“It will be easier if we don’t see each other again.”
“Easier on whom? You? Or Cole?”
Jenna did have a way of cutting to the heart of the matter.
“Children aren’t part of his plan.”
It had taken years for her heart to heal the last time Cole had walked out of her life.
She couldn’t go through that again.
Chapter Twenty
“I’
m sorry you had to cut your visit short, Cole, but Mr. Matheson was quite clear that he wanted
you
to fly him to Saint Louis in the morning. I got the impression he would have taken his business elsewhere if I’d tried to reschedule.”
Iola’s instincts were probably right, Cole thought grimly. Matheson was the CEO of a software company who expected everything to go a certain way.
His
way.
“You did the right thing.” Cole glanced in the rearview mirror and saw a flash of sapphire-blue water, trimmed in gold from the setting sun, before he turned onto the highway.
He’d hoped that he and Grace would have an opportunity to talk, but the mayor’s meeting must have gone on longer than she’d expected.
Or she’s avoiding you.
Even as Cole shoved that unwelcome thought aside, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. Even before the storm had hit, he’d felt a chasm opening up between them.
“Hello? Is anyone out there?” Iola’s teasing voice intruded on his thoughts.
“Sorry.”
“Uh-huh.” Iola sounded skeptical. “What happened this weekend? Usually you’re calling me every fifteen minutes, asking for an update. I haven’t heard from you all weekend.”
“I don’t call you every fifteen minutes.” It was more like every half hour. “And you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”
“The only thing I
wouldn’t
believe is that you met someone, fell in love and now Virgil and I will have a new place to go on vacation.”
“I’ll see you in the morning.” Cole was glad Iola couldn’t see his expression.
He ended the call and glanced at the digital clock glowing on the dash. It was almost nine, but he decided to leave Grace a brief message, letting her know he was on his way back to Madison.
“Hello?”
“I thought I’d get your voice mail.” Just the sound of Grace’s voice lifted his spirits. “Is the meeting over?”
“Five minutes ago. I’m walking to the parking lot now.”
Cole heard the sound of laughter in the background and found himself wishing he was there. He’d gotten to know her friends over the weekend and it had felt good to laugh with them during the competition. Work beside them in the aftermath of the storm.
Other than his family, Cole had never felt that connected to a group of people. If Grace felt the same way, it was no wonder she’d decided to move back to Mirror Lake after she’d earned her degree.
“Are you on your way home?” he asked.
“I’ll be there in about five minutes. You can stop over for a while.”
An hour ago, those were the words Cole had been hoping to hear.
“I’d love to...but I’m on my way back to Madison.”
“Is everything all right?”
“Something came up at work that I have to deal with. One of my clients decided to go to Saint Louis at seven o’clock tomorrow morning and I’m the only one who can get him there.”
“I didn’t realize you were the only one who flew the planes.”
Plane,
he silently corrected. “Virgil, Iola’s husband, helps with the flight school, but he isn’t comfortable making long-distance trips anymore. I don’t mind because that’s my favorite part of the job.”
“I see.”
It was strange, Cole thought, how two simple words could weigh down a conversation.
“I was thinking I might fly the Cessna to Mirror Lake Saturday when I come up for our dinner date. We could go for a ride after church Sunday.”
“About Saturday...I’m afraid something’s come up. I’m going to be busy.”
“Busy,” Cole repeated.
Grace hadn’t planned to have this conversation now, but maybe it was better to get it over with. Even though her heart felt like it was going through a shredder.
“What about the following Saturday? Will something come up again?” he added quietly.
“Yes.”
The silence that stretched between them made it difficult to breathe.
“What happened, Grace? Are you still holding what I did in the past against me? I’m sorry I wasn’t honest with you at the time, but I did what I thought was best.”
“This has nothing to do with the past.” It was about the future.
“I’m willing to do what it takes to make this work, Grace.”
“I’m not.” Her throat began to swell shut. “I don’t want a long-distance relationship, Cole.”
“Alex Porter still works in Chicago.”
“But he lives in Mirror Lake.”
She heard Cole sigh. “Grace...let’s talk about this Saturday. Over dinner.”
The husky plea cut through her defenses. Grace was tempted to give in and say yes, but the headlights illuminated something at the end of Sloan’s driveway that hadn’t been there the last time she’d driven past it.
A “For Sale” sign.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’m sorry.”
“So am I,” Cole said tightly. “I’m sorry you’re giving up before we have a chance to see where this will lead.”
