Music for My Soul (18 page)

“Will this Lord Eversleigh doubt me?”

Gwenith smiled tiredly. “Nay, Maddie. Evan’s the spittin’ image of his other three sons, and they all take after their daddy. He’ll believe you. Just tell him Gwenith sent you. And Maddie?” Gwenith grinned through her pain, a sad, sweet smile of dreams lost. “Tell him I never stopped loving him. My thoughts were with him to the last.”

With that, she was gone.

Madeleine took Gwenith’s hand and kissed it tenderly as tears streamed down her cheeks. She held it close till the warmth ebbed, and then she gently placed it next to Gwenith’s heart. Her own heart now shattered into a thousand pieces, and she knew a piece of her had died with Gwenith. But she would do as her friend asked.

“I promise you, Gwenith, I will take Evan to his father. If he’ll not have him, then I will care for him.”

Madeleine rose and left the tent. Several had gathered outside in the growing gloom. She turned to Osbert. “Tell Farley that Gwenith has passed on. We need to seek permission from Lord Montayne to find a spot for her burial. And find Father Kelvin, too. Gwenith must have last rites.”

Elspeth stepped forward and put an arm around Madeleine. “I’ll get Hannah and Ruth. We’ll help prepare Gwenith.”

Madeleine shook her head. “No, I must.”

Elspeth squeezed her arm. “I insist. Ye’re worn to the bone. Find Evan and care for him now. Take him to our tent. Ye’ll both sleep there tonight.”

The next few days passed in a blur. Father Kelvin presided over the funeral mass and Gwenith’s internment. The faire continued, but Farley excused Madeleine from performing until after the burial. Then Edgar came bearing interesting news.

“Just think, Madeleine. Lord Montayne has asked the mummers to stay on for a week after the faire ends. ‘Tis a house party he’s having, and he’d like us to entertain his guests. ‘Twill be extra money in all our pockets!”

Madeleine was still numb from Gwenith’s death and hardly took in Edgar’s news. Nothing seemed of interest to her anymore.

Then she realized Edgar had said extra money. This would enable her to complete her pledge to Gwenith and see Evan to his father in Sussex. From the channel’s coast, she could sail directly to France. It would be time to forget her sorrows and move on.

“What kind of money, Edgar?”

“Well, Farley said it’d all be a bonus we’d be getting, with his lordship paying a goodly amount for us to stay on awhile.”

“That’s good news, indeed, Edgar,” she said.

Farley found her soon afterward. “I hear that Edgar already let ye in on our good news.” He was beaming. “To be asked to stay for a house party is a great thing, Madeleine. But,” he added, “Lord Montayne especially asked for ye to narrate our plays. He said York has a pleasant voice and all, but he thought his guests would be amused by a woman acting as troubadour. Are ye up to it, Madeleine?”

Heart heavy, Madeleine knew she could not let Farley and the rest of the mummers down. She owed them too much. The extra money she would help them earn might ease her conscience somewhat when the time came to leave them behind.

“Of course I will do it, Farley.”

Farley’s face lit up with a warm smile, and he wrapped her in a bear hug. “That’s me girl,” he cried. “A mummer puts one foot in front of the other, no matter what the circumstances be.”

The next day the faire ended. The peddlers moved on with their wares. The crowds dispersed to return to life as they knew it. The troupe’s tents remained at the far edge of the meadow, though, since the mummers had been asked to stay on. They rehearsed several new plays for Lord Montayne’s guests, who began arriving shortly after the faire’s end.

One afternoon, Lissa came to play with Evan and began talking excitedly about the changes. “Madeleine, you should see all the people. No one ever visits us, except Ashby. Aga says he’s not a visitor, he’s just a silly man.”

Madeleine laughed. “I couldn’t agree with you more, Lissa. Every time I’ve spoken with Sir Ashby he’s been silly, indeed.”

“But he likes Luke,” Lissa pointed out, watching her tabby chase the string of yarn Evan trailed behind him.

“Then Sir Ashby must be a nice man, too.”

“I miss you coming to the castle, Madeleine,” Lissa pouted. “Papa said you’re busy.”

Madeleine felt her eyes fill. “Yes, Lissa, I was caring for—”

“ —Evan’s mama.”

“Yes, Gwenith.” Madeleine’s heart was heavy as she said the name. “She was my very good friend, and I miss her a great deal.”

