Michael's Secrets (27 page)

They managed to get over to her booth, and she had just finished interviewing one of the nominees for Best Actor when she saw Michael. He had known Joan for years as she had done a couple of guest hosting spots on
Los Angeles Live
. She waved them up to her makeshift stage, and she didn’t talk directly to them, as she apparently was talking to her daughter who was on the other side of the red carpet, saying, “Mindy, I have Michael Bern here, we’ll switch to you in a minute.” Then, she turned to Sam and Michael and kissed Michael on the cheek.

“Michael Bern has been nominated for Best Original Screenplay for
Birthright,
which has been a huge hit. Michael, how does it feel to be nominated for an Oscar?”

“I have never been happier,” Michael said. “This is the highlight of my career, and even more exciting is that Sam was able to get away from filming in Toronto to be my date tonight. Have you met Sam Jacobs?”

“I know Sam, he plays the sexy delivery guy on
Working for a Living
, right?” she asked Sam.

“And, he’ll be in
Montana Round-up
, which opens in the fall and
Melvin and Sandra
, which will be released next year,” Michael said, beaming proudly for Sam.

“Please, Michael, this is your night. Joan, ask him a question?” Sam said, proud of Michael’s achievements.

“How long have you two been together?” she asked Michael, who froze. They had been dating, but was he ready to call Sam his boyfriend? Were they together? They had been apart more than they were actually together.

“We met almost two years ago, when I parked his car,” Sam said, recovering for Michael.

“Tell me, Michael, who are you wearing?” Joan asked.

He was wearing a black suit with a black shirt and a gray tie, and he wasn’t sure who designed it, so he said, “Something I picked up at Loeman’s on sale.”

Joan and Sam laughed.

Then, Sam said, “I picked up mine in wardrobe, yesterday,” referring to his ill-fitting tuxedo.

“Oh, who cares? You two are so handsome you could be in jeans and still look fabulous,” Joan said. “So Michael, what is your next project?”

“I’m producing and writing a sitcom for HTO, called
Mickey’s Life
. We begin filming in a month,” Michael told her.

“I know it’ll be a hit,” she said.

“And, Joan, I want you to meet Aunt Rona and Aunt Doreen who flew in from Williamsburg, Virginia, to be with me tonight,” as he motioned for Doreen and Rona to step up to the makeshift stage.

“How long have you two been together?” Joan asked.

“Fifty-six years,” Rona said.

“Liar,” Doreen said, “it’s been fifty-four years.”

“Well, it feels like seventy,” Rona said.

“However many years it is, you both look fantastic,” Joan said. “Good luck tonight, Michael. And, Sam, hold on to this one, he’s a catch.” She kissed both of them, and they stepped down.

As a nominee, Michael had an aisle seat eight rows from the front, and Sam and he sat down and looked around at all the stars and other celebrities in attendance. Doreen and Rona sat directly behind them and bickered the entire time about everything from the program to the seats to who this was and who that was, not knowing any of the actors’ names. Michael had to shush them a couple of times, but they would just smile and resume their banter. He also knew Sam was having the time of his life. Michael, however, was a nervous wreck. He had not prepared a speech as he always found that to be pretentious and did not expect to win.

As with any award show, the festivities dragged on longer than necessary, and Michael just wanted it to end. His category came up during the third hour of the broadcast, and as his name was read out loud, Sam squeezed his hand. Michael could swear Sam was more excited than he was.

“And the Oscar goes to … Michael Bern for
Birthright
.”

There was applause, and Michael sat there in shock. He didn’t know what to do. Sam leaned over and kissed him and said, “Get up. You won! Go!”

Michael stood up, turned around to kiss Doreen and Rona, and Stanley King also stood to hug Michael on his way to the podium. Michael thought he was going to trip, but he managed to walk up to the podium without making a complete fool of himself. They handed him the Oscar, which would not be his, as they would have to engrave it then send him the real one by the end of the week. Michael had won enough Emmys to know that routine, but for the sake of the audience, he looked at it as if his name were on it. He stood in front of the podium and could feel his heart beating through his suit, knowing everyone at home could, too. Michael looked down at Sam, who had a big smile on his face and tears in his eyes as well as Rona and Doreen, who pulled tissues from their sleeves.

