Mistrust (34 page)

By now Reece and I have missed a chunk of the movie, but luckily it’s an easy film to catch up on. As I’m watching the movie, I feel a foreign warmth on my hand. Instantly I pull away tucking my hands under my opposite arms, while panic begins to consume me. My breathing increases as I tense and tremble.

Looking to Reece, he quickly steals the offending object back, and I notice he tried holding my hand. “I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“It’s okay.” A rock sits in the pit of my stomach, and I feel terrible for reacting so badly toward him.

With the film now forgotten, I keep a watchful eye on Reece and notice how he’s shifted as far away from me as possible.

I can’t lead him on; it’s not fair to him. But at the same time, he does something to me. He makes my heart spike with happiness when I see him, my pulse races and those butterflies flutter like crazy. But it’s not fair to him, to give him false hope that he can have a relationship with me. It’s obvious that’s what he wants, or what he wants to try for. If he wanted just sex, he wouldn’t be going to all the effort he is. He wouldn’t want my sister and her boyfriend around, and he wouldn’t be happy to simply spend time with me.

Am I being selfish? I really enjoy hanging out with him, but I can’t give him what he wants. He’s a guy, and I’m sure if he wants a relationship from me, then there’s no way I can offer him sex. I just can’t. I’m not ready for that step, and I’m not sure if I’ll ever be ready for it.

The damn emotional part of my brain is screaming how worthless I am to him. How I have nothing to offer him because I’m damaged goods. Damn it! Stop thinking about it. He wouldn’t want a relationship with me. He just wants sex.

“Are you okay?” It’s now my turn to be restless and shift in my seat.

“I’m fine,” I snap at Reece. Closing my eyes I tilt my head so he can’t see me and take a few deep breaths to get back in control of my stupid emotions. Once I’ve managed to calm myself down, I lean toward Reece and whisper, “I’m sorry.”

If Reece wanted nothing more than sex, he would’ve hit on me ages ago. He wouldn’t have gone to all this effort. He would’ve tried the night he beat Levi at the charity basketball game. He wouldn’t have waited.

And I
do
like him. He’s shown himself to be caring and sweet. He’s kept his hands to himself and not tried to force anything on me. I’m so torn. I like him, I do, but I don’t think I could ever be enough for him. If we do take a step toward a relationship, how long will he be willing to wait for it to become physical?

Levi made it perfectly clear to me, he didn’t have the patience to wait. And I really have to be fair to Reece.

Reece smiles at me then shifts again in his seat, sitting squarely instead of moving as far away from me as he can. He turns his head to watch the big screen, and puts his hand on the arm rest between us. He looks uncomfortable like this, but at the same time I know what he’s doing.

He’s giving me the option to hold his hand if I want to. Reece is leaving it to me to decide, without putting any pressure on me. His big hand is on the arm rest, between us; he’s making no more effort to touch me, probably because of my initial bad reaction.

Moving my hands, I place them back on my lap. My head is turned forward, pretending to watch the movie, while I try to sneakily look at Reece’s reaction. I inch my hand over, only enough for it to be resting on my outer thigh.

I can’t do it. I can’t bring myself to touch him and to give him false hope. Pulling my hand back, I knit them both together in my lap and hold them there. Reece’s hand doesn’t falter, he doesn’t move away.

Damn it, why does he have to be so understanding?

Slowly I unravel my hands, and shaking, I begin to move one toward his. My throat becomes dry as I nervously draw closer to his. I can feel he’s looking at me, and watching for me to take his hand.

Swallowing down the dryness in my mouth, I inch my hand closer to his. Gradually I extend my shaky pinky, only just reaching his. He too stretches his pinky out. Deliberately slow, our pinkies meet, barely touching.

My body reacts by shivering and cold goosebumps pebble my skin while I try to breathe normally through this monumental obstacle I’ve overcome. Relaxing into his touch I move my hand closer to his, the length of our pinkies touching together.

Reece moves his finger on top of mine, hooking them together.

