Mi Carino (33 page)

Marcella put her hands to her head. “Diego, if you ever strike at someone in my life again it’s over. I mean it!” she stormed out of the room. Ginger strutted behind her. Choosing the guest room she went inside and locked the door. Climbing in bed she exhaled deeply, drawing the covers up over her head.

Three Days Later

The drive out of Seattle had been a time of reflection. There were winding isolated roads with stretches of green farmlands where horses grazed. Fresh air mingled with the warm sun. It allowed her to travel with her top down. She told Diego she’d be gone for a few days. That wasn’t true, she spent those days alone in her loft apartment struggling with her conscience and her heart. She wanted space. And after the last incident with Richard he knew better than to question her wishes. Things with him were getting tense. Juan Juarez now filled her thoughts. Her cell phone buzzed from the passenger seat. Marcella dropped her head back and reached over blindly, retrieving it from the top of her purse then pressed it to her ear. “Hello?”

“
Hey.”

“
Susan, sorry about the other day, not calling you back, things are just…just crazy.”

“
No problem. I wanted to check in. Spoke to Sam and she said you were on the way to see Katchner?”

Marcella sighed. “Yes. He agreed but of course he has his stipulations. Some minor details we need to agree on.”

“
Great. So proud of you Marcie, I really am.”

“
Thanks.”

“
Marcella, how are you? Last we talked you seemed a little worn thin.”

“
I’m worn thin alright. I’ll live. Don’t worry about me. How’s your mother?”

“
Mom passed away last night.”

“
Oh no!” Marcella braked.

“
Yeah, I was calling to let you know.”

“
I’m sorry. How are you and your sister?”

“
We’re okay. I’ll be back in three days, funeral and all. Just wanted to tell you.”

“
I’m coming to see you. I will be there for the funeral.”

“
No, you have Katchner to deal with.”

“
Doesn’t matter, I can phone in the rest of this. I’ll be with you soon. I’ll call you when I’m on my way. You be strong until I get there.”

“
Love you.”

“
Love you too.”

Chapter Seventeen

Baxter’s Funeral Home doors opened. Inside a small chapel for more intimate services was provided. The black marquee at the front listed Agnes Sands as the unfortunate soul to be interned. Mourners filled the thinly spaced rows of wooden foldout chairs. Ladies in dark dresses, men in dark suits, the lot of them sat in silence—listening. Marcella chose to sit in the back row. Her sunglasses covered teary swollen eyes. Her large black umbrella hat cast a shadow over her face. She remained just a spectator. A far cry from the kind of emotional support she and Susan once shared. But she was there.

Susan, her best friend, confidant, the one who could always make her laugh, and never wavered in her support, sat stoically next to her sister at the front of the church. Before them a tall man with greying temples and minister’s collar, eulogized over the tearful family. Marcella feared this kind of pain. Her mother was all she truly had in the world. If she lost her, she’d be all alone. Losing a parent is never easy. Saying goodbye is even harder. Susan needed a friend, and Marcella needed to feel like one again, feel her feet on the ground again.

Her head lowered. A single tear slipped away. She’d been out of touch with those that meant so much to her. Like Susan, Garrett, Sam, hell even her cat didn’t know her anymore.

She sniffed, fingers fumbling over the contents of her clutch bag, searching for a tissue. Wiping under her sunglasses she pushed the emotion down. Including the knot of conflict lodged into her heart.

“
What time does your flight leave?” Diego asked.

“
Six in the morning.”

“
First you went away for business. It’s been days since I’ve seen you. Now you’re leaving again? Why Marcella?”

Marcella zipped a small carry-on bag, in case her flight turned into an overnight stay. She brought it downstairs to put near the door for Diego to load into the car. She turned with a smile. “What do you mean why? You know why.”

“
How long this time? Another week?”

“
Of course not. The funeral is tomorrow. I’ll be home tomorrow night before dinner is cold. We talked about this Diego. She’s my best friend. Her mother died. I have to be there for her.”

“
And who’s going to be here for me?”

“
I don’t understand?”

“
I need you
here
.”

“
And you have me. I’m here every night, hell I’ve missed more days in the past seven weeks from work than I have in the past seven months to be with you.”

“
You’ve been gone a week.” His eyes darkened and his face pinched tight with scorn. “You’re punishing me for hurting that man Richard. I apologized for it. Still you won’t forgive. What else do you want me to do? Say?”

