Moth to a Flame (11 page)
Authors: Ashley Antoinette
“Whoo!” he shouted in excitement. There was more cocaine in the safe than he had ever anticipated. After months of planning it was finally his time to come into his own. He opened the four duffel bags he had brought, and he and Rich emptied the safe.
“One hundred and twenty bricks,” he stated in disbelief. He was about to make the streets snow and couldn’t wait to put in work. He pulled out one kilo and placed it back in the safe, leaving the door wide open.
“What are you doing, fam? Take all that shit. What you putting one back for?” Rich asked.
“That one brick is going to take care of my main competition,” Mizan replied as he darted down the steps with the duffel bags in hand. He hit the panic button on the alarm before leaving, which sent a direct message to the police department. “When the police get here they’re gonna find that brick. It’s enough to send Benny Atkins away for the rest of his life, and the streets will be wide open for the taking.”
When Raven saw the police cars in front of her father’s house, she immediately thought the worst. The neighbors had come out to watch the scene. They stood around the Atkins’ property, trying to get a glimpse of what was going on.
“Oh my God ... Did Mommy and Morgan go to church this morning? she asked, fearing the worst. Her father ignored the question, but she could see his brow furrow in concern. They stepped out of the car and Benjamin rushed up the walkway only to be stopped by a plainclothes detective.
“Whoa, who are you? You can’t go in there, the detective said.
“I’m the owner of this house. What is going on? Are my wife and daughter inside? he asked. Raven stood in the background, terrified, as she shook her head, praying that nothing had gone wrong and that her family was safe.
The detective moved his hand to his pistol. “Sir, I’m going to need you to step back and put your hands up slowly.” He raised his gun and aimed it at Benjamin’s chest.
“Fuck is wrong with you? Answer my question! What is going on inside my house? Where is my wife? Justine!” he screamed as he pushed past the detective, fearing that something had happened to his wife and child.
“Daddy, wait!” Raven shouted.
Benjamin was stopped by two uniformed police officers. “Get your fucking hands off of me!” he yelled. “I own this house. I need to get inside.” He reached into his jacket pocket.
“He has a gun!” one of the officers shouted. Before Benjamin could protest, the officers opened fire.
“Daddy!” Raven screamed as she witnessed her father’s body go limp. He seemed to fall in slow motion in front of her face, and when his body hit the pavement, a sickening thud echoed from his head hitting the ground. A wallet fell out of his hand, revealing that he had only been reaching for identification to prove that he was the owner of the house. “Daddy!” Raven ran for her father, but was held back from getting too close. “He didn’t have a gun! What did you do?” she screamed in agony as her legs gave out under her and she collapsed in the detective’ s arms. She hit him furiously. “What did you do?” she cried.
Raven stared at the blood on her hands as she sat on the floor in the hospital. She was waiting by the morgue for her mother and sister to arrive. She hadn’t the heart to call her mother herself, so she’d allowed the hospital to do it. She heard her mother’s wails through the phone.
This is all my fault,
she thought. Her pale skin was flushed red from constant crying. She could not wrap her mind around the fact that her father was gone. She regretted their foolish fighting. Now she would never have a chance to say she was sorry, or to make things right. In the blink of an eye he had been taken from her. She was now a fatherless child, and the ache she felt in her soul was one she would live with for the rest of her life. She looked at her vibrating cell phone and ignored it. Mizan had been calling her all day, but she did not have the energy to speak to him. She was sure he had heard what had happened, but she was not trying to hear anything from anyone. Nobody could take away the emptiness she felt inside. No one would ever understand what she had lost.
This is all my fault,
she thought. Her pale skin was flushed red from constant crying. She could not wrap her mind around the fact that her father was gone. She regretted their foolish fighting. Now she would never have a chance to say she was sorry, or to make things right. In the blink of an eye he had been taken from her. She was now a fatherless child, and the ache she felt in her soul was one she would live with for the rest of her life. She looked at her vibrating cell phone and ignored it. Mizan had been calling her all day, but she did not have the energy to speak to him. She was sure he had heard what had happened, but she was not trying to hear anything from anyone. Nobody could take away the emptiness she felt inside. No one would ever understand what she had lost.
“Raven?”
She heard her mother’s voice and looked up. Justine came down the hall, holding Morgan’ s hand. Ethic stood by her side as he escorted them inside.
