Marriage & the Mermaid (Hapless Heroes) (37 page)

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Authors: Louise Cusack

Tags: #novel, #love, #street kid, #romantic comedy, #love story, #Fiction, #Romance, #mermaid, #scam, #hapless, #Contemporary Romance, #romcom

BOOK: Marriage & the Mermaid (Hapless Heroes)
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Rand gave them a final wave and then headed back into the empty house, trying not to remember the last thing his niece Roo had said before she’d left: “Thirty–eight isn’t old, Uncle Randy. It’s
ancient.”

He sighed, and really hoped it wasn’t. Because the woman of his dreams — or at least, the woman who’d lived only in his dreams for two decades — was coming back to him tomorrow, and he couldn’t bear the thought of her turning her beautiful nose up at him.

Consequently his stomach was in knots, but for some reason he was also smiling. Because chances were she’d fuck him even if she didn’t like the look of him — she was that kind of girl. But that’s not what Rand had been waiting for all these years. Not a fuck. Not even a spectacular fuck like Venus.

No, the reason he’d never been able to
settle
with anyone else was because as stupid and romantic and pointless as it may turn out to be, he was desperately in love with her — a mermaid he’d known for only a day, a mermaid he’d only ever see one long weekend every twenty years.

This fixation with her had driven him mad for the first ten years, and the only way he’d kept sane was to keep busy, filling up his life with looking out for Betty & Poss and their brood, and running the
Saltwood Heritage Estate
for Baz who’d moved to Hawaii with Wynne and raised a couple of kids of their own.

As the manager of Saltwood, Rand even hosted lunches for Traci Knowles’
Fantasy Reef Hover Tours
where she took punters ‘mermaid spotting’. Tourists loved the idea, but Traci was serious.

Even after all this time, she was determined to get proof, and Rand was just as determined that she wouldn’t. So he hosted her lunches at the estate, which meant that one weekend every year, on the anniversary of Baz’s mother’s death, Saltwood was closed and there was no lunch and subsequently no hover tour.

At the start Traci had been suspicious, sniffing around Saltwood, looking for mermaids, but as each anniversary came and went with no mermaids visiting, Traci must have decided it really was to honor the death of ‘the lady of the house’, and she’d planned her holidays around it. This year she and Liam were in the South of France.

Poss, Betty and the kids were on their way to Cairns, and the only other person in the big wide world who also knew Venus was visiting this weekend — Balthazar Wilson — was on Maui planning his son’s engagement party.

Rand had her all to himself.

No wonder he was grinning as he stepped back into the house, closing the front doors firmly behind him. No tourists for five days, and it would be at least twenty hours before Venus arrived. Rand planned to sleep for some of that time, and try not to stress through the rest.

Okay, no sleep, but he
was
minimizing the stress. Dawn the next day saw him pacing the beach in a restrained fashion, scanning the water, hoping like hell that she made landfall somewhere along the estate coastline instead of the public beach she’d washed up on last time. In any case, he had remote access to cameras set up on the adjacent beaches, and he checked those on his mobile phone every five minutes. A gassed–up hover boat sat below the cliffs if he needed it.

There was nothing to do but wait.

All day.

And every hour he checked the secret cave, in case she’d somehow got past him and… well, he wasn’t sure how he thought she’d get in there, but he checked it anyway, checked his mobile phone, scanned the water, waited.

By five in the afternoon he was sunburnt, dehydrated and starting to entertain the unimaginable and wholly unacceptable idea that she wasn’t coming. And he’d never thought that before. Not once in twenty years. She’d said she was coming back.

He’d believed her.

Then, just as the sun was starting to dip, he saw a sparkle on the water, and he turned, scanning, desperate, because that had to be her. Yet waves continued to rise and fall on the gentle mermaid–less swell, foaming up onto a beach that remained as empty and lonely as it had been at first light. A lump rose in his throat and suddenly the tears he’d been fighting all afternoon stung his eyes.

Rand turned his back on the ocean and wiped at his cheeks. “She
is
coming,” he told himself, because she had to be. But the stinging only grew worse, and wetter, so he distracted himself by wondering if he should check the cave again. Then he glanced at the stone staircase and wondered if he should get some supplies, because if she didn’t arrive before dark he was definitely camping on the beach. She’d need help to walk when she arrived, and —

“Randolph!”

