Malspire (16 page)

"Mister Olvan?"

"Captain?"

I was now in my cabin consulting my charts and notes taken with a sextant. They were all copied from standard navy charts and notoriously out of date. "Is there no way of painting the name in this weather?"

"None, Captain. Mister Harl assures me that it's just not possible. We have to pray for better weather or find calm waters."

Expecting this answer, I was already studying the coastline. I knew we should have returned to Umuron to prepare for such an endeavour but I also knew that if we had returned, I would have lost the courage for this madness. I would have seen reason, but did not want reason. I wanted adventure.

"Then there's nothing for it. We must make for land and find a cove or natural harbour. Do you know much about these waters?"

"No, sir. Sorry."

I sneered at the young officer, not that I knew much about them myself. "Well. As far as I can tell, Mister Olvan, we're not close to any major ports. We need to see some land for confirmation of our location anyway. Head south. Call me when land is spotted."

"Aye, Captain."

With that, I tugged off my boots, went to my cot and lay down on my back for a short sleep. On deck I could hear Olvan shouting orders. The ship was being buffeted by waves. I had found sleeping when at sea much preferable to land. In fact when at port I often found it hard to get a good night's sleep being so used to the noise of the engine, the thrashing of the wheel, the heaving waters. I liked the sea. I liked the raw elements and their mischievous ways and being close to the edge were all that stood between me and the abyss was some cleverly crafted woodwork and skilled men. Just as I closed my eyes, there was a knock at my cabin door. I groaned, but did not rise or even open my eyes. "Enter!"

The door opened and closed. There were some footsteps. I looked to see Doctor Eebel with his red rimmed eyes, holding onto a post, looking madly at me.

"As you can see, I'm trying to get some rest. What is it you want and be quick about it?"

"What the hells am I doing here?" The boat heaved and the doctor had to hold on with both hands.

"You're a ship's surgeon. You go where the ship goes," I said, closing my eyes again, perhaps a little unnerved by the look on the doctor, but wanted to show an indifference to the doctor's personal problems as a captain should. Also, I wanted a rest and the drunk could wait.

"There's booze on this ship. I know it. I can smell it. The men are hiding it from me!"

"I recon the men have taken it upon themselves to save you from the dark spirits, but money is often a fine argument in such a predicament."

"I'm broke! I was kicked out of this damned navy and left penniless. I need a drink!"

"None to be had here," I growled. It was a lie, but I preferred a sober surgeon as did the crew. I was also not sure I liked the man or not. At least, I did not respect him yet.

"I didn't ask to be here. I just wanted to go home. I wanted to drink. I wanted to drown in the stuff, and now I'm caught somewhere between life and death and it's all thanks to you!"

I should have been angry but instead I was roused by the anguish in the man's voice and relenting, sat up. "Sit down, Doctor Eebel."

The doctor watched me for a moment then, turned the captain's chair round and sat in it. It was contrary to protocol for anyone else to sit in the captain's chair but I was now getting used to the doctor's disregard for such conventions.

"What's your given name?" I asked.

"Nalistor."

"May I call you Nalistor?”

The doctor shrugged.

"You are here, Nalistor because we need a doctor and you were the only one available."

Nalistor was silent. His hands were shaking.

"The Navy is the Emperor's arm. We are his tools. We are all duty bound to serve him and the Empire. Are you a loyal servant of the Emperor, Nalistor?"

"Never met the man."

I looked up sharply. I was about to chastise the doctor for his lack of respect for the Empire's father, the great leader of the Emben Empire, but before I did, it struck me that I had never met the man either. What did I really care for the Emperor? I had a certain concept of duty to the Empire and Duchy, but the Emperor was just a man; a figure head. The more I thought about it, the more I realised that the doctor had a point.

"If death is what you want, then I don't see why you're complaining. We're in enemy waters, about to enter an enemy port. If captured, we'll be treated as spies, and probably tortured, then executed."

After a further silence, the doctor leaned forwards and said, "You certainly have a way of putting one's mind at ease, Captain. I'm so pleased we had this talk." The mood eased and the doctor visibly relaxed a little.

"It's my fault, doctor. I was keen to be about our business and at sea. You were the only doctor available."

"I know why you did it. I don't see how I'm much good to you as I can just as easily take your leg off when the wound is in the arm, but I know why. You want to impress someone," Nalistor stated. "Not the navy, nor the men either. You don't think much of the high and mighty, but someone."

I was puzzled, even annoyed by this statement, but I knew I was angry because Nalistor had hit a nerve. I was trying to prove something to someone, but I didn't require or want the respect of others. At least that was what I told myself. Was it my father? Was it my brother? My brother loved and respected me whatever. I had no need to prove anything to Ajator.

The doctor noticed my struggle. "Yourself. It's you that you're testing and pushing. You may be the grim and moody captain son of a lord admiral, but I know you. I see right through you, Captain Malspire."

"You presume a lot Doctor Eebel."

"Not Nalistor anymore? I tell the truth as I see it and you get prickly?"

"The truth? We hardly know one another. You spend your time hidden away, drinking whatever spirits you can find, and you presume to know me?"

"I've been watching you. Even when I'm drunk as a fish I see people. It's a way I have. You have a dark soul, and you're rough cut, but you're not an evil man. You've a sense of right and wrong better than most, but you're cursed.”

"Cursed?"

"Aye, cursed by insecurity. Cursed by a rot in the soul. You think little of yourself and little of humanity, and feel the need to prove yourself better in your own eyes," the doctor hissed.  "It will be the death of you. Probably the death of us all!"

I considered this. It annoyed me, but maybe that was because it was true.

