Read Man From the USSR & Other Plays Online
Authors: Vladimir Nabokov
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KUZNETSOFF
Listen, Olyaâ
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
And left immediately. And you've only been to see me once since and then only for a moment.
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KUZNETSOFF
Listen, Olya: when I decided it was best we didn't live together, you agreed with me, and said you weren't in love with me anymore either. But when you talk like you're talking now, I begin to thinkâno, let me finishâI begin to think you wouldn't mind reviving that love. It would bother me a lot if it turned out that, in spite of our decision, you still feel differently about me than I do about you.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
I can't talk about it today. Let's not. I thought I'd make you laugh with the story about the package.
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KUZNETSOFF
No, I want to clear this up....
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
It's just that kind of day today.... Anyway, there are lots of things you are incapable of understanding. Imagine, say, the sound of a bad violin outside the windowâjust a moment ago, say, just before you cameâactually it didn't happen, since even if I'd heard such a sound I wouldn't have cared....Don't look at me that way. I'm telling you I wouldn't have cared. I don't love you. There was no violin.
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KUZNETSOFF
I don't understand what you're talking about.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
No, you cannot understand.
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KUZNETSOFF
(getting up)
You know, I'd better get going....
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Two years ago, when we lived here in Berlin together, there was some silly, silly song, some dance tune, that boys whistled in the street and organ-grinders played. If you heard that song now you wouldn't even recognize it....
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KUZNETSOFF
This is very irritating.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Stop it. I can't stand it when you get angry like that. Your eyes turn yellow. It's just that I'm nervous today. Don't. You ... you're satisfied with your hotel?
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KUZNETSOFF
You know, you ought to remarry.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Sure, sure, I will. I'll do everything you want. Listen, would you like me to swear that I don't love you? I don't! Do you hear me?
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KUZNETSOFF
Yes, I hear you. Still, I'm unhappy that we had to have this conversation. Right now I simply don't have the time to put my soul to work. And conversations like this put one's soul to work. I'll tell you something: I absolutely can't bear the idea of someone thinking about me with love, with longing, with concern. It distracts me.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
You're right, Alyosha, you're right. I don't want to distract you. There, it's all over.... In fact, there wasn't anything in the first place. You know, I have the feeling Taubendorf is courting me a little,
(laughs)
I like him a lot. I mean it, I really do.
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KUZNETSOFF
I'm not quite satisfied with him. He's a little obtuse. With all his romanticism he lives in a dream world. Well, I must be off.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Alyosha, do you ever think about what you ... what they ... well, about the danger?
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KUZNETSOFF
Only my Aunt Nellie and the Man in the Moon think.
(walks toward the door)
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
(calling after him)
Put on your coat. It's chilly out.
(After Kuznetsoff leaves, Olga Pavlovna remains standing by the table, running her finger along the pattern of the doily. Then she walks around the room: it is evident that she is holding back tears. Hearing footsteps outside the door, she sits down as before and picks up her embroidery. Without knocking, Marianna enters. She is very smartly dressed.)
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MARIANNA
(breathlessly)
I ran into your husband outside. How old is he?
(glances fleetingly at the embroidery)
That certainly is pretty. How old is he?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Thirty-two. Why do you ask?
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MARIANNA
(takes off her coat and hat, and tosses her hair. She is blonde, with the aid of peroxide.)
I've never seen anything like it in my life. The traffic outside is atrocious, one car on top of another, the policeman is performing all kinds of ballet gestures, the pedestrians are waiting for him to stop the traffic, and your husband, cool as a cucumber, goes and crosses! In a straight line. The cars honk at him, the policeman freezes in amazement in a Nizhinsky poseâno reaction, he goes straight across. And yet he looks so peaceable....
What's this part going to beâopenwork or lace?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Lace.
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MARIANNA
I'm so happy there was no shooting today. I'm sick and tired of Moser. He just won't stop pestering me. Someone else might have taken advantage of it to make a career. But I can't. I don't know if you can understand what I mean, dear, but for me art is everything. Art is sacred. Somebody like Pia Mora, who sleeps around, can go for rides with Moser. But I can't. Nothing in life interests me except art. Nothing. How exhausted I get, though! I've got the most demanding partâthe whole film hangs on me. I can imagine what bliss it will be to see it all on the screen afterwards. Good heavens, what's the matter with you, sweetie, what's wrong? Olga Pavlovna! Why are you crying? What happened, Olga Pavlovna?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Don't pay any attention to me.... It's nothing.... It'll go away in a minute....
(She cries, wiping her eyes with her fingers like a child.)
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MARIANNA
What is it, what's the matter? Is something wrong? Come, tell me, darling.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Give me a hankie.
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MARIANNA
It's not quite clean. I'll get you another one.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Never mind.... There, it's over....I just didn't sleep well last night.
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MARIANNA
You want me to run out and get some valerian drops? Oh, wait, I have some here.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
It's all right. Thanks, Marianna Sergeyevna. Really, it's all right. It's all over.