Lissa frowned. “Are you Evan’s new mama?”

Madeleine hesitated. “That’s a difficult question, Lissa. I am caring for Evan now.”

“Lissa! Come play with Luke and me,” Evan called.

The girl left Madeleine’s side and ran toward the boy and her kitten.

“Who will be responsible for Evan when the troupe disbands for the winter?”

Madeleine turned and saw Garrett standing before her. The sun burnished his dark hair till it gleamed. His eyes glowed at her from his tanned face. Her heart lurched at the sight of him.

Calming her flutters, she quietly answered, “Gwenith asked me to take him to his father. I will be doing this after your house party has ended and the troupe moves on.”

“So you’ll leave the mummers?”

She nodded. “For a time. It’s important I get Evan to his father.” She watched the two children playing with the kitten, their squeals of delight bringing her momentary happiness. “He’s never met him, you see. ‘Tis an unusual circumstance.”

“Will the father accept him?” Garrett asked. “I assume he’s a bastard?”

Madeleine shrugged. “Such an ugly word for so sweet a child.” She met Garrett’s gaze. “Gwenith seemed sure that his father would do right by him.”

“How will the boy feel, being left in the care of strangers?”

“You are interested in the feelings of a mummer’s bastard, my lord?”

“I simply wondered how he’d feel being apart from you, Madeleine. I know how lonely I’ve been without you.” His voice held great tenderness as he took her hand. “You’re all he’s got now.”

Madeleine tugged at her hand, but Garrett refused to let go. “I must honor Gwenith’s final wish, my lord. Evan should be with his father.” She tugged harder, and he held on even more tightly. “Please give me my hand, my lord. I’m rather attached to it.”

“So am I,” he replied. He lifted it to his lips and grazed her knuckles before relaxing his hold. She jerked away from him as if he’d scalded her, and he laughed.

“I have missed you, Madeleine.”

“And I have missed you not at all, my lord.”

“Ever the little liar. And whose wife are you today?”

Madeleine caught her breath in a moment of panic. Then she relaxed, catching the teasing light in his eyes. “I have been many a man’s wife since I was yours, my lord. I think today I’ll be Edgar’s.”

“And make poor Edgar’s wife in heaven jealous?”

It amazed her how he remembered such small details. “I’m sure if I make Edgar deliriously happy, he’ll forget all about his dead wife,” she said flippantly.

Garrett grew suddenly serious. “You will be coming to the castle tonight, Madeleine?”

“Yes, my lord,” she assured him. “We have been hard at work on several new dramas for your guests.”

“Good,” he said and turned to go. “I will see you tonight then, Madeleine.”

“Yes, my lord. The entire troupe will be ready to do your bidding. Your guests shall not be disappointed.”

The castle was aflutter with activity after having gone so long with no guests to speak of. Annie, Lissa’s servant, confided in Madeleine how surprised they had been when Garrett announced the upcoming house party.

“Ye coulda knocked me down wi’a feather, Madeleine. I can’t right remember guests for ever so long at Stanbury. Not since the mistress done up and left.”

“Are there many who’ve come?” Madeleine wondered.

“Yes, a good twenty or more. Stanbury’s large enough for them, that’s fer sure, and ‘tis right for the master to start entertaining again. Lady Edith has walked around wi’ a smile on her face for a week.”

Madeleine thought of the house parties she’d given as the wife of one of the leading champagne merchants in Reims. Of course, they’d all been Henri’s friends and business associates. She’d acted merely as hostess at these affairs. But she had enjoyed them for as long as they lasted. They broke up the dull routine of her sheltered life, and she also had the opportunity to play and sing for those gathered.

Henri had showed a mix of pride in her accomplishments and yet had rebuffed her in private for not maintaining the high standards of his home. She knew, too, that once the guests made their way back to their own homes that Henri would find some fault so great with her that he would mete out the appropriate “punishment.” It had become standard behavior in their chateau.

Thankful to be away from that life now, Madeleine enjoyed her simple life as a mummer. They’d perform every night for the next seven nights at Stanbury. The audience was an eclectic group. Some were wealthy landowners who finagled an invitation once they heard those were being issued. Others were past friends of the Montayne family, and still others were business associates of Garrett’s from London.

