Mr. Darcy's Proposal (4 page)

“Why do I always end up telling you everything?”

“Confession is good for the soul, Cousin. You will feel better for it.”

“I am not sure about that, but at least you may stop tormenting me.”

Darcy swirled the brandy around his glass, warming it with his hand, and then took another large swallow before he began.

“I am in love with her,” said Darcy quietly.

“In love with whom?”

“You know very well whom—Miss Elizabeth Bennet!”

“Ah! I suspected as much. I have seen you in many moods—angry, frustrated, even happy—but I have never seen you in love. Tell me all about it.”

“I am sure I told you how we happened to meet. I was in Hertfordshire visiting Bingley last fall.”

“I seem to recall you did not have much good to say about your visit to the country. It was a little too rustic for your cultured taste.”

“Yes, I found most of it quite tiresome. Every social situation was more tedious than the last. You know how difficult I find talking to strangers. I despise being the focus of attention and the object of gossip. I could just feel the target on my back as word of my situation made its way around. All those hopeful mothers pushing their daughters my way!”

“Knowing you, you must have been miserable.”

“Bingley gets along with everyone, and he found it all quite delightful, especially a certain young lady—the one I mentioned to you before.”

“You said you managed to save him from making a huge mistake with a local fortune-hunter.”

Darcy winced. “There is more to that story than you know. The woman Bingley was infatuated with was Miss Elizabeth’s sister, Miss Jane Bennet.”

“Oh, no,” said Fitzwilliam, slipping down in his chair. “I think I may have made a terrible
faux pas
, Darcy.”

“Ah, so that is how she learned of my involvement.”

“My sincerest apologies. I had no idea that story was in any way connected with Miss Elizabeth. I hope I did not make things too difficult for you.”

“Oh, no,” Darcy said sarcastically. “All it did was turn a bad situation into a near disaster, but that seems to be the course of my relationship with her almost from the very first evening we met.”

“The famous Darcy charm! Let me guess—you managed to offend her somehow. You are so good at that.”

Darcy shot him one of his disapproving looks. “Yes, and in the worst way. I cringe to even think about it. It is ironic considering how I feel about her now. Bingley was insisting I dance at the local assembly, but I was in no mood to make any effort at civility. He kept after me to dance, and when he suggested I ask Miss Elizabeth, I put him off by pronouncing her something like “tolerable but not handsome enough to tempt me”, and of course, she overheard every word.”

Fitzwilliam grimaced and rolled his eyes. “That will teach you to keep opinions like that to yourself.”

“As I said, Bingley was quite taken with Miss Bennet. When his sisters, Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst, invited Miss Bennet for dinner one evening, she fell ill and had to stay several days to recover. Bingley was delighted, of course. Miss Elizabeth came to Netherfield to take care of her sister and ended up staying for several days, too. While she was there, I began to admire her, but I was cautious and did not want to show her too much attention. Despite my efforts, Miss Bingley, who has been following me around for several years now in hopes I would turn my attentions to her, managed to sniff out something of my interest in Miss Elizabeth. She was quite vocal in her criticisms of Elizabeth and her whole family. It was even worse after I admitted in a weak moment that I thought that the young lady in question had very fine eyes.”

Fitzwilliam threw his head back and laughed. “Oh, Darcy, this gets better and better. You were quite cruel to have kept this little entertainment to yourself all this time. You must have known how very amusing I would find it.”

“I am glad you see humor in it. I do not find it funny in the least. After being around her only a few times, I began to feel myself in danger of forming an attachment, and my good sense fought against it.”

“Why was that a problem? In your position, you could have any woman you wanted. Miss Elizabeth is a lovely, accomplished young woman. Her father is a gentleman. Did you think she was not good enough for you, you old snob?” he teased.

“Fitzwilliam, Miss Elizabeth and her sister are both delightful, well-mannered young ladies. The rest of their family is altogether another story. It is true that her father is a gentleman, but their situation is frankly so far beneath my own that it made it almost impossible for me to consider her seriously. Their mother is so brash that she had Bingley and Miss Bennet practically engaged before we had spent more than a half dozen evenings in their company. Everyone in the neighborhood was talking of it.”

“What did it matter to you, if Bingley loved her?”

“I have seen Bingley fall in and out of love a dozen times, but this time I began to wonder if he was not in real danger. I watched them together, and she did not look as if she loved him, so I tried to prevent him from making a big mistake. If they really loved each other, I suppose I could have overlooked her family’s ill manners. Oh, yes, I forgot to mention there are three younger sisters who all behaved in very unladylike ways at several parties we attended. It was embarrassing to see. I finally persuaded Bingley that Miss Bennet was indifferent to him, that she was just after his fortune and he would be miserable married to her. I admit to having some help from Bingley’s sisters in this. Charles is a very good man, but he is prone to being easily influenced. I may have taken advantage of that. He was not secure enough of Miss Bennet’s affections so he took my advice and did not return to Netherfield. I thought I had saved him from an imprudent marriage. Also, I was spared from having to see Miss Elizabeth again.”

“But you could not forget her?”

“I am embarrassed to admit I even dreamed about her for months after that.”

“Not really a surprise. She is charming enough to induce any man to dream a bit.”

“Behave yourself,” Darcy said in mock anger. “She is spoken for.”

Fitzwilliam flashed a wicked grin. “So when we arrived at Aunt Catherine’s for our annual Easter visit, there she was.”

“Yes, and it gets even more complicated. Mr. Collins, that obsequious little parson Aunt Catherine sponsors, is the Bennet’s cousin. He was visiting Hertfordshire when I was there and had the temerity to come up and speak to me with no introduction. Can you imagine that?”

