Miss Taken (18 page)

When Diana gave me the cold shoulder as she
emerged from her Spanish class, I was glad all over again that I
hadn’t shared any home-baked treats with her.

Truth to tell, M. Waddell is another one who
doesn’t need extra starch. But I think baked goods are a better
choice than alcohol, at least during school hours.

Strange but true scientific fact: To
determine a mate’s level of interest, the male porcupine douses his
potential love with urine - standing six feet away due to her
quills - until he gets the go-ahead.

I am definitely going to start carrying a
poncho.

I know I should have been strong enough to
choose sisterhood over love. But the way Diana had refused to even
listen to me for a minute, I could only conclude that all is fair
in love and war.

Kyle was now my object. I figured I had made
up a good amount of ground after my generosity with the muffins.
The biology joke goes that the quickest way to a man’s heart is
through his veins. I haven’t decided if I’m going to tell Kyle that
one yet. In the meantime, I’m sticking with the common wisdom which
holds that food is the foolproof route to get there.

Kyle liked the chocolate-covered bacon bits I
brought in the next day. And when I asked him if he wanted to “work
together” on the math homework, I barely got the sentence out of my
mouth before he jumped on it.

My friendly overtures paid off after only two
days. We were staining cell samples when Kyle asked if I was doing
anything Friday night.

I nearly dropped the slide but recovered
quickly. After checking around to make sure no one - such as Diana
- was near, I said boldly, “No. You wanna do something?”

“Yeah. You want to meet up at the mall for a
Soke?”

I thought we had been models of discretion.
We didn’t even walk together from bio to gym because Kyle said he
wanted to stop off at his locker. I contained my enthusiasm to a
couple of thumbs-up in Hannah’s direction with a significant nod in
Kyle’s direction. Kyle and I kept the smiles and meaningful glances
to a minimum even though it was hard since we were standing next to
each other. When I got hit twice in the head with the volleyball by
someone on my own team from Diana’s end of the court, however, I
worried perhaps we hadn’t been so vigilant after all.

Hannah, for one, was across the net from us
and giving me glances I could only categorize as displeased, which
I found confusing. She was the one who had encouraged me. And it
was impossible that she secretly liked Kyle. She categorically
refuses to date underclassmen, even if the freckles weren’t an
immediate no-go.

There was no doubt Hannah had understood me.
I had an evil wish that she would tattle to Ned about my date with
Kyle. But even if she had, chances were slim to none that Ned would
see me out with his rival because he is almost always grounded.

The mall is new and is the hottest place to
go if you’re a teenager living anywhere within a twenty mile radius
of the place. Kids may even come from farther away for all I know.
I stressed a little that Mom would say no, but when she heard it
was Kyle I was going to meet, she couldn’t have been more eager to
take me.

The prospects of this date were kind of
ruined by the way she was practically throwing me into his arms.
Then when we got there, I had the additional worry that she was
going to stick around to chat up his mum.

But she didn’t. She just told me to be on
time when she came back to pick me up when the mall closed at nine.
It was pretty lame to have a date end so early. But I was counting
down to when I would be sixteen and not need to rely on parental
rides to get anywhere anymore ever. Only 487 days to go. It’ll be
here before I know it.

Kyle showed up right on time, but he was
acting strange. Obsessively checking a watch five minutes into a
date is not a positive sign in my book. When I asked him about it,
he apologized, said it was a nervous habit and didn’t mean
anything.

He clicked a (real) piece of gum at me and
smiled, but I thought it odd that I had never noticed that
particular nervous habit before.

We went to the food court. As we ate, he was
still acting odd, except instead of checking his watch every two
seconds, he kept scanning the crowd. Again I asked if there was
anything wrong. He said no and then started talking about random
things, school, their new house, getting a job after school. I
didn’t get a chance to reply most of the time and he didn’t seem to
notice.

In case it isn’t obvious, this date was not
turning out to be much fun.