Grace hoped she knew exactly where it would lead.
To the fulfillment of his dream.
* * *
“There’s someone waiting to see you.”
Iola nodded at the door that separated the waiting area from the oversize storage area that housed a rickety desk and a metal filing cabinet.
“In my office?” Cole’s eyes narrowed.
No one but family ever sweet-talked their way past his receptionist. Iola considered herself a good judge of character and her opinion was generally based on a potential client’s reaction to the vinyl chairs lined up under the window across from her desk. The ones Cole had rescued from the curb one afternoon and bandaged with strips of duct tape.
Cole was downright curious now.
He pushed open the door and his gaze landed on the guy sitting behind the desk. In
his
chair.
“Porter?” A list of possible reasons for Alex’s unexpected appearance streaked through Cole’s mind and none of them calmed the sudden, erratic beat of his heart. “What are you doing here?”
Alex reached out and idly toyed with the bouquet of Bic pens that sprouted from a canning jar next to the computer. “I’ve been in the area on business for a few days, and Thor decided to be difficult. He threw a tantrum on the beltline and left me stranded, so I took a taxi here.”
Cole had to ask. “Thor?”
“Kate’s Thunderbird.” Alex rolled his eyes. “She thought a road trip would be good for the car and me. Bonding time and all that.”
Cole tried to picture what that would look like. Alex singing along with the radio? Patting the car’s bumper?
“Don’t say it,” Alex warned.
“Say what?”
“Whatever you were just thinking.” Porter rose to his feet and lifted a ceramic mug. The one Bettina had made in her high school ceramics class. The one that said Cole’s Cup in bright green letters. “Coffee? Iola made a fresh pot.”
Iola didn’t make a fresh pot of coffee for him after eight o’clock in the morning, and it was going on two.
“No, thanks.” Cole cleared his throat. “I’ve got a few things to do—”
“Really? Because Iola said you were free the rest of the weekend and I need a ride back to Mirror Lake. Kate is making dinner tonight, and I promised I wouldn’t be late.”
Cole’s mouth dropped open. “You want
me
to take you there? In my plane?”
“Whenever you’re ready.” Alex tossed back the last sip of coffee and set down the cup.
“From the amount of time you’ve been waiting, you could have rented a car and been halfway back to there by now,” Cole pointed out.
Alex’s lips curled up at the corners. If Cole didn’t know better, he might—just might—have described it as a smile.
“I didn’t think of that.”
Cole didn’t believe him for an instant. Porter was the kind of guy who thought about everything. Inside, outside and upside down.
“Sorry, I can’t do it.”
“Is it because I didn’t say the magic word?” Alex shook his head. “I always seem to forget that part.”
“Mr. Porter?” Virgil poked his head in the doorway. “I’m all set for your tour.”
Cole had no idea they’d started giving tours.
“I’ll tag along.” He couldn’t prevent the sarcasm from leaching into his voice. “If you don’t mind.”
Alex cuffed Cole on the shoulder as he stalked past. “Not at all.”
They followed Virgil into the hangar and Cole tried to stay calm while Alex examined everything from the number of outlets in the wall to the framed newspaper photo of Cole’s dad when he’d received an award for heroism after rescuing a woman from a burning building.
And the tour still lasted less than ten minutes.
Alex, however, didn’t seem in any hurry to leave. He took a slow lap around the Cessna, leaving Cole with two options. Leave him alone or follow.
Something told him it wasn’t a good idea to leave Alex Porter alone.
“How is—”
Grace?
“—everything in town?”
“Almost back to normal.”
“And...Kate?”
“I would say she’s normal, too, but we both know I’d be exaggerating.” There was no hint of criticism embedded in the words, only a deep love for the woman Alex intended to marry.
Cole wrestled down a surge of envy as he ducked under the wing of the plane and checked something he’d already checked twice since his last flight.
“Grace is fine, too,” Alex drawled, answering the question Cole hadn’t scraped up the courage to ask. “Tired, but I guess that comes with the territory. Kate and Abby have been organizing meals—”
Cole’s head jerked up and almost connected with the underside of the wing. “Grace is sick?”
Alex stared at him for a moment. “Kate was right. Again. I’m never going to hear the end of it,” he muttered. “Grace didn’t tell you.”
“Tell me what? I haven’t talked to her since—”
she broke our date and told me she didn’t want to
see me again
“—I left town two weeks ago.”
