Moments (Breath of Life Book 3) (11 page)

"I'm not so sure about that."

"That's just your broken side talking. We are going to get you through this. I promise," she smiled. Duke gave a small smile. She made him feel better about his situation. She didn't think he was crazy, just stressed. Maybe he just needed to focus on himself, get himself better.

A buzzer went off. He didn't realize she set a timer. "So what should I do?"

"Well, let's meet again if you feel like you need to. What I want you to do it get through finals week, then take a vacation. Focus on you and your grief. Lean on any family and friends. They understand. Try taking some melatonin to help you sleep. Sleep does wonders for the mind and body."

"Thanks," he stood up and shook her hand. He didn't know how well he could unwind, but maybe a vacation was in order. Summer break was coming up. He could go fishing with Jack or Drew. He would ask around and see what's going on around town. Memorial weekend would be here right after finals, maybe he could just go camping.

He left the office feeling slightly better than he did earlier. He didn't feel quite as tormented but he had a feeling that this was just the beginning.

NINETEEN

Duke sighed as the final bell rang. Finals week was over and he was about two days away from being on summer vacation. He had a couple in-service days to wrap up the year. He smiled and said his goodbyes to the students as they filed out of his classroom.

Once the students were gone, he propped open his door and sat back at his desk. He wanted to start boxing away things from this year, organizing and finish grading the last of his essay finals. Final grades were due on Monday and he had some he still had to enter in.

A knock sounded and Duke turned his head. He smiled seeing Drew fill the frame.

"Please tell me that you aren't working when summer vacation just started."

Duke chuckled as he stood and hugged his friend. "Just wasting time. What are you doing here?"

"Drake and I thought it would be good for all of us guys to get together tonight and get silly."

"What guys?"

"Drake, Sage, me, you, and possibly Jack. He wants to come but if you don't want him there he was going to bow out. He said you two have been friendly but he knows that you aren't back to where you used to be."

Duke felt like an ass. Jack didn't know about Paxton's extracurricular activities. They hadn't seen each other since the night Jack interrupted them kissing and about to take it further, but he figured that was because she didn't want anything to happen that would ruin anything she had with Jack. Duke was still thankful Jack didn't see them actually kissing that night. "Jack can come, I think we need this night."

"I think you need this night more than any of us," Drew replied.

Duke nodded as he gathered his things, "This all can wait until Monday anyways." He grabbed the stack of
ungraded essays and put it in his folder that he always took home.

"So we were thinking of meeting up at someone's place and heading out in a taxi from there."

"We can meet at mine since Jack should be there unless he is with Pax at the cabin," he stood. "Maybe meet up at 8:30, pre-drink and then head out around 9ish?"

"Sounds good. I'll let the boys know."

Duke smiled as they fell into easy conversations as he locked up his classroom. Walking out, he felt like tonight may be the start of what he needed to decompress. Maybe Drew was right, he needed this night. He needed to have a sense of stability in his life. He needed to get out of his house and start living again. He was able to do it once after Ella, he should be able to do it again.

***

Duke climbed out of the cab. He stretched as he was waiting for the others to get out. They were standing in front of Athens. He looked over at Jack who hadn't said much to him. They were carefully keeping their distance from each other, like they were each feeling each other out to see where they really stood in their friendship. He was sure Jack would beat the living shit out of him if he knew that he was making moves on Paxton.

"Let's get this boys," Drake said as they headed towards the door of Athens.

Once inside, they went to the usual tables in the back by the dance floor. Setting their stuff down, Lexi came by. Duke smiled as she approached. "Well isn't this a surprise. I haven't seen all of you in here for awhile."

"Yeah, we finally were able to drag Duke out for a good ol' boys night," Drew laughed.

"Hey, I've come out before. It hasn't been that long."

Lexi laughed, she knew exactly how long it had been since he last went out. "What do you all want to drink?"

They all looked at each other. "Let's start with two pitchers of Guinness," Jack threw down his card. "Start me a tab and whatever the guys want, my treat."

"Whoa, slow down there big spender," Drake laughed. "Don't think you can get us drunk and take us home."

"You would only be so lucky," Jack chuckled.

Duke realized that maybe this night would actually be fun. Jack was genuinely trying at making this work. Duke needed to do the same. He needed to find time to talk to Jack one-on-one. Maybe not tonight, but they needed to clear the air, well as clear as it can get without confessing what he was really feeling about Paxton.

"Anything else?" Lexi looked around at the group. Everyone shook their heads.

"If Jack's paying that's good enough for now," Sage smiled. He patted Jack on the back silently telling him he might regret his decision to open a tab up for everyone.

"Alright, be back soon. Have fun boys," she winked at Duke and walked off to get their drinks put in.

"So Duke, you takin' her home tonight?" Sage elbowed him.

"Not sure, we will see where the night goes."

"Riiight," he winked.

"We are casual. Besides, she may already have plans
and
this is a boy's night. Let's just get drunk and have fun while we can, we are getting pretty old to be doing this," Duke smiled. Everyone started laughing and nodding their heads.

Lexi came back a short time later with two pitchers and glasses for everyone. She hung out for a few moments, joking with everyone. Duke saw her give him the knowing smile she put on when she wanted to meet later. He smiled, knowing that it was a possibility if he wanted it to be. He shrugged his shoulders before she walked off.

