My Butterfly (3 page)

“No,” she finally said and then started walking again.

I hesitated for a second but then caught back up to her.

“Now, have you really thought this through?” I asked her. “You can take some time if you need it. Tell me tomorrow or the next day or the next day or any day when the answer is
yes
.”

“I don’t need time,” she said.

I stopped and smiled.

“You do realize it’s only a date?” I asked. “If you said
yes
, you wouldn’t be locked into anything.”

She turned her face up at me and smiled.

“It’s not so easy hearing no, is it?” she asked.

I paused and tried to hold back my grin.

“Julia, Jules,” I said, as if I were a used-car salesman. “Jules, look, no rocks this time,” I said, showing her my open palms and then the inside of my jeans pockets. “No big, rubber balls. I’ll even let you drive my truck.”

I held out my keys.

She looked at me sideways and sympathetically smiled, as if I were the weird kid who was completely oblivious to his social status.

My own smile grew, and I took her silent cue, as I watched her sympathetic grin fade into her new smile—the one that I already loved. I remembered it being that cute, girly kind of smile—that smile that made you wonder why you despised girls so much just the year before. But now, it was sexy too. It was girly and sexy, all at the same time. Damn it, she was too darn cute not to smile back at her, even when she was saying no. And maybe it wouldn’t be now, but I would eventually wear her down. Everyone has a breaking point. Retreat. Replenish. Conquer. I smiled wider.

“So, Ben’s having a bonfire next weekend,” I said.

“So I’ve heard,” she said.

She smiled politely this time.

“You going?” I asked.

“If Rachel has anything to do with it, we’ll be there early,” she replied.

“Good,” I said, nodding my head.

Suddenly, she stopped and peeked her head into a classroom.

“Coach Hill, you didn’t see any volleyballs lying around after P.E., did you?” she asked him.

My eyes instinctively fell to the floor at my feet.

“Okay, thanks,” she said and then continued her hike down the narrow hallway.

“No luck?” I asked her.

“He didn’t see any,” she replied.

“Don’t worry, we’ll find it,” I said.

We made our way down the rest of the hall and then outside toward the school’s only other hallway. I held the door for her as she walked in.

“So, you and Rachel are friends?” I asked her.

I watched her as she peered into the band room, littered with instrument cases, chairs and stands.

“Yeah,” she said, without looking up. “She’s pretty cool.”

“Yeah, she’s all right,” I said. “She talks a lot, but she’s all right.”

“You’ve known her for awhile?” she asked.

Her thin frame was still preoccupied with the search, and every once in a while I would act as if I were looking under or around something.

“Yeah,” I said. “All of us townies pretty much grew up together. Rachel was my neighbor when we were kids, until she moved to a house right outside of town. I’m sure it was kind of the same for you guys, right?”

I picked up a chair and looked under it.

“Us country folk, you mean?” she asked, pausing to look up at me.

She sounded as if she
were trying to act offended, but I could tell it really didn’t bother her.

“Julia, my dear, I know that toy tractor in front of my grandpa’s store wasn’t the last tractor you’ve driven,” I said, with a boyish smirk smeared across my face.

She stopped what she was doing and looked me square in the eyes. She was wearing a half-smile, but I didn’t so much see the smile, and the other half scared me.

“Don’t call me
dear
,” she said. “And you’re right, turns out I found some much bigger tractors to play with. I didn’t need yours after all.”

She smiled, and then her dagger eyes fell from mine. I let out a happy sigh and followed her back into the gym again.

“I just don’t understand where it could have gone,” she said, dramatically throwing her hands into the air.

I silently prayed that she wouldn’t look up.

“Hey,” I said, stopping in front of her.

I took a chance that she wouldn’t punch me, and I grabbed her small hips and hoisted her up onto the stage.

“Look, it’s late,” I said, looking at the imaginary watch on my wrist and positioning my body so that it was square with hers and touching her legs.

She looked a little thrown off, but she didn’t protest.

“We’ll look for it again tomorrow and the next day and the day after that, if we have to,” I said. “And we’ll keep looking for it, until it turns up.”

Her eyes fell to her lap. She looked defeated. And I wasn’t sure if she even noticed that I was touching her.

I dramatically sucked in a big breath of air. Then, I brought the back of my hand to her chin and gently lifted it until her eyes were in mine.

“We’ll find it,” I said.

She smiled a pouty smile.

Damn it. I loved that smile too.

“It’s just my favorite,” she said. “I bought it with my babysitting money. I’ve had it for a long time.”

Ugh. For the first time, I started to feel bad about hiding it from her. I paused, while the words,
Let’s look for it in the rafters
, fumbled around on my tongue.

But quickly, there was a second thought. That precious ball of hers could buy me some precious time with her. Time, I quickly and easily decided; I wanted time.

“I’m sure it’s in a safe place,” I reassured her.

She half-heartedly smiled.

“Thanks for helping me look for it,” she said, meeting my gaze.

My eyes immediately turned guilty, and I quickly tossed them to the floor before she could read them.

She sighed, and then I looked up again.

“In the meantime, are you hungry?” I asked.

Her green, suspicious eyes were on me fast.

“I was thinking maybe we should grab some dinner at Donna’s,” I continued.

“Will Stephens,” she scolded and pushed past me, jumping off of the stage and landing with both feet onto the wooden gym floor.

“Nice try, but I’ve got to get home,” she said, grabbing her duffle bag.

