Mia's Heart (The Paradise Diaries) (11 page)

HolyHell.

I’m
an idiot with amnesia who is sitting on a demon.

A
very tall demon.

I
gulp.

“Calm
down,” Quinn tells me as he glances up at me.  “Horses can sense
fear.  There’s nothing to be afraid of.  I’ve got you.”  He pats
my leg before he walks to Titan’s head.  And I can feel the imprint of
where his hand was on my thigh.  I swallow.  He has a very sexy
hand.  Both hands, actually. 

“You
know, in America, horses are sometimes used for therapy,” Quinn tells me
conversationally, as he leads Titan out of the coral.  I am panicky as we
leave the confines of the fence.  A fence means safety.  And since I
am outside of that fence, I am no longer safe.  I swallow hard. 

“Are
you saying that I need therapy now?” I ask, only half joking.  I clench my
thighs around Titan’s bare, broad back.  I so don’t want to fall
off.  There’s no way that Quinn could catch me in time and I’d break my
neck.  I fight the urge to leap off and run for the house. 

Quinn
glances back up at me. 

“Oh,
you’ve probably always needed it,” he tells me.  “I’ve never met anyone
who tried so hard to be someone that she’s not.”

That
definitely gives me pause.

It’s
almost the same exact thing that Elena said. 

“I’m
kidding,” he chuckles as he sees my expression.  “You did try hard to
portray a certain image.  But I’m sure you didn’t need therapy.  Just
a reality check.”

I
stare at him. 

“A
reality check?  How well did you know me, anyway?”

Quinn
shakes his head and wipes a little sweat from his brow.  He’s got a strong
jawline.  I love that.  I fight to focus on his words, not his
face.  It’s a difficult feat to master. 

“Not
that well.  But you were fairly easy to read. Not so much now, though.”

That
pacifies me a little. 

Sort
of. 

“Why
not now?” I ask slowly. 

Quinn
looks at me uncertainly.  “Because it’s hard to read someone who doesn’t
know who she is.”

“Who
do you think I am?” I am practically whispering now.  I suddenly feel
very, very tired.  I’m physically tired, I’m mentally tired and losing my
identity is just a bit exhausting.

Quinn
stops and turns to me, taking a step and then another, until he is pressed
against my leg and staring into my eyes.

“I
think you’re a sweet little bird who has always tried to break out of her cage
because you really had no idea what life is like outside of your world. 
And now you’re a sweet little bird who doesn’t know what to think.  All of
your masks are gone and now you are forced to be yourself.  It must be
scary for you.”

He
doesn’t sound sympathetic, just matter-of-fact.

And
I have to respect that. 

I
nod. 

“I’m
not a bird,” I tell him.  “But you’re right about one thing.  I don’t
have anything to hide behind now, that’s for sure.” 

“Why
would you want to hide at all?” Quinn asks, still staring into my eyes. 
“That’s the part I could never figure out.  You don’t have anything to
hide from.  You can take life by the tail if you want to.  It’s yours
for the taking.”

“What’s
mine for the taking?” I ask, momentarily confused by his nearness.  He
smiles.

“Anything
you want.”

I
suck in my breath. 

And
he inhales deeply.

And
then the moment is broken by my mother’s shrill screaming.

“Mia
Alexandria Giannis.  Get off of that animal!  You’re going to break
your neck!” I turn and find her rushing out of Giliberti House toward us and
Quinn grins at me.

“I
take it back.  You might want to hide from
that.
”

I
smile back as warmth floods through me.  He lifts me down and I enjoy the
feeling of my body pressed against his, even though it only lasts for a
second.  His heart beats against mine.

Ba-bump.

Ba-bump.

He
glances down at me and his eyes are like melted chocolate.  And I want to
eat him up.

Eat
him up?

Yep. 
With a freaking spoon.

I’m
insane. 

But
he makes me feel so good.