Watching the screen, I breathe through the intense anguish bubbling away beneath my pebbled skin. I don’t want to pull away; I like the warmth of his touch. I even like how he’s curved his little finger over mine.

It feels comfortable, it feels
right.

There’s not much left of the movie, but suddenly I find myself paying attention to it. Reece’s finger entwined with mine isn’t stressing me out as much as I had built up in my mind. I had stressed myself out, completely making a huge deal out of something which has turned out to be nice.

When the lights in the cinema turn on, Reece’s body becomes rigid as he looks around the huge room. There’s a steady line of people already shuffling out. Sam stands and turns around, her eyes going straight to where Reece and I are holding hands, or I should say, holding pinkies. Her face brightens with a giant smile when her eyes lock on our hands.

“Huh, look what we have here, my former best friend, and the slut I was dating. Two love birds by the looks of things.” The voice pierces me and makes me cringe.
And to think, I thought I was in love with him.

“Levi,” Reece declares as he stands and steps in front of me.

Trying to look out from behind Reece, I catch a glimpse of Levi peering at me, his eyes narrow and his mouth is pressed into a thin line. I stand and move so I’m beside Reece, however he angles his body so he’s still shielding me.

“What do you want?” Reece asks.

“That slut isn’t worth our time,” Lindsey calls out from beside Levi. I hadn’t noticed her until she spoke. She has a hand on her jutted hip, with an eyebrow cocked high.

“How are you Lindsey?” Sam asks while waving her phone in her hand.

Lindsey’s face flushes a flaming shade of red, and Sam cheekily smiles at her. Lindsey steps back behind Levi, trying to disappear behind him.

Levi’s face morphs into a snarl while his beady eyes roam my body. “Fucked her yet?” he spits toward Reece.

A low hiss rumbles through Reece and he grabs my hand and holds it tight. “Do
not
speak about her like that,” Reece warns in a dangerously low voice.

Levi’s jaw tenses as he stands to his full height. “What happened to you, man? You used to be cool, now you’re chasing after damaged goods.” His eyes stay focused on me, his entire demeanor trying to intimidate me.

“You happened. You became a dick who thinks it’s okay to treat girls like shit.”

The side of Levi’s mouth tugs up in a condescending smile. “Not all girls.” He leans out and swings his arm over Lindsey. “Just her.” He pointedly looks at me.

Reece’s hand softens as he lets mine go. He steps forward about to do or say something he may end up regretting. I maneuver my body in front of Reece’s and say to Levi, “I know you’re hurt because I wouldn’t have sex with you. But I promise you, Levi, I never betrayed you.”

Levi snarls at me, turns and leaves with no further words. This leaves me even more convinced he’s hurting because of what he’s seen in
those
photos.

“You okay?” Reece asks.

“I’m fine. Sorry you had to be part of it, and I’m even sorrier you and Levi aren’t friends anymore. I know it’s because of me.”

He reaches for my hand to hold, and while it’s different, it’s also okay. “You’re not the reason we’re not friends.
He’s
the reason.” He tightens his fingers around mine while he leads me out of the cinema.

“That was intense.” Sam chuckles from behind me.

“Did you see the look on Lindsey’s face when you held up the phone?” Taylor says with a laugh.

“What have you got on her?” Reece asks.

“Oh yeah, you don’t know. We were at the mall, and she was caught shoplifting,” I answer his question.

“When we get home, I’ll show you what I recorded,” Sam proudly announces.

“I’m intrigued. Let’s go get pizza and get back to your place where you can show me the video you took.”

When we get home, Mom and Dad are in the family room watching TV. Mom’s feet are up on Dad’s lap and he’s massaging them. Mom says we can have our dinner out back near the pool and offers to get us plates and sodas. Sam beats me to it, and tells Mom to stay where she is, we can look after ourselves.

“Your parents are pretty cool,” Reece says once we’ve settled out back.

“Yeah, I got to agree. They are.” I grab a slice of pizza.

