My Special Forces Boyfriend Trilogy

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Copyright Page

Dedication

My Special Forces Boyfriend, Part 1

My Special Forces Boyfriend, Part 2

My Special Forces Boyfriend, Part 3

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A
lex and I had first met in the second grade. I don’t recall exactly when or where our first words were spoken to each other, but I think it may have been in Mrs. Rosenberg’s English class. I was seated behind him, one row back from the very front. I used to daydream about him, long before I ever worked up the courage to actually talk to him. I remember thinking about his amazing smile and his black hair that was always combed neatly to the side.

Years went by, and Alex and I started to talk more and more. All through elementary and middle school, we were inseparable. Still, though, we remained only friends. He dated other girls and I dated other guys. But even so, I often spent time wondering why Alex and I weren’t together. My friends wondered the same thing. Our connection was deep and we got along amazingly. And something in my gut told me that it was meant to be.

So in high school, I finally worked up the courage to talk to him about it. Alex smiled wide and said “yes,” the moment that I mentioned the idea of me being his girlfriend. It was like he had been waiting our whole lives for me to ask.

That was sophomore year. We were young and naïve. The whole world and our whole lives were ahead of us. We were invincible and connected on every level, spending every waking moment together.

It was perfect.

Until it all fell apart.

***

“L
indsey, what do you want me to do?” Alex shouted, as he paced back and forth in his room, the door closed so that we wouldn’t wake up his parents. “It’s too late. There’s nothing I can do about it. I already signed the freaking papers.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as I sat on his bed. Anger, frustration and mostly sadness filled my body, overwhelming me with emotion. I did my best to swallow it down and then I spoke.

“Alex...” I said. “Why didn’t you talk to me about this? Why did you wait until we graduated high school to tell me that you were signing up for the fucking military? You told me that you were going to marry me.”

Alex continued pacing, his skinny arms poking out of his over-sized t-shirt as he moved quickly back and forth across the small bedroom. His black hair was combed to the side, just like it always was. He looked as nerdy, but as cute, as ever and even though I was unimaginably pissed, I still couldn’t deny my attraction to him.

“Listen,” he said, as he finally stopped pacing and took a seat on the chair that was in front of his desk. “Just listen to me, Lindsey.”

Then he turned to face me, resting his elbows on his knees and looking me straight in the eyes.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you right away about me joining the military,” Alex said. “I know that I should have, but I also know that you would have done everything you could have to talk me out of it. And it’s the right thing for me to do. It’s also the right thing for you and I, at least in the long run. You know that I wouldn’t have gotten accepted into any good college, so the military is my only shot at making something out of myself and being able to support you in the way that you deserve.”

The tears that had been building in my eyes finally overflowed and began sliding down my cheeks, taking my black mascara with them.

“Alex,” I said. “I thought you loved me and wanted to be with me.”

Alex closed his eyes and I could tell that he was holding back some tears of his own.

“I love you more than anything, Lindsey,” he said. “That’s why I decided to join the Navy in the first place.”

I brought the back of my hand up to my face and rubbed it across my cheeks, attempting to dry my tears.

“I just wish you would have told me, Alex,” I said. “You’re always so secretive. You’re my boyfriend. Out of respect, you could have at least told me what was going on. I wouldn’t have tried to talk you out of it and even if