Maid to Crave (Man Maid #2) (12 page)

He pressed himself as close to her as he could. The scent of his aftershave and the feel of his hands on her bottom and his chest pinning her to the wall was an assault on her senses. His eyes changed from a look of regret and guilt to liquid pools of heat as he stared her down while grinding her against the wall. His gaze finally left hers only to stare at her mouth before returning to her eyes to tell her what he was thinking.

The atmosphere between them shifted when his breathing changed. She could feel him harden where his body bumped against her own. As much as she might regret not taking advantage of this heat, she would regret it even more if she allowed herself to be played again…especially by Seth
.
Her heart preferred the safety of his friendship, even above his muscular arms and shoulders and the rhythm of his thrusts. It would cut her for him to leave here with someone else, for him to
be
with someone else, but she would survive it. Enjoying his body after two weeks of an unexpected friendship she hadn’t known she needed, just for him to walk away afterwards, would kill her.

He must have seen the denial in her face because he sighed in frustration just before she leaned in and said, “Put me down, Seth. You do not have to do
this
to get money from me.”

A look of pain crossed his face. “I can’t take it back, Tori. I said it okay? I said those things about you and I am sorry for it, but I can’t take it back. Maybe…I never really meant those things in the first place.
Maybe
I like the way you look after all,
including
your breasts.
Maybe
I like the way you feel in my arms. You are right, I don’t
have
to do this…but maybe I
want
to be in between your legs right now.”

He was serious! She could see it on his face, plain as day. He shifted her in his arms to better align their bodies and stepped back from the wall while her back remained propped against it. The gap between them meant their only connection, other than her legs around his waist and his hands holding her hips, was…
Oh, God!

If bumping against her before was inappropriate, now it bordered on voyeurism for those in the audience cheering them on. Before she could pay attention to anyone other than him, he captured her gaze with his own and held it for a moment before looking down at where their bodies joined. His expression was so intent that when he looked back at her, she feared he had forgotten where they were. Launching herself off the wall, she wrapped her arms around his thick neck and then put her mouth against his ear.

“No, Seth. Not like this… I don’t want this,” she whispered.

He stopped, released her legs and allowed her body to slide down his own. Once her feet were back on the floor, he stepped away. The look of pain on his face stole her breath. Just as she was going to say something to him, he turned away and began dancing with two other women. She’d known it would hurt, but she hadn’t expected it to draw
blood
. Her chest ached with the effort to draw a breath and swallow the pain.

After a moment or two, she finally turned to where Kara sat with her mouth hanging open. “We need to leave. It’s late and I need to pick up Zach.”

She heard Kara ask who exactly was watching Zach since Seth was here dancing, but Tori was already making her way through the crowd of women so providing an answer was impossible. It took all of her willpower to continue on to her car instead of turning around and going back inside to drag Seth away from the women now pawing him. It wasn’t jealousy, but rather like abandoning him, leaving him behind to fend for himself.

Seth was right. He probably did need the money, but she hated that he had to
perform
to get it. Yes, he was absolutely stunning so the gig suited him well. What those women at the club didn’t know was that he was more than just a hot guy to fantasize about. He was creative, fun, hardworking and generous to a fault.

The ride to his apartment to pick up Zach was a quiet affair because, for once in her life, Kara remained silent. Parking in front of his building, Tori assured Kara that she would be right back and was out of the car before hearing Kara’s response.

Ian opened the door to her knock. Seeing his powerful build standing in the doorway of the apartment in nothing but a long pair of shorts snapped her out of her sulking. It was late, really late, and in her emotional state she’d just shown up and started pounding on the door like a crazy woman.

Oblivious to the size difference between them and the fact that she was basically eye level to his navel, Ian cringed back from her. “Don’t hit me. I would have told you about Pole, if you’d asked. He and Caleb are the only liars and guilty ones up in here.”

“Pole?” she asked. Then deciding she didn’t want to know asked, “Where is Zach?”

“He fell asleep on the couch so I put him in Seth’s room,” Ian supplied, still curved in on himself as though he expected her to punch him at any moment.