“Mommy?” Raven called as she stood up. She ran to her mother and hugged her tightly. “I’m so sorry, Mommy ... I’m sorry,” she whispered. She buried her face in Justine’s shoulders as they embraced each other Morgan. “They shot him right in front of my face. They killed him,” Raven sobbed.
Justine felt as if her heart had been ripped from her chest as she held her daughters. She had been with Benjamin since she was a young girl. He was the love of her life, and to have him taken away so suddenly felt like torture.
“Mrs. Atkins?” a woman in a white lab coat interrupted.
Justine looked up and nodded as she wiped her nose with a tissue. “Yes, I’m Mrs. Atkins, she confirmed.
She spoke with so much sorrow that she brought tears to the woman’s eyes. “I am so very sorry for your loss. Your daughter is still a minor so she could not legally identify the body. I hate to put you through this, but... .”
“I’ll identify him,” she replied. “I’d like to see what they did to him.”
The woman led Justine away, and Morgan clung to Raven.
“What happened to Daddy, Rae?” Morgan signed as she cried from uncertainty. She did not know exactly what was going on but she could feel the sadness in the air.
Raven was speechless. She was so caught up in her own grief that she was choking on it, unable to respond to her little sister’s question. Ethic had been standing back to allow them their intimate moments, but he could see that Raven was traumatized. He bent down to face Morgan. “Your daddy is with the angels. He is watching over you right now, so wipe your face. You don’ t want him to see you crying,” Ethic signed back.
Morgan wiped her tears and Raven turned her back to them because she could not stop herself from breaking down. It was so unfair. She felt like seventeen years was not enough time with her father. Ethic came up behind her and put his hand on her back. She turned into him and cried on his shoulder.
“I was fighting with him ... For months I haven’t talked to him,” she said.
“Don’t think about that. None of that matters now. He knew you loved him,” Ethic assured her.
“I don’t know how I let this happen,” Raven said as she shook her head. Something inside of her was telling her that Mizan’s setup was the reason why the police had gotten involved. “How did this happen?”
“I don’t know, ma ... but I’m gon’ find out,” he stated.
Justine emerged from the coroner’s office. Distress was written all over her face as she reached for Morgan. “I can’t believe he’s gone,” she said. “I just need to go home ... Raven, will you stay with us tonight? I need both of my girls with me.”
Raven desperately wanted to be near her family, but she knew that Mizan wouldn’t want her staying the night away from home. “I can’t, ma. I can’t go back there right now. I can’t get the image of Daddy laying on the grass out of my head,” she replied.
Justine touched Raven’s cheek gently and gave her a half smile. “I understand, baby. Tomorrow then?” she asked.
Raven nodded in agreement. “Tomorrow, I promise.”
“I would really love for you to come home. We are all we have left. We have to stick together, Justine said solemnly. She turned to Ethic. “Thank you for rushing here to be with us, Ethic. You were like the son Benjamin never had, and he trusted you.”
“Do you need anything?” Ethic asked.
Justine looked to the floor as her bottom lip quivered. “What I need you can’t give me, Ethic. No one can.” She walked away, holding Morgan’s hand.
Ethic turned to Raven. “How did you get here?”
“I rode in the ambulance with my daddy.”
“Let me take you home,” he said. He removed his Sean John hoodie and wrapped it around her shoulders, then led her outside to his car. Raven’s nerves were shot, and she breathed deeply, trying to calm down. She desperately needed a line of coke to take the edge off. She needed it to take her away. She sniffled loudly as her nose ran, and she became antsy. Ethic noticed her erratic behavior, but he dismissed it. He wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, and assumed that she was grieving over what had happened. They did not speak as he took her back to Mizan’s. Her world had been turned upside down and she was sure that it was her fault. Something had gone wrong.
Mizan told me that this would be easy.... that nobody would get hurt,
she thought.
Mizan told me that this would be easy.... that nobody would get hurt,
she thought.
Ethic could see that Raven was deeply affected by Benjamin’s death. Everyone knew that she was the apple of her father’s eye, and he was sure that this would affect her more than anyone else. “I’m sorry, Raven,” Ethic said. The way he spoke her name reminded her of her father, and she put her face in her hands and sobbed quietly. Ethic rubbed her back gently with one hand as he steered the car with the other. “Let it out, ma. You don’t got to play tough. Let it out.”