Porter hesitated, which only increased the fear swirling in Cole’s gut. Alex wasn’t the type of guy who struggled to find the right words.
“She’s been busy,” he finally said. “With the baby.”
Cole couldn’t have heard him right. “Grace doesn’t have a baby.”
“She does now. You know Stephanie chose adoption?”
Cole nodded. “I found out when we went to visit her the next day.”
“Grace took Hannah home from the hospital until she’s placed in a permanent home.”
Cole remembered the hospital social worker who’d asked Grace to meet with her.
Something came up,
she’d said on the phone the last time they’d spoken.
Grace must have known that Hannah would be with her.
So why hadn’t she simply explained the situation?
Cole grabbed his clipboard with the preflight checklist.
“I’ll have the plane ready in an hour.”
Chapter Twenty-One
G
race had been on autopilot for the last half hour, walking the floors and counting the animals in the ark on the wallpaper border until green giraffes and blue kangaroos danced in her head.
She heard a soft rap on the front door and started down the stairs.
“One of your admirers is here, sweetie.” Grace dropped a kiss on the tiny face peeking out from the petals of the pink blanket.
Jenna had mentioned she was going to stop over for a few minutes to drop off a “little something.” All of Grace’s friends had been in and out the past few days, bringing meals and gifts. Arguing over who got to hold Hannah. Right now, they were the only people allowed to see her like this. Sleep-deprived. Wearing sweatpants and a T-shirt that smelled like baby powder.
She winced when she saw the pile of freshly laundered towels on the sofa that needed to be folded.
“Come in.” Grace raised her voice a notch above the lullaby drifting from the miniature speakers set up on the coffee table, a present from Zoey and Matt.
The front door opened and closed with a soft click.
“Things are a little chaotic at the mo—” Grace’s heart buckled when Cole sauntered into the living room.
He looked...amazing. A heather-gray shirt that set off his eyes. Faded jeans and a lightweight jacket embroidered with the Painted Skies logo.
It wasn’t fair that he smelled good, too.
While she stared at him, speechless, he padded toward her, his eyes focused on the baby in her arms. A split second later, her arms were empty and Cole was cradling Hannah against the strong plane of his chest.
It didn’t cross Grace’s mind to protest.
“Hey, there, peanut.” His voice rumbled out, as soft and soothing as the chenille blanket she’d wrapped around Hannah after her bath.
“What are you doing here?” Grace blurted.
“We have a dinner date, remember?”
A dinner date two weeks ago. And one she distinctly remembered
canceling.
“I can’t go anywhere.” Grace clutched a pillow against her stomach to hide a stain on the front of her shirt.
Cole tossed a smile her way. “I stopped on the way here and ordered a pizza. Deluxe, extra cheese, no mushrooms.”
Grace’s stomach rumbled. “Is it hot?”
“Guaranteed or your money back.” Cole grinned and she closed her eyes. A poor defense against his irresistible charm, but she was tired.
And way too happy to see him.
Grace’s gaze narrowed on the brightly colored package in his hand.
“Who told you?”
Cole didn’t have to ask what she meant. “Porter paid me a visit earlier this afternoon.”
“Alex?”
Grace choked out. She’d made her friends promise that no one would interfere with her decision, but it hadn’t crossed her mind to extract one from their significant others.
“He got stranded in Madison and asked me to fly him back for the dinner. He said you’ve been busy with the baby. But that leads to another question. Why didn’t
you
tell me?”
Guilt pinched her conscience. “Everything happened so fast.”
It was a lame excuse and she could tell she hadn’t fooled Cole. His next question confirmed it.
“You offered to take Hannah the day you met with the social worker, didn’t you?”
“Hannah was being released from the hospital and needed a place to go.” Grace sat down on the sofa and tucked her bare feet beneath her. “I was the logical choice. Stephanie is going through a private adoption agency and it’s important to her that she meet the couple who wants to adopt Hannah. That’s why the process is taking a little longer than usual.”
Cole looked down at Hannah with a tenderness that made Grace’s heart ache. “She’s bigger.”
“She’s a sweetie. She eats well and gets up only a few times a night.”
“Who watches her during the day?”
“I took a leave of absence from work.”
She saw the flicker of surprise in Cole’s eyes before he could hide it. “How long do you think she’ll be with you?”
Not long enough. “I’m not sure.”
“Is Hannah the reason you canceled our dinner date?”