“Will you stop?” she asked. “I am not going to hit you. I just need to get Zach and I will be out of your hair.”

He relaxed and then led her into the living room where she found Caleb looking at her nervously. His face spoke of his guilt. Seth must have called and warned them. She wasn’t mad at any of them, it wasn’t like she and Seth were dating and he’d been caught with another woman. The whole situation just made her feel bad. He was working night and day to take care of his brother while the women he danced for only saw a handsome face, broad shoulders, and a nice ass.

Those women didn’t see a man willing to cover for her in front of her sister to save her the embarrassment. The same sister who was content to only see him as Seth the exotic dancer, not Seth the man willing to decorate Tori’s house because she’d asked him. The two men who stood before her now with guilty expressions knew Seth, the good friend…the man she’d thought she knew prior to tonight. Why hadn’t he told her what his other job was?

“Now you see why I feel like I won’t ever be able to repay him,” Caleb said. “I’m injured, Tori, not stupid. I know he’s been paying my bills while I’ve been recovering. Whenever I ask, he tells me not to worry about it. To just focus on getting better, but I’m pretty sure he wiped out his entire savings account, money he was going to use for a down payment on a house, to pay
my
bills.”

Knowing what she knew of Caleb’s hospital stay, whatever Seth had paid hadn’t been nearly enough. She understood how Caleb felt. She wanted to help, too, but wasn’t sure how. Kayla had told Tori that she was already paying Seth more for working part-time than Kayla had paid Ronnie. The most painful part for Tori was that Seth didn’t consider her a good enough friend to confide in, at least not about the parts of his life where he danced—mostly
naked—
for other women.

“Look, this is a lot for me to handle in one night…and my sister is waiting in the car. I need to get Zach home, but mostly I just need a minute to think,” she said.

“I’ll carry the little guy down for you,” Ian offered and left the room to go and get Zach.

“Seth likes working for you and he really likes Zach. He is a good man. Don’t let what he does for living sway your opinion of him,” Caleb said.

By the time she got Zach home and in his own bed, she was exhausted, physically and mentally. Kara had again been quiet during the ride home and had gone straight to bed, which was unusual. Whatever it was that prevented Tori’s half-sister from taking this opportunity to degrade her, she was thankful for it as she crawled into her bed. Kara would never voluntarily work a job, especially as a stripper, to help Tori out in any way, shape or form. Seth might be broke from all Caleb’s medical bills, but both of the brothers were wealthy in ways they didn’t even realize.

As tired as she was, she lay awake until sometime after one in the morning. It was humid outside, which made it even harder to fall asleep since her body was still on fire from Seth’s touch and the look in his eyes as he’d danced against her. He probably did those things to hundreds of women, many of whom he probably slept with after the fact, but she refused to be one of many where he was concerned.

She could smell his cologne even now.…

“Tori…” his voice whispered. The dreams about him were becoming more real with each passing night. “Tori, I need you to wake up. I need to know that you don’t hate me for tonight.”

She jerked upright and pulled her blankets up around her shoulders. He was standing in the doorway of her room…with his clothes on.

“How did you get in here?” she whispered back.

“You gave me a key. You said I could use it whenever I needed,” he whispered and then leaned his head against the doorframe. “I guess that was before tonight. I’ve spent the past two weeks over here, every day but Sundays. This place feels so…
you.
I’m sorry. I should have called or waited until the morning, but I couldn’t sleep and…Is this it then, Tori? Am I fired?”

“I, um, I’m not decent,” she said quietly. “Give me a minute to get dressed and we can talk. I can hardly sleep either.”

“We do some of our best talking when one of us is half-dressed and no words are spoken.” He laughed lightly. Then instead of leaving, he stepped into her room and closed the door behind him. Walking over to her bed, he turned on the small lamp on the nightstand.

His eyes raked across her bare shoulders briefly before meeting her gaze. “Scoot over.”

