Memories (7 page)

 The man beside Traycee spoke up. "That's not a problem. I have to ride back into Manhattan, too. I'll be happy to escort Traycee back to her hotel."

 Traycee nodded agreement to this, but Dani looked a bit skeptical. Being the older of the two, Dani felt an unwritten obligation for Traycee's safety. A moment passed as she struggled with his offer to bring Traycee back to the hotel.

 Cathy could tell Dani was upset and decided to take matters into her own hands. "That's a great idea," she agreed, cheerfully. "Jeff will see her back to the city." She turned to Dani. "Don't worry, he's very dependable."

 Dani didn't have the strength to argue and, after all, Traycee was a grown woman. She said her goodbyes and she and Cathy walked across the warm sand to the house together.

 As they walked, Cathy silently wondered if Dani's present state had something to do with Michael. She had seen them go up the back stairs together earlier and thought that was a good sign. At least they must have been talking to each other. But now, seeing her friend's troubled eyes as they walked through the double doors where the limousines awaited, she wondered what had happened.

 "I don't think I'll be needed here for awhile," Cathy said as they approached the limousine. "I'll ride to the station with you."

 Once seated in the black leather interior, with a television, CD player, phone and bar all at their fingertips, Cathy directed the driver to take off with only the two of them riding. The silver car glided around the curve of the driveway and headed out the gates of the estate.

 Dani sat quiet, looking out the window, yet seeing nothing.

 "If you're still worried about Traycee, you needn't be," Cathy offered. "Jeff is a nice guy. He'll watch over her."

 Dani only nodded, but Cathy wasn't about to let her get away with silence. She knew Dani too well. "Tell me what's bothering you," she said softly. "It's Michael, isn't it?"

 Dani turned to her, surprise registered on her face.

 "I saw you two together earlier," Cathy confessed.

 Dani looked out the window again. The sun was tilted to the west as late afternoon approached. They passed an 18th century inn, its white clapboard shinning brightly, and the surrounding garden lush in colors of red, blue and deep pink with the lawn lying green between colors. She thought how peaceful the setting looked in comparison to the turmoil she felt inside.

 "I ran into him by accident," Dani finally said. "I should have left the minute I saw him, but I didn't." Seeing him there among his personal things, the poster from the past, the portrait of Vanessa, all those things had softened her feelings toward him enough to make her question her resolve about hating him. How could she explain the perplexity of her feelings to Cathy when she still didn't understand them herself?

 But Cathy knew more than Dani realized. She'd pieced things together since the two had met in her apartment. She took the chance that she was right with her next question.

 "Michael is the one who hurt you all those years ago, isn't he?" she spoke the words softly.

 "Yes," Dani admitted, looking directly at Cathy. "He is. That's why it was such a shock when I saw him at your apartment."

 Cathy nodded. "I thought so. I've thought about you and Michael a lot since that day, and then I sort of pieced it all together." The two sat in silence a moment and a thought struck Cathy that she'd never considered before.

 "Does Michael know what happened to you?" Michael had spoken with her several times about Dani, wondering if she had any idea why she was so hostile toward him. But Cathy never had an answer for him.

 "No. He never knew," Dani replied. "He disappeared before I could tell him."

 "Maybe you should tell him now."

 Dani laughed tightly. "As if he would care! He didn't care then and it makes no difference now." The bitterness in her voice told Cathy more than words could. She hesitated a moment, wondering if she should continue this conversation. After all, she might be wrong about Michael. But, she didn't really believe she was. She decided to take the plunge.

 "He might care more than you realize."

 Dani stared at Cathy a moment. Maybe Miguel had confided in her. "Did he tell you that?"

 "No," Cathy answered. "But I know he feels something for you. It really bothered him that you were so angry toward him."

 Cathy saw Dani roll her eyes and knew she was talking to a brick wall. Sometimes Dani could be so stubborn. But she continued on anyway. "Even if I'm wrong, it wouldn't hurt to tell him. Maybe you could shed that hatred you've been carrying around all these years. The past could finally be put to rest."

 Dani shook her head. "Miguel's never felt anything for anyone, except Vanessa," she corrected herself. "I'm sorry, Cathy. I just don't see him in the same light as you do. And it won't matter one way or another if he ever knows. My feelings for him will never change." She touched her friend's arm as they reached the station. "Promise me you won't say anything to him either."

 "I think you're making a mistake," Cathy told her honestly.

 "Promise," Dani insisted softly.

 "I won't say anything."

 The two slipped out of the car and hugged goodbye. "Keep in touch, okay?" Cathy said.

 Dani nodded and forced a smile, then turned and boarded the train that would take her back to the city.

 Throughout the two-and-a-half hour ride back to Penn Station, Dani's thoughts wandered between past and present. The short time she'd spent with Miguel had completely unnerved her. Not what he'd said or done as much as how her feelings had been altered from one minute to the next. For a brief period, she had actually enjoyed spending time with him. The man she had once believed him to be, warm, caring, compassionate, had resurfaced and she found herself drawn to him as she had nineteen years ago. But then the sight of him with Michelle had been a slap in the face, reminding her why she no longer trusted him, and hated him.

 Her memory flooded with all her reasons for not trusting him. The anguish she'd felt when she'd found him gone. The hurt and humiliation of finding out that other girls from the coffee shop had been involved with him at one time or another and had also been dumped at the drop of a hat. The pain in her parent's eyes when the deception of her relationship with Miguel had been found out. How could she possibly forget, for even a moment, all the pain he had caused her, the pain still real in her heart? It would not happen again, she told herself. She may have to be civil to him at times, but she certainly wouldn't let him make a fool of her again. Once in a lifetime was enough.