His heart slammed into his ribs, and after that it was all slow motion: his turn, the dipping sun spreading gold across the water, obscuring his vision until he realised she was already on the sand fifty meters away, one hand up waving to him.

Then he ran, skidding to stop on his knees which sprayed sand across her. “Shit! Sorry!” he said before he pulled into his arms and kissed her, hard. Kissed her until his lips hurt and his eyes stung again, he’d been waiting so long.

Finally he pulled back enough to look into her eyes and she grinned at him. “I’ve got my clitoris back,” she said, not looking a day older than the last time he’d seen her, so clearly time moved more slowly where she was.

“So I see,” he whispered, then he couldn’t help saying, “I’ve missed you so much.”

“Yes, yes, but let’s stop talking. I came back to be fucked.”

He laughed at that. “I’ve
really
missed you,” he said, but before he could give her what she so obviously wanted, a tiny head popped up from behind her — an adorable mini–me with honey–blonde hair and enormous blue eyes. “S’da?” she lisped, and Rand felt the air drop out of his lungs.

Venus reached behind herself and pulled the toddler into her arms. “This is Pipi,” she said. “She has your wide forehead.”

“S’da?” the little girl said again, looking at him curiously.

“Yes, that’s your da,” Venus told her, and Rand felt as if his heart would melt.

“I never thought…” He shook his head, then he turned dewy eyes on Venus. “Is she a mermaid too?”

“We’re both human now, for as long as you want us —”

“I want you,” he told her.

“Then you must lock us in when the whirlpool calls us. But after that…”

“You can stay?”

“We can stay.”

Rand shook his head, overwhelmed. And in love. With them both. Then Venus put Pipi carefully into his arms and as his daughter gazed up at him he saw the depths of the ocean in her eyes. Her perfect little eyelashes were like tiny black starfish and her hair smelt salty and sweet and so comforting he wanted to squeeze her against himself and never let her go. But instead he held her gently and said, “Welcome to
Saltwood,
baby girl. Welcome home.”

≈The End≈

I hope you enjoyed Marriage & The Mermaid. If you’d like to read more of the
Hapless Heroes
series they’re available in the Amazon Kindle store. My complete booklist is here
on my Amazon page.

About the author

Louise Cusack lives in a tiny seaside village on the southern tip of the Great Barrier Reef in Australia. She’s a vegetarian ex–animal rights activist, cricket tragic and caffeine addict who mentors other writers when she isn’t writing herself. A Trekkie from way back, she loves all thing science fiction and fantasy, especially if it has a good love story.

Website & blog:
http://louisecusack.com

Twitter:
http://twitter.com/Louise_Cusack

Reviews: If you go back to where you purchased this story and review it, you will earn my eternal gratitude. There is nothing an author wants more than to know that readers care enough to comment. Likewise, all efforts to publicize your enjoyment of my work (
Twitter,
Facebook
etc) will be genuinely appreciated!

Further reading in the
Hapless Heroes
series

Goddess & the Geek (novella)
: Computer whiz Julian Wilde has a month booked at an island hideaway to finish his PhD, but when he arrives, sexy oyster farmer Natasha Barri grabs him thinking he’s a burglar and suddenly asthma isn’t the only thing making Julian breathless. The house has been double booked so they’re forced to share and Julian readily agrees to cook, hoping to use the voodoo potions he’s discovered online to make Tasha fall in love with him. Disaster follows debacle as Julian tries to impress her, and she tries not to kill him.

Read
Goddess & the Geek
to see if Julian can crack open Tasha’s hermit–shell heart and prove he’s the geek for her.

Sex & the Stand In (short story)
: Justin DuBois is in love with his co–worker, but not only does Marianne think he’s too young to be taken seriously, she’s convinced he’s gay. In desperation to win her, Justin recreates her teenage fantasy of a circus, a carnie, and a splash of
Old Spice…

Read
Sex & the Stand In
to find out whether Justin’s crazy plan actually works.

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