She could feel her heartbeat lodge in her throat and she waited for it to come out of her mouth, but managed to scoot over just the same. He propped a couple of pillows against her headboard after kicking his shoes off. Then he lay back against the pillows, so that he was mostly lying down with his head slightly elevated. She remained sitting forward, afraid to move. She was mostly naked except for her panties.

“I should have told you about the dancing, especially after you told me about wanting things to be perfect for Kara. I guess I ruined the whole perfect thing for you, didn’t I?”

Talking was impossible with him stretched out on her bed, even in jeans and a T-shirt, when a little less than three hours ago he’d been basically having sex with her while she was fully clothed and him in his underwear. Now she was the one in her underwear with him fully dressed. Glancing over her shoulder at him, his eyes said that he was finally ready to share something about himself. How could she call herself a friend if she turned him away when he needed to talk?

“No. You didn’t ruin anything. My mother ruined that for me years ago. I am the product of one of my father’s many affairs…a bastard if you will. Kara is his
legitimate
daughter, which she points out to me every chance she gets. My mother dumped me and ran when my father refused to leave Kara’s mom to marry her. Long story short, I’m the black sheep,” she explained.

Then the answer to Seth’s issues came to her as clear as crystal. For once, being the black sheep would work to her benefit. The gold at the end of the phony rainbow of a relationship that she had with her father, if she could even call it a relationship, would finally serve a purpose. It was simple really and a better way of thumbing her nose at her father’s prestige and money than anything she had ever daydreamed about. Looking at Seth now, she knew he would never allow her to do something like that for him, but once it was complete, he wouldn’t be able to change it.

“My parents are divorced. Caleb and I don’t get along with our dad very well and we haven’t even spoken to him since I was in high school. He has a new family now and they live out in Colorado. My mom lives in Arizona. I only ended up here because of Rusty,” he said.

Then she felt it—the backs of his fingers skimming along her lower back. He appeared lost in thought and completely unaware that his touch was making every hair on her body stand up. Swallowing the attraction she felt for him, which felt as if it was choking her, she said, “Go on.”

“My mom basically raised Caleb and I all by herself, so when I first graduated high school I went into the Army because it was one less mouth for her to feed. After my first tour, I came home content, but the only work I could find was dancing. I did that for about a year and a half, but when Caleb was a senior in high school and started talking college, I knew mom would need help with that so I re-enlisted. That’s when I met Rusty, Ian and Ronnie. We’ve been together ever since.” He smiled at her as his fingers continued to caress her back.

Reaching behind her, she adjusted the pillows on her side so that she could lean back as well and stop the torment of his fingers. The man had every inch of her skin on full alert. She made sure the covers stayed tucked around her undeveloped breasts. When she relaxed back in the same position as him, she made the mistake of turning her head in his direction. Their faces were mere inches apart and he was wearing that grin.… Soon enough she was grinning, too. She couldn’t stay mad at him for long
.

“I managed to pay off most of Caleb’s college and still put a little money back, and was thinking about trying to get a house and split the payments with Ian and Ronnie since Rusty has his own house. Then Kayla came along, which just left Ian and I. So with Caleb graduated from college and struggling to find work, I invited him out here to stay with us,” he said. “That was not one of my better suggestions. He was coming out here so I could teach him about dancing. I should have known he wasn’t cut out to be a dancer, but fate stepped in and made sure that didn’t happen after all.”

His expression displayed his guilt and before she could stop herself, she reached over and ran a finger across one of his eyebrows and down his cheek. “His accident was not your fault, Seth,” she whispered.

When she pulled her hand back, he leaned forward and kissed her bare shoulder. His warm breath against her hyper-sensitive skin made her nipples pebble. For once she was thankful for fitting an A cup comfortably. The hardened tips weren’t as obvious.

“You are so different from any woman I’ve ever met,” he whispered.

“How so?” she asked.

“Most women want me for the way I look or the way I give them pleasure. For sex, or some form of it. For the first time in…maybe ever, a woman I want doesn’t want me for anything other than as a friend. Which is probably why I’m sharing my entire life story with you right now,” he said with a laugh. “I shouldn’t have done that with you tonight. I’m sorry if I embarrassed you or messed up your visit with Kara.”