Meadowlarks (32 page)

             
Of course Maria and Kelsey know a cake maker; they probably know a balloon and streamer maker, too. I bet they've got a Rolodex for party planning.

             
“Cheesecake?” I smirk, and she giggles. It’s the most beautiful sound, and I haven't heard it all day. It warms my blood, and my heart finally recovers from the trauma of earlier and starts functioning again.

             
“What about carrot cake with cream cheese icing? Full of raisins and walnuts?”

             
She had me at cake; I just don't tell her. I'm a man. I don't care what kind it is; I'll eat it.               “Sounds perfect.”

             
“Okay! Carrot cake it is.” She writes down in her wedding binder and quickly closes it when she notices I'm leaning over the table to take a peek at what's in there. So much for finding anything else out.

             
I yawn and sigh loudly.

             
“Tired?”

             
“Yeah, a little.”

             
“Let's go to bed, babe.” She reaches for my hand, and we head upstairs. Rex and Luca follow us up and lay on the floor at the foot of the bed. They say dogs can sense emotion; maybe they know something's up, and they want to be close to her.

             
She gets as close as she can to me, and I wrap my arms around her. I nuzzle into the back of her neck and breathe in the familiar scent of green apples. I can feel her body relax as she falls asleep.

I'm tired, but I can't sleep. I stare at the walls, the door, the ceiling, those twenty-seven knots again, the clock, the windows, my hand—anything to bore me enough to sleep. But it doesn't happen. I'm restless, and I try not to wake her up by fidgeting.

              The last time I look at the clock, it's almost five in the morning. Great, I'm going to be dead on my feet in the morning for work. I hope the guys are ready to carry me around; I don't do well on fumes.

*
              *              *

             
I'm awake when the sun rises; it was absolute torture all night long not being able to close my eyes and keep them shut. I wanted to sleep so badly, but I just couldn't. My mind was racing, thinking about everything that's happened, everything that could happen in the future and how much I would lose it if she was hurt again.

             
The dogs whine at the door. I slowly climb out of bed, and they follow me downstairs so I can let them outside. I have to scold them when they bark at the other animals, even though they don't listen. I wonder why dogs do that; it's not like they're new cows, or chickens or horses. They're the same ones they see every day, yet they still have to howl at them.

Addison sleeps until almost two in the afternoon, which is very unlike her. She obviously needs it, and I even manage to keep Alex out of the house all morning. He kept wanting to go and check on her, even though I told him she was sleeping.

              “Hi, guys.” She smiles, holding four bottles of beer in her hands. “Thought you might wanna take a break.”

             
“Hey, love. How are you feeling?” I walk over to her and kiss her warm cheek. It still has lines on it from lying on the pillow; she must have just woken up.

             
“Good, actually. I feel refreshed.” She hands each of us a bottle and uses my t-shirt that she's wearing to crack the cap off hers. “So what are you up to?”

             
“Just tearing down part of this wall. It’s starting to rot, and we need to replace it before it collapses.” Jeremiah kicks the bottom of the rotted wood on a big section of one of the barn walls.

             
“Sounds like fun,” she says. “Need any help?”

             
Alex drops his jaw, Jeremiah furrows his eyebrows, and I grin.

             
“You wanna help?”

             
“Well, yeah. So what?” She looks at all of us like it's the nineteenth century and she's telling us she wants to vote or something.               “Mr. O'Brien called and asked how much time I wanted off. I said just a few days.” She takes a sip and wipes a little bit off her mouth that escaped her lips.

The
sight makes me harden slightly.

“So, I thought I could help around here and keep myself busy.”

              “Well, you could. Or...” I pull out my phone. “I could call Lynn and ask her if she can bring someone over today instead of waiting until the weekend.”

             
Yeah, that worked. Rotted barn boards forgotten, she squeals in excitement. The idea of having her new little colt brings her eyes to life.               “Really? Thank you, babe!”

             
Lynn loads up the mare and colt and is at the house within a few hours.

             
“He looks like he's grown so much in a week!” Addison holds her hands together under her chin in excitement as Lynn leads him off the trailer. The mare whinnies for him and stamps her hoof down.

             
“Oh, calm down there, Barbara. He'll be just fine without ya,” Lynn calls into the trailer as if the mare can understand her. “Mares.” She smirks and hands Addison the lead rope.

             
“Thank you so much! I love him already.” She rubs his neck and her fingers flow through his mane. “Hi, my little guy.”

             
In a sectioned off part of the pasture she leads her new colt around; he follows her almost like a dog. He's one of the calmest I've ever seen at this age, and I'm impressed with Lynn's progress. The other horses notice him right away, and they all end up standing at the fence that divides him from them. They whinny, and he perks up and whinnies back.

             
“Should I let him go?” she calls to me.

             
“Yeah, he'll be fine.” I'm standing at the gate with the guys; she unclasps the lead rope and stands back to let him go. He trots over to the others, keeping his distance, but leaning in just close enough to smell them. Mischief rears, and it scares him. He turns and runs a few feet, then stops and looks back. He's not ready to be in with them yet. Maybe I'll put one of the other mares in there with him for now so he's not alone.