“Wow, I didn’t expect this,” Michael began. “Thank you. I thank my agent, Sid Goldman, the entire cast and crew of
Birthright
, and everyone over at HTO. I also thank four women who watched over me as a child, Rona Sapperstein and Doreen Weiner Eidleman, who are alive and well and sitting in the audience tonight, and Arlene Feld and my godmother, Florence Kennof, whom I wish could be here to see me holding an Oscar.” As he mentioned Florence and Arlene, Rona and Doreen held each other’s hands as they continued dabbing their eyes. Michael also started to choke up a bit. “I also thank my therapist, Dr. Andrew Mikowsky.” The audience laughed. “But, most of all, I thank Sam Jacobs, who borrowed a tux from wardrobe and flew in from Toronto just to be my date for the evening, and who has shown me that there still are caring, considerate and wonderful men in the world. I love you. Thank you, so much.” Michael looked right at Sam, who was crying, and held up the Oscar and turned around.

Michael was led off the stage by the Oscar models to the press room, where they peppered him with questions about his career and what he was doing. Surprisingly, no one asked him about Sam. So, he said to one reporter, “Don’t you have any questions about Sam Jacobs, my date?”

“Yes,” he said. “How long have you two been together?”

“Sam and I met almost two years ago,” Michael said. “Remember his name, Sam Jacobs. He’s a great actor and a terrific guy.”

With that, Michael excused myself, handed the pseudo Oscar to one of the stage hands and returned to his seat. Sam hugged him before he sat down, then he whispered in Michael’s ear, “Thank for what you said about me. And for the record, you are also a caring, considerate, and wonderful man.” Michael smiled at him, still reeling in the excitement of winning an Oscar.

His was the only win for
Birthright
.

The four of them went to Spago for the after-Oscar party, then they made the rounds to all the other Oscar parties, ending up at Stanley King’s house, where Michael received thunderous applause when he arrived with Sam by his side and Doreen and Rona in tow. He was the belle of the ball. Sam and Michael both only had the occasional sip of champagne all night as they both discovered that neither liked bubbly. At around 1:00 am, Doreen and Rona were exhausted, so Michael sent them back to the hotel in the limo, which returned to pick up Sam and Michael. By 3:00 am, they finally arrived home, still sober, and they wondered how many others in Hollywood were sober that night. Michael tipped the chauffeur, and he was on his way.

They were still full of energy from the evening, so Michael and Sam decided to sit out on the deck and enjoy some alone time, as they had not been able to talk since he arrived at what seemed a day earlier, but was really only a short time ago.

As Sam went out to the deck, Michael reached into the refrigerator and found a bottle of Manischewitz Blackberry Wine, which he kept for no particular reason. He unscrewed the top and poured two glasses.

Before he carried them out to the deck, Michael went into the bedroom, took off his jacket and tie and found a small box he had kept in the drawer of his nightstand, and he put the box in his pocket. He then went back into the kitchen, picked up the two glasses of wine, walked out to the deck, and sat next to Sam.

“Here, some Jewish bubbly for you,” Michael said, handing him one of the glasses.

“Oh boy, Concorde grape?” Sam asked.

“No, Manischewitz Blackberry,” Michael answered with a smile as he raised his glass.

They clinked glasses and sipped the wine.

“Mmmm, I love this stuff, but I should be careful. I get drunk on one glass,” Sam said, winking at Michael.

“Me, too,” Michael said as they laughed.

“Michael,” Sam began as he put his glass down on the table. “I have something to tell you.”

Michael’s heart stopped. This was such a great night that he didn’t want anything to ruin it. “If it is bad news, don’t tell me tonight,” he said.

“It isn’t bad news, I promise,” he began. “I just have to return to Toronto in the morning. My flight leaves at seven,” he said.

“That’s in less than four hours,” Michael said, disappointed that he was leaving so soon after arriving. “At least I got this small amount of time with you.”

Sam looked at Michael and smiled. “But I do have good news. We should wrap up in the next two weeks. I’ll be coming back then to stay. Sid lined up an audition for a new police drama,” he said, reassuring Michael he would see him again.