That’s
a fact that I come to realize as I turn away from him to meet my mother. Quinn
walks away to take Titan back to the stables and I miss him immediately. 
Just like I missed Gavin in the hospital yesterday. 

They
both make me feel good in two different ways. 

I
sigh. 

Because
I know that I’m in trouble.  I don’t even know who I am, but I just woke
up from a coma and I find that I want two separate boys for two separate
reasons.  That can never be good. 

At
least I know that much.

Chapter Ten

Dinner
at Giliberti House is interesting. 

Marionnette,
Darius and Quinn eat in the kitchen, because that’s the way they’ve been doing it. 
Quinn apparently didn’t want to eat in the formal dining room alone and the
Papous would never eat in there because they don’t consider that proper
behavior. They are staff, after all.  Even though they seem more like
family.

But
my mother refuses to eat in the kitchen. 

“Mia,”
she sighs.  “The wife and daughter of Stanyos Giannis cannot eat in the
kitchen.  It just isn’t seemly.”

So,
we eat in the formal dining room.

Alone.

And
it feels so stuffy and unnatural.  And I hate it. 

As
I stare down the long table at my mother, I hate it even more.  I have to
practically yell so that she can hear me. That’s how big this table is. 

I
want to join the others in the kitchen, where it is warm and cozy and because
Quinn is there.  But that’s not going to happen.  My mother told me
as much.  Right after she threatened my life if I ever got on a horse
again.  And told me that I need to stay away from Quinn. Which of course,
for some reason, had the immediate and opposite effect.  I want to be near
him more than ever.

Apparently,
I’m rebellious.

So,
I do what any rebellious girl would probably do.

I
eat in sullen silence.  I drink my soup from the spoon, I eat three
croissants (because they really are my favorites) and I have a giant piece of
pie. 

My
mother looks at me in disapproval.

“Mia,
you’re not going to be seventeen forever.  You might want to start
watching what you eat.  You don’t want to gain weight.”

I
roll my eyes.  I’ve got plenty of other things to worry about besides my
weight.  I’m skinny for now and that’s all that matters.  I’ll worry
about my weight when I’m thirty.

“How
long is the construction on our house going to take?” I yell down to my
mom.  She cringes from the volume of my voice.  I’m guessing that it
isn’t seemly.  But how else is she supposed to hear me?  This table
is five miles long.

And
I’m seriously starting to hate the word
seemly.

She
shrugs.  “They say it will take three months or so.  And Kolettis
Academy will be closed for the next two to four weeks for construction, as
well.  I just heard today.  They will add that time onto the end of
the year.  So don’t worry.  You’ll graduate on time.”

I
nod.  I’m happy about being out of school for a month. Hopefully that will
give my memory time to come back.  I’ll focus on that. 

“My
doctor said that I should do things that are familiar to me,” I remind
her.  “He said that it will help my memory.  I think I’ll see if
Gavin wants to go scuba diving tomorrow.”

My
mother looks pained, but she nods.  I’m betting that she would much rather
have me spend time with Gavin, even if we’re doing something she hates, rather
than spend time with Quinn.  I don’t know why and I don’t really
care.  I guess that’s Old Mia’s spunk talking. 

I’m
sort of digging that chick now and I wish I could remember more about her.

“Also,
Marionette told me that Dante and Reece are returning to Caberra for a while to
help with clean-up from the earthquake,” my mother tells me.  “The
downtown area was particularly damaged.  It might do you good to help, as
well.”

“Dante
and Reece are coming?” I ask, surprised. “When?”

She
shakes her head.  “I don’t know. Marionette probably does, though. 
You can ask her.”

I’m
excited by this.  Dante and Reece used to be familiar to me.  If I
talk with them, it might help.  This is a good thing. 

I
immediately pick up my dinner plate and head to the kitchen, ignoring my
mother’s protests.  She doesn’t follow.  Too unseemly, I guess, to
follow your daughter into a kitchen.  I almost laugh, but don’t.  My
mother’s self-imposed rules are sort of funny.  And sort of pathetic.