As soon as Ethic pulled in front of her house, Mizan stepped out onto the porch to make his presence known. Ethic turned Raven’s face toward him, his touch like electricity running up and down her spine. “You sure you don’t want to stay with your moms tonight?” he asked. “You don’t have to play this game anymore. You can go back home.”
“Raven!” Mizan called, causing her to jump in her seat.
“I’ve got to go, Ethic,” she said nervously, her wide eyes filled with emotion. She opened the door and Ethic grabbed her hand gently.
“Just because your father is gon’doesn’t mean you don’t still have an army of niggas behind you. All you got to do is say the word. I don’t like your nigga. The only reason he’s still breathing is because of you,” Ethic whispered.
“Rae!” Mizan’s voice was like the bark of a pit bull.
Raven pulled back her hand. “I’m sorry, I got to go,” she said again. She walked up to the house, never looking back as she went inside. Mizan put both of his hands up as if to tell Ethic that he was ready to pop off anytime.
Ethic bit his inner cheek as he tried to control his temper. He had never been the type to start a fight, but if Mizan wanted to push him to the edge, he would have no problem finishing one. He got his money low key. He avoided the flash and the spotlight so that he could keep a low profile and avoid unwanted attention from the police. Mizan, however, was pulling his card and provoking him to start a beef. Ethic knew that Mizan was intimidated by him. The look in Raven’s eyes when she looked at Ethic infuriated Mizan, which is why he was itching to take him off the map.
I don’t want your bitch,
Ethic thought as he backed out of the driveway. Ethic did not have to prove his gangster. He had only been in Flint for a few months and his name already rang bells in the street. As a man of few words, he didn’t speak unless he had something important to say. At first, the hustlers in Flint had taken his passive personality as a weakness, but after he proved that he was about his gunplay, he commanded the respect of his peers. Ethic hoped that he didn’t have to make an example out of Mizan, because once Ethic pressed “go” on his murder game, there would be no stopping him.
I don’t want your bitch,
Ethic thought as he backed out of the driveway. Ethic did not have to prove his gangster. He had only been in Flint for a few months and his name already rang bells in the street. As a man of few words, he didn’t speak unless he had something important to say. At first, the hustlers in Flint had taken his passive personality as a weakness, but after he proved that he was about his gunplay, he commanded the respect of his peers. Ethic hoped that he didn’t have to make an example out of Mizan, because once Ethic pressed “go” on his murder game, there would be no stopping him.
Mizan stepped back into the house and approached Raven. Before she could say a word he wrapped one hand around her throat. He pushed her head against the wall so hard that the drywall dented behind her. “Fuck is wrong with you? I’ve been calling your phone all fucking day. You were too busy out fucking with that nigga to answer my calls, bitch,” he said harshly as he chastised her with a finger in her face. Raven grabbed at his hand for release. She couldn’t breathe and her eyes bulged from the lack of oxygen. “This the second time that mu’fucka done came to my house on your behalf. You fucking him?” Mizan yelled through clenched teeth as he pounded her head against the wall repeatedly.
She fell to her knees when he released, her and grabbed the back of her head as an instant headache formed in of her skull. She sobbed as she braced herself on the floor while nursing her injured neck. She stared at him in contempt.
“I’m not fucking him! He works for my father! He’s dead, Mizan! I’ve been at the hospital all day. Ethic just brought me home!” she yelled. “You told me nothing would go wrong!”
Mizan’s rage melted away as he processed what she had just said. “Nothing was supposed to go wrong,” he said defensively. “What happened?”
“When we showed up there were police everywhere! Daddy thought something bad had happened to my mom. He was just trying to get inside to see. They shot him, Mizan! He’s gone.” She curled up on the floor, lying on her side, her back facing Mizan. The immeasurable pain that plagued her heart was almost too much to handle. It was torture.
Mizan smiled wickedly. He hadn’t intended for Benjamin to die, but now that it had happened, the reality of his situation was bittersweet. Bitter for Raven, but oh-so-sweet for him. Now he could take over the streets without fear of Benjamin’s retribution. He looked at Raven on the floor and lay down beside her. He wrapped his arms around her.
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