Mine to Hold (20 page)

“You’ve trekked across half the country in two days, been shot at . . .”

“Yeah.” But that wasn’t really the problem. Tyler tapped nervously on the phone with his thumb, then decided to go for broke. “How did you convince Morgan that you were the right one for her?”

“Whoa, that’s out of left field.”

“Sorry.”

“That’s okay. To be honest, I was relentless about getting Morgan into bed. But then I fucked up, and I had to grovel a lot. Ultimately, I had to put the decision in her hands. I couldn’t force her to trust me a second time.”

Tyler squeezed his eyes shut. Jack was right, but that was the last goddamn thing he wanted to hear. Del wasn’t ready to believe that he was into her for the long haul. Hell, despite the way he felt,
he
wasn’t even sure. She had too much on her plate for him to expect her to sort it out now.

“You in love with Del?” Jack asked.

How the hell could he answer that? “Never really been in love. I don’t know.”

“What about Alyssa?”

“A very beautiful crutch.”

Jack paused. “You tried to use her and all the other strippers to avoid thinking of Del?”

“Pretty much.”

“Well, damn.” Jack sighed. “I’m going to owe my wife something from Tiffany for being right—again.”

“About my feelings?”

“Yep. She knew right away that you loved Del and that you were going to go after her.”

Tyler sat back. Morgan had seen that? “What if I’m not good for her? I’ve got a lot of feelings for Del, but I’ve never tried the long-term relationship thing. Even the word used to give me hives.”

“Picture the rest of your life without Del and give me a one-word description of it.”

“I can’t decide between bleak or pathetic,” Tyler admitted finally.

“There you go.”

He raked a hand through his hair. “But I know fucking nothing about loving a woman for the rest of her life.”

“Think I knew anything before I married Morgan? I had subs, not girlfriends. The most bonding I did was a slave to the wall, never a woman to me. Thankfully, once I earned Morgan’s trust again, she had most of it figured out. Follow your gut. Once you win Del back, work with her. Listen. Together, you’ll find the answers.”

Jack made it sound so easy. Tyler hoped his buddy was right.

***

AS
they drove with the rising sun at their backs, Del tried not to look at Tyler. She’d only remember waking up in his strong arms and feeling genuinely safe for the first time in weeks. She tried to forget how badly she’d wanted to snuggle up to him, kiss him awake . . . and see where the morning led them.

Stupid. Of course, Tyler would have sex with her. He had a lot of sex, and none of it meant anything to him. Putting her heart out there with him just didn’t make sense. Tyler was a great guy, but when it came to monogamy, she didn’t think he was built for more than a night or two. And was she really ready to jump back into the relationship pool? She knew all too well how one minute everything could seem great, then in the next . . . anger, accusations, blame, heartache. Signing up for that possibility again simply didn’t hold any appeal.

“You’re not drinking your coffee.” He glanced down at the fast-food cup full of java.

“It’s like battery acid eating away at my stomach. No, thanks.”

“You didn’t eat, either.” Tyler sighed, rubbed his forehead. “We should talk about it.”

“No, we shouldn’t. Unless you just want me to bolster your male ego, then I’ll admit that you were great and rocked my panties. Thanks.”

“I don’t give a shit about my ego.”

“That’s right. You’ve had plenty of girls over the years tell you how good you are in bed. Dozens? Hundreds?”

“I didn’t count, and stop trying to make what happened between us impersonal. You mean something to me, Del. I wouldn’t fucking be here now if you didn’t. If you’re trying to protect yourself by acting like it doesn’t matter, you can do that. But it matters to me, and I’m going to prove it.”

Shame stung her cheeks. She was being a bitch and hurting Tyler’s feelings. Del didn’t know why he was trying so hard to convince her that he cared about her. Because she was Seth’s mother? Because he felt guilty? Or because she really did matter?