             
After we finish tearing as much wood out as we can, the guys go home, and Addison and I drive into town to Zeke's feed store. She's going to get her colt some new goodies; that's what she called them. My terms would be halter, brush, feed bucket—you know, all the things I already have around the farm. But she insists that he needs all brand new and all his own.

             
“Well, hey there, you two.” Zeke's behind the counter, rolling coin when we walk in. “I haven't seen you in a while!”

             
“Hey, Zeke. How's it going?”

             
He ignores me.

             
“Miss Cole, how's that big mally of yours? You haven't come in to get any treats lately.”

             
I smirk and shake my head. This is the usual around other men; I'm nobody, and she's the only person in the room.

             
“Hi, Zeke. Luca's good.” She smiles. “I know; I've been so busy with work.”

             
“Well, what can I help you with today?”

             
“Blaine got me my own colt for my birthday!” She beams and wraps her arm around my waist.

             
Hmm, there ya go, Zeke, my friend. Eat your fuckin’ heart out.

             
“Well, Blackstock. That was awful good of you.”

             
“I'll need a new halter and lead rope...” She trails off and wanders down an aisle. I stand at the counter, and we both watch her.

             
“Never thought that was gonna happen, huh, buddy?” He taps my arm with the back of his hand.

“What?”

              “That girl.” He grins, and it makes me uncomfortable. “Remember that day? Oh, man. We were all gawkin' like horny kids.”

             
“All right, all right.” I cross my arms and refrain from telling him to fuck off.

             
She picks out royal blue everything, and I mean
everything
. Whatever a horse could possibly need at this stage in his life, she's put it all on the counter.

             
“Are you sure you got it all? I saw a few more shelves you didn't clear in there.” I smirk as we climb into my truck.

             
“Hey! It's not that much.” She turns and looks into the back seat at the bags. “Okay, maybe I went a little overboard. But I couldn't help it…Just think how much I'll spend when we have actual children to buy for.”

             
I look over at her, and she smiles. “Should I get the boys to start building an addition to the house?”

             
“You just might have to do that!” She laughs and turns up the radio.

             
Her moods have been so good since the Reid incident. Too good, even. I'm afraid it all might collapse like a house of cards, and that this is a front she's putting up so I don't worry about how she's really feeling.

             
As it inches closer and closer to our wedding, Addison slowly transforms back into the girl I met almost a year ago. I was right about her enthusiasm being too good to be true, though. She had a breakdown while we were in bed a few nights ago. I woke up to the sound of her sobbing, and I jumped up to turn on a light.

             
“Baby? What's the matter?” I held her in my arms and stroked her hair.

             
She melted into my body, her not saying anything was agonizing to me, but I knew she needed to just let go. Eventually she opened up and said she just felt like crying. She's been overwhelmed, and it just started flowing like a burst dam. Since that night, she's been wonderful. All the poison released from her body, and she's recovered in her own way, I guess.

             
Riley moved a few belongings to Wyoming; she's been staying with Alex and her son, Isaac, in Jeremiah's house. When she found out about what happened with Reid, she almost marched down to the jail herself.

             
“If I ever see that dick, I'll crush his balls.” She held up her hand and tightly gripped the air. I think Jer, Alex and I all felt that one. “Cover your ears, baby,” she said to her son.

Isaac smirk
ed at his mother and covered his ears with his hands.

             
Addison went back to work after a week, and Ruth called to tell me she's been having great days. The Human Resources team would like her to talk to a counsellor, probably so she doesn't have a breakdown at work. She agreed and told me that she speaks to a kind woman at work.

             
She makes it an effort with her colt every night after work. She asks for my help sometimes, but other than when she asks, I don't interfere.

             
“Are you ever going to name him?” I joke while I bend down to pick up his hooves, checking each one.

             
“Well, yeah. I was thinking of a few names.”

             
              “Like what?”

             
“How about...” She stands back and looks at him, like she's done about a million times since his arrival. “Jax.”

             
“Jax?”

             
“Yeah, he looks like a Jax.”

             
I have no idea what a Jax looks like, but what my baby wants, my baby gets.               “Good, I'll get Lynn to start on his papers.”

This will be a little piece of ownership for Addison, which she'll probably frame and hang
somewhere in the house proudly.

“You'll need to think of a registration name for him too.”

              “Oh, really? It took me forever just to come up with three letters!”

             
“Well, you want to show him off someday, right?”

             
“Yeah.” She smiles and hugs me.

             
I lean in and pick her up so she's lifted above my head.               “Do you know how lucky I am to have you? You are everything to me.”

             
She stares down at me with those big blue eyes, and her long red curls fall over my shoulders. “You are everything to me too, handsome.”

             
“I finished my vows last night.”               I slowly stand her back on the ground, but she doesn't take her hands off me. She takes off my hat and puts it on her head, scruffs my unruly hair with her hand.

             
“You did? When?”