“Then we can be together more often and take this relationship to the next level,” Michael said with a wink. But, Sam remained quiet and stared into the darkness. “You do want to continue seeing me, don’t you?” Sam took a sip of his wine, put the glass down, then took a deep breath. “Oh, no,” Michael said, “I know that look.”

Sam looked at Michael, and he had tears in his eyes. He then looked down before beginning to speak.

“There is something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about for some time … and I don’t know exactly how to tell you this …”

“You’re seeing someone else,” Michael said.

Sam looked up at him, surprised.

“I’ve been around the block a few times,” Michael continued.

“We met a year ago, and I wouldn’t call it serious, and he knows about you, but I swore a long time ago I would never fall in love again, so I told him, I could not be in a relationship unless we were able to see other people, and I know you are perfect for me, but if I saw you exclusively, I would fall in love with you, and I can’t risk that,” he said without taking a breath.

“What?” Michael asked. “I’m perfect for you, but you can’t risk falling in love with me because you swore you’d never fall in love again? What kind of weird bullshit is that … and where the fuck is this coming from?”

“I know it sounds crazy,” Sam said. “I don’t understand it myself. I want to continue seeing you, but I can’t see you exclusively because …”

“You’ll fall in love with me, I heard you,” Michael said as he shook his head. “Well, I’m not ready to expend my energies on a relationship that is doomed from the start as you have no intention of falling in love with me and will do anything to keep that from happening … Is there anything else I need to know, or is this your only surprise tonight?”

Sam looked out into the darkness again and took another sip of the sweet wine. He put the glass down and looked at Michael. “Sam Jacobs is not my real name.”

“What?”

“I’m not Jewish, either.”

Michael was in shock. He stood up and paced the deck before stopping and looking at Sam’s back.

“Who the fuck pretends to be Jewish? Are you also straight?”

Sam looked back at Michael and said, “I’m gay … by my career was going nowhere, and I figured I was just another WASPy actor, so I changed my name to give me some ethnicity. I know it sounds backwards, but I needed a boost, and if you knew I wasn’t Jewish, would you have called me?”

Michael sat down and looked at Sam. “I guess we’ll never know, will we. So, what is your real name, and how did you come about looking so Jewish?”

“Bob Essex … and I had a nose job to give me a more ethnic look, and I dye my hair and eyebrows one shade darker. It’s amazing what a difference the slightest change can make,” Sam answered with an attempt at a smile.

Michael looked right at him and said very calmly, “Get the fuck out of my house. Leave … now.”

“But, Michael …” Sam pleaded.

“Leave before I call the police and have you forced off my property, Bob Essex. Don’t say another word unless you want me to call Sid right now and tell him everything you just told me,” Michael said without looking at him or raising his voice.

Sam stood up and grabbed his jacket, “How can I get a cab this time of day?”

“I don’t give a shit … walk,” Michael said.

Sam hesitated then opened the back door and walked through the house, and when Michael heard the front door close behind Sam, he put his head in his hands and cried.

After a few minutes, he sat up, wiped his eyes and looked out into the yard. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the box he intended to give Sam. He rolled it around in his palm before opening it. Once he opened it, he pulled the gift out and held it in front of his face. It was a key ring with the keys to his house and the Corvair on it.

“What an asshole,” Michael said as he returned the key ring to the box, stood up, and walked into the house shutting the back door behind him.

Chapter Fourteen

On a Friday night in May 2007, Michael came home around 1:00 am from a day of taping
Mickey’s Life
. He had forgotten about the long days taping a one-camera show. The show was about a mixed-race gay couple, one a writer and the other a former actor, who adopt three kids and live in Los Angeles, so they filmed a lot of exterior shots into the night.

He took a shower and climbed into bed, hoping to get a few hours sleep since he would not have to be at work until Monday morning.

Around 7:00 am, there was a knock on the door. Michael opened his eyes and saw the time. He thought it must be a delivery or something, but he quickly realized it was Saturday. Michael jumped out of bed and didn’t even bother putting anything on figuring his white briefs were enough of a cover up. He looked through the window in the front door, and he could not believe who was standing on his porch. Michael opened the door and stood there with his mouth wide open.