Meadow Perkins, Trusty Sidekick (3 page)

A couple of people stood around the sculptures discussing them. “The curves are so organic. This one looks like it just rose up out of the earth.”

I recognized the sculpture teacher bragging on my grandfather’s work. I slid behind her into the dark like a ghost then sat down in a lounge chair on the far side of the pool. Trees and darkness hid me from view. Behind the trees, a winding path led to the studio which was built to look like a barn. My grandfather had also built it years ago and it had been his studio as well. It was a beautiful building full of windows. The studio was even more carefully planned out than the house. For years, Mom had worked downstairs and Granddad had been upstairs.

I froze when I heard Mr. Egan’s voice from right behind the trees. He said something about “perfect light.” I hunkered down in my chair and tried really hard to be invisible. My heart thumped in my chest and I put my hand over it as though that would slow it down. “I just wish we had that kind of light in the painting studio at HSA.” After I saw him walk in the house and in the opposite direction of where my mother still chatted up Isla’s dad, I breathed a sigh of relief.

I watched the party from the safety of the lounge chair. Twist leaned against the wall by the windows. She took her phone out of her clutch, checked it and frowned, tucking it back in her purse.

Isla pointed at a painting on the wall, gesturing, like she got it. My mom nodded thoughtfully, clearly impressed by her observation.

I didn’t see Alejandro or Emilia anywhere. Despite the chill in the air, I stayed curled up in the lounge chair on the edge of the party. Like always.

After a bit, I let my eyes close and listened to the laughter and music spilling out of the house. I said another little prayer that Mr. Egan and my mom wouldn’t cross paths.

My eyes popped open when I heard footsteps coming down the stone path from the studio. Isla emerged from the tree-lined path, pulling her hair into a loose ponytail and letting it flop over her shoulder. She smiled slightly and waved. I was happy to note that it was kind of a dorky wave. 

“Can I sit?” she asked as she got closer.

“Sure,” I said and motioned her over.

“Long time,” she said. The pool was lit from the inside and cast a blue/green glow over her.

“Yup.”

“So what’s it like now?” she asked. 

“What’s what like?”

“Is it different? What’s it like to be seventeen here?”

I felt like an idiot. She was totally asking the wrong person.

“Umm,” I said, “I don’t know really.”

“So, like, you don’t know where the party is tonight?” She sounded a little disappointed, I could tell.

“Not really.” I shrugged. “I’m not really much of a party person.”
Especially this summer.  

“Well, we’ll just have to find out.” Her smile lit up the dark.

“So welcome back,” I said. “I’m sorry that I can’t be your social ‘in.’”

Isla laughed. “It’s okay. We should hang.”

“Yeah, okay,” I said. And I actually meant it. 

“Give me your phone.”

I gave her my phone and she programmed her number in. My heart swelled as I had a vision of Isla and I at the beach, shopping, laughing at an inside joke, being my new best friend. Maybe she was a nice person. That would be a nice change.

“I better go. Dad is probably wondering where I’ve been,” she said, glancing inside where her dad was talking to my mom.

My mom was practically tinkling she was so tipsy. It was a Hobart fundraising tradition. Isla hadn’t yet made a move to go. I guessed I should try to say something less stupid so she wouldn’t leave thinking I was a weirdo. 

“Want to come over tomorrow?” I asked. “If it’s nice, we can swim.”

“Yeah, sure,” she said and smiled.

“Great. How’s afternoon? Like two?”

She nodded and then stood up and walked toward the house. Once inside, Isla found her dad and they drifted off out of my line of sight.

I stayed put on the lounge chair just watching the party through the window. Slowly, the crowd dissipated and when the last few people were leaving, I stood up and snuck through the back door to my room. 

Twist lay sprawled on my bed with her arm slung across her face when I got to my bedroom. 

“Uuhhnnggg,” she said.

“Long night?” I asked.

“Yes, and where the heck have you been?” Twist uncovered her eyes and squinted at me, eyeliner smudged around her eyes.

“Here and there,” I said. “Outside mostly.” 

“That’s not fair. Mom’s being really annoying out there.”

“What’s she doing?” I sat down on the window seat and kicked off my shoes.

“She was flirting with the new neighbor. It was so embarrassing,” Twist said.

“I saw. Are you gonna sleep in my bed? If you are, I’m sleeping in the loft.” I rifled through the clothes I’d tossed into the closet when I was “cleaning” my room earlier.

“I’m already asleep, basically, but you can sleep with me,” she said and rolled over onto her stomach.

“No way, dude. You sleep like you are dead and it makes me nervous.” 

