My Big Fat Gay Life (16 page)

“You were holding his cock?” I blurted out, astounded.

“Don’t get jealous!” Sebastian said quickly. “Between Justin and I it’s no more sexual than shaking hands. It was just a ploy to get some affection and intimacy from me, which I’m more than happy to give.”

“The only reason I’m jealous is because I’d love to give him some ‘affection’ too!” I joked, using my fingers to make quotation marks as well.

“Ha! You know as well as I do that affection and intimacy are completely different beasts from sexuality. There’s nothing sexual between us at all. I’m the only person I know, apart from Ruth, that Justin feels comfortable enough with to let them touch him like that, and I feel quite privileged with that.”

“So maybe you should give him more affection, but in a healthier way. Hug him more, spoon him at night when you’re sleeping, and just touch him whenever you get the chance. It may help him to learn that cock touching is inappropriate for affection, no matter how close you are to someone. It sounds like he also needs to learn that affection shouldn’t be made light of, or obtained through practical jokes.”

“Good point,” Sebastian said, pondering what I’d said.

Dinner was outstanding: Sebastian is a fabulous cook. We had chicken and vegetable stir-fry with oyster sauce, basmati rice, home made naan bread, and pappadums. After dinner, Sebastian presented a fruit salad for dessert. Sounds healthy, you may think, but you’d be wrong! The fruit salad had cream and chocolate flakes folded through it, and it was exquisite. Luckily we felt comfortable enough with each other to burp, so I showed my appreciation of the meal quite loudly.

“You know how we were talking about affection, intimacy, and sexuality earlier?” Sebastian asked as we lounged on his sofa. “I think I’m ready for the trifecta.”

I gave him a quizzical look, and he laughed as he leaned over toward me. He kissed me on the mouth, his lips lingering longer on mine than our usual platonic kisses of the past week or so. Standing up, he held out his hand to me. I took it, and he pulled me up from the sofa and led me to the bedroom.

We entered the bedroom, wrapped in a passionate embrace and kissing as we fell on the bed. We lay there for a short while, kissing and slowly touching each other through our clothes. Eventually, Sebastian stood up and started to remove his shirt. I stood up to help him.

After he’d shed his shirt and his magnificent chest was on display, I kissed his neck. He went weak at the knees, and we fell back against the wardrobe, rocking it slightly. There was a slight thud as something fell off the top of the wardrobe and hit the carpet next to us. It was a camera.

“NO!” Sebastian cried. “NO! no! no! How could he?” He sank down on the bed, looking totally deflated.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, sitting next to him. Cujo jumped on the bed with us and did his potty dance. I picked up the little bundle of nervous energy, hoping he wouldn’t pee on me.

“Bruce must have put that there,” he said, pointing at the camera on the floor. The reality of the situation dawned on me.

“You should phone the police immediately,” I said. “I’ll take Cujo for a quick walk.”

“What a way to kill the mood,” Sebastian observed. I kissed him briefly before I left the apartment with Cujo in tow.

I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. All I can do is watch Sebastian. I either follow him throughout the day, or watch him on the spycam when he’s at home. I have to make sure he’s safe, and that he’s being loyal to me.

That arrogant bastard, Justin, had slept with Sebastian for the last three nights. I could see on the spycam - which was still working perfectly - that they were just sleeping in the same bed: they weren’t having sex. His fish must have kicked him out for being on the downlow and having an affair with Sebastian. At least Sebastian had come to his senses and stopped fucking the arrogant dickhead as well. Now he wasn’t getting his end wet at either source, and serve him right!

Kento and Sebastian hadn’t met for lunch since the police came looking for Kento at his apartment. He must be in hiding, so I found it curious today when I saw him peering through the window of the sushi bar at lunchtime. He was taking a big risk: the police must know his routine, and Sebastian was still going there every day in the hope of trapping Kento there long enough for the police to come and take his black ass away. I crossed my fingers that he’d go inside. I hoped that Sebastian’s plan to get rid of the smelly black bastard would work out so we could be together. I was to be disappointed though: Kento skulked off without incident.

For the last nine days, the old orange man from Rainbow’s End had been a regular visitor to Sebastian’s apartment building. From my vantage point in the park opposite the apartment building, I could see Orange coming and going. Sometimes he was alone, and sometimes he was with Sebastian. I followed them to movies and restaurants. I followed them for long walks along the towpath or around the park. They must be discussing something at work as colleagues, as I knew they weren’t having sex: they were never in Sebastian’s bedroom. That is, until tonight.

Orange had entered Sebastian’s building an hour ago, and I kept my gaze riveted on the spycam viewer running on my laptop. I was concerned about the laptop power running out. I used to charge my laptop at the closest coffee shop so that I could still watch the spycam, but today they’d refused me entry. Not having time to argue, I went to the park and settled on my usual bench. I had to find another power source, and soon.

As I watched the spycam viewer, I saw Sebastian and Orange slowly enter the bedroom. They were locked in an embrace, and appeared to be kissing quite passionately! What the FUCK?! Has Sebastian lost his mind? Has he forgotten our love? Doesn’t he remember the deep, pure, spiritual connection we have? In only a few more days we could be together: enough time would have passed since I left that black bastard Kento to allow Sebastian and I to be together - without raising any eyebrows, or making the smelly black bastard angry.

Then it struck me: Orange had tricked Sebastian somehow. He had drugged him or used some sort of hypnotic suggestion on him to make him think Orange was me. This had to stop!

I stared at the laptop, totally engrossed with the spectacle on the screen. They were laying on our bed, kissing and running their hands slowly over each other. Suddenly Sebastian stood up and started to undo the buttons on his shirt. Orange stood up and started to help, and as the shirt hit the floor the two men wrapped each other in an embrace and fell against the wardrobe. The movement must have jolted the spycam, because it moved and went black.

Concern for Sebastian’s safety flooded my brain. I threw the laptop into my backpack and fled across the park towards the apartment building. As I was getting close, I saw Orange exit the building with the yappy little rat on a leash. I stopped running and stepped behind a tree. A plan formed in my mind.

Reaching into my backpack, I pulled out a sheathed blade. I’d prefer to have a handgun, but here in the UK they are too hard to come by: not like the good ol’ US of A, where you can buy a handgun at Walmart. With knives you have to be up close and personal, but with a handgun you can distance yourself while protecting the ones you love.

I discretely followed Orange into the park and watched as he waited for the rat on a leash to piss. When it had finished, they headed deeper into the park. After Sebastian and I are together, he’d have to get rid of the rat. I prefer my pets to be bigger - far more vicious. Soon they were in a section of the park that wasn’t as well lit as the rest. I unsheathed the blade and crept up behind the orange man silently, however the rat saw me and started to yap, causing Orange to turn. His eyes widened when he saw me.

“NO!” I screamed at him, plunging the blade deep into his gut. He collapsed into me, and I held him up with my free arm.

“You… Will… Not… Hurt… Sebastian,” I said through gritted teeth, emphasising each word with another thrust of the blade. He became too heavy for me to hold up, so I let him drop to the ground. The life had fled from his eyes, and they stared sightlessly into the night sky.

Becoming aware of the barking rodent, I turned the blade on it too. Why force Sebastian to rid himself of the annoying piece of shit - especially when I’m happy to do it for him. It’s final yap turned into a shrill squeal.

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