“I’m sorry if I hurt you. I just can’t chase Carlson, worry about Seth, and think about my love life now. I’ll admit you’re spectacular in bed. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want you again. I’m more than willing to be your lover until all this crap is over. Just . . . don’t talk to me about emotions. Whatever you think you’re feeling, it’s the situation, not me. You’ll get over it and move on. So let’s just enjoy each other now and not worry about the rest, all right?”

Tyler opened his mouth, looking like he was going to object, when Del’s phone, sitting in her lap, rang. They both glanced at the display, and anxiety gripped her when she saw an all-too-familiar number pop up.

Chapter Ten

“E
RIC?”
Del’s voice shook.

Tyler’s gut tightened. She’d been trying to call her ex-husband to get the flash drive she’d stashed in his house, but it rubbed Tyler the wrong way that Eric thought he could call Del and expect her to answer after the terrible way he’d treated her.

“Put him on speaker,” Tyler murmured.

She hesitated, then complied, hitting a button.

“—the fuck are you into?” Eric was ranting. “I come home from a week in Cancun to find a bunch of messages on my answering machine from you that abruptly stop three days ago. After my flight landed at LAX, I called in to the precinct to check in. Some of my buddies tell me your car exploded. I came home to find my house has been ransacked. Not robbed, but torn apart. What do your panicked messages, which they listened to, by the way, have to do with this?”

Del sent him an alarmed glance. Tyler knew that she was thinking the same thing he was: What if whoever broke into Eric’s had stolen her flash drive?

She clutched the phone, looking angry and nervous. “I didn’t do anything to your house while you were gone. I’ve been away. I had to leave town after the car bomb.”

“When did this start? The guys at the precinct said you were gone by the time they arrived on the scene to find your car was damn near ash. They have no idea who’s behind this. From your voice mails, I’m guessing you do. What’s going on? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

“We’re no longer married. I’m not your problem anymore. I just called you for one small favor.”

“To hell with that, Del. If someone is trying to kill you, tell me. We may not be married anymore, but damn it . . . I want to do something. Is the asshole who’s trying to kill you the same one who broke into my house?”

“It’s complicated.”

He huffed. “Since I solve crimes for a living, I think I can figure it out.”

Del looked at Tyler, her expression a silent question. He shook his head. No telling who was onto her connection with Eric. Better not to talk more specifically until they were face-to-face. If Carlson had anything to do with Eric’s place being trashed, the culprits could have just as easily planted listening or surveillance equipment.

“It’s not safe for me to talk right now.”

Eric hesitated. “I understand. The kid okay?”

Tyler gritted his teeth. He should probably shut up, but . . . “My son’s name is Seth, and you can stop barking at Del.”

Eric didn’t say anything for a long moment. “Tyler? When the hell did you meet up with Del? Are you sniffing at her skirts again?”

Not “Hi, old friend” or “How have you been?” It rubbed Tyler entirely the wrong way. “Don’t be a stupid motherfucker. She needed help. I’m helping her. Are you more concerned about what I might be doing with your ex than the fact that someone’s trying to kill her?”

“Fuck you!”

“Stop it, both of you!” Del insisted. “Eric, Seth is fine. My personal life is no longer your concern, so let’s please keep this civil. I only have one favor to ask of you, and it won’t take too much of your time. Can we come by in a bit? I’ll help you pick up.”

“We? So you and my former best friend are a couple now?”

“No.”

“Yes,” Tyler said at the same time, then glared Del’s way. “Definitely yes. I care about her and I’m going to keep her safe, since you’re too busy running off your mouth. That’s all you need to know.”

“Tyler . . .”

He heard the protest in her voice, and it just pissed him off all over again. But they had to deal with Eric first.

End that,
he mouthed to Del, pointing at the phone.

Her mouth tightened. Yeah, she didn’t much like being told what to do. Tyler understood, but there was more than pride at stake here.

“So can we come by later?” She spoke into the phone.

Eric hesitated, and Tyler had no doubt his former friend wanted to refuse. “
She
can come.”