Twist was already asleep and still wearing her dress. I tiptoed around the room turning off lamps and covering her up with a blanket. My favorite leggings appeared underneath a throw pillow on the loveseat.

I put on an old, ratty UC Berkeley T-shirt. Both of my parents had gone there and my grandfather taught there. My dad bought me a lot of stuff with UC Berkeley plastered all over it.

Mom appeared at the door with a champagne twinkle in her eye. “Hi, doll. You going to bed?”

“Yeah.”

“Mr. Egan asked about you. He asked if you were okay and he said he wanted to talk.”

I froze. “Uh. Talk about what?” I squeaked.

“He didn’t say. You don’t know what he was talking about?” Mom put her arm around me.

“Nope.”

“I’ll call him next week.”

Caught
! I felt like a tiny fish cornered by a shark. “No I’m sure it’s fine. I just got a little upset on the last day of school . . . no big deal. You don’t need to call,” I blurted, not making eye contact with her.

Mom frowned a little. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. Totally sure.” I didn’t think I could handle mom hearing the news that I was a hack. “I don’t want to even think about school this summer.”

“Okay,” she said, clearly not convinced. “We’ll talk about it later.”

Mom waved goodnight and wobbled her way down the hall. The light in the main room went off and I fell back against the wall. I closed my eyes tightly as thoughts raced through my head.
Disaster. I’m a disappointment to my whole family. What am I gonna do? Is there any way I can transfer without Mom even knowing? Hahahaha. Nope.

Heaving a sigh, I turned and climbed up the ladder to the loft and flopped down onto the mattress that took up most of the space. The loft was my favorite place in the house but I got little comfort from it, even from the books lining the shelves on either side of the bed. I stared at the shadows passing over the moon through the skylight, unable to sleep.

“I’m sorry, Granddad,” I whispered.

Chapter 3

Crash. Bang.

The sounds of someone slamming cabinet doors jerked me out of my sleep. With a yawn, I rolled over and peeped through the curtain.

Bang. Bang. Bang.
Mom slammed every single cabinet door while she tried to make coffee. She scratched her blond hair leaving it rumpled before shuffling to the dishwasher and pulling out her favorite mug with a scowl. She’s not a morning person.  

I closed the curtain and settled back into bed. No reason to jump up on a Sunday morning in the summer. Besides, Mom needed some time before she would be a fit companion.

My phone lay on the pillow next to me. I checked but no messages, no texts, no nothing. Nothing interesting on any social media platform. Just waterfalls, kittens, and sunsets . . .
carpe diem
,
blah, blah, blah
. 

Instagram offered a little more. Alejandro had posted some stylishly edited photos from last night. I was surprised to see that one of them was of my silhouette next to the pool. My heart thumped. Why was he posting photos of me? It was a pretty cool-looking picture. And I doubted anyone would know that the shadow by the pool was me if they didn’t know, you know? I felt a little pittery inside. Probably he just thought it looked artistic. It’s not as if he captioned it “My one true love, Meadow.” In the deep, mean recesses of my heart, I hoped that Emilia saw it and was jealous.

Later, after Twist had vacated my room and gone home, I stood in my room in front of the mirror, trying to look effortless, cool, and chic. So far, I just looked oddly put together.

“God. I look stupid.” I took my hair down out of the ponytail and tried it loose. Loose just looked greasy even though I’d washed it that morning. Stupid teenager hair. I put it back up and managed to make it look halfway like my goal which was “I don’t care and I just threw it up and it looks great” cool. But when I checked it from the back, it turned out it really only just looked crappy. Finally, I just braided it and swung it over my shoulder.

If only every step of my getting ready didn’t require so much work. I finally chose a black one-piece (well, all of my bathing suits were black) with a halter. I had more confidence that the structure of the bust would actually keep my bust inside my suit.

I returned to the closet and searched for the perfect cover-up.

Rummaging through piles of clothes on the floor, I got discouraged. “It shouldn’t look like I’m trying to hide something and shouldn’t be an outfit, more of a ‘this old thing?’” I tried old button-up shirt. “Better, sort of.”

Knock, knock
. My mom’s signature police-style banging on the door.

“Yeah?” I tried to pull on jogging pants while stepping out of the closet. I tripped just as the door burst open.

“Meadow! Are you okay? I’m heading out to brunch and a matinee. Do you want to go? It’s experimental.”

I pulled my pants the rest of the way up and snapped the elastic against my waist. Ouch. “Um, no. I think maybe Isla is coming over.” I averted my eyes so I didn’t have to see Mom’s look of sheer delight. 

