Maid to Be Mine: A Regency Cinderella Story (13 page)

“
My lord...” Cynthia closed her book and rose from the table. “Would you like me to excuse myself?”

“
No. Not at all. Please, sit.”

Cynthia sunk back down to the chair and folded her hands on the table. As she stared into the candle's flame, her mind conjured all sorts of scandalous images.
Kisses in the moonlight... caresses in the garden...

“
Every time I see you, you are always reading” Lord Charmington noted. “A maid
and
a bluestocking. Such a curious combination!”

“
It isn't so strange, is it?”

“
You are an original, but there's nothing wrong with that!” Lord Charmington sat across from her and displayed a heart-melting smile. “If I was to write you a poem one day, it's good to know you could enjoy it.”

“
A p-poem, my lord?!” Cynthia exclaimed. “Why would you write me a poem?”

“
Why does any man write poetry for a lady?” He waited a few seconds, but when she didn't respond, he finished, “because he is captivated by her!”

“
You're... captivated... by me?” Cynthia swallowed hard, ashamed by her lack of eloquence. Ever since their first encounter, she had been hoping she would run into him again. Now that she was in his presence, her thoughts were muddled. She wanted to sound intelligent and charming, not like a half-wit.

“
I am,” he admitted. “Forgive me for being so forward, but I still believe you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Every other creature on earth pales in comparison to you.”

“
I'm not that pretty,” she objected. “In fact, I haven't had a restful sleep in ages! I must look a fright!”

“
If this is you looking frightful, I can only imagine how you might look when you're at your best!”

Cynthia pulled her book into her lap and started fidgeting with its pages. Every time she glanced in his direction, she felt her heart flutter. To make matters worse, her mind was full of salacious thoughts about him. She just wanted the thoughts to stop!

“
I can only imagine what it would be like to hold you in my arms for the first time...” Lord Charmington went on. When he saw the worried look on her face, he added, “I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't say such things.”

“
No. It's...” Cynthia took a moment to gnaw on her lower lip, which she often did when she was nervous. “It's quite alright.”

“
Quite alright,” he repeated with a chuckle. “Really, though, I should learn to mind my tongue. You deserve more respect.”

“
If you want to flatter me, I don't mind.”

“
It isn't flattery. I'm being
very
honest. Your face is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. It's an angel's face. I wish I could paint it, to preserve it for all time.”

“
You paint, my lord?”

“
I do. I wouldn't say I'm a master, but I've dabbled a bit. I am afraid my brushstrokes could never do you justice.”

Cynthia sighed so deeply, her breath made the candle's flame wobble. It wasn't fair! Cynthia knew she was conversing with the love of her life, but he would never have her. She would never be worthy of him, and he would never know she was an earl's daughter.

But what if he
did
know? What if she told him? As her mind toyed with the possibility, Lord Charmington devoured her with his eyes.

“
May I paint you?” he asked. “If I had a subject such as you, I am sure I would be more inspired than ever.”

“
I...”

“
I'll pay you, if you would like.”

Being an artist's model wasn't exactly a respectable profession, but she had nothing to lose. Her mind was playing out an assortment of scenarios.
He falls in love with me, I tell him my identity, I will be free from this life...

But what if a dalliance was all he was after? What if the fact that she was a maid was the only thing that drew him to her? As much as she wanted to trust Lord Charmington, she needed to be cautious. She did not want to pin too much hope on him, only to be let down.

“
I require no payment, my lord,” Cynthia said. “I would happily sit for you.”

All of a sudden, James reached across the table and seized her hand. With his thumb, he caressed her knuckles and stroked her fingers. “Do you remember the first time we met?” he whispered.

“
Of course.”
I've been replaying it in my mind ever since that day,
her thoughts finished.

“
It is inexplicable, how much I am drawn to you. Now that I know you exist, I don't think my life will ever be the same. You could be my world, Cynthia. My
whole
world.”

“
That's certainly... a lot to say.” Cynthia looked down at her hand, which he continued to hold. The simple contact between their hands had accelerated her heartbeat beyond her control.

“
How do you feel about me?” James asked. “Have you given me any thought?”

“
I... don't quite know what to make of you.” She gently tugged her hand away from him. “I don't know if I should enjoy the attention you've paid me, or if I should be guarded.”

“
Guarded? Why do you say that? My intentions are nothing but honorable...”

“
But I am a maid,” she reminded him. “Your intentions couldn't possibly be as honorable as I wish they were.”

Lord Charmington looked wounded, but she certainly had a point. It wasn't as if a servant could be his bride. His mother would be up in arms—he would never hear the end of it! So what
were
his intentions, he wondered? To make her his mistress? If that was the case, his intentions certainly
weren't
honorable, and Cynthia deserved better than that.

At the moment, he just wanted to remain in her presence, to bask in the glory of her beauty. The constant pain of longing almost made him wish they had never crossed paths.

