More Than Rum (The Maple Leaf Series Book 3) (2 page)

Then Hope’s bottomless brown
gaze lifted to Adam’s lips. “You’re bleeding.”

Adam ran his tongue over the
split and winced at the sting. “Hardly.”

She slid off the stool and
grabbed a few paper towels from under the bar. Without saying a word, she
moistened them at the sink and squeezed them out. She stepped up next to Adam,
and he held his breath as she looked at his lips again. He would have paid big
money to know what she was thinking at that moment. Her jaw was tightly set,
but her deep brown eyes were warm and her lips were full, maybe even waiting
for something. Something he could give them. Something he
wanted
to give
them.

But I’m not ready.

He’d tried to be. Months ago.
When he’d first met Hope at his buddy Orion Finley’s house. They’d hung out a
few times at this very bar in fact, but it had been too soon for Adam. Ghosts
from his time as a Marine in Afghanistan plagued him at night. If he were being
honest, they beat the crap out of him during the day too. Every time he
blinked. Every time he drew in a breath. Every time his heart beat.

There was no escape.

So, he’d done the only thing he
could think of. He buried himself in his lumberjacking. People pointed out the
trees they wanted taken down, and he wielded his chainsaw like a mighty sword.
That was the thing about lumberjacking. Every fight was a victory for Adam. The
trees never won. He never lost any members of his squad. He never had to hear
their screams. He never had to smell their blood. The trees dropped to the
ground and allowed him to do as he pleased. He always met his mission goals
while lumberjacking, and he filled in the rest of his time with making
furniture for folks.

He’d had some hope for a little
while: a scientific study the government was conducting for victims of
post-traumatic stress disorder. He’d signed up as soon as he’d heard about it.
Said toodles to his sister, Wendie, adios to Orion, and gave his parents down
in Florida a super quick call. He’d packed little and took off to Nevada for
the experimental treatment with high expectations.

All he’d gotten was
disappointment.

Once fucked up, always
fucked up.

Shitty situation, but he
couldn’t shake it. And he certainly couldn’t ask a perfectly wonderful woman
like Hope Stannard to tolerate the mess he’d become.

So, he’d done the mature thing
and… avoided her.

Looking at her now though, as
she rose to her tiptoes and pressed the wet paper towels to his busted lip, he
forgot why avoiding her had seemed like the right course of action.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “If
you hadn’t shown up…” She let the sentence go unfinished as she shivered.

Put your arms around her,
idiot.

That was what he should have
done. Anyone could see it was what she needed, maybe even what she wanted, but
he couldn’t lead her on. He couldn’t pretend they could have something between
them. He was too broken. Just too broken.

“Do you want me to call Rick to
drive you home?” Jake asked, already on his way to get the phone.

Adam closed his fingers around
Hope’s wrist and gently tugged so the paper towel was no longer soothing his
lip. “I’ll take her.” He couldn’t be sure, but it sounded as if those words
came out of his own mouth.

Hope smiled, but it was a sad
one—one that put a few cracks in Adam’s armor. “That’s okay, fellas. I’m all
set.” She studied the bloody paper towel in her hand for a silent moment then
walked to the trash bin and tossed it. “I’ll be sure to get my keys out while
I’m still
inside
the building like any smart woman would do. You’d think
I never watched television or something. Obviously a woman in a dark parking
lot is asking for trouble.”

“No one asks for trouble,” Adam
said.

She shrugged ever so slightly,
making her straight blonde hair slide over her left shoulder. His fingers
itched to touch those silky strands, but he jammed his hands into the pockets
of his jacket instead.

Glancing at his lip, which
actually did feel better after she’d tended to it, Hope said, “Nice to see you,
Adam. Thanks again.”

Before he could decide he
shouldn’t let her leave, she’d bid Jake farewell and was gone.

Adam felt Jake’s eyes on him.
“What?” He licked at his lip, wondering how big the slice was.

“You’re goin’ to go after her,
ain’t you?” The man rubbed his beard as if he were watching an alien species or
a moron making a grave mistake.

“Probably not the best idea.”

“Why the hell not? I saw the
way she looked at you.” Jake stepped toward the door as if he were going to
make sure Hope got to her car without incident. Blue and red lights flickered
in the front windows, signaling the police had pulled into the lot, so Jake led
Adam to a booth in the corner of the empty tavern instead.