“How lovely!” she beamed, thrilled. “Do you need any money? Are you going out somewhere?”  

“We are just going swimming,” I said, gesturing toward the pile of bathing suits on the bed.

“Well, I’ll leave some pizza money just in case.”

“Thanks. When are you coming home?” 

Mom slipped a pair of dangly, turquoise earrings in her ears and checked her lipstick in my mirror. “After the show, I’m meeting Joseph at Café Kindness to go over a few business things and Graciella is having a wine and cheese reception tonight. I’ll be in and out probably. But don’t expect me until late.” She stepped over the piles of clothes in my floor until she reached me and kissed my hair. “Be good.” And she was gone.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m always good,” I said to the closed door.

Mom was like that. Very busy, important, and abrupt. She hadn’t always been like that but she hadn’t always owned the most popular gallery in Berkeley either. And she was Twist’s manager. I obviously didn’t need a manager to manage my lack of talent. I felt a little sorry for Twist. Mom was completely overbearing about 80% of the time and the other 20% she was gone. I had no idea who Joseph and Graciella were, none at all. 

I heard the front door slam. That was how she always arrived and left, with a slam and a bang.

I decided to leave the old oxford shirt on, but switched out the jogging pants for a pair of shorts and swept piles of discarded clothes into the closet. I wasn’t sure if Isla would be in my room but she definitely didn’t need to see my closet.

I paced around the room nervous about my first friend date.
And now we will hang out and see if we can tolerate each other.
I mean, it’s really the same principle, isn’t it? I hate making new friends. It’s part of why I have been such a raging success in high school. I come off really awkward and odd before I get to know people. Emilia told me that. I assume it’s true. 

My room was decent. I checked my watch, only 11:00 a.m. I was early, as per usual. I was always really early for things. My mom was always running late, so was Twist. When I struggled to get them somewhere earlyish, they said, “Oh we are on Meadow time.” Ha-ha.

I poked around on Instagram until I couldn’t stand seeing pictures of people having awesome summers and going to beach parties any longer.

After an eternity, Isla showed up looking impossibly cool. I always think I look great until I’m standing next to someone that actually looks really great, and then I feel super frumpy. Every single time. I frumpily led Isla through the house and out to the pool. It was a little bit chilly and the pool was freezing. I’d brought out some huge, plush beach towels that my mom always made sure we have around. I handed one to Isla who had taken her white, slouchy V-neck cotton shirt and shorts off to reveal a super-cute bikini, of course. The super-small kind. 

“Sorry the weather isn’t better,” I said. 

“It’s okay.” Isla smiled. “I don’t mind.”

“Sorry, the water isn’t heated either.” I couldn’t think of anything else to say.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize for everything, you know.” Isla sat on the edge and swung her feet into the water.

“Okay. I’ll try not to.” I had to bite my tongue not to add a “sorry.” I took my shirt and shorts off, quickly tossed them to the side and wrapped up in a towel, pretending I was cold.

“Are you having a good summer?” she asked.

“Um. Sort of, I guess.”
If you call sitting in the house all day and being a total nerd with zero friends to do anything fun with good.

“Can I ask you something?” Isla asked, and I looked up, startled and nervous about what it could be.

“Are you still friends with Emilia?” Isla quickly lowered herself into the pool. It was cold and I always spent about 20 minutes getting in, the complete opposite of Isla. There were two kinds of people, I guess—those who get in quickly and those who drag it out.

“Not really,” I answered truthfully. “She kind of humiliated me in front of a bunch of people.”

“What did she do?” She knit her brows in concern.

“She just overheard a conversation I had with a teacher and then repeated it to the whole school.” I didn’t go into further detail. 

“She was a jerk when we were twelve years old and she’s still one now! People like that never change.” She shrugged.  

“Truth. I really hope there aren’t a ton more people out there like Emilia. The earth will get super confused about who it’s supposed to revolve around.”

Isla laughed and dove underwater.

The ice had kind of broken and I felt like I could be more myself. I mean, this person used to be my best friend. Maybe it was actually possible that we still had stuff in common and we could be best friends again, or at least good friends. The Isla I remembered was free and hilarious and impulsive. I was relieved to think that maybe people like that didn’t really change either.

Isla came up for air. “You’re still really funny. I always liked that about you.”

She got out of the pool and we sat for a long time just catching up. Isla had been living in New Mexico with her father. She usually spent the summers with her mother but not this summer. She didn’t say why, but she seemed a little funny about it, and sad to have left Santa Fe.

