Married For Jeremy (Under Fire Book 1) (6 page)

              “How old is he?”

              “I don’t know, probably ten or twelve weeks.”

              “Must be different, having a baby in the house.”

              “Well, he’s a dog, so not quite like a baby. How was your day?”

              “Good. We had a nice afternoon playing cards in the recreation room. I lost every single one, but I had a ball. Then Sue and I worked on that puzzle she’s got set up in her room.”

              “I’m glad you had a good day.”

              “I hear you and Ellen are expecting a baby. Congratulations.”

              Her voice was so calm and serious, James couldn’t believe what he was hearing. How she had found out was beyond him, Ellen wasn’t showing at all yet.

              Anna continued, “I was surprised everything progressed so fast and I’m so happy for you both. I was a little disappointed that you didn’t invite me when you got married though.”

              James looked at her in surprise. Who had told her all this? “Yeah, well, Grandma, we’re not married.”

              “You aren’t?”

              “No.”

              “But Ellen is having a baby?”

              “Yeah.”

              “And you’re going to be its father?”

              James didn’t answer. He wanted to come up with a fancy way to deny it was his baby, but didn’t want to lie.

              “James, I am incredibly disappointed. I had hoped things would work out between you and Ellen, because I feel you are a very good match, but this wasn’t the way it’s supposed to be.”

              “I know, but it just kinda happened.”

              “Things like this don’t just happen James.”

              “Okay, okay, I know everyone seems to think this is my fault, but Ellen was there too. I don’t understand why this is all my problem!”

              “It’s not all your problem, I would say Ellen has it significantly worse than you, she’s got to carry the baby.”

              “So I’m supposed to feel sorry for her?”

              “No, but your job as a man was to protect her and doing what you did, whoever started it, was wrong.”

              “Then what do you want me to do?”

              “Well, if Ellen is willing, I think you two should get married.”

              “Are you kidding me? That’s insane!”

              “It’s the right thing to do. I’m not saying it would be easy, but simply ignoring one another and pretending nothing ever happened is a mistake.”

              “I guess.” James was unconvinced. “I just don’t think I want to do it.”

              “Think about it,” Anna said. “I know that deep down, you still like her, and you could learn to love her if you were willing to work at it.”

              “I don’t know, it seems pretty risky.”

              “It would be, but I think it would be worth it eventually.”

              They sat silently for several moments. James was internally fuming. Not because he was mad at his grandmother, but because he was mad at himself, and her uncanny perception. At least she hadn’t brought God into the conversation.

Anna finally spoke. “So, are you going to let me pet your puppy or not?”

              James couldn’t stop thinking about Ellen that night. He missed her, that was for sure, but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to marry her. When he’d suggested it, he hadn’t actually believed she’d say yes. It was late, and he needed to get ready for bed, but he knew he wasn’t going to sleep.

              His puppy was already curled up in the crate he’d finally found for it in the basement, so he didn’t want to disturb it, by getting it out to play. Feeling lost in his own house, he wandered around wondering what it would be like to have Ellen here. Would she actually want to live here? Would she even consider committing to a marriage? He’d sent her the letter, she’d ignored it. When he saw her at the nursing home, she went another way. There couldn’t be any hope of this working out.

              Ellen was having almost the same thoughts at her apartment. She’d been trying to concentrate on the sitcom playing on TV, but couldn’t. It didn’t help that the secondary character that had just entered the scene had sandy brown hair and grey eyes like James.

              Placing her hand on her stomach, Ellen knew Anna was right. Her baby was going to need a father. She admitted to herself that she was afraid. Afraid of being with James again, but also afraid of having a baby alone. Maybe if she talked to him, they could agree to the marriage, but spend some time getting to know each other before they started living together. She cancelled the thought, that would be silly. She was going to have to jump in with both feet.

Chapter 6

              “Hey Scooter, how was your day?” James opened the crate and scooped the puppy up. It licked his chin as he carried it outside. “You’re such a good boy.” He set it on the grass beside the front porch. He’d found himself talking to his dog a lot, it was good therapy.

              He’d decided to wait for Ellen to make the first move. If she wanted him back, she was going to have to ask. In the likely event she never wanted to see him again, he’d wait until he found a nice, strong-minded girl that wouldn’t mind his lifestyle. He might not even tell her about the baby.

              When he returned to the house, the message light was blinking. James put out a bowl of food for Scooter, then crossed the kitchen to the phone. “James, it’s Ellen. I want to talk to you. I think we should get married, but there’s three conditions. One, you understand this is for the baby not you, two, I keep my job and my apartment for awhile, and three, we don’t share a room until I say so. I’m going to be home tonight if you want to come talk. I’d like to work something out between us.” Ellen’s voice ended and the machine shut off. James leaned against the counter. It might be worth a shot. If he could show her he cared about her, she’d likely melt and they’d have a fine relationship, and he’d get to be a father.