“Show me this video you have.” Reece holds his hand out for Sam’s phone.

“It’s so funny. She kind of gets tackled by the security guard, look.” She brings it up on her phone, and although I can’t see it because Reece is watching it, I can hear everything going on.

From Lindsey shrieking like a banshee to the clicking sound of her heels as tries to get away from the security guard. “Shit.” Reece gasps, then chuckles. When Lindsey gets dragged back into the store, Sam stops playing the mini movie.

Looking over at Reece, I watch his face as he smiles and shakes his head. “I stole a little toy car when I was a kid. I asked Mom for it, but she said no, she couldn’t afford it, so I shoved it in my pocket when she wasn’t looking because I really wanted it. When we got to the car, Mom packed all the groceries away while I sat in my seat and took the car out of the packaging.”

“You did not,” I say clasping a hand over my mouth in shock.

“Trust me, I did. Anyway, Mom got in the car, and she looked behind her to reverse . . . aaaaand she saw the car I was playing with.” He looks bashful as he reminisces.

“Oh no,” I mumble. I look to Sam and Taylor and they’re both listening intently while devouring their pizza.

“I remember it like it was yesterday. She asked me in this scary, quiet voice, ‘Reece, where did that car come from?’ I shrugged and said it must’ve fallen into my pocket. God, the look on her face. She parked the car again, opened the back door, pulled me out and dragged me by my ear straight back into the store.”

“By your ear?” I squeak, horrified, yet strangely amused.

“By. My. Ear.” Reece shakes his head and rubs his palm over his ear. “Damn well hurt too.”

“What happened?” Taylor asks.

“She marched me into the store, made the girl call the manager over the loud speaker, the manager came down and Mom made me tell her what I did. By this stage I was a mess, bawling my eyes out and promising I’ll never steal again.”

“What did the manager say?” I ask completely intrigued.

“The manager said my apology was enough.”

“That’s good.”

“Yeah, but not good enough for Mom.” Reece shudders then swallows hard. I have a feeling, there’s a lot more of the story to be told. “Mom decided I hadn’t learned my lesson, so she asked the manager if I could use the loud speaker. She made me tell the entire store how old I was, and how I stole a toy car. Then she made me go to every person working on the registers and apologize to them for making their job difficult.”

“Oh my God,” I whisper, desperately trying to hold in the laughter.

“Far out, man. That’s so damn funny,” Sam says and laughs.

“Man, your mom is hardcore,” Taylor agrees.

“That wasn’t the end of it. To humiliate me even further, she asked the manager, if I could pay off the debt by tidying the shelves where the cars were. And then, to top it all off, she bought the car I stole and, made me pick my next favorite which she also bought. Then she had me go hand them in to the local church and tell them the cars were for a little boy who didn’t have toys.”

“Are you serious?” I ask. Reece’s mom sounds like she’s incredible.

“But, you know what? I’ve never stolen a thing again. Miles thought it was hilarious, and didn’t let me live it down for a long time. Still every now and then he hassles me about it. So I will say, if Mom was Lindsey’s mom, that video would’ve already been shown to every relative every friend, and shared all over social media too.”

“Our Mom would never do that,” Sam says looking at me.

“I don’t know about that. I think I can take on Reece’s mom,” Mom says from behind us. We all turn to stare at her, Reece has the most shocked look on his face, with his mouth gaping open and his eyes wide with surprise. “Us moms can get quite creative when we need to teach our kids a valuable lesson.”

“I don’t doubt it,” Sam mumbles under her breath.

“What was that, sweetheart? You want me to start working at the school so I can come sit with you at lunch every day and tell you how much I love you?” Mom envelops Sam in a huge hug, overly emphasizing how she certainly can embarrass us.

“I said, I think you’re great.” Sam’s face is squished against Mom’s stomach. Her mouth is distorted while Mom folds her into a bear hug to make a point.

Mom steps back and we can’t help but laugh when Sam flexes her jaw. “I came out here to see if you kids need anything.”