Mr. Sandman (20 page)

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Authors: Robert T. Jeschonek

BOOK: Mr. Sandman
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Page 12 (6
panels)

 

Page 12 panel 1

 

Dream Lord and Lullaby glide to a landing on the tip of the drawbridge.

 

Lullaby: This might be
Snow White's
pad, or
Sleeping Beauty's
--but this is
not
that Bogeyman's place! Uh-
uh
!

 

Dream Lord: The wolf in sheep's clothing, Stacy. Believe me, this is
it
.

 

 

 

Page 12 panel 2

 

Dream Lord (pointing to a big neon sign over the huge gateway to the castle): See? The Dream Lord knows
all
!

 

The neon sign reads, in flashing letters:
Bogeyman Resorts International and Elks Lodge Welcome The Dream Lord & Co.

 

Lullaby: Wow! He really spared no expense to disguise this place, did he? That must mean he's
real
scared of us.

 

 

 

Page 12 panel 3

 

Dream Lord walks briskly across the drawbridge, through the gate, and into the glittering castle hallway beyond. He gestures for Lullaby to follow him in, and she does.

 

Dream Lord: Let's go. We're off to meet the Wizard.

 

Lullaby: I guess that makes
you
the
munchkin
and
me
the
lion
, huh?

 

 

 

Page 12 panel 4

 

At the end of the entrance hallway, a butler stops the pair, holding out his hands.

 

Butler: Take your wrap, sir? Madam?

 

Dream Lord: No, thanks. We prefer to remain wrapped.

 

Lullaby: Yeah, we like wrapping--like the way we're gonna
wrap up
your boss!

 

 

 

Page 12 panel 5

 

Butler: Very good, then. Could I see your invitations, please?

 

Dream Lord brushes past the Butler and into the castle and Lullaby follows, poking a finger at the Butler's chest.

 

Lullaby: Why don't you go starch your eyelashes?
We
are
V.I.P.'
s
, junior! Our
faces
are
our
invitations!

 

Dream Lord: Looks like we're just in time, Stacy...

 

 

 

Page 12 panel 6

 

Large panel showing the room that the Dream Lord and Lullaby have entered--a huge, elegant ballroom, complete with chandeliers, statuary, a fountain at the center of the room, and a winding marble staircase at the far end. The room is filled with people, dressed in colorful costumes like those worn in the 1600's by British and French nobility. It is a huge masquerade ball, with lots of powdered wigs and elaborate jewelry and shiny silk masks that are held before the guests' faces by rods. In a corner of the room, a man in a mask plays a harpsichord. Butlers circulate through the crowd, carrying trays of food. A long table sits along one wall, crammed with foods and desserts of all kinds.

 

Dream Lord: ...the party just started.

 

Voice (off-panel): Oh-ho! Honored guests, if I may direct your attention to the vestibule, won't you just
look
who we have here!

 

 

 

 

Page 13 (7
panels)

 

Page 13 panel 1

 

Bogeyman stands on a raised dais at one end of the ballroom. He is overjoyed, eager for his sport with the Dream Lord, and he stands with his arms spread wide in welcome; he is playing the role of host to the tee. He is dressed in a fancy black costume out of the 1700s, complete with a long black cape, black knickers over white stockings, a black shirt with lots of ruffles at the sleeves and neck, a black mask, and a black tri-cornered hat.

 

Bogeyman: What a splendid, unmitigated
surprise
! What a perfect
coup
for our

felicitous gathering! With a wistful tear at my eye, may I present to you... reverently...these most recent and auspicious of visitors...

 

 

 

Page 13 panel 2

 

Bogeyman (off-panel): ...the
Little Rascals
! Come on now, let's make some

noise for our celebrities!

 

A huge round of applause thunders through the ballroom as everyone, even the waiters, turns and claps. There are also many cheers and shouts, such as
Bravo!,
Hip-hip-hoorah!
, and
Marvelous!
Dream Lord and Lullaby stand at the entrance to the room, watching the applauding crowd, both remaining wary and determined.

 

Lullaby: The Little Rascals? Who's been dustin'
his
muffins?

 

Dream Lord: He's a madman. He's a walking, talking
virus
--concealing his sickness with all this idiotic clowning. This is the same monster who made that
hell
outside...the same demonic
bastard
.

 

 

 

Page 13 panel 3

 

Bogeyman (raising his hand toward the crowd):
Ahem
. Will you restrain your applause for a moment, my ostentatious compatriots? Much obliged.

 

The loud clapping dies in mid-panel.

 

 

 

Page 13 panel 4

 

Closeup of Bogeyman bellowing at the top of his lungs at Dream Lord and Lullaby.