“Why did you guys move back?” I asked.

Isla stared out over the water. “My dad got a job offer. He’s the new head of the English department at UC Berkeley.”

“Where are you going to school?”

“My dad is a big believer in public school.”

The sun peeped out from behind the clouds.

We were both quiet for a while. I nearly fell asleep and was startled when Isla suddenly asked, “So you really don’t know what people do around here for fun?”

“I guess I don’t hang out with anyone from school. They think I’m a snob.” It was true. I’d heard a bunch of people say it. Snobby is not the same as super shy. 

“Don’t you go anywhere with Emilia?”

“Not lately.”

Isla’s eyes widened slightly. “Enough about Emilia. Do you have a boyfriend?”

Uh-oh. If I told her the truth, which was that I hadn’t had a boyfriend since I was in 8
th
grade, and that didn’t really count, then she might go running and screaming away to find a friend that wasn’t so lame. “No.”

“Why not?” she asked.

“I don’t know. It just never seems to work out that way for me.”

“But you like Alejandro!” she accused. 

“How can you know that?” I practically screeched.

“I saw how you looked at him last night!”

I let my head fall back on the chair and groaned.

“But I could never have him,” I protested.

“Why not?”

“He’s with Emilia! They’ve been together forever. Sh-She’s my friend!” I stuttered on the last part.

“Oh no she’s not!” Isla was waving her hands at me now. “You hate her! She is insane and demanding and not what a friend is supposed to be. Trust me, you don’t like her and she is not your friend. And are they going to be together forever and ever? Is there a picket fence in their future? It’s very doubtful.”

I laughed. Everything she said was completely true, I just hadn’t been able to say it. I laughed harder. 

“What?”

I couldn’t answer her but kept giggling.

Isla just looked at me and shook her head.

When I finally stopped, she stood up and faced me, her hands on her hips. “You deserve better than that. Everyone does. Now we just have to figure out what we are going to do about it.”

“What do you mean? What can we do about Emilia?”

She stood up and stared down at me with her hands on her hips. “No, dummy. About the fact that you are nearly 17 years old and you have zero social life!”

“Oh no! My innocence will be lost!”

“Please.” She rolled her eyes.

Later, we sat at the kitchen table eating pizza when my phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my pocket expecting it to be Twist or one of my parents. 

I must have gasped because Isla scooted her chair over to try and see. “What? Who is it?”

“Alejandro.”

“WHAAAAT?” she screamed in my ear. “What does he want?”

I opened text.

Hey its Alejandro. Want 2 go check out a band 2nite?

I shrieked.

“Yes, you do! Yes! YES!” Isla grabbed my arm and jumped up and down. 

“Don’t get so excited! He’s taken,” I said, as much to myself as to her.

“Oh, whatever! Maybe he’s gonna break up with her! Maybe he already did!”

I tried to be textually composed. I didn’t want to sound like a big texting dork, which I was and would likely remain since I used correct grammar and spelling in every text.

Sure. Details?
I finally texted back. “Wait! My mom is not gonna let me go if I’m not going with a friend. A friend that’s a girl, I mean. I just got a whole speech about it.”

Isla groaned. “Really? Why not?”

“Girls have to stick together and watch out for one another to avoid being drugged, etcetera.”

“So?”

“What about you?”

“Sure. I’m not busy.”

Can Isla come?
I doubted I could do this without some support.

We waited in silence for the next five minutes. I kept checking to see if somehow a ninja-like text had gotten by me in the one second I looked away from the screen. What if I’d turned the ringer off somehow? No, still full volume.

After two eternities, my phone dinged again.

Sure. Meet me at 8 at the shop
.

Isla drew a sharp intake of breath. “Oh my God, we have so much to do,” she said.

“What? It’s like four-thirty.” I couldn’t imagine what we would do for three hours.

I let my head fall forward onto the table with a thud. “Uuuugggh.” I lifted it up to say, “I just hate texting in these situations. There is no information! I can’t try to read the inflection in his voice or ask if Emilia is coming or even know what’s going on.” Whine.

“Yeah, but why would he have texted you to go to a party? Emilia was being such a bitch last night anyway. I think they are breaking up,” Isla said.

“Nope! Not way,” I protested.

After Isla helped me pick out an outfit, she went home to get ready. I had no doubts that whatever outfit she would pick out for herself would automatically be way better than mine. 

I paced around the house while I waited. Mom really was in and out. She finally left for the wine and cheese reception. I don’t know how she maintains the pace. It’s very depressing to think that my mother has a more hopping social life than me.