Marriage by Mistake (20 page)

He frowned, clearly not understanding.

Kelly couldn't help giggling. "
You
know." She cocked her head toward the bed. "At this."

"At this?" His eyebrows jumped, then came way
down. "But    wasn't I inventive in Las Vegas?"

"Unh unh." Kelly chuckled and rose onto her
knees. "So I guess there are some advantages to you being, well,
just plain you."

He continued to frown, appearing to digest
this.

"That's good," Kelly assured him.

"Hm." His gaze shifted to one side. "Well I'm
glad something good has come of this."

Kelly stopped. Hearing his tone, she did a
slow blink. "Is something wrong?"

"Is something wrong." He repeated it like a
statement, then pushed himself to a sitting position. "What's wrong
is that you were absolutely correct. I
don't
have any
self-control when it comes to you."

Kelly blinked rapidly now, trying to make
sense of what she was hearing. Well yes, he didn't have
self-control, but hadn't that been the point? She'd thought he'd
let go    happily. For heaven's sake, hadn't they been
going at it like rabbits all afternoon?

With an oath, Dean shoved the covers aside
and stood up. He had a beautiful back, broad at the shoulders,
tapering to the hips. He seemed utterly unaware of his own
nakedness, though, as he began to pace the room.

"We went from a kiss to pure insanity. And
now this    " He threw out an arm, encompassing the room.
"I walked out of my office, just walked out, in order to spend the
afternoon...
here
."

Kelly remained scrunched on her knees,
watching him. She'd thought there had been
joy
in their
lovemaking. But Dean, bitterly pacing the room, did not look the
least bit joyful. He looked, in fact    now that she
really
looked
at him    utterly miserable.

Kelly felt a terrible lowering sensation. It
was as though a dark blanket were getting pulled over the
brightness of her own joy. Why, none of this was what it had
seemed. None of it was what
he
had wanted. He wasn't happy.
He hadn't let go. Nor did he want her, really, at all.

She'd completely mistaken everything.

Dean muttered something unintelligible and
paced away from her again.

A huge knot lodged in her throat. "I'm
sorry."

He stopped. His head whipped around.

"I'm sorry," Kelly repeated, then tried to
swallow the knot. "I certainly didn't intend to make you
unhappy."

Dean stared at her.

"If it's any consolation," Kelly chattered
on, "I don't have much self-control when it comes to you, either. I
mean, believe it or not, I didn't intend this to happen." She waved
her own arm to encompass the room. "Either."

Dean's eyes grew dark. "But you came to my
office. You were dressed like    "

"I know, I know." Kelly looked away and
heaved a deep sigh. "But all I really wanted was to get your
attention."

There was a short silence, and then Dean
barked a laugh. "Consider it gotten."

"Yeah, well." Kelly sank to pull the bed
sheet over her chest. Her heart was shriveling. He was upset he'd
let go with her. He wasn't
happy
about this.

She'd completely fooled herself, just blinded
her eyes. Heck, she'd known he was scared. He'd actually left town
in order to avoid her. That should have told her something. But no.
She'd thought she could push through.

Instead what she'd done was simply push.

"Tell you what." Pulling the sheets with her,
Kelly slipped off the bed. "It's not too late. Put on your clothes,
go back to the office. You can catch up on whatever you left undone
this afternoon."

The expression on Dean's face changed
rapidly. "Go back    ?"

"A few phone calls and I'll bet you can
reschedule whatever appointments you missed." Wrapping the sheet
around her, Kelly hobbled over to her skirt. Her shirt, she saw,
was all the way by the door.

"Kelly    " To her surprise, Dean's
tone indicated resistance to her plan. But there was relief in
there, too. He wanted to go back to the office, retrace his steps,
she could tell.

Kelly bit her lower lip and bent to retrieve
her shirt. Oh, how
had
she fooled herself that he was happy,
that he felt
anything
for her?

