More Than I Can Bear (22 page)

This wasn't the first time Paige had found herself waiting in an attorney's conference room. The last time she sat in one she'd been on the same team as Blake. The woman he knew as his estranged mother tried to sue him for a ridiculous amount of money. Back then Blake had lost that battle. Paige was hoping for a repeat and that she would be the victor.

Paige thought she'd throw up while in the conference room the receptionist had directed her to in order to wait for the attorneys to arrive. No, maybe she'd die of suffocation from hyperventilation, if that was at all possible. Maybe she'd drown in the sweat she couldn't manage to keep under control. If it weren't for the fact she needed to live for her two daughters, she'd rather just die. But it was her daughters she was fighting for. Her daughters were the reason why she was going through such agony, at least one of them anyway. Adele. She had to protect Adele from the man she now considered a monster at all cost.

First thing Monday morning after receiving that letter from Blake's attorney, Paige had called the attorney and set up an appointment for that Wednesday to meet with him. That Saturday upon finding out about Blake's release and intentions toward Adele, Paige's mother had calmed her down; well, the two had managed to calm each other down, enough to have a conversation with clear minds. The result of the conversation was the two coming to the conclusion that Paige would stop assuming the worst and just hear the attorney out as far as Blake's desires.

“Maybe Blake really doesn't want Adele. Maybe he's just trying to scare you or get back at you for the years he spent in prison. He really probably just wants all his money back from that divorce settlement,” Mrs. Robinson had reasoned. “You know how that man was when it came to money and the love of it. It truly was the root of all evil in his case. He put that clause in the divorce decree for a reason. He wasn't going to rest until he found a way to convince the world you'd cheated with Norman, and get his money back in return by doing so.”

That had all made sense to Paige. It absolutely was a possibility. Blake knew that proving that she had committed adultery would void their divorce settlement and Paige would owe the monies back to him. That hadn't worried Paige. She'd give up that money in a heartbeat if it meant keeping Blake out of the early years of Adele's life. And that was her goal today. Wednesday could not have gotten here fast enough. Now neither could those darn attorneys.

Keeping hope alive, Paige had abandoned her idea of packing up the girls and leaving the country. But it wasn't something she wouldn't revisit if things didn't go as planned today in her meeting with Blake's attorney. As a matter of fact, it was still an option. She was alone. She could stand up and walk out of that conference room at any moment without anyone stopping her. Without anyone trying to reason with her. Not even her own conscience and certainly not the voice of God. She'd tuned that out for once and for all.

As if having an out-of-body experience, Paige stood. She walked over to the conference room door and placed her hand on the doorknob. She'd kept a couple gifts from Blake, who was now her sworn enemy. She'd keep one from God as well. She'd keep the free will He'd given her. And she'd use it—now.

Paige ran into her house without even closing the front door. In her four
-
inch heels, she made her way straight toward her basement door, flung it open, and barreled down the flight of steps.

“Uggghhh,” Paige said as she missed the last step and landed flat on her bottom on the hard concrete. Why hadn't she gotten the basement finished? Had she, she would have at least landed on carpet with some padding underneath it. Her back rammed into the edge of the step, shooting unbearable pain up her spine. In tremendous pain, she wished she could just sit there and wallow in it until it went away
. . .
until it became at least bearable. But she'd tried that in life before, and each time the pain never seemed to go away, or was replaced by something even more painful. Besides that, she had no time to spare. Once her attorney arrived in that conference room to find that she was no longer waiting, he'd surely put two and two together and come looking for her. But she'd be gone, long gone. Her and her two girls gone forever.

Limping over to the storage area of her basement, Paige proceeded to push, move, and throw boxes and plastic containers filled with out
-
of
-
season clothing, Christmas decorations, and other miscellaneous items out of her way. Paige collected the luggage set she'd been digging for. No, it wasn't Louis Vuitton, but it would hold the small pieces of her and her daughters' lives that she could manage to fit in them.