Adam slid into the seat across
from Jake and shed his jacket after putting his baseball cap back on. The cap
Hope had retrieved for him. “She has no business looking at me.”

“Maybe so, but—”

Adam held up a hand. “Look, I’m
here for an interview, right? Let’s get that underway.”

Jake studied him. “If you don’t
know how to act ’round the ladies, I’m not sure you can handle bartendin’,
kid.”

“I can handle it.” Bartending
was simple. It was
life
Adam couldn’t handle.  

Fortunately, a police car
zipped into the parking lot when Hope stepped out of the tavern. That didn’t
leave her time to get all paranoid and relive the attack frame by frame. It
also didn’t afford her the opportunity to analyze the fact that Adam hadn’t
walked her out. He’d swooped in to her rescue and accepted her attention to his
split lip, but that was it. He wasn’t going to give her more.

A shame.

With his blond buzz cut, hazel
eyes, and Marine body, Hope definitely wanted more. They’d gone on a couple
dates, mostly with Sage and Orion, who were now engaged and ridiculously happy
together, and her cousin Rick and his new wife, Lily. Hope was definitely
beginning to feel like the Official Unmarriable Old Maid of the group.

The time she’d spent with Adam
had been… nice. They’d had dinner, drinks, a couple rounds of pleasurable
kissing, but he held back. Hope could feel it in the way he was always careful
not to touch her too much, not to let his kisses linger, not to move them to
the next level.

There was something Adam wasn’t
telling her.

Damned if she was going to poke
and prod for the big secret though. He could hide under his baseball cap all he
wanted. He’d either tell her what was going on with him or he wouldn’t. It
didn’t make a difference.

Except that it does.

Sighing, Hope walked toward the
police car as two officers got out. She instantly recognized them as the officers
who had handled the craziness Orion’s ex-wife had caused him a few months back.
The Stannard crew had kept in touch with the officers after they’d solved the
case and helped Orion get custody of his daughter, Myah.

“Evening, Hope,” Kevin said.

“Are you okay?” Diana folded
Hope into a hug.

“I’m fine. Not a scratch on
me.” She looked at the officers. “Thanks to Adam.”

“File that under
Interesting
,
right?” Diana gave Hope a little nudge with her elbow.

“Extremely.” Hope rubbed her
own hands up and down her arms. The purple fleece jacket she wore wasn’t doing
the job of keeping her warm anymore. She wanted to say the weather had gotten
colder since this afternoon, but knew that wasn’t true aside from a few degrees
or so. The cold she now felt came from the inside. Chilled over being attacked.
Frozen by Adam’s not so friendly reappearance.

She sifted out a long breath.
“So I suppose you two need a statement.”

“We do love to collect them,” Kevin
said.

“I’ll follow you down to the
station,” she said. “I’d rather not take this… event home to my mother’s
house.”

“Roger that,” Kevin said. “You
all right to drive?”

Hope nodded and gave the
officers a wave. She liked how neither of them budged until she was behind the
wheel in her Jeep.

Vermont’s finest.

With a glance back to the
tavern front doors, part of her hoping Adam would come storming out and wrap
her in a big, protective hug, she let loose another sigh and pulled out of the
parking lot. The police car followed immediately behind her, and Hope kept an eye
on her speedometer for the entire drive to the St. Jamesbury station. Nothing
more unsettling than having a police escort when adhering to the speed limit
wasn’t one of your strong points.

Getting attacked was perhaps
more unsettling. Just a bit.

Hope rolled her shoulders and
stretched her neck as she pulled into the police station parking lot. Kevin and
Diana drove past her and parked their squad car, but she didn’t get out of her
vehicle until they walked toward her, which made her mad. Waiting for them
suggested that perhaps maybe possibly she was a wee bit… what was the word she
was searching for?

Uneasy?

Uncertain?

Un-brave?

Take your pick. She knew she
wasn’t the brave one in the Stannard clan. She wasn’t sassy and bold like Sage.
Hope almost never said exactly what was on her mind. She also wasn’t strong
like her mother Joy, who had raised two of her own children plus her nephew
without any help from anyone else. She certainly wasn’t braver than Rick, who
had survived a heart attack at a young age.

Nope. She was Hope. The person
people often described as
nice
,
kind
,
quiet
. All perfectly
great words until they made you invisible.