“Maybe tomorrow then?” I called out after her as she made her way toward the glowing exit sign.

“Bye, Will,” she said, glancing back one, last time and sending a confident smile my way.

I smiled, then shoved my hands into my pockets and watched her walk away until her thin frame disappeared into the hallway. When she was gone, I sighed, shut my eyelids over my eyes and allowed my head to fall back. A second later, I forced my eyes open, and then gradually, I felt a grin returning to my face because high up in the ceiling was her little, white volleyball.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s in a safe place,” I mumbled, chuckling to myself.

Then, I lowered my head and started my own journey toward the glowing, red exit sign.

Caught

“I
don’t know, Jules,” I said, tossing a tennis ball into the air and catching it. “We might be searching for this volleyball for the rest of our days.”

She turned her face toward mine. Her blond hair was in a ponytail and was spread every which way over a straw bale left over from archery class. I had constructed us a pretty nice lounging bench using the bales, and now we were each lying against a home-made straw pillow. She was squinting. The sun was in her eyes, and her big eyelashes looked as if they were trying to shoo away its rays.

“I’m sure it’s somewhere safe,” she said and then turned her head again so that it was out of the direct path of the sun’s rays.

I lifted my head off the straw bale.

“You don’t seem that worried about it anymore,” I said.

“Hmm?” she asked, as she turned her face back toward mine and used her hand to shield her eyes from the sun.

“It’s your favorite ball, right?” I asked. “You still want to find it, right?”

“Oh, yeah, it’s not that big of a deal,” she said.

I hesitated before I continued.

“Well, I mean, it’s got to be around here somewhere,” I said, fearing my time with her might be coming to an end. “Maybe it’ll just take a couple more days.”

“Uh,” she said, shrugging off my comment and turning her head again. “We don’t have to look for it anymore. It’s okay.”

“No,” I almost shouted, sitting up.

I paused then and took a second to regain my composure and to clear my throat.

“Actually, you know where we haven’t checked?” I asked.

“Hmm?” she replied, not bothering to turn her head this time.

“The shop,” I said. “We haven’t checked the shop.”

I watched her shrug her shoulders again.

“I don’t think it’s in the shop,” she said.

She was facing away from me, and her eyes were closed, so I took the opportunity to stare at her without her knowing it. And why was she acting so strange all of sudden? A few days ago, all she wanted was that dumb ball. Now, it seemed as if she could care less about it. She was a strange creature, but she sure was pretty. She was about an hour removed from volleyball practice—little, spandex shorts, cut-off tee shirt and all. Pretty.

“You know where we haven’t looked?” she asked, opening her eyes and turning her face toward mine again.

I sat back against the straw bail, startled, hoping she hadn’t noticed me staring at her.

“Where?” I asked.

“The rafters…in the gym,” she said.

My heart stumbled and then came to a complete halt for a second. Then, I watched the corners of her lips slowly start to turn up, and I couldn’t help but smile too.

“The rafters?” I managed to get out, through my grin.

“Mm hmm,” she said, nodding her head.

We were both silent for a moment, each searching the other’s eyes.

“Yeah, we could look there,” I eventually said.

Just then, she shoved my shoulder. She shoved it hard, but it didn’t do much to move me, in the end.

“Will Stephens,” she said, raising her voice and now standing over me.

She was pouting, but she was smiling too—sort of.

“I know you put it there,” she said.

My jaw dropped open. Caught red-handed.

“I…,” I stuttered. “How, how do you know?”

She rested her hands on her hips.

“Rachel told me,” she said. “She saw you do it.”

Damn it, Rachel.

The corners of my mouth started to turn up again. I knew they weren’t supposed to, but I couldn’t help it. She looked so darn cute. And besides, it had been worth it. That ball had given me her undivided attention for a week. As it turned out, I had grown to love that dumb ball after all.

“Jules, I promise it wasn’t on purpose.”

I sighed and then lowered my head. That was a lie. I couldn’t lie to her.

“Okay,” I said. “It was on purpose, but I had to.”

My gaze traveled back up to her face again, while she dropped her shoulders and dug her dagger eyes deeper into my forehead.

“You knew I was looking for it,” she said. “I just don’t get why…”

“Wait,” I interrupted her, as a smile slowly started creeping its way
back to my face again. “When did Rachel tell you?”

Rachel couldn’t keep a secret to save her life.

“The day I lost it,” she said. “I ran into her later. You were also supposed to tell me that she was looking for me.”

“Wait,” I said again. “You knew where it was and that I had put it there this whole time, but you still pretended to look for it with me.”

Had she liked hanging out with me too?

She narrowed her eyes at me, and I knew she had read my mind. A new, obnoxious smile beamed across my face now over the obnoxious one that was already there.

Then, I watched as she grabbed her duffle bag from the ground and slung it over her shoulder.

“Will, the point here is that you threw my ball into the rafters,” she said. “Nothing ever comes down from there.”

I really tried hard, but I couldn’t stop smiling.

“You’re such a child,” she said, letting out a deep sigh and then turning and walking away.

I sat there frozen—and speechless.

“You owe me a ball, Will Stephens,” she called out over her shoulder once she had gotten several yards away.

I watched her strut into the sun as I leaned my back against the straw bale in our makeshift bench again. There was a permanent smile now tattooed to my face, and on that smile in big, bold letters, I was pretty sure it read:
Today was the best day of my life. Today, I learned that Julia Lang actually liked hanging out with me.