She flung the medium
-
sized suitcase and carryon onto the top landing and went after the large suitcase. With the lone suitcase in hand, she made it back to the top of the steps and threw it down. Paige grabbed the carryon and proceeded to hit the girls' bathroom and her private bathroom, filling it with all the toiletries and necessities she felt they needed to get through the next couple days at least. Once she'd done that, she dragged the larger suitcase into the girls' room and filled it with as many undergarments and outfits of the girls she could. Last but not least, the medium
-
sized suitcase she filled with as many of her belongings as she could.

Paige breathed in, exhaled, and then headed up the basement steps. She'd done it. She'd managed to pack up as much of her and her girls' life into her SUV in record time. With keys in hand, she powerwalked to the front door, placed her hand on the screen doorknob, and opened the door
. . .
only to find him standing there.

“Jesus Christ you scared me,” Paige said once she'd opened the conference room door and found her attorney standing there.

“I'm sorry, Paige,” Rudy Fergunstein, Paige's attorney, said as he entered the conference room Paige had been waiting in the last few minutes per the receptionist's instructions. “I'm late as well. My court hearing ran over.” Rudy was a small—Kevin Hart small—soft, yet very well-spoken man. He wasn't the least bit intimidating in stature, but his knowledge of the law and the legal system wasn't to be reckoned with. Rudy definitely knew his way around the law the same way a fat kid knew his way around a bakery. Rudy was very intelligent and always played by the rules. He felt one didn't have to play dirty in order to come out clean. Seeing him standing there reminded Paige to play clean and by the rules. Although just seconds ago she envisioned successfully going back to her house, gathering her and her girls' belongings, and fleeing town with them, it wasn't the right thing to do. It would only come back to haunt her. She had to trust in Rudy's skills to get her through this. That's all she had left.

“No problem, Rudy. Thank you for coming through for me last minute. It's great to see you again.”

Paige hadn't seen Rudy since he helped her file for divorce from Blake. He was working for legal aid then. Now he had his own family practice firm with his brother and sister as partners. He'd made sure Paige remained on his mailing list, sending out postcards and letters at least once a year. Paige felt indebted to Rudy for his free services and support back in the day. She promised if she ever got in a position where she needed legal representation, Rudy would be her man. She'd patronize him without second thought. The minute she'd gotten off of the phone with Blake's attorney, she'd called up Rudy. Now here he stood ready to help her at perhaps the fight of her life, and unknowingly, arriving just in time to have stopped her from doing something she could have possibly lived to regret.

“I asked Mr. Dickenson's attorney to give me a minute with you to go over some things,” Rudy said, taking a file and spreading it out on the conference room table as he sat down next to Paige. “We have several options we can entertain, but first we need to hear exactly what your ex-husband is seeking: custody, partial custody, full custody with child support, or just the return of his money paid to you in the divorce settlement. Who knows? But I do want you to know that you do, in fact, have options. I don't want you to feel weak and powerless in your situation. You have power, Paige,” he said sincerely.

“Well that makes me feel a little better.” Paige exhaled and allowed her tense shoulders to somewhat relax.

“I'm not saying this just to make you feel better. It's the truth. In all honesty, I don't see any judge taking a child away from its mother and giving it to a felon fresh out of jail, a child who doesn't know the man from Adam.”

Paige nodded. That's another thing she hadn't taken into consideration. Thank goodness for Rudy. The five minutes Rudy was able to spend with Paige to go over some possibilities wasn't a lot of time, but it was enough to let Paige know that Blake had major strikes against him. The ball truly was in her court, and Blake couldn't just come onto her home court and try to steal it. And neither did she necessarily have to pass him the ball. Not that she considered this a game or Adele a ball. There was far more at stake.

“Mrs. Vanderdale,” Blake's attorney, Randall, started when he entered the room. “We meet again.” He was the same attorney who had represented Blake in the suit between Blake and his mother.

“We do.” Paige nodded, trying not to be the image of the stereotypical angry black woman Randall had once witnessed her to be. The kind Norman's mother thought all women of color were thanks to those reality shows. She smiled and willed herself to remain cordial versus hold it against the man for having the nerve to represent someone like Blake, a known felon. A known violent felon.

She did hope, though, that she didn't have to kick off her shoes and run across that conference room table and get at the man if he wasn't talking right.