Kevin and Diana escorted her up
the stairs of the St. Jamesbury police station and into a room with a small
table and two chairs. Diana gestured to one chair and Hope sat. Taking the
chair opposite her while Kevin stood nearby, Diana powered up a tablet and
prepared to take Hope’s statement.

Running the scenario over in
her mind, Hope shuddered in her seat. She zipped her fleece jacket up higher.

“I’ll get you a coffee,” Kevin
said.

“Thanks.”

He offered her a small smile
then left.

“He’s a good partner,” Hope
said.

Diana pursed her lips. “He has
his moments.”

They spent the next twenty
minutes going over what happened at the tavern. Hope could only positively
identify her attacker’s rough gloves and the smell of his jacket, having not
gotten a clear view of his face in the darkness.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

Diana looked up. “For what?”

“That I didn’t get a good look
at him.”

“It’s not going to matter.
We’ve got the bastard in custody already, and Adam did get a good look at him.”
Diana tapped the screen of her tablet then handed it off to Kevin. “Take care
of this, will you, handsome?”

Kevin grinned and gave Hope a
nod before leaving.

At Hope’s raised brow, Diana
said, “It’s more likely Sencotte will do what I ask him to if I compliment
him.” She shook her head. “Doesn’t matter if I mean it or not.”

“But you do, don’t you?” Hope
leaned forward, wishing for a juicy tidbit to take her mind off everything that
loitered in her skull.

“I guess he’s not bad to look
at. If you have to be stuck with a partner in the tight confines of a squad
car, why not with an over-six-foot male specimen, right?” Diana gave her a sly
smile, one black-brown eye winking.

“I want to know more about
this.”

Diana waved a finger then
hooked her curly jet-black hair behind her ear. “No way. This is top secret. I
will throw your ass in jail if you suggest in front of anyone that I spend a
part of each work day imagining Sencotte naked.”

Hope burst out laughing, and
Diana joined in until Kevin came back and stared at them as if they were out of
their minds.

“What did I miss?” he asked,
which only made them laugh harder. “Well, I’m glad everyone is so jovial.” He
frowned, and Hope could see why Diana might think he was cute. Not your
standard handsome either. He had full lips but they were slightly askew, giving
his face the hint of a smile at all times. Except when he was playing the bad
cop, which Hope had seen before the two police officers had gotten to know
Orion and Sage. And Diana was right—Kevin was tall, the monochrome coloring of
the St. Jamesbury Police Department’s uniform emphasizing the fact that he was
one long line of crime-fighting muscle.

Damn.
Part of Hope
wished she had noticed how hot Officer Kevin Sencotte was earlier.   

“We’re all done here, right?”
he asked Diana.

“Yep.” Diana grabbed Hope’s
hand on the table. “Do you want to hang out or something? My shift is done.”

Hope squeezed her hand.
“Thanks, Diana, but you guys have done enough by catching that jerk. I’m fine.”
At Diana’s long stare, she added, “Honest. I’m okay.”

Diana slid her hand off Hope’s
and stood. “If you’re sure.”

“I am. It was a fluke thing. I
mean, think about all the times we’ve been in and out of Black Wolf Tavern
without any incident at all. The chances of what happened today ever happening
again are slim.” Hope hiked her purse up onto her shoulder and stood as well.

“Statistically, you’re right,” Kevin
said, “but mentally, your brain might try to fuck with you later.” He rested a
hand on Hope’s shoulder. “Don’t let it.”

“Aye-aye.” She saluted him then
accepted Diana’s hug. “Thanks again, guys.”

“Adam did the hard part,” Kevin
said.

And here I was almost
forgetting about Adam.

Forgetting about Adam. That
appeared to be something her mind couldn’t quite accomplish.  

****

“What the hell happened to your
lip?” Adam’s sister, Wendie, walked clear across his living room and cupped his
face in her hands.

“It’s nothing.” He squirmed
free of her grip and changed the channel on the television.

“It doesn’t
look
like
nothing, Little Bro. Let me have a look.” She tugged at his long-sleeved
camouflaged T-shirt, but he swatted her hand away. “I said I’m fine.”

“No, you didn’t. What you said
was, ‘It’s nothing.’ You never said you were fine.”

He knew his nurse sister meant
well, but he was seriously picturing his hands around her neck right now.
“Wendie, please, can I just watch this?”