“
That’s not true.” Though she knew part of it was. “I have work, a life, if you would make an effort to know more about it you wouldn’t feel threatened by it.” She mumbled.

“
What does that mean?”

“
Never mind, I’m going to start dinner.”

“
Marcella.” He stepped in front of her. “I don’t want to fight. Not anymore. There are things, a lot going on. I just need you to be patient. I…”

“
What? What do you really want to say Diego?”

He shook his head sadly.

“
I’ll tell you what I need. I need love. Do you love me?”

“
Where does this question come from? We agreed we care for each other.”

“
My heart.”

In all the time she knew him she had never seen uncertainty in his eyes. In that instant he went pale. He looked physically ill by the notion. That hurt her. A lot. Plus she knew he was a dangerous man now. Connected to dangerous people, still she was too afraid to broach the subject. She couldn’t go on this way. “Excuse me.” She said. She walked around him and headed to the kitchen.

Things were out of control. He didn’t want to fight with her. In fact after his meeting with Lance he craved her even more. The past week had been hell. He had blown it big with her by having Lance deal with the man of her past. How was he to know the man wasn’t a threat? Any man who had even a small part of her heart didn’t deserve to breathe. The way he looked at Marcella in the restaurant incensed him. He was lucky to still have his limbs. For a week straight he paced and tossed and turned. He summoned restraint he didn’t know he had to keep from calling her. A week and nothing. When she showed up he had to reign in his emotions, to keep himself from telling her how happy she made him. Then she asked the question of love. Since the death of Ana and Enrique he had never said the word. Never. No wonder she had so little faith in him. If he didn’t deal with Marie and his rage he would lose her.

Diego followed her into the kitchen. Mostly he cooked. He preferred to do so. The times when she did were rewarding as well. Why did he resist her doing things for him in return? How could he explain his actions when he barely understood them himself?

“
Marcella.”

“
Mmm,” she said starting the blender.

“
Marcella,” he said, this time stepping right behind her. “I’m glad you’re back with me.”

Diego’s hand slid up and down her hips. He was so close. The heady cologne and aftershave overwhelmed her senses. She felt soft and vulnerable with him pressed behind her. God help her but just being close to him was satisfying. She exhaled a slow weakening breath. Then he touched her once more. He kissed the back of her head feeling his way around her hips to rub, caress, and touch her everywhere. With a wall of hardness behind her she reclined into him. It felt so safe, he always did.

“
I love you,” she whispered. She said it, out loud. The words felt safe and easy rolling off her tongue. She loved him and she wouldn’t deny it a day longer. Eventually they’d have to have that talk. Unless Richard lied? Maybe Diego had no big sinister secret alliances with dangerous men. It was possible. The stereotype of people of color in that region of the world being tied to a cartel or something was straight out of a Scarface movie. Not reality.

Instead of words he again used his hands. One eased up the front of her blouse and slipped inside. Marcella’s head fell over to the side. “I love you Diego.” She breathed, he cupped her breast and squeezed. “I’m not afraid to admit it.” He stroked her stomach with one hand and pinched her nipple with the other. She felt him growing harder, thicker; each time she said the words. So she said it again. “Don’t make me regret investing my heart with you.”

“
No more regrets.” He pressed his words of desire against her ear. She felt a strong inner withdrawal when his hand moved out of her shirt. She felt his fingers to the front of her blouse, as he began to undo a button at a time while his nose nuzzled the inside cavern of her ear. She felt the heat of his breath against her neck, and his erection so bone straight the urge to have him left the seat of her panty wet.

“
You care for me but you aren’t sure why? Admit it, I scare you
nena
.” Diego said.

“
Yes you do,” she replied softly.

“
I don’t mean to.”

“
Nothing lasts Marcella. Not even if we wish it to.”

Her eyes watered. Diego turned off the stove. He took her by the hand and pulled her from the kitchen to the bedroom. She stayed his seduction with a push at his chest when his touch grew more amorous. “Wait, no sex. Not now. I can’t.”

“
Okay,” he said, disappointment making his voice low and hoarse.

“
Do you like hurting me?” she asked.

“
No.”

“
Trust me Diego I’m not so pathetic that I would beg for love, or stick around hoping for it. I’m here because your actions and your words don’t match. Because if I really leave I’m done, I’m not coming back. So give me one good reason why I should keep doing this with you. How long can we keep it up?”