I couldn’t stand it any longer. Interrupting
his thoughts on the comparative merits of working in a pizzeria
versus an ice cream shop, I asked, “Are you looking for
someone?”

“No,” he protested a little too quickly. “I
don’t know anyone here. Who would I be waiting for?” He cracked his
gum many times in a row.

I considered him for a long moment. “Wanna
walk around?”

“Sure, yeah, good idea.”

Kyle didn’t make a move to hold my hand.
Several kids from school were there, which was to be expected, but
it didn’t seem like a good enough reason not to at least touch me
in some way, even if it wasn’t to stroll along with our hands in
each others’ back pockets like some couples were doing.

The remainder of the “date” with Kyle was
spent by me fantasizing about whether Ned would have held my hand
or stuck it in my back pocket (I’m not sure I would have liked that
anyway. Things are a bit squishy back there. Have to get those leg
lifts on the schedule.) and regretting all the time I wasted on
attempting to fix my hair and trying on a dozen different outfits
that were now lying wrinkled on my bedroom floor, all for this dud
of a night out.

After we circled the mall twice on all three
levels there was still a little time left till my mom was due. I
asked Kyle where he was planning on meeting his mother. He said,
“Oh. Umm, where is your mum picking you up?”

I told him. He said, “Oh, no, my mum said
she’d meet me at the other end, by Lacy’s.”

I considered telling him that I was going to
call my mother and tell her to pick me up at Lacy’s too, just to
see his reaction. Then I decided he wasn’t worth it.

There was just no chemistry with this guy. I
had let my head get turned by the slightest bit of attention from a
boy. This was a sucky lesson, for sure. I picked up Kyle’s wrist in
one last attempt to be flirty and salvage this lame date.

“Well, I guess it’s about time for me to be
going.” I looked meaningfully at him.

“Oh, yeah,” he said, twisting his hand away
from mine and up into a wave. “Well, this was fun. Thanks for
coming out with me tonight.”

I leaned in ever so slightly as one final,
unmistakeable hint. He saw he couldn’t escape and gave me the
driest, most brotherly peck, nowhere near my mouth. “Say, would you
want to meet up sometime this weekend to study?”

My cheek felt cold where his lips had touched
it. “I’m pretty busy.”

“Okay then. See you Monday.” Single shot from
a finger pistol.

So that was that. I turned without even
saying goodbye. Even though you would think my eyes should have
toughened up by this point, they were prickling dangerously. I
walked away quickly, doing long division with three digit divisors
to make the tears retreat. I was only about twenty feet away from
Kyle when an idea struck me.

I turned around just in time to see him
heading down the corridor leading to the movie theaters.

Robin Jane’s sixth sense was right. That red
hair of his is good for something. I had no trouble keeping tabs on
him.

He was definitely meeting someone. But not
with a million chances would I have ever guessed who that someone
was.

Even though I was easily a hundred feet or
more away from them, I had no trouble recognizing that impeccably
styled golden hair.

Hannah.

I could still hear her telling me how he
“wasn’t her type.” I guess tigers don’t change their stripes so
easily after all.

I watched them buy their tickets and go in to
the theatre, hands in each others’ back pocket of their pants. Why
I stayed to watch that part, I don’t know. Just before they went
in, Hannah turned, looked straight at me and - I swear -
winked.

Even as my eyes fogged up with condensation,
the strains of mall music got through to my ears. “Maneater.” Never
was a more appropriate song ever translated into Muzak.

Those contacts of mine needed to come out.
And I was going to be late for meeting my mother.

As I made my way to the other end of the
mall, I counted tiles containing gold flecks. Mom could hear me
panting from practically running to be on time but that didn’t stop
her from scolding. That pushed me over the edge.

“Not now, Mom, please,” I said, my voice
cracking.

The only good thing about being a blubbering
idiot was that it shut her up.

I was so happy to see my laundry pile. I
vowed never to get off it to go out again. It was much more loyal
than any stupid human ever would be.