 

Bogeyman:
I heard that, A
lfalfa!

 

 

 

Page 13 panel 5

 

Bogeyman (suddenly calm, restrained, smiling pleasantly): And I must say, I am flattered beyond words. You wily courtier! I should have expected such magnanimous panegyrics from such a flamboyant performer as yourself! Compliments like
that
shall
certainly
earn you points in
this
household!

 

 

 

Page 13 panel 6

 

Bogeyman: Ladies and lords, once again--the Little Rascals!

 

Again, the room erupts with loud applause and a chorus of cheers and Bravos.

 

Lullaby: Okay. I've figured it out--this guy is a big-time
loon
. He's definitely a few bubbles off plumb.

 

Dream Lord: This is only the beginning, Stacy. Be ready for anything.

 

 

 

Page 13 panel 7

 

Bogeyman (stepping down from the dais to walk through the crowd toward the Dream Lord): Ha ha! I'm
so
thrilled that you could attend our soiree, you big stars! As they say, variety is the spice of life, and among the nobility--these inbred ingrates--there is so
little
variation. Film stars contribute just the right touch, don't you think? A dash of notoriety, a bit of the freakish.

 

 

 

 

Page 14 (8
panels)

 

Page 14 panel 1

 

Bogeyman (walking up some short steps to stand by Dream Lord and Lullaby at the entranceway): Tell me, freaks, would you consent to privilege this assembly with some of your wonderful routines? You know--a madcap chase across the dance floor--a spunky caper through the punch bowl--or perhaps a few pies in the face? Oh, we've
plenty
of pies!

 

Man in crowd: Yes,
please
perform for us! We
adore
your films so
much
!

 

Woman: Won't you do a skit or two, Rascals?

 

Man: We would
die
for a pie in the face!

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 2

 

Lullaby: How about a
fist
in the face, ugly?

 

Bogeyman (putting an arm around the Dream Lord's shoulder): You precocious little gangsters have acquired quite a
following
among the upper crust, as you can see. Your goofy mischief is considered the finest
art
, right alongside the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel and the simple tunes of Chopin. Why not grace us with a scene? Perhaps little black Buckwheat could shave your head and paint you up with chicken pox.

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 3

 

Lullaby: Hey! I resent that, you crud!

 

Dream Lord (tensely removing Bogeyman's arm from his shoulder): Sorry, no scenes. We're not here to amuse you.

 

Bogeyman: No? Then why come at all? For that matter, why
exist
?

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 4

 

Dream Lord: We came here to stop you.

 

Bogeyman: Oh, I see! Then you
are
here to amuse! What a ridiculous premise!

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 5

 

Dream Lord (angry, trying to force Bogeyman into a confrontation, to end the silly routine):
Listen
to me, you son of a bitch! You have violated thousands of minds, and I will not...

 

Bogeyman (cutting him off and turning to the crowd): 'Scuse me, noble merrymakers! There will be no escapades from the Rascals...not
yet
, anyway...but this festival shall dauntlessly
continue
! I implore you all to eat voraciously, quaff profusely, and dance like wild pagans!

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 6

 

Bogeyman (turning back to the Dream Lord): And as for
you
, silly Kubla, why not make yourself at home amidst the elegance? It is all
quite
the opulent manse...actually, reminiscent of
your
old digs. Ask and you shall receive! You can have absolutely
anything
you desire!

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 7

 

Dream Lord: All right. I want you dead.

 

Bogeyman: Sorry, we're fresh out of that. How about some Chateaubriand?

 

 

 

Page 14 panel 8

 

Dream Lord: I'd rather have some answers.

 

Bogeyman: Ah-ha! There, you're in luck! We just rounded some up this morning, roaming the royal preserve. How about "nine," "Ulysses," and "maranatha?" There are
many
more where
those
came from!

 

 

 

 

Page 15 (8
panels)

 

Page 15 panel 1

 

Dream Lord: No. I want
the
answers. I want to hear what you
know
about me--the truth you keep teasing me with. I'm sick of your coy crap.

 

Bogeyman: Well, I suppose it
could
be arranged...but it will hurt you a
great
deal. I do believe the knowledge may even induce heart failure.

 

 

 

Page 15 panel 2

 

Dream Lord (gritting his teeth, very uptight): I'm
already
hurt...remember? As for my heart, you already put a sword through it.

 

Bogeyman: Oh, did
I
do that? How careless of me!

 

 

 

Page 15 panel 3

 

Dream Lord: It can't get much worse.

 

Bogeyman: Oh, I beg to differ with
that
brilliant assessment. It
can
.
Much
, much worse. But if
you
don't mind some more unbearable agony...

 

 

 

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