              When Scooter finished eating, James put him back in his crate and slipped into his bedroom. Changing into clean jeans and sport shirt, then combing his hair he headed for the door.

              His stomach was in a knot by the time he reached the apartment building. He found her buzzer number and pushed the button.

              “Hello?”

              “Hey, it’s James.”

              “Com’on up.” Her voice didn’t sound happy to see him.

              James took the stairs up to the fifth floor, needing to work off some of his nervous energy before he saw her. Too soon he was knocking on her door.

              “Com’on in,” she said flatly.

              James walked through the door.

              “I guess you got my message?”

              “Yeah.”

              “What do you think?”

              “I don’t know, is this really what you want?”

              “I want our baby to have a good life and I know it needs both of us. I just hate the fact of shipping it back and forth between us so I suppose we’re going to have to make a go of living in the same house.”

              “So do you want to move in with me?”

              “Not without being married. I already made one mistake, I don’t want to make another.”

              “I get that,” James agreed. “Can we sit down and talk about this?”

              “Yeah, com’on in the kitchen.”

              James took his boots off and followed her across the apartment.

              “I don’t drink coffee, but I’ll make you some hot chocolate if you want?”

              “That would be great,” James said with smile.

              “Sit down, it’ll just be a minute.” She got out a kettle and filled it with water, then plugged it into an outlet on the counter.

              “This is a nice place.”

              “I know. That’s why I don’t want to give it up right away. If we end up needing some space, it might be a good thing to have.”

              “You’re probably right,” James agreed. “Listen, I’m as unsure about this as you are, but there’s gotta be some way we can make it work.”

              “Yeah, I guess.” Ellen placed a mug of hot chocolate in front of him, then sat down with her own. “You’re okay with, well, you know?”

              James nodded. “I figure once we’re together and know each other better, we’ll be more ready.”

              “So when do you want to finalize this deal?”

              “What timeframe are you think about? Next week? Next month? Longer than that?”

              “If we don’t do it soon, I’m going to lose my nerve. I’m working tomorrow and the day after, but anytime after that will work.”

              “Okay, Friday it is.” James took a sip of hot chocolate.

              James picked her up Friday morning and they headed into the next town to the courthouse. He could hardly believe it was happening, but soon, he was a married man. They headed back to Ellen’s apartment to pick up some of her things, then drove back to the house they were about to call home.

              “Why don’t you get the door, I’ll carry some of this stuff,” James suggested.

              “All right,” Ellen agreed, walking ahead of him to open the door.

              “I guess this will have to be your room,” James said, setting the items down and shoving a door open. “I know you don’t want to be in my room and the master bedroom kinda got used for storage so it’s a mess. You can move in there later if you want.”             

              “This is fine.” Ellen reached for the lightswitch, then became silent.

              James glanced around the room and realized her problem. He rarely came in here and hadn’t thought to check if the room was actually clean. By the dust and cobwebs, it was in need of a little work. “Maybe you’d better have my room for tonight and I’ll sleep here.”

              Ellen took a deep breath. “It’s okay. If you get me a broom and some rags, this will be just fine.”

              James got her the supplies and offered to help, but she wanted to do it on her own so he told her he’d be outside with the pup and to call if she needed something. When he came back in, her door was shut, so he didn’t disturb her.

              A few hours passed, and he decided he’d better check on her. When he reached up to knock on her door, he heard muffled sobs. “Ellen?” When she didn’t answer, he pushed the door open. She was curled up on the bed, hugging a pillow. “Ellen?” He tried again.

              “What?” She sniffed and sat up, trying to look like she was fine.

              “I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I made some supper if you want it.”

              “I’m not really hungry but maybe later.”

              “Okay.” Reluctantly, he left her and returned to the kitchen. Glancing up at the clock he realized it had been almost eight hours. Eight hours and already they were both having second thoughts.

              James had never considered himself a morning person, but he had thought he was an early riser until he started living with Ellen. Every morning so far, he’d found her sitting at the kitchen table with some kind of fruit juice when he got up.

              “Can’t you get dressed before you come out here?” Ellen asked disdainfully.

              “It’s my house.” James shot back. He had a habit of wandering out to the kitchen in his pyjama pants, then getting dressed after he’d had coffee.

              “Yeah, but I live here so put some clothes on before you come out here.”

              “Fine.” James stomped back to his room and found jeans and a t-shirt. It just didn’t make any sense to get dressed before breakfast. “Is this better?” he asked when he came back into the kitchen.

              “Yes.” Ellen turned a page in the morning paper. “You want a piece of this?” She held up a section of the paper.              