Madeleine overheard Edith lamenting that her dearest childhood friend, Lady Ancil, was too ill to attend, and did fifty “Our Fathers” for that bit of good luck. She’d run away from Henri whilst they were guests of the Ancils, and the woman would have recognized her on the spot.

The troupe waited each night till the evening meal had been served before they came out. Madeleine usually sang a few songs before the night’s play began. Sometimes she sang a duet with York, which turned out to be quite successful.

Farley mentioned they’d have to try that more often once they left Stanbury.

Madeleine took comfort in that she’d be gone from Stanbury soon. She hated staying in one place so long for fear Henri would discover her whereabouts. She’d even had a few nightmares of Henri finding her. No, her time with the troupe had run its course, and she knew she must meet her obligation to Evan and then return to France.

She’d not informed Farley of her thoughts on leaving. She would simply tell him that she was taking Evan to his father and would return as soon as she could manage. He didn’t need to know about her plans to cross the channel for France. She knew she owed him more, but her fear outweighed any loyalty.

Every evening Madeleine told a story after the play ended. Ashby called for one that first night, and it became a ritual for Garrett’s guests. They seemed most enthralled with the tales from the
Arabian Nights
. They also enjoyed the legends surrounding King Arthur. Her mother had told her these stories every night for years. Madeleine had dreamt of someday finding her own Arthur and creating a world of beauty and goodness not unlike Camelot.

Madeleine was surprised when several guests gave her gold coins for her efforts.

“Look not so startled, Madeleine,” Ashby said as he pressed a coin into her palm. “You are quite good and it makes them feel better to reward you in this manner.”

“Thank you, my lord,” she murmured.

“Ashby, Madeleine. After all, we are old friends.” He winked at her and went on.

Madeleine found herself very pleased with the additional funds. They would make her trip go much more easily. She would have more than enough to pay for her passage to France. This way she could give the jewels she’d saved to the Mother Superior of the convent she joined, thus guaranteeing her keep for the rest of her natural life.

The group had only one more day at Stanbury before they loaded their belongings and headed further west. Madeleine promised, after Lissa’s insistent pleadings, that she and Evan would spend the day with the young girl. Annie saw to the packing of a picnic lunch for them, and so they set off to explore, Luke tagging along.

The threesome followed a stream into the forest that surrounded Stanbury. They stopped at a shady spot and laid their meal out. Cook had provided hunks of bread and cheese, cold chicken, and sweetmeats. They enjoyed their feast then lay on the blanket playing with Luke.

The heavily wooded forest blocked out much of the sunlight, and Madeleine did not realize that the sky had become dark or that rain was on its way until a sudden thunderclap startled them.

“Quickly, children, let’s pack up and head back to the castle. I fear we’re about to get caught in a downpour.”

Evan and Lissa gathered up the leftovers and placed them in the basket.

“Let’s put Luke in the basket, too,” Madeleine told them. “He’ll never be able to keep up with us. Besides, he’s acting a bit skittish because of the thunder.”

Just as Evan reached for the kitten, a loud thunderbolt rang out. The kitten scrambled up a nearby tree, running out onto a slim branch that hung over the water. He clung to the limb, clearly terrified by his first storm.

Lissa wailed. “We can’t leave without Luke!”

“Shush, love, of course we won’t.” Madeleine, though tall, could not reach the kitten. “Come, Evan, climb upon my shoulders and mayhap you can reach Luke.”

She bent and let Evan scamper up on her shoulders, his legs hanging down, swinging happily. She stood under Luke, but Evan could not grasp him as the kitten moved back and forth with every noise that rang from the sky. Madeleine urged Evan to stand upon her shoulders, but the little boy did not have the skill to do so.

Lissa was crying heartily now. Drops of rain hit Madeleine in the face. She hesitated, knowing she must go up into the tree and reclaim Luke, or Lissa would be heartbroken. But the thought of climbing that high made her heart rebel, pounding so loudly she thought it might pop from her chest.

Madeleine had never understood her fear of heights, only that it had been with her from her earliest memories. Only her greater fear of Henri suppressed it long enough for her to escape from Frothmore by going down the sally port. That had been a much greater height than this tree, but she’d still been deathly afraid.

Oh, Mary, Mother of God, be with me now, be with me now. Please, please, be with me now
.
This prayer echoed over and over in her mind.