They started in on the pitchers while laughing and talking. Duke hadn't felt this free in a long time. It felt like old times. They were finishing their second set of pitchers when they decided to hit the dance floor. Drew and Drake had their eyes on some ladies out dancing their night away and the boys were ready to make their move. Duke could only laugh at them. He knew more than likely the group would start breaking up slowly as the guys found their hook ups. Jack and Sage however had ladies waiting on them at home, so they hung back with Duke as far as scouting girls out goes. Nobody said they couldn't dance with other ladies, but their agendas were different. Duke knew Lexi would be there for him later, so there was no point in scoping out the scene for a hook up. He only a dance partner.

Duke found a girl that was out with her friends, a bachelorette party. The bride-to-be was quite trashed by that point and so the guys just had a good time dancing with her as she enjoyed her last night of freedom. Duke noticed her friends weren't too bad looking either. As he was dancing with one of them, his thoughts halted as he found himself smiling and having a good time. It was the first time he was enjoying himself without someone reminding him of Ella. It was nice and so was his dance partner. She seemed to be into Duke and Duke liked that feeling even though she looked a little younger, probably late twenties. He had to admit being in his thirties and out partying like this would have to end sometime. In fact, he and the boys had started slowing down a bit. Tonight though, they were acting like they were in their twenties again. Some of them out on the prowl and others just enjoying themselves, knowing they had someone to go home to.

"Wanna get out of here later?" his dance partner interrupted his thoughts.

"Not a good idea sweetheart."

"Married or taken?" Duke could sense her disappointment.

"Neither, just hanging with my boys tonight."

She seemed to have taken that as a challenge. She scooted closer on the dance floor and pressed up against him. He sighed as he looked up. His body was responding to him. Hormones are hormones, he's a man and he just can't walk away from a body like this. He looked across the dance floor trying to reel himself in when he saw Jennah. He stepped back from the woman pressed against him and stared at Jennah in her skimpy outfit.

The nights were getting warmer and girl's outfits were getting shorter and more revealing, but what Jennah had on made the temperature in the room increase tenfold. She turned and spotted him, smiling. She continued dancing with her friends. Duke couldn't take his eyes off of her. She unknowingly was pulling him towards her, Paxton and Ella quickly fading from his thoughts. Images of him peeling off that short, black mini dress and leaving those leopard print heels on clouded his mind. That outfit would be at the center of any sane man's fantasy.

"Hey, what's wrong?" the girl he was dancing with asked.

"Nothing. I think it's time for me to take a break," he turned away before she could answer.

Duke headed back towards the table. He flagged down Lexi and ordered a crown and coke. He needed something a little stronger to keep the images of Jennah against him at bay. He was now scared that Ella might show up. It seemed like she always did when Duke was thinking about another woman.

"You okay?" Jack sat down by him. He had a look of concern on his face. "I saw that waitress friend of yours out there."

"It's not about Jennah, Jack."

"I think it is. I saw the moment you had out there. I just happened to look up."

"You don't know what you saw."

"You like her, don't you?"

Duke sighed. He knew there was no getting away from this conversation. Duke used to be able to tell him anything. Jack was his best friend, his brother. The best way to repair their friendship was to act like he could trust Jack with anything.

"I don't know."

"Come on, it's me man."

Duke huffed. Lexi came back and set his drink down in front of him. "Need anything Jack?"

"I'll have what he's having," Duke noticed Jack didn't take his eyes off of him. He was silently telling him that he wasn't letting this go.

"Great, I will be back as quick as I can," she smiled and patted Duke's leg. He didn't even realize her hand was there. Duke watched her walk off.

"She reminds me of Ella," Duke didn't look at Jack as he let the words slip past his lips.

"Who? Lexi?"

"No, Jennah. She reminds me of Ella. The way she sounds, her eyes, her look, some of her mannerisms. That outfit she has on tonight, I can see Ella wearing it, maybe with some different shoes. She never was a fan of leopard print. She screams Ella and it scares me." Duke looked over at Jennah still dancing on the floor. He knew that he had too much to drink because he was starting to pour his heart out and he didn't care. He remembered he had a few beers at the house before they left and he had quite a few here too. Now he switched to crown and coke.

Lexi came back and dropped off Jack's drink before she flitted off to another table. Athens was packed tonight. Jack took a long drink before he looked over at Duke who was still staring over at Jennah.

"She's not Ella."

"I know that Jack."

"I think you should stay away from her. No good is going to come of it. If you are having flashbacks of Ella, I would say that is dangerous territory."

"I know. She reminds me of the perfect life Ella and I had. We were so happy and in love. Jennah reminds me of the future I will never have, but I can't help but want to get close to her. I want that reminder. I want to remember every little thing about Ella and I'm afraid I will forget how perfect she was for me."

"Look at me Duke," Duke looked over at him not wanting to hear what Jack had to say, "She wasn't perfect, no one is."

Duke downed his drink. "Ella was perfect. She was everything to me."

"You are putting her on a pedestal. It's not healthy."

"Look, you are getting your happily ever after. Ella was mine and I just want her back."

"That's not possible. She's gone Duke. She can't come back."

"No, but Jennah could be a close second."

"Because you want her to be?"

"I'm done with this conversation." Duke didn't want to be lectured tonight. He walked out on the dance floor and located Jennah. He would prove Jack wrong. Ella was perfect and Jennah was so much like Ella that he knew she would be the same. Jennah could be good for him. She would get him out of his stupor.