"Kelly, no." Dean began to walk toward her,
utterly naked, gloriously so, and way too preoccupied to care. His
tone was firm. "This is my fault. It was my choice to walk out, my
choice to come here. I'm not going to compound my sins by treating
you like a    like a    "

Kelly didn't wait to hear what word he might
come up with. "I'll take a cab home. The party's kind of over,
anyway, don't you think?" She ventured to glance over at him.
Somehow, she smiled.

He paused in the center of the room. His
expression was conflicted. On the one hand, he clearly did want to
go back to the office, to prove he wasn't completely out of
control. On the other hand, he seemed to think there were certain
rules that applied to this kind of situation and they did not
include walking out on a recent sex partner.

Kelly felt warmth rush back into her chest.
He truly was a good man.

Just not one who was ready to love her.

The knot leaped back into her throat. She'd
done it again. Jumped the gun, made up stories about the man's
feelings. Kelly clicked open the door to the bathroom. "It'll just
take me a minute to get dressed."

"Kelly    " Dean stepped toward her
and Kelly halted. The look that was suddenly on his face
   For half an instant she thought he was going to say
something incredible, something magical, something that might allow
her to believe she hadn't made such a terrible mistake, after all.
Then whatever Kelly had seen in Dean's face disappeared.

"I'll call you the cab," he said.

"Right." Kelly pushed open the door of the
bathroom. She managed a breezy smile as she stepped through. Once
the door was closed and she was alone, however, the smile vanished.
She turned to rest her forehead against the closed door.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Here she was in love, and Dean wasn't even
happy he'd
had sex
with her.

Quietly, Kelly knocked her head against the
bathroom door. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

###

Alone in his downtown office that Monday
evening, Dean didn't get much done. It wasn't that he was tired,
though he'd certainly exerted himself during the afternoon spent at
the Parker House. Nor did he have trouble finding the parties he
needed to reach in order to reschedule his missed appointments
   Myers the attorney excluded. No, those weren't his
problems.

His problem was Kelly.

Oh, she wasn't there physically. He couldn't
blame her sensual aura, the clothes she wore, or that special light
in her eyes. But she was there in front of him all the same.

I'm sorry
, she'd said, her voice
hoarse, her eyes shadowed.
I didn't mean to make you
miserable
, she'd said.

Dean sat behind his desk and stared
unseeingly at a budget projection. He couldn't get her voice or
those words out of his mind. And he couldn't help wondering: could
she have been sincere?

Was it possible she really
hadn't
wanted to make him miserable?

At his office desk, Dean squeezed his
fountain pen between his fingers. An hour ago he'd been in her
thrall. Utterly bewitched. Sexually stupefied. He'd easily have
spent the next day, the next week, in her arms. He'd have hated
himself afterwards, but he'd have done it. He'd totally lost
control.

She'd had him just where she wanted him
   that is, just where Dean had imagined she wanted him
   and she'd let go. She'd called a halt to things,
extricated him. She'd even sent him here to his office so he could
take care of his responsibilities.

Dean pushed the budget projection away. He
stared heavily at the opposite wall. One could almost argue she'd
looked out for him, though he wasn't ready to go that far.
However...

However, she most certainly hadn't taken
advantage of him. She hadn't used his weakness to gain some selfish
concession.

Dean scowled and uncurled from his chair.
This was not what he'd expected of her, not what he'd...counted on.
She was supposed to be bad, selfish, manipulative. She was supposed
to be like one of his father's awful brides. Somebody he didn't
have to consider.

Instead, she'd been...a mystery.
Inexplicable.

Dean paced over to the window. With one hand
on the frame, he stared at the lights on the street below. His own
behavior had not been mysterious, however. His own behavior had
been cloddish, at best. Loutish, at worst. The woman had been
giving him the most exhilarating sexual experience of his life, and
he'd brought her to an apology! He'd let her take the blame for his
own flaws, his own miscalculations. She'd left the Parker House
clearly feeling awful, as though she'd done something wrong. He'd
let
her leave that way.

Talk about bad, selfish, and
manipulative.

Cars and people traveled by on the street
fifteen stories below. Dean moved his hand from the window frame to
a spot beneath his tie.