"I'm still young and inexperienced, doctor, I know this. I'm also wrong to get angry with another officer for telling the truth as he sees it. I'll admit that there might be some truth to what you say." I forced myself to say these words. I wanted truth and respected honesty, wanting to be open to it even when it grated. A fire in me was bursting to lash out and hurt the doctor, but I forced it back. Like the fear I had learned to fight, the anger too was to be controlled.

"Well, I'm old before my time and tired. Truth or not, I'm still stuck on this rotting boat without a drink and a long way from home."

"Where is your home?"

"The valleys of Brimalod, a long way from the sea. I'm a mountain man." Nalistor reflected on his homeland for a moment. "I had land once. Not much. Not fertile, but plenty of wood."

"A squire?"

“Yes. Not aristocracy, but new money. I had land, a wife and a son on the way. I should have stuck to that, but I wanted more."

I nodded. "Why did you become a doctor if you had land and resources?"

"I met my wife, Astinan in Norlan where I was studying medicine. I went to Norlan to study because I hated the country. I was young and wanted to see the world, but I fell in love, so I married her and returned home a doctor but with the intention of making it big instead." Nalistor wrung his hands and rocked gently as he spoke. "I wanted to put her in the finest manor, with the finest clothes, food and wine. I wanted to make her a princess. She was everything to me, and I wanted the world for her." He fell silent.

"Go on," I said.

"I was a fine doctor. I did well in my studies, and was sought after, but I let it go. I borrowed money and built a large saw mill. I borrowed more money and purchased barges, horses, carts, tools and men. Then the Emperor in his wisdom decided that the Empire's insatiable hunger for timber would come from the northern realms, and ruled that the woodlands of the homelands were protected," said the doctor bitterly.

"I see." I knew of this ruling as it affected my own home. Timber was always in great demand and the homelands were in danger of losing all its forests and woodlands to the Navy and its ships. A single battle ship could take six thousand oaks to build. Lords of the skies knew how many a grand battleship would take to build. An entire forest! Of course, the Guild of Sea Merchants was making a fortune, having sole rights to the shipping of the timber and also happened to own vast swathes of northern forests.

"I had borrowed far more than I could pay off as a doctor, so I was bankrupted. The bankers took my lands, my goods, and every penny I had and left us to starvation. As a doctor in disgrace I could get little work, so we were forced to Norlan again where I was taken in by the Navy who cared nothing for reputation, but for skill as a surgeon."

"The ship needs a surgeon."

"It does that, but a wife doesn't. The very first letter I got from her told me that she had divorced me and was moving on. Ever been bankrupted, Captain Ardalrion?"

"No. I never had to borrow money."

"Of course not. You're an aristocrat with a rich father. When you're bankrupted, you lose everything. Even the right to a wife. She just had to sign a single document and that was that. It was three years before I got a chance to visit her. She was remarried to a banker in the city and had a child. It was my child. A boy who hid behind his new father when I stood at their door, drenched and freezing in the cold rain, begging for another chance, begging for justice." The doctor clenched his fists. "There was no justice to be found there. The banker swine had me carried off and beaten black and blue. No justice! But I found it elsewhere, Captain Ardalrion. I found it in a bottle, and the bottle has never let me down."

I felt awkward. What could I say? I said nothing.

"You're still young. You wouldn't know about these things."

"I know about rejection," I said, understanding the need to find a common thread. "I know what it is like to be alone."

"Yes," said Nalistor. "You do." It was unnerving how the doctor was so confident in his judgement of me. "I know about your brother. I've seen him. Like night and day you two. Twins, are you?"

"Yes. How do you know about my brother?"

"You're both the sons of Lord Admiral Lord Ardalrion whom I serve. Everyone knows about you two. Your brother is a shining star in the Navy. A born hero of the Empire. He's cursed too."

"What?" I was shocked by this statement. "How can he be cursed?" How could anyone think this of Ajator?

"I don't know. Something's not right though. Something's eating at him."

***

The day was drawing to a close by the time the call came.

"Land ho!"

The ship must have been off course as I had expected to sea land sooner, understanding now the need for a proper navigation officer. It would be dark by the time we reached the coast. There was a good chance that it would be too risky to take her in and we would have to wait for the morning. Doctor Eebel had left me in a contemplative mood and I never managed to fall asleep, but now I concentrated on the distant coast. It was cold but not the biting chill of winter. The sky was a glorious blaze of gold and scarlet, broken by dark, ragged clouds. Standing on the castle, I scanned the landscape through my glass. Above us, seagulls gathered and circled, floating on the strong winds. The sea was rough but not too rough to move in closer.

"The land looks rocky, Mister Harl. Cracked bluffs and fingers of stone in the waters."

"It's getting late, Captain."

"What do you think? Should we try to find a cove now or wait until tomorrow?"

"We can get closer, sir."

So we did, and as the sun touched the horizon, I saw what looked like a fjord or perhaps the mouth of a river that had cut a deep gorge in the rocky face of the land.

I hesitated. All of a sudden, something felt chilling beyond the wind, as though a shadow reached out to us from that gorge, as though a malevolent presence looked upon us and beckoned us in. I hesitated, but I did not baulk. "Take us in, Mister Harl. Keep a distance from the rocks." It was nerves, nothing more, I told myself. In time I would learn to better trust my instincts, but not yet, not then.

I could hear the breakers and see where they foamed white as they hissed and crashed on the black rocks sending up plumes of spray. Birds sat in the nooks and cuts in the higher reaches, watching the Lady Ocean as she slowly entered the waterway. It quickly got dark in that rent in the coastline, but the waters calmed, and the ship surged on into the eerie quietness of the channel.