homoerotic action. Edward loved the tranquility here – it was like an oasis of calm in the centre of the bustling city; a place to sit and enjoy the magic of nature all around. Today, though, the magic sparkled
between
Harry and Edward, like the glistening sunshine off the water in front of them. It was a perfect day. The sky looked full of potential, and the white fluffy clouds swept across it, hypnotically.

Out of the corner of his eye, Edward sensed that Harry was staring at him, which made him feel uncomfortable. He eased his pouch of tobacco from the pocket of his jeans and started to roll a joint.

Harry leaned back on his hands. “I’ve never been here before. It’s stunning.”

“You never been to Hampstead Heath before?”

“Nope.”

“Where do you live?”

“Maida Vale.”

“You live in Maida Vale and you’ve never been to Hampstead Heath before!”

“No!” Harry chuckled. “You make me laugh, Edward. I like your energy.”

Edward lost himself in Harry’s beautiful eyes. “Thanks.”

Harry reached out and ran a finger over Edward’s cheek, sending tingles into his bones. “Is this scar from when the guys beat you up the other day?”

Edward licked the cigarette paper to stick the joint together. “Nah, it’s from a different time.”

“It happened a lot – you got beat up a lot?”

“Jesus, Harry. I worked on the streets. Being mugged and beaten up was normal. Those fucking junkies were always stealing my earnings. Thank god I never got raped. A friend of mine – god, these guys followed him down an alleyway once and… sorry, I’m sure you don’t wanna hear this.”

Edward threw his attention back to his joint. The truth was, he didn’t want to talk about it.

Harry stared at him. “How many guys have you slept with, Edward?”

“God, I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

“No. If you mean ‘anal’ then two. Maybe three. If you’re asking how many cocks I’ve sucked, I honestly lost count months ago. It’s not like I was scoring notches on my bedpost. I didn’t even
have
a bedpost. I had an old fucking mattress on the concrete floor.”

“Okay. Sorry to ask.”

Harry reached across and held Edward’s hand, then kissed him on the side of the cheek.

Edward smiled into his eyes. “Thank you. I needed that.”

“Sure – I needed it, too… Do you… er… smoke pot all the time?”

“Nah, only when I’m nervous.”

“You’re nervous now?”

“Terrified.”

Edward flicked his thumb over the flint of his Zippo and lit the end of his joint. He inhaled the warm soothing smoke, causing his tense muscles to relax in the sunshine.

“Want some?” he asked.

Harry smirked and shook his head. “No.”

“You don’t have to smoke it, look. Open your mouth.”

Harry’s jaw dropped down, making him look incredibly hot. His sunglasses obscured his eyes, and he had an air of mysterious sexuality about him. Edward tried to stop his hands from shaking as he took a drag on the joint, then he leaned forward and seductively blew the smoke into Harry’s waiting mouth. Edward hoped he looked sexy as he pouted and dropped his head back to aim the smoke directly between Harry’s lips. It felt unbelievably intimate.

Harry closed his mouth, paused for a second, then coughed as the smoke spewed out of his nostrils. He laughed, allowing the drug to relax him.

“Like it?” Edward asked.

Harry shrugged. “It’s okay. A bit like waking up from a snooze.”

“Yeah, it is.”

Edward turned his face up to the sky and allowed the sun to warm his skin. They were sitting in the direct sunshine and it felt perfect to be here with Harry, relishing this time together – just them and nothing else in the entire universe. He glanced at Harry and saw that he was also soaking up the sun like a lizard recharging its batteries. 

Edward reached out and ran his fingers over Harry’s forehead – any excuse to touch him. “You’re sweating.”

“Yeah, it’s too much hot.”

He gestured towards the bathing pond. “Wanna take a dip?”

Harry laughed. “No!”

Edward shot to his feet and unbuttoned his shirt. “Come on. Let’s go in!”

“You’re crazy, Edward.”

Edward offered his hands to help Harry stand up. Harry hesitated, then took them, so Edward heaved him to his feet. They laughed nervously together. Edward let go of Harry’s hands and reached out to undo his shirt buttons for him, trying not to seem too frantic about getting him undressed. Harry didn’t try to stop him, so he stripped Harry’s shirt off his shoulders.

Harry smiled coyly, looking like a model with his shirt hanging off. Edward couldn’t resist – he leaned in and kissed him – a quick peck on the lips. This wonderful connection with the man of his dreams sent spectacular tingles through Edward’s body. They grinned at each other and Edward felt as if they were on the cusp of something fabulous. Edward couldn’t wait to get in the water with him, so he severed eye contact, unzipped his trousers, and kicked them off.

He glanced up to see that Harry was also undoing his own trousers. Edward noticed that he had an Indian scarf wrapped around his waist in place of a belt. It was made of dark blue chiffon with silver studs on the ends. Harry pulled it out of the belt loops with a flourish, like a stripper.

Edward forced himself to get a grip. “Cool scarf.”

“Thanks. Mummy-ji always says to the girls you should have a dupatta handy, just in case.”

“What’s a dupatta?”

“A scarf. They use it to cover themselves – their modesty, you know.”

Edward frowned – he had no idea what Harry was talking about, but it sounded stupid. He didn’t want them to argue, so he changed the subject. “You’ve got sisters?”

“Yep. And one brother. I’m the eldest.”

“Me too. I’ve got a brother and sister. They’re nice kids.”

“It’s a pressure being the eldest son, though, huh?”

“Er… not really.”

“Oh. Must just be my family, then. Here, you can have this if you like it.”

Harry reached out and tied the scarf around Edward’s hips as if he was claiming him. He knotted it at one side, and Edward felt quite glamorous wearing this with nothing but his boxers. It was an honour to be given the scarf – he wasn’t sure why; it probably wasn’t very expensive. He lifted the end and ran the silky chiffon through his fingers. He’d never really owned anything so impractical – maybe that was it.