The next day I was supposed to meet a certain
traitor for tutoring at the library. I called her, expecting her to
cancel or at least explain how she had had the nerve to do what she
did. She acted like nothing had changed between us.

Maybe she hadn’t seen me at the mall. But
then I had to wonder if Kyle told her about our lame little kid
date right before their big date to the double feature movie that
didn’t let out until after midnight. The idea of the two of them
laughing into their giant tub of popcorn at my naivete made me feel
sick all over again.

I canceled on her, saying that I wasn’t
feeling well, which wasn’t even a lie. The two-faced witch had the
nerve to act all concerned. Before I could start blubbing into the
phone, I hung up.

Strange but true scientific fact: Only 3-5%
of mammals are monogamous.

I spent a miserable weekend wallowing in
self-pity. The weather was foul to match my mood. When Monday
rolled around again, I marched through the day, not even attempting
to conceal my anger from any and all of the guilty parties. Kyle
was a quick study and steered clear of me. Hannah stopped me in the
hall, ostensibly to ask if I was feeling better.

Ha. As if she ever cared a whit about me
other than my amazing abilities in the math realm.

I waved off her phony concern and stalked
away.

She actually had the nerve to bring it up
again when we were in the locker room changing for gym.

I stared, incredulous that she was insisting
on the matter.

“I’m fine,” I snapped.

“Well, I can see that you’re not sick,” she
replied. “I’m just wondering why you’re all pissed off at me. I
haven’t even seen you.”

I was so close to shouting,“But I saw you!” I
was sure she could hear me yelling inside my head.

But rather than answer right away, I worked
out the approximate square footage of the mall based on the number
of tiles I had counted after catching Hannah and Kyle together.
Then I realized that I had seen the answer on the TV news.

Lightly, I asked, “So, what did you do Friday
night?”

She didn’t even have the decency to blush.
“Went to the movies.”

“Oh?” I said, acid creeping into my voice.
“Go with anyone special?”

“As a matter of fact, I had a date.” She
looked away at first, but met my gaze with the word ‘date.’

“Anyone I know?”

“Yeah.”

I made a solemn vow to myself that I was not
going to be the first one to say his name. “Oh, really? Who?”

“Why are we playing this game? Don’t pretend
you didn’t see me wink at you.”

Hannah’s good, I have to admit.

“Okay, so since we both know who we’re
talking about, were you aware that I had gone out with the nameless
person right before you had your hot date?” Robin Jane
interrogates.

“Yeah, he mentioned it.”

I was almost knocked over with that avowal.
“How could you Hannah?”

Hannah scowled and fluffed her hair. “You
don’t get it at all, Jane.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means exactly what I said: You don’t get
anything.” She paused, considering me for a minute before striking
the final blow. “ You didn’t miss anything. He’s a crappy kisser.”
She turned with another flip of her perfectly manicured hair and
sashayed out to the gym floor.

I sank down on a bench, grateful that there
was one there to stop me from hitting the floor. More tears. It’s a
good thing those contacts of mine are stuck on like glue.

Strange but true scientific fact: Everyone
has a blind spot where the optic nerve passes through the retina.
This is why it is easier to see a star by looking slightly to one
side of it.

Some people’s blind spots are bigger than
others.

Ned continued his boycott of any
acknowledgement of my existence. I tried to feel angry, but I only
felt depressed. I spent another day in isolation, only coming out
of my Ice Queen persona to snarl at anyone who had the audacity to
approach me. There weren’t many takers.

Diana regarded me hostilely and muttered that
I was acting like a psycho. Kyle must have been warned off by
Hannah. He sat as far as he could from me during bio lab and just
slid the paper across the table if it was necessary that I add to
it. He moved to the opposite side of the room when I picked up any
power tools in wood shop. My shelf was looking more pathetic with
each hole I drilled.

The weather suddenly turned milder with that
smell of thaw that makes your heart leap thinking spring is just
around the corner. I asked to go to the courtyard for study hall
and got permission, most likely because there weren’t any other
takers as it was very muddy and not actually warm outside.