“He is an unpleasant fellow,” Fitzwilliam agreed.

“Unfortunately, the Bennet’s home, Longbourn, is entailed to Collins upon Mr. Bennet’s death as there are no sons—just the five girls.”

“I begin to see where this is going.”

“Apparently, Collins was in Hertfordshire at our aunt’s instruction to find a wife presumably from among his cousins. I learned recently that he proposed to Miss Elizabeth, but she had the good sense to turn him down. He married her friend, instead. That is how Miss Elizabeth came to be visiting Kent.”

“I frequently caught you looking at her when she was at Rosings. At first, I just thought that our dear aunt was boring you more than usual, and you were entertaining yourself by watching a beautiful lady. After it went on for a while, I suspected you had feelings for her, but I never dreamed it was this serious. What are you planning to do now?”

“You remember the evening before we left, she stayed back at the parsonage claiming a headache—the one brought on by learning about Bingley and her sister from you!”

Fitzwilliam grimaced. “I seem to recall you disappeared for a while.”

“I went to call on her to beg her to end my misery and marry me. When I got there, she had just received the letter about her father’s illness. Understandably, she was quite distressed. In that moment of weakness, she told me everything.”

“As usual, your timing is perfect!” exclaimed Fitzwilliam with a laugh.

“Once I knew she needed help, I offered my carriage. I admit at the time I was thinking that if I assisted her, she might be even more inclined to look favorably on my proposal.”

“And she did allow you to help her. What is the problem? All you have to do now is follow her to Hertfordshire after an appropriate period of time and ask for her hand. No woman in her right mind would turn you down.”

“There is one who most definitely would. In spite of my attempt at chivalry, Miss Elizabeth was more than a little angry with me—having it fresh in her mind about the role I had in ruining her sister’s life. She let me know in no uncertain terms what she thinks of me. In addition to despising me for hurting her sister, she also thinks I am selfish, conceited, and disdainful of others—to name just a few of my many faults she enumerated that evening.”

“A small complication, I am sure.”

Darcy put his head in his hands. “I know I should be practical and let her go, but I find I cannot give her up that easily. She is not like any other woman I have ever met. She has never tried to gain my attention nor has she ever been impressed with my fortune or status. No, I believe the only course open to me is to prove to her somehow that I am a better man than she has taken me for. It will not be an easy task, but I believe she is a woman worthy of being pleased.”

“So you are determined to mend your ways in hopes she will change her mind about you. That should prove interesting! How do you plan to accomplish this magical trick?”

Darcy sighed and leaning back in his chair, stretched his long legs out in front of him. “Her family is in a very difficult position. When her father dies and Collins inherits, he will most certainly want them out of the house as quickly as possible so he can take over. I know through other sources that the family will have a very limited income, so I am sure she must be concerned about how they will manage.”

“I am surprised at you. You have always despised anyone you thought was just after your fortune. Now you are hoping she will marry you because of it?”

“I am ashamed to say it is true. I plan to entice her into accepting me by offering her mother and sisters my protection. Once we are married, I will somehow find a way to win her love. I think, in spite of what she says, there is an attraction there on her part, too. I had a hint of it when we were talking that evening at the parsonage and again when we stopped at the inn. I only hope I am right.”

“I think you have lost your mind, Darcy.”

He looked at his cousin and shook his head. “No, it is my heart that is lost.”

“Very well. Get on your horse and ride for Hertfordshire tomorrow. If this is what you truly want, you best go after it whole-heartedly or else you will wonder later why you did not try hard enough.”

“That is exactly my plan, but first, I have a call to make in the morning to correct the injury I have done my friend, Bingley. I know I am risking his friendship, but I cannot in good conscience leave this as it is. He has a right to know that Miss Bennet’s feelings for him were real.”

The cousins talked until nearly midnight and then retired. Darcy’s dreams that night were filled with Elizabeth. He saw her at Pemberley walking the grounds with him, sitting across the dining room table, playing at the pianoforte in the music room. In each of his dreams, her eyes were bright with love as she looked at him.

Five

When Elizabeth finally arrived at Longbourn, she and Jane embraced giving each other comfort.

“I am so glad you have come home.” As they walked into the house, Jane seemed to read the unspoken question on her sister’s face. “Oh, Lizzy, I am so sorry to have to tell you this. The doctor says his heart has been so weakened that while he may live for a few weeks or possibly months, he will certainly never recover.”

Elizabeth’s heart sank. This could not be happening. How could she go on without her beloved father? What would become of their family? Elizabeth noticed how exhausted Jane looked and was glad she was now home to share the burden.

“Jane, you must be very tired from all you have had to bear by yourself, but I am here now, and we will manage together somehow.”

“You cannot imagine my relief to have you home.”

“I am almost afraid to ask about our mother.”

“I think everyone from here to Meryton has heard her weeping. She is so irrational that she is no better than a patient herself,” said Jane.

“Let me take over now so you can rest. I suspect you have barely slept these past few days.”

“Do not worry about me, Lizzy. Let me take you to see Papa. Mostly, he sleeps but occasionally he wakes and has been able to speak to us a little. He has asked for you several times.”

Together, Elizabeth and Jane went up to their father’s bedchamber where they found him asleep. Going immediately to his side, Elizabeth knelt down and took his hand in hers.

“Papa, I am here. Your Lizzy is home. Everything will be fine now.” She laid her cheek against his hand, and tears formed in spite of her resolution to remain calm. Pulling a handkerchief from her pocket, she patted her eyes dry. As she was refolding it, she realized it was one of Mr. Darcy’s, embroidered with his initials, FD, and a simple scroll-like design. She sighed and tucked it back into her pocket.