              James shook his head. “I’m good.” It was Ellen’s newspaper subscription anyway. He never took the time to read the paper. “I’m going to make some breakfast, you want anything?”

              “I think I’ll stick with some juice for now, I’ll eat later.”

              She was especially pale and James was suddenly concerned. “Is it always like this?”

              “What?”

              “Mornings.”

              “I thought it was going away, but the last few days have been pretty rough.”

              “That sucks, I hope it goes away soon.”

              “Me too.”

              “Are you ready for bed?” Ellen asked Anna a few weeks later.

              “Yes,” Anna closed her Bible and set it on the table beside the bed.

              “You ready your Bible every night don’t you?”

              “Yes, I like to spend some time with Jesus before bed.”

              “You know, watching you, I think I’m almost ready to believe in this Jesus.” Ellen fluffed up Anna’s pillow.

              “Why is that?”

              “Well, you have peace, and I think that’s why. I just wonder why when James was raised by you, that he doesn’t believe like you.”

              “God allows us to make our own choices, unfortunately, James hasn’t chosen Jesus.”

              “I started going to a different church.”

              “You did, why is that?”              

              “I just have to wonder if going to mass is really the right thing to do. I thought it might not hurt to go to the church down the street a few times. The people are friendly, and they talk about Jesus a lot. I’m still not sure about the whole thing though.”

              “Keep listening, and searching Ellen. God will reveal Himself to you if you ask,” Anna said with a smile.

              “James, I hate the way you act!” Ellen gripped the plate in her hand tighter.

              “Yeah, well sometimes I don’t care for your habits either.” James crossed his arms across his chest. He didn’t feel like arguing, but if she was going to pick fights, he’d have to defend himself.

              “What’s that supposed to mean?”

              “Well, you moved in here. You can’t force stuff on me.”

              “All I asked was that you wash the dishes before I got home.”

              “There were hardly any dishes,” James said flatly.

              “Which is my point. It would’ve taken you five minutes, but you don’t have the decency to care.”

              “I’ll try to respect your wishes, but this is my house.”

              “Your house huh?” Ellen stomped her foot. “Well then, I’ll spend the night in town. Actually I’ll stay there until you decide to be reasonable.” She stomped to her room and burst back out moments later, suitcase packed. James stayed quiet. If she was going to be a child, fine.

              About an hour after his wife had stormed out, James realized what had really happened. Maybe she’d never come back. Then he’d be back to where he’d started, only now he was married to her so they couldn’t just break up privately. He sighed and flopped onto the couch. Scooter came over and nosed his knee. “Hey buddy.” James held out his hand and the dog moved closer. James scratched behind the dog’s ears. “Did I do the wrong thing?”

              James made himself some supper, but wasn’t hungry enough to eat much of it. Maybe a drive would help. Putting Scooter into his crate with a couple of dog treats, James headed outside to his truck. Heading north on a main road, he had a hard time focusing on the road. Why did she have to be so unpredictable? The littlest thing got her upset and screaming at him. He’d mentioned it to Roy during one of their quiet moments together and Roy had told him it could be the pregnancy, but James didn’t agree. Sure, he’d cut her some slack if she wanted to be emotional, or cry a lot, but he wasn’t about to have her run his life.

              James rolled the window down to breathe some of the fresh spring air. It had been far too dry. They needed rain soon or who knew what would happen. He stopped at the side of the road and leaned his head against the steering wheel. He knew what his Grandma would say at a time like this. She’d remind him not to let the sun go down on his anger and to remember fights went two ways. Then she’d remind him how much God loved him and that he should love others. He did love Ellen, he thought. She was just so hard to love sometimes. The wind picked up and rustled through the dry leaves and grass. Any spark at all and there was going to be a serious disaster.

              Straightening up, he sniffed the air, then saw the small cloud of smoke in the distance. He swore, knowing what he was likely to find at the source and put his truck into gear.

              The grass fire already spanned at half an acre and the wind had begun to carry sparks to other areas of the field and only fanned the flames in their quick upward spread. James radioed Dispatch, asking for a mutual aid response knowing they were better to stand trucks down than to have a full-fledged wildfire on their hands.

              After the first few hours as a free woman, Ellen knew she had to go back. Apart from being a little dusty in places, her apartment hadn’t changed, but it wasn’t much compared to the log house she’d started living in. She sank down onto the couch and flipped on the TV, hoping to catch some of the evening news. She wasn’t prepared for what she saw.

              Fuelled by the strong winds, a wildfire raged, several miles north of town. It had already consumed hectares of crop land and bush, and was heading into the next county. Firefighters on scene could do little but watch and hope the wind didn’t change and drive the fire into residential territory.