“Rudy, my man.” Blake's attorney shook hands with Paige's attorney. “Haven't seen you since the bar association shindig. How's the wife and kids?”

“The wife is fine. Just one kid. Junior is well,” Rudy replied.

“Good, good,” he said while flipping through a file he carried, showing just how disinterested he truly was in Rudy's wife and kid. “So, first things first, as I'm sure none of us have time to waste. Adele. She wasn't born premature was she?” He stared right at Paige.

“Well, uh . . .” For a split second Paige wanted to lie. She wanted to let out a big, fat “Yes! She was born three months early . . . maybe four.” She could tell already which road Blake's no-good attorney was about to travel before he even put the car in drive and his foot on the gas pedal. A lie would have shut him down. Paige could have easily lied and said she'd gotten pregnant later, after her last sexual encounter with Blake, but that she'd had the baby early. But Rudy nodding for Paige to go ahead and tell the truth put a stop to it.
Rudy to the rescue yet again.
“She was pretty much born on her due date.”

“You married a Mr. Norman Vanderdale . . . what, the same month your divorce was final?” Randall said it as if that made Paige the lowest of all jezebels.

“I did,” Paige said with her head held high.
This man is not going to break me down.

“Hmmm. Talk about shotgun wedding.” Blake's attorney laughed.

“If you don't mind,” Rudy interrupted, “can we just get to exactly what it is that your client wants since he chose not to show up himself?”

Blake's attorney smirked at Rudy and then turned his attention to Paige. “Mrs. Vanderdale, during the divorce hearing you were under oath, correct?” It was obvious this man loved to dance around because he certainly had on his dancing shoes and was a master at the two-step.

“Yes. That's correct,” Paige replied.

“And during the divorce hearing you were asked several questions under oath? Correct?”

“Come on; what is this? My client isn't on trial here. What's up with the theatrical cross-examination?” Rudy interrupted, just about fed up with his counterpart's dramatic tactics. He was a trial lawyer and it showed.

“No, she's not on trial. Not yet anyway.” Blake's attorney let a devilish grin spread across his lips.

“Paige, please just answer the man's question so we can move on,” Rudy said, shaking his head.

Paige did as she was instructed. “Yes, I was asked several questions,” Paige said. “Like my attorney said, can we please just get on with this?”

Blake's attorney nodded. “Certainly.” He scanned a paper and continued. “I actually pulled the transcript from the divorce hearing between you and my client. One of the questions the judge asked you was whether you knew yourself to be pregnant at the time of the divorce. And you answered this question under oath, did you not?” His eyes darted knowingly back and forth between Paige and her attorney.

Right then and there Paige thought she was going to throw up. A pain swept through her gut that felt like she'd made the wrong move on the dance floor with Blake's attorney and he'd stomped her foot. Hard. And she'd been wearing an open-toe shoe.

When Paige looked to Rudy and his face looked as if he'd eaten a rotten apple four weeks ago and now it was filled with maggots, she knew this wasn't looking good.

Blake's attorney didn't hide the fact that he was getting a thrill out of this by his smug expression. “By the look on both of your faces, I can see the two of you know exactly where this is heading.” He had victory written all over his face. “Lying under oath is a very serious charge. You do know that if you told the judge you weren't pregnant at the time of the divorce and you really were . . .” He shook his head and let out a tsk.

Paige, in her heart, knew that she had not knowingly lied under oath. She'd absolutely had no idea that she was pregnant when she'd stood before that judge and stated such. But with the whole shotgun marriage to Norman before the ink even dried on the divorce papers, she'd have a hard time proving that to any jury of her peers. No one would believe her. No judge, no jury. She'd end up in jail for sure. By the time she got out, Adele would probably be in the custody of her father, her biological father, Blake! Just that thought put Paige into such a panic that she began to spurt out words without first consulting her attorney.

“What do you want? The money from the divorce settlement back? For me to announce to the world that I cheated on Blake, and therefore he had every right to be upset and beat me and rape me? Huh? Is that what you want?” Paige cried, standing and hitting the table with her fist.

“Paige, please, don't say another word,” Rudy tried to warn her.