No, he was not getting much accomplished here
at the office.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

It was not difficult for Felicia to see that
her mother was unhappy. Over dinner on Monday evening in the formal
dining room, her mother picked at her salad with small, sharp stabs
of her silver fork. When she glanced over the polished table, her
mouth was pinched. It was not until the main course had been
served, however, baked chicken breast with lemon sage dressing,
that her mother revealed her problem.

"You had a phone call while you were out,"
she told her daughter, prodding at the stuffed chicken breast on
her plate. "From that cousin of Dean's, Troy." Her mother's gaze
flicked up. "He wanted to remind you about your lunch date on
Tuesday."

Felicia's first reaction was a rush of anger.
Tuesday? Since when had she agreed to have this cursed lunch date
with Troy on Tuesday? The last phone call had been hers, postponing
the thing, and she hadn't given any date as an alternative.
Purposefully. If she put it off long enough, they could both end up
forgetting about it.

But, no. Troy couldn't let well enough alone.
He had to call her mother, of all people, and set another date.

Her mother... Felicia came back to the land
of the living with a bump. Her mother was now gaping at her. She
wore the hurt look, the one she got every time she thought Felicia
was holding out on her, not spilling every little detail of her
life.

"Felicia," her mother asked. "Are you
dating
Troy Singleton?"

Felicia's eyes widened. "No!" She waved her
hands, as if to shoo the notion right out of the room. "No, no,
no."

Unfortunately, this strong denial only
deepened the hurt expression on her mother's face. Felicia realized
she was making it seem more, rather than less, as if romance was
involved. "It's not a date. It's    a business meeting."
Immediately Felicia realized
that
was hardly going to fly,
considering her mother knew Troy Singleton. "That is, I hope it's
going to turn into a business meeting," she quickly amended. She
took a deep breath and forced herself to relax, to slow down, and
to smile. She picked up the salt shaker and drizzled some sodium
over her chicken. "I'm trying to talk him into doing fundraising
for the Boston Family Aid Foundation."

Brilliant, Felicia congratulated herself. For
this was    almost    true.

Her mother tilted her head. "Troy?" She
sounded dubious. She did, after all, know the man.

Felicia picked up her knife and began cutting
her chicken breast. "Yes, Troy. Despite his lack of experience,
he'd be perfect for it. He has everything that's necessary: a good
smile, a silver tongue, and the right connections." She pierced a
piece of chicken with her fork. "He only needs to be persuaded to
bestir himself and do it." Felicia smiled, for that, too, was
almost true.

All this truth appeared to convince Felicia's
mother. The hurt, strained look on her face eased. "Oh, that's
all," she murmured. "Well, good luck to you, my dear. That Troy
seems pretty set in his ways."

"Mm." Felicia set her knife to her chicken
again. Yes, Troy was set in his ways. Or rather, he was set on
getting
his way. Calling her mother...

Felicia didn't know whether she was more
annoyed with Troy, her mother    or herself. Troy had
overstepped the bounds. Her mother
knew
no bounds. And
Felicia    ? Well, Felicia only put up with it all
because she was such a coward. It was so easy to live at home with
a doting mother whose presence effectively prevented any male of
Felicia's acquaintance from thinking she'd fall into bed with him.
She didn't have to dream up excuses for saying no. Her excuse was
live-in.

She glanced across the table at her mother as
a familiar sorrow sifted through her. What a half-life she lived.
And the half she lived was spent so alone sometimes. This lunch
date with Troy, for example. She had no one she could tell the
truth about it. She knew no one who could help her scheme a way out
of the thing.

She might have to go ahead and meet Troy on
Tuesday. Get it over with.

Felicia looked down and impaled a piece of
chicken with her fork. Yes, it was no doubt best to get it over
with    if Troy was going to go around calling her
mother.

###

By the time Kelly arrived back at Dean's
humungous house in the woods, she was more than merely late for
dinner, she'd missed it altogether. That was all right, though.
Dean wasn't there to frown over her sin. He was back at his office,
escaping from her and her inexcusable pushiness.