Marionette,
Darius and Quinn look surprised to see me, but Quinn quickly jumps up and pulls
a chair out for me.  His polite behavior makes my pulse speed up. 
But I try to calm it down.  He’s only exhibiting manners. 
Geez.  I’m sure he’d do it for anyone. 

I
sit down and immediately turn to Marionette, asking her about Dante and
Reece.  Her face is genuinely happy when she answers.

“They’ll
be here soon,” she tells me.  “I think they’re arriving tomorrow. And they
are very excited to see you.”

Quinn
doesn’t look quite as happy, but I’m guessing that has something to do with the
fact that he and Reece have a complicated relationship or so I’m told.

Apparently,
they took turns having a crush on each other for the last ten years or
so.  But they never timed it right and so they never ended up
together.  Quinn dated Reece’s friend Becca for the last couple of years,
although now they’re broken up.  But now Reece is with Dante, so the
timing still isn’t right.  I wonder if Quinn is regretful of that?

He
doesn’t seem to be, though, as he takes a bite of soup.  I can’t help but
notice how big his hands are.  He’s absolutely gigantic. 

“So,
how much trouble did you get into for riding Titan?” he asks, grinning. 
He isn’t apologetic at all.  I like it.

“Not
much,” I answer.  “Just a lecture.  Apparently, I’m supposed to stay
away from you, too. But you can see how well that lecture took.”

Marionette
mutters under her breath and I can see that she doesn’t approve of my mother.
That’s okay. I’m not sure that I do, either.  Quinn’s eyes sparkle. 

“Am
I a bad influence?” he asks with interest.  “I think I might like
that.  I’ve never been the bad boy before.  It might be fun.”

“You’ve
never been the bad boy?” I ask doubtfully.  My eyebrows are
raised.   Quinn shakes his head. 

“Nope. 
I’m a Midwesterner, remember?  Oh, I guess you don’t. Well, I’m from the
heartland of America where we’re polite and friendly and never know a
stranger.  Yes, m’am.  No, m’am and all that.  Although I
am
considering a tattoo. I’m guessing your mom wouldn’t approve of that, either.”

He’s
smiling now, totally unrepentant and unconcerned.  My pulse speeds up yet
again.  It seems to do that a lot around him. 

“A
tattoo?  Gavin said that he’s going to get one that says, “Always
ready.” 

Quinn
rolls his eyes good-naturedly.  “He would.   I haven’t decided
yet what I want.  Maybe you can help me.”

I
raise my eyebrow again.  “Me?  I don’t know you well enough to know
what you should get.”

Quinn
winks.  “Well, maybe that’s part of my diabolical plan.  You’ll have
to get to know me.”

“Devious,”
I grin.  “I like it.  Well, it might backfire on you.  Maybe
I’ll get a matching tattoo and then you’ll be tied to me for life.”

“Needy,”
he observes.  “I like it.”

We
laugh and Marionette and Darius laugh, too.  I really like them.  And
I like this kitchen.  And I have decided that I’m going to eat in here
from now on.  My mother can suck it.  If she doesn’t want to join us,
she can eat out there alone.  She can keep up her seemly appearances all
on her own.

When
we’re finished eating, Quinn walks me out.  We pass through the dining
room and I see that my mother is gone.  She left her dirty dishes,
though.  Obviously carrying them to the kitchen would be unseemly. 
I’m really starting to hate that word. I should make a list of the words I’m
starting to hate.

Seemly.

Soon.

Apparently.

I
can add more later.  Right now, I’m preoccupied with Quinn.  And his
bulging biceps, long fingers and mischievous grin.  I stare up at him and
smile.

“Do
you and Reece get along okay now?” I ask him as we turn onto the staircase
leading to the bedrooms.  He looks surprised.