Paige ignored his plea. “Because if that's what you want, that's what you can have,” Paige said. “I don't care. He can have every dime and then some. Just please don't take my daughter from me. Please.” Paige wept like a baby as she melted back down into her seat.

Rudy placed his hand on Paige's shoulder to try to calm her down . . . and to remind her that he was there to do the talking for her. Although it was just a tad bit late for that. It was a turnover. Looked like Team Blake now had the ball.

Blake's attorney just sat there stoic. It was killing him not to display his excitement of seeing Paige break down. After a few seconds of having a stare down with Paige he finally spoke. “Are you finished, Mrs. Vanderdale?”

Breathing deeply, Paige realized she'd made a scene. She hadn't taken off her shoes and run across the conference table, nor thrown the pitcher of water that sat in the middle of the table at Blake's attorney. But she wouldn't be telling the truth if she said there wasn't a part of her that wanted to. She swallowed and held her head up high, even though she really wanted to just crawl up under the table.

Blake's attorney stood and took the floor. “Your daughter, Adele. She's an heir to the Vanderdales, as in Norman Vanderdale Sr. who took over his wife's family business?” He looked to Paige. “Hmmm. You hit the jackpot didn't you? You know, I can't blame you one way or the other for getting your deceased husband, God rest his soul, to sign that child's birth certificate. You certainly get to wear the crown of gold diggers.” He laughed.

“Okay, that's it!” Paige stood and had bent over to remove her shoe before Rudy stopped her.

“Please, Paige. I think it's a fine time you let me do what you're paying me to do. Let me do all the talking from now on. Please. Okay?” His eyes pleaded with Paige to just be quiet and trust him.

With eyes shooting daggers and steam flushing out her ears, Paige silently agreed as she sat back down.

Rudy exhaled and straightened his tie. He then gave Blake's attorney his full attention. “Look, first of all I didn't come here for you to insult my client,” Rudy said in a stern tone, one he didn't even know he had in him. It was a tone that immediately captured the opposing attorney's attention. “Now either you tell us what you want so we can work something out that satisfies both parties, or do what you have to do. Like you said, Mrs. Vanderdale here isn't wanting for money. She hit the jackpot with the Vanderdales who are well-loved and recognized members of the community. They are honest God-fearing people who have an excellent relationship with not only their grandchildren, but the mother of their grandchildren. As a matter of fact”—he turned to Paige—“don't you and Mrs. Vanderdale attend church together?”

Paige nodded as she watched Rudy in astonishment do his thing. This kitten was turning into a roaring lion right in front of her face.

Rudy directed his words back to Blake's attorney. “And don't think for one minute the Vanderdales won't spend every dime of their money seeing to it that by the end of this, both you and your client will make Satan look like Shirley Temple. Your client is a rapist, a woman beater, and a man who slept with his wife's best friend. He's now HIV-positive. Now I typically don't play dirty, but since you invited me into your pig pen, I might as well sling a little mud.”

Paige didn't realize a huge smile was on her face and the voice in her head was cheering Rudy on.
Get him. Get him good!

Rudy continued, “So you have five seconds to lay it all out on the table or you'll be figuring out how to explain why your client knowingly slept with this woman knowing he was HIV-positive. It was his way of getting back at her. It was attempted murder.”

“That's a lie and you know it!” Blake's attorney stood, wagging a finger at Rudy.

“Prove it!” Rudy spat.

Paige sat on the edge of her seat in excitement. Oh how the lion was roaring.

Rudy continued his roaring. “The same way my client will have to prove that she had no idea she was pregnant at the time of the divorce hearing, your client will have to prove that he didn't know he was HIV-positive and had set out to destroy this woman's life by purposely trying to infect her with it. This woman has had to take test after HIV test and has been mentally affected by it tremendously. Oh my, and if at the time your client had sex with my client against her will knowing he was infected with HIV, and she in fact was pregnant at the time, I guess that would make it two counts of attempted murder. Jesus, this could be a huge mess! Isn't that right?” he said to Blake's attorney, who stood speechless with his mouth gaped open.

Well, Rudy had done it. He'd managed to silent Blake's attorney. Looked like the dog's bark had been far worse than his bite. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he tried to speak.