She looked over her shoulder at
the television. “Oh, because this episode of
The Big Bang Theory
can’t
wait a few moments?”

“No. It can’t.”

Couldn’t Wendie feel his bad
mood? It was like a third person in the room with them. He didn’t even know why
he felt this wretched. He’d done a good thing by helping Hope. When he thought
about all the ways that incident could have ended, his fists tightened and his
teeth clenched. How could anyone
attack
Hope? She was… she was…

What is she?

Adam didn’t have the right
word, but Hope Stannard was something. Something he wanted. Something his life
was definitely missing.

“Something you wouldn’t know
what to do with,” he said.

“Huh?” Wendie angled her head
at him. “Adam, seriously. You’re acting weird even for you. Please tell me what
happened today.”

When he slid his gaze to his
sister’s concerned face, he scrubbed a hand down his face and shut off the
television. “Some asshole attacked Hope Stannard outside Black Wolf Tavern.”

Wendie popped off the couch
where she’d been sitting beside him. “Attacked? Is she okay?”

“She’s fine. I got there in
time to rip the jackass off her before he could… before…” He waved his hand,
hoping to God Wendie would be able to come to the logical conclusion on her
own, because he couldn’t say it out loud.

His sister’s eyes widened. “Jesus
Christ, Adam. Good thing you were there.”

Yeah, such a hero.
He
didn’t feel like a hero.

“Did that douchebag do that to
your lip?” She gestured to the split that had finally stopped bleeding about an
hour ago. Now it stung if he smiled. Good thing he didn’t plan on doing much of
that tonight.

Or ever.

“He got in one punch,” Adam
said. “Kevin and Diana hauled him away. His address is the St. Jamesbury police
station.”

“Good.” Wendie leveled her gaze
on him. “And seeing Hope was…”

Adam shrugged. “I don’t know.”
Wonderful.
Exciting. Depressing.

“Oh, Adam.” She sat next to him
on the couch and rested her head on his shoulder. “I wish I could help get you
un-fucked-up.”

“Me too.”

Wendie had been so hopeful
about the experimental PTSD treatment. She’d been supportive, a top-notch big
sister, but when you couldn’t be fixed, you couldn’t be fixed. End of story.

“You hungry? I could make you
something.” She lifted her head from his shoulder to look at him.

He rubbed his hand over his
stomach, which was empty, but the thought of putting food in there made him
slightly green. “Nah. I’m good.”

His sister’s eyes drilled into
his temple for a few silent moments as he turned the television on again. Not
even Dr. Sheldon Cooper’s antics could numb his senses tonight. Every time he
blinked, he pictured Hope pinned against the bar, that gutter trash right up in
her face. His hands had been on her. He’d breathed the same air as her. He’d
made plans to touch her, to take what was most definitely not his to take.

Adam let out a growl that had
Wendie angling her head at him. Jesus Christ. What was wrong with him?

Too many things to count.

“I’m going to work out.” He
slid his feet off the coffee table. Pulling himself to the edge of the couch
cushion, he set his hand on Wendie’s knee. “Thanks for coming by.”

“But get the hell out?” She
nudged him with her shoulder.

“I’m glad you speak my
language.” He elbowed her back.

“And you can always tell me
anything. You know that, right?”

He did. He totally did, but some
things a guy couldn’t say out loud. Some horrors that had been witnessed wouldn’t
be good to put into words. Some dark events made even the worst nightmares seem
like a stroll in the sunshine.

“I know, Wendie. Thanks.”
Giving her knee a squeeze, he stood and crossed the living room to the kitchen.
He downed a tall glass of water in one continuous gulp, wincing slightly as the
rim pressed against his split lip, and headed down the short hall to his
bedroom.

The beauty of owning a workshop
barn was that everything in his apartment above was right there. The living
room, kitchen, and dining room were one big open space with gorgeous hickory
floors Adam and Orion had put in themselves. A few quick steps down the hall
was his bedroom, a bathroom, and a big bonus room he used as a home gym. Below
that was his workshop where he housed all his lumberjacking equipment, plus the
woodworking essentials—table saw, miter saw, scroll saw, planer, jointer, drill
press, and lathe among his favorites. He could lose himself in the shop.

Woodworking therapy.

Probably the best treatment he
was going to get, but a man could only build so many things before he realized
he was avoiding dealing with his problems.