“Get your head screwed on straight, man. Someone is trying to kill her. I’m not in a hurry to see you, either, but if you care an ounce for her, you shouldn’t want her running around unprotected.”

Tyler could almost hear Eric gnashing his teeth.

“Fine,” he snapped finally. “What time?”

Since they were still out in the middle of the desert, it was going to be a while. “We’ll call you.”

Moments later, they hung up. Del clutched her hands in her lap, looking ready to explode.

“Spit it out,” Tyler demanded.

Like she’d just been waiting for a sign, Del lifted her head and looked at him like he’d gone mad. “Seriously? You know Eric almost as well as I do. Everything you said to him was like waving a red cape in front of an enraged bull’s face.”

“He isn’t going to treat you like that.”

“That was an improvement! He called Seth a kid instead of a brat. He didn’t tell me to go fuck myself or that I deserved whatever mess I’d gotten myself into. You told Eric to get his head out of his ass and stop thinking with his pride. You need to do the same. This crap you’re pulling isn’t helping. We need his cooperation to search the house. I hid the flash drive really well. Hopefully, it’s still there, but we won’t ever find out if you don’t stop the verbal equivalent of lifting your hind leg and pissing on me like a fire hydrant.”

Tyler tried to swallow down his rising fury. The crappy thing was, she was right. He was being overprotective and possessive. Eric couldn’t hurt her through the phone. But he didn’t like her talking to the asshole, didn’t like remembering that his former buddy used to sleep curled around her, kiss her awake, join her in the shower each morning—then put on his uniform and cozy up to badge bunnies all day.

Del deserved better. But above all else, she had to stay alive. Which meant that Tyler needed to stop being an ass and focus on the flash drive.

“Sorry. I don’t want to see him hurt you again.”

Her face softened. “Thanks. Sometimes, you can be a great guy.”

“I can be a great guy for you.” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them.

Melancholy tinged her smile. Regret. “When I was pregnant, I used to wonder what it would have been like if we’d met under different circumstances. You know, if I’d never married Eric, and you two weren’t friends. Would we have had any connection or would I have just been another girl you tapped and forgot?”

“You’re not the kind of girl I can forget, Del.”

“Because we have so much history, and it’s all just tangled . . .”

“Because it’s
you
. You’re what attracts me, not the fact that you’re Eric’s ex-wife or the mother of my son. You’re sassy, smart, funny, and honest.”

“I’m not the only woman in the world like that. I’m sure you’ve done a few and probably just never talked to them long enough to learn about them.”

Tyler gritted his teeth. “They weren’t you. What is your fascination with my sex life?”

“C’mon, Tyler. We both know that I’m one of many. Yes, Seth puts me in a slightly different category, but—”

“Bullshit!” He pounded on the steering wheel. “Is that the crap you tell yourself so you won’t care too much about me?”

She frowned. “I just . . . know you. I’ve known you for years. I’m not expecting that sleeping with me or being a father will make you be a different person. I’m just being realistic.”

“I’ve changed.”

“In some ways, yes, you have. But according to the conversation I overheard you having on the patio with your harem, you’re having anal sex with Alyssa’s strippers in the dressing room regularly, causing them to catfight onstage about you. That sounds like the same ol’, same ol’ to me.” She shrugged. “Whatever. Like I said, I don’t expect to change you.”

Tyler felt heat creep up his neck and face. She had a point, but she didn’t really know how he felt on the inside. “You’re not going to believe me if I tell you I marked time with them but always wanted you.”

“You’re right.” Her smile was faintly apologetic. “Be reasonable, Tyler. I’ve known for years that you’re a playboy. I see that something about you is different now, but if you’re really trying to convince me that you’re a whole new person, I need more than forty-eight hours to believe it. And if not . . . really, it’s okay. I’m not asking you to be different.”

Frustration carved up Tyler’s composure, but he grabbed a ruthless grip on his temper. “But I think I am. So I’ll be here for you, day in and day out. You’ll get it eventually.”