Grace knotted her hands together in her lap. “I’m not interested in a long-distance relationship, remember?”
Cole regarded her steadily. “That’s what you told me.”
But he didn’t believe her.
“It won’t...work.”
“Why not? We can still see each other on the weekends. I’ll help with Hannah while she’s here.”
She knew he would help. That was the problem. But Cole thought the situation was temporary. It was one thing to devote a few hours to caring for a child...another to make a child part of your life.
“I think I heard Jenna’s car.” Grace vaulted to her feet and practically sprinted to the front door. “I’ll be right back.”
It snapped shut behind her.
“That went well.” Cole looked down at Hannah. “I think she’s coming around. But feel free to put a good word in for me, okay?”
“’Kay.”
Cole slowly lifted his head. A little boy with tousled blond hair and enormous cinnamon brown eyes stood a few feet away, clutching the polka-dot elephant he had bought for Hannah in the hospital gift shop.
“Hi,” Cole said cautiously.
The boy scrambled onto the sofa and stared at him. “Who’re you?”
“I’m Cole.”
“I’m this many.” The boy carefully pressed down his thumb and pinkie and held up three fingers.
“Three,” Cole repeated solemnly. “You’re a big boy.”
He was rewarded with a bright smile. “Hannah sleeping.”
Cole glanced down at the baby nestled in the crook of his arm and then at the boy clad in race car pajamas. “It must be past her bedtime. Are
you
supposed to be sleeping?”
“Nope.”
“Sorry it took so long. The pizza delivery guy pulled in right behind Jenna...” Grace braked in the middle of the room when she spotted them.
“No problem,” Cole said easily. “We were just getting acquainted, weren’t we?”
“I’m hungry.” The boy slid off the sofa and padded toward her, his straight little nose twitching as the aroma of melted cheese permeated the air.
“You’re always hungry.” Grace tickled his belly and he giggled. “Why don’t you build a tower for me while I set the table, sweetie?”
“Okay.” He upended a basket of wooden blocks and plunked down in the middle of them.
Cole remembered his brothers doing the same thing and smiled. He looked at Grace. “So, who’s your friend?”
She hesitated for a fleeting moment and then smiled back.
“His name is Michael.”
* * *
“You’re still here.”
Grace paused on the bottom step as Cole finished folding the last of the towels.
“Where did you think I’d go?”
Her gaze shifted to the door and the small but telling gesture landed like a kick to his solar plexus.
Right. He supposed some guys would have taken off the minute her back was turned, but Cole needed some answers. They hadn’t had an opportunity to talk after she’d dropped that bombshell on him. The phone had started to ring, Michael’s block tower had fallen over and Hannah decided it was time for her bottle. All within the space of sixty seconds.
Cole helped Michael rebuild the tower while Grace fed Hannah. They’d munched on cold pizza and when she’d put the kids to bed, he’d picked up the toys scattered around the living room.
“You probably have things to do.” She lingered at the bottom of the staircase. “I shouldn’t keep you.”
“Not really.”
And yes, you should.
Grace finally ventured into the living room, pausing to fluff a pillow that didn’t need to be fluffed. Brushing an invisible piece of lint from a cushion.
Cole couldn’t stand to see her so uncertain. A week ago, she’d been at his side, in his arms, and he had no idea what to do or say to cross the distance between them.
“So...Hannah and Michael are both waiting to be adopted?” he ventured.
“Michael’s adoption was finalized two days ago,” Grace said softly.
“Then why is he with you?”
“Because I’m the one who adopted him.”
Cole didn’t think it was possible, but she’d shocked him all over again.
Grace sank into the closest chair and turned to face him. “Under the Safe Haven law, babies can be left at a hospital or police or fire station up to seventy-two hours after they’re born and the parents won’t face prosecution for abandonment.”
Cole’s stomach twisted as the words sank in. “Michael?”
“He was several weeks premature, so he spent a month in the NICU until his lungs were fully developed. After that, he was placed in temporary foster care that turned out to not be so temporary because he had some minor health issues.
“The couple whom Michael lived with considered adopting him, but changed their minds when they found out recently they were going to have twins.” Grace reached between the sofa cushions and smiled as she pulled out a plastic truck. “That’s when Meredith, the director of a private adoption agency, called me.”
“Hasn’t it been difficult for Michael to adjust to a new home? To you?”
“Meredith brought him over for a few hours every day this week so we could get to know each other. He moved in Thursday and so far, he’s been doing remarkably well. They both are.”