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MARIANNA
Oh, you're crying again. What a shame. Here, drink this. Slowly. Now sit quietly. Let's chat about something.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Let's chat about something,
(blows her nose and laughs)
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MARIANNA
Oh. I've been wanting to ask you for a long time. What exactly does Alexey Matveyevich do?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
I don't know exactly,
(laughs)
Your hankie is all soaked, look. He's involved in various commercial dealings.
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MARIANNA
I hope you don't mind my askingâI believe that, in spite of everything, you're still friendsâbut there's something I did want to ask you.... He isn't a Bolshevik, is he?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Do you hate Bolsheviks a lot, Marianna Sergeyevna?
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MARIANNA
I despise them. Art is above politics.... But they debase art. They burn down marvelous Russian country houses. Olga Pavlovna, don't tell me your husband...
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
His personal life does not concern me. I don't want to know anything.
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MARIANNA
(quickly)
And he never-never says anything to you?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Never.
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MARIANNA
Aha.
(short pause)
And I have very strong suspicions. Imagine, Oshivenski says he saw Alexey Matveyevich day before yesterday sitting in a café with a notorious agent from the Soviet Mission. Engaged in a very friendly conversation. Oshivenski and his wife are absolutely scandalized.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
I was just expecting them today. I don't particularly like that lady and I don't know why she keeps visiting me. But he's a sweet old man, and I'm very sorry for him.
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MARIANNA
Still, it's an awful thing if it's true.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
I think your film is about Bolsheviks, isn't it?
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MARIANNA
Oh, it's a wonderful film! Of course it's still too early to talk about the plot becauseâyou knowâit's being shot in bits and pieces. I'm fully familiar only with my own part. But basically the screenplay has to do with the Russian Revolution. And of course there's a love story mixed in. Absolutely fascinating, I think, very
spannend.
The male lead is Harry Joy. He's a darling.
(a knock at the door. Kuznetsoff enters.)
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KUZNETSOFF
You're still in this room, Olya....
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MARIANNA
Oh, Alexey Matveyevich, I'm glad to have herâ
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
You're back so soon!
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KUZNETSOFF
Yes.
(to Marianna)
And you must teach me how to dance, Ma'am.
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MARIANNA
May I? Want to try right now?
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
(coming alive, with a radiant expression)
What is it, Alyosha? You seem so cheerful.
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MARIANNA
I'll go ask the landlady for a phonograph,
(runs out)
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KUZNETSOFF
Olya, the deal went through. I'm getting even more than I expected. In ten days I'm going back.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
But you will be careful, won't you?
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KUZNETSOFF
What does being careful have to do with it? I'm talking about money.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
I'm particularly afraid this time. But I'm glad for you. Really, I'm very glad.
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KUZNETSOFF
Good.
(Marianna runs back in.)
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MARIANNA
The landlady is grouchy todayâshe says the phonograph is broken.
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Oh, well, you'll do it another time.
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MARIANNA
I told the maid to bring some coffee. She seems grouchy too.
(a knock at the door. Maid's voice:
“Besuch für Frau Kuznetsoff. ”)
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OLGA PAVLOVNA
Für mich?(goes out)
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MARIANNA
Now, kiss meâquick!
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KUZNETSOFF
No, noâplease don't rush me, madam.
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MARIANNA
Why “madam”? Why are you always so distant? When will you learn to be less formal with me ? You don't want to kiss me ? Alec!
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KUZNETSOFF
Oh well, why not....
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MARIANNA
No, now I don't want to.
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KUZNETSOFF
Oh, I keep forgetting to tell youâyou shouldn't use any perfume at all.
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MARIANNA
This is an excellent perfume. You don't understand a thing. It's Houbigant.
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KUZNETSOFF
(sings half-voice)
And my beloved hooligan
gave me an ounce of Houbigant
4
...
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MARIANNA
No, it was from a former admirer. Are you jealous?
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KUZNETSOFF
Marianna, you want to know the truth?
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MARIANNA
Yes, of course.
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KUZNETSOFF
All rightâI'm not the least bit jealous,
(picks up the photograph and examines it again)
I've seen that face before.
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MARIANNA
He was shot by the Bolsheviks last year. In Moscow,
(pause)
And why do you call me “madam”? It's getting unbearable! Alec, wake up!
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KUZNETSOFF
(puts down the portrait, which he has been holding, lost in thought)
Unbearable, is it? Less unbearable than “Alec.”
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MARIANNA
(perching on the arm of his chair and changing her tone of voice)
You're an awfully strange man. I've never had such a strange love affair. I can't even understand how it happened. The way we met in the cellar. Then that crazy drunken evening with the Baron and LyulyaâIt's only been four daysâyet it seems so long ago, doesn't it? I can't understand why I love you.... You're an ugly little thing. But I love you. You've got lots of charm. I love to kiss you here ... and here....