 Twilight had completely shrouded the city by the time Dani arrived at her hotel. She stood for a long time on the balcony overlooking Central Park. Fireworks shot up into the darkness and exploded into brilliant suns of color over the park as the crowd below marveled over their magnificence.

 Dani's resolve to thrust the day's events from her mind faded like the fireworks and tears threatened to sting her eyes. She couldn't push the image from her mind of Miguel with Michelle cuddled against him. Would their little girl have looked like Michelle, the combination of his dark hair and her blond creating a fiery redhead? The guilt and pain of what she'd done never went away. It only deepened with the years.

 Her hatred for Miguel now equaled, if not exceeded the love she'd once felt for him. Could she ever let that hate go, as Cathy had suggested? How could she when she had to live with the pain of her actions for the rest of her life? The actions caused only because of her association with him.

 Finally, the fireworks ended and the streets below flooded with people as the crowd dispersed. Dani gave up her thoughts and readied herself for bed. She knew it would be some time before Traycee came in, due to her long ride back on the train. As she turned out the bedside lamp, she tried not to think of Miguel and prayed he wouldn't be at the buyer's showing tomorrow.

Chapter Eight

 The fashion show displaying the Regal Coat winter line was an elaborate event held in the Nieuw Amsterdam Room in The Vista of The World Trade Center and was attended by over 700 buyers from across the country. Round tables covered with crisp hunter green tablecloths and white rose centerpieces in crystal flute vases lined the room with the stage and runway down the middle where the models would display Regal's finest.

 Dani and Traycee arrived early and were escorted to their appointed table by a young woman in a suit of hunter green. Dani decided that hunter green must be Regal's trademark color for it was used frequently in the décor. She pushed all other thoughts aside as she turned to the business at hand and lay out her folder of order forms in preparation for the show.

 Although Traycee was tired from her late night at the DeCara's party, she became animated at the sight of such a prominent event. This was her first major buyers' show and she seemed to want to soak up every detail. Her pent-up enthusiasm made Dani smile. It was times like this that Dani envied her inexperience and youth.

 Dani kept an eye on the crowd as the room filled, keeping a lookout for Miguel in the event he should appear. She hoped he wouldn't, but that seemed unlikely under the circumstances. She wanted to be prepared by seeing him first in case he did.

 Finally the tables were filled and the lights dimmed and the noisy room fell into a quiet hush. Vanessa appeared on the t-shaped stage that filled the center of the room. Her eyes searched the crowd a moment before resting on Dani, and then she gave one of her fabulous smiles, her green eyes twinkling. Dani knew the smile was just for her and once again her heart warmed.

 At Vanessa's introduction, the show began and lithe models glided down the runway to the music displaying coats of all styles and colors. Classic cuts in navy, black and gray, pea coats that were just coming back into style, and modern block-colored styles displaying brilliant greens, yellows, hot pinks and reds. Dani and Traycee became immersed in the business of buying, marking down notes of quantities and colors of each style that caught their eye. Once again Dani was pleasantly surprised by Traycee's buying abilities. She noticed important details and was a great help in selecting styles.

 At last the show concluded with applause for the models and fashions they had displayed, and as the chandeliers above illuminated the room, Vanessa invited the buyers to stay and enjoy the luncheon buffet set out on the side wall. She explained that there would be advisors available for anyone having questions on the new line or about the order forms. Having thanked the buyers again for attending, she made her way off stage and headed straight over to Dani's table. Watching her, with her smooth movements and graceful walk, Dani couldn't help thinking that Vanessa could easily be confused as one of the models.

 "Dani," she said, her voice warm as she sat opposite of her. "I'm so happy I saw you here. You left so quickly yesterday that I didn't get a chance to visit with you."

 "I know, I'm sorry Vanessa," Dani groped for an explanation. "Something just came up and I had to leave." She knew it was a flimsy excuse, but couldn't come up with anything else to say. How could she tell her that her father was the reason for the sudden departure? No, she could never do that.

 Vanessa seemed satisfied with her excuse. "Daddy said he had the honor of showing off Michelle to you." She pretended to pout making Dani want to laugh at the child-like gesture. How many times had she seen that look years ago? And Vanessa always did get her way in the end. "I really wanted to be the one to show her off," she continued.

 "I'm happy I was able to see her before I left," Dani told her honestly. "She's so beautiful. You're very lucky to have her."

 Vanessa smiled, happy at Dani's approval of her daughter as if it was important to her. Once again Dani's heart cried out on the inside and tears threatened to spill from her eyes. She had missed so much of Vanessa's life, a life she would have enjoyed sharing. Just one more reason to blame Miguel for ruining her life.

 "Well, I know Traycee stayed until the end," Vanessa turned her attention to the assistant. "Did you enjoy the party?"

 Traycee beamed. "Oh yes, we, I mean I had a great time." Traycee blushed a little at her stumble over the word 'we'. Dani figured she meant her and Jeff.

 "I'm happy you enjoyed yourself," Vanessa told her. She sighed then. "I'd better get back to business. If you two need anything, let me know." Standing to leave she turned again to Dani. "I hope I see you again soon. Maybe we can have a real visit next time."

 "I'd like that," Dani said, and instinctively stood and hugged the young woman. "I'd like that very much." Then Vanessa was gone, playing hostess to the other buyers and Dani and Traycee once again immersed themselves in the process of order forms and coat details.

 Just as the two were wrapping things up, Traycee announced she was starving. "Do you mind if I get a bite to eat?"

 "Of course not." Dani had been so engrossed with the orders that she'd forgotten all about lunch. "Go ahead. I'll finish these and get something in a minute."

 Traycee left the table as Dani sorted and placed the order forms in their respective folders. She was concentrating so hard on her work that she didn't notice the person who had sat down beside her until he spoke.