“How did this happen so fast?” Cole frowned. “I thought the adoption process could take a while.”
“It wasn’t fast.” Grace’s lips tipped in a rueful smile. “I’ve been on the waiting list for months.”
She’d been
planning
to adopt.
Cole tried to wrap his mind around the news.
“I know what you’re thinking.” Grace sighed. “My parents and my older sister said the same thing. I’m going to have a hard time letting Hannah go when the time comes.”
“You will,” Cole agreed, “but that’s not what I was thinking. I was thinking that one of the things I love about you is that you’re one of those people who has the courage to say yes.”
Grace stared at him—and promptly burst into tears.
It wasn’t quite the response Cole expected.
He followed his instincts and pulled her into his arms. Smiled when he caught a whiff of baby powder mingling with the familiar scent of lilacs.
When the storm began to subside, with it came the knowledge that he didn’t want to let her go.
“I’m sorry,” Grace told his shirt pocket.
“Don’t apologize. Sleep deprivation isn’t easy on anyone and you’re adjusting to a lot of changes, like any new mom. Things will get easier.”
She blinked up at him. “When?”
Cole thought about Bettina and the twins. “In about fifteen years.”
A smile shimmered in Grace’s eyes. She drew back a few inches, putting some distance between them.
“I better go to bed or Hannah will wake up right when I’m about to fall asleep.”
The enormity of what she’d taken on—alone—suddenly hit him.
A newborn baby and an active toddler.
Cole remembered the times he’d been overwhelmed taking care of his siblings. The nights he’d fallen asleep on top of the blankets because he’d been too tired to crawl between them. The nights he’d played flashlight tag with his brothers and read Bettina’s favorite fairy tale over and over, wearing the paper crown she’d made him.
He missed it.
The house was clean. He had the evenings to himself. And all he’d felt over the past two weeks was a yawning emptiness. He’d found himself missing Grace more than he’d thought was possible. And he missed his family.
“What time is the service tomorrow morning?”
Grace’s forehead puckered. “Nine, but—”
“I’ll be here at eight-thirty.”
* * *
He showed up at eight. With warm cinnamon rolls from the café and a cup of black coffee that cleared the cobwebs from Grace’s brain before she even took a sip.
Grace tried to avoid the knowing looks on her friends’ faces when she and Cole walked into church with the children, but knew it was only a matter of time before one—or six—of them came over to say hello. It didn’t help that Hannah and Michael drew a crowd wherever they went.
Zoey had managed to coax Michael to come with her to the nursery by mentioning the new slide, so Grace had placed him in her friend’s capable hands.
“Hey, cutie.” Abby neatly removed the baby from her arms as the opening prelude started. “And Grace. And Cole.”
“We’re having a potluck after church today.” Kate eased in next to Abby. “You’re staying, right?”
“I didn’t bring anything to contribute, and Hannah and Michael take a nap right after lunch.”
“That’s the beauty of a potluck.” Emma had joined the ranks, the three of them forming a formidable wall of women who weren’t going to take no for an answer. “There’s plenty of food and you can leave right afterward. No cleanup.”
Grace was relieved when the prelude ended, a cue for Matt to greet the congregation. Abby reluctantly returned Hannah and Kate’s parting smile promised the conversation wasn’t over.
“You know we won’t be able to leave the parking lot until we’ve eaten our weight in pasta salad, right?” Cole murmured.
Grace tried to ignore the flutter the word
we
stirred inside her chest.
“You can stay,” she told him. “I’m sure there are people you’d like to talk to.”
Like Sissy Perkins. And Marty Sullivan.
Cole gave her the look she was beginning to recognize. “We rode in the same car. You’re stuck with me.”
“Faye McAllister was right,” Grace whispered. “You do have a stubborn chin.”
He winked at her, as if she’d just paid him a compliment.
It was the first time in years that Grace hadn’t been able to concentrate on one of Matt’s sermons. Cole was so close that every time she took a breath, she inhaled the fresh scent of soap and freshly laundered cotton. Her one hope was that Hannah would raise a ruckus so she would have to take her out of the sanctuary, but the baby refused to cooperate and slept through the majority of the service.
By the time Matt closed in prayer, Grace was ready to bolt. She buckled Hannah into her infant seat and reached for the diaper bag.
Cole had already slung it over his arm. On anyone else, pink and lavender bunnies would have looked comical. On Cole, they only made him look more masculine. And handsome.