She cocked her head at him and laid a gentle hand on his arm. “I think you really believe that at this moment, but the first gorgeous Latina who walks by you with cleavage and a lush booty . . . I’m pretty sure I know what’s going to happen. You don’t have to pretend to be something for me that you’re not. If you’ll just spend some time with Seth and let him get to know you, that’s all I ask.”

But Tyler wanted more. He couldn’t dispute everything he’d done before Del had walked back into his life. And he couldn’t convince her with words in just a few short hours that she was different to him. Only time would do that. Tyler didn’t know how much of that he had.

Wouldn’t his mother be laughing now, if she could see him? Even she would doubt his staying power in a relationship. He might never have had any before, but this felt different. He felt tethered to Del, and it may not make sense, but he knew if the strings connecting them were cut, something in him wouldn’t survive it again.

But to Del’s point, she needed time. In the midst of danger and crisis wasn’t the best moment to expect her to notice or believe that he had become a different man.

Gripping the wheel with one hand, he tangled the fingers of the other in her hair, bringing her close to him. “I’m going to give you everything you need and want—and more. I promise you that. Just give me time to prove it.”

A
few hours and another vehicle exchange on the outskirts of L.A. later, they rolled up in front of her house. Her former house. She’d loved this little Craftsman but lacked the money to buy Eric’s half in the divorce. He’d come up with the cash somehow, so she’d signed away her rights and turned over the keys. The money had given her the down payment on a new condo, allowing her to get a fresh start with Seth. It had all worked out.

But coming back here was always like visiting a haunted house. So many memories. Some good, like Eric carrying her over the threshold with a smile. Some not so good, like the morning her pregnancy test had come up positive. There’d been the barbeques and holidays with friends and family. There’d been the nights Eric had come home hours after his shift ended, looking utterly spent, and when she’d needed his attention, he’d merely flopped on the bed and fallen into a deep sleep. Del turned her gaze away from the little house.

“You okay?” Tyler grabbed her hand and squeezed.

She nodded. He was trying to help, and she had to lay off him about his past. It was really none of her business who or how many women he’d slept with. The jealousy was misplaced and pointless. He still slept around a lot. That was Tyler. She agreed that in some ways he’d changed, but so much that he was suddenly the model of fidelity? That wasn’t likely, but it didn’t matter. They were here to stop Carlson, not rekindle anything. Seth had to come first. Tyler wanted to protect and help her; she needed to be grateful for that—and stop wishing that, maybe, they could have more.

“Fine. Let’s go.”

Tyler ducked out of the sedan, climbing the steps up the hill beside her, heading for the door. He wrapped a beefy arm around her waist.

She sent him a rueful stare—but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t like his protectiveness. “You don’t have to do that.”

“Yeah, I do.” And he clearly wasn’t going to budge.

“Eric isn’t going to hurt me.”

“Do we really even know him anymore?” His face tightened. “I’m not taking a chance.”

Maybe Tyler had a point. In truth, she felt more secure, and maybe Eric would dial down the volume on his asshole meter if he knew someone would defend her.

As they reached the door, she knocked softly. Eric unlocked the bolt and ripped the door open, his dark eyes glowering in a newly tanned and freshly rested face as they popped back and forth between her and Tyler. His gaze settled on Tyler’s palm curled around the curve of her opposite hip.

“You’ve got a lot of nerve,” Eric spit at Tyler.

“I’m not the one who told my friend to fuck my wife, then got pissed off when they both liked it. You cast her out onto the street when she was pregnant and you never fucking called me once to tell me she was going to have my son. What kind of miserable bastard does that make you?”

Eric flushed. “You don’t know all the details.”

“I know enough to know she’s better off without you.”

Del stepped between them. Clearly, seeing her with Tyler brought out all of Eric’s insecurities and anger. She had to try to soothe everyone’s anger or this was going to end badly.

“Guys, stop. So you’re never going to be great friends again. Fine. But let’s bury the hatchet so we can all stay alive. I’d rather not stand on the porch and scream out all our secrets.”