Cynthia did not know what to make of his silence, so she rose from her chair. “Well, my lord... I should really get back to my room. I have an early start tomorrow, so--”

James took her arm and pulled her toward him. “When can I see you again?”

Cynthia raised her chin. “I'm not sure we should ever--”

“
Please
,” he beseeched her. “You already said I could paint you! You couldn't possibly take that away from me, now that I am anticipating it so much!”

“
I don't... think...” Cynthia took a deep breath before continuing. As much as she wanted him, she would not endanger her honor, and she could not risk her position. “I do not think it is such a good idea after all, my lord.”

“
Please
,” he repeated. “The thought of seeing you again is my only solace. I
need
to see you again.”

“
I...” As she stared into his beautiful blue eyes, she could feel her reservations melting. How could any woman deprive him of anything when faced with those eyes? “I suppose... it would not be so terrible.”

Her flippancy made him chuckle. Lord Charmington released her arm and leaned back in his chair, pleased. “When should I come?”

“
Well...” Cynthia turned to the window, where she saw flurries flickering down the pane. “I do not think the snow will keep you here another night, my lord. You will have to return some other time, but.... they cannot know you're here to paint me, or my job will be lost. You'll have to sneak into the house through the servants' entrance.”

“
Sneak?” His eyebrows were raised mischievously. “Good. I enjoy sneaking. It can be quite a thrill.”

“
Why don't you return in a few days' time?”

“
A few days?!” he whimpered. “A few as in... three or four?! How am I supposed to endure so many days without you?!”

“
I am sure you'll be just fine. Now...” She retrieved the candle from the table and gripped it in her hand, clutching it with all her might. She did not want to be parted from him any more than he wanted to be parted from her. The days without him would be agonizing. “I should really go.”

“
Will you think of me?”

“
Occasionally,” Cynthia said with a smirk, even though the honest answer would have been
constantly.
“Good evening, my lord.”

“
Good evening, my angel.” As he watched her head for the door, he said, “You know, my life will stop as soon as you leave this room...”

Cynthia paused in the doorway. Speaking over her shoulder, she asked,“And when will it start?”

He gave her the answer she needed to hear.

“
The next time I see you, my life will start again.”

Chapter Fourteen

When the lords and ladies of Montforth Hall gathered for breakfast the next morning, Georgiana made no secret of her affection for Lord Charmington. While she did not directly state her feelings, they were written all over her face. Throughout the entire meal, she was staring at him like a lovesick mooncalf.

Unfortunately for Georgiana, he never spared her a glance. He conversed with Edith, prodded his food, and generally ignored her.
He is pretending!
Georgiana tried to convince herself.
He does not want to make his affections too obvious, but he definitely cares for me.

“
Lord Montforth.” It was James who spoke, but Roland did not acknowledge him. Roland's sullen eyes were downcast and his head was between his shoulders, which made his double chin more prominent than ever.

“
Lord Montforth,” James repeated. “Are you unwell?”

Roland finally scraped his gaze from the floor. “What? Oh... you'll have to pardon me. I am still unaccustomed to being called by that name. Please, my lord, call me Roland. Or Rolly, if it tickles your fancy.”

“
Well,
Roland
...” Lord Charmington cleared his throat before continuing, “I was just thinking you looked glum. Am I wrong to think there is a storm cloud over your head?”

“
It is a good thing there isn't a storm cloud over his head, or he would be quite wet!” Georgiana said with a giggle. Her failed attempt at humor was met with silence.

A few seconds later, Rolly moaned, “She won't marry me.”

Lord Charmington raised an eyebrow. “Pardon?”

“
She won't marry me!” Rolly repeated in anguish. “That stupid chit won't marry me!” He felt Jemima kick him under the table, so he added, “That is to say, uh... pay no attention to my mindless ramblings, Lord Charmington. Oftentimes I will erupt in an unbridled stream of consciousness. It makes no more sense to me than it does to you.”

“
So, my lord!” Jemima spoke up, swiftly changing the subject. “Was the guest room to your liking? How did you sleep?”

James looked down at his arm, on which there were three red bumps. The bugs had eaten him alive. “Well enough, my lady.”

“
I slept extraordinarily well!” Georgiana bragged. “The key to a good sleep is to clear your mind of all thoughts. Was there something on your mind, my lord?”

“
There was.”

“
And what might that be?” Georgiana pressed.
Your painstaking feelings for me, perhaps?

“
I... cannot say.”

As she sliced her ham, a grin snaked across Georgiana's lips. His inability to express himself was all the confirmation she needed. In her mind, she was certain Lord Charmington was smitten with her.

* * *

Cynthia knew he was coming well before he arrived. His thunderous footsteps were the first indication. Then she heard his voice squawking, “TESS, I NEED TO TELL YOU SOMETHING!”

Cynthia tried to grab a blanket, but she was too late. She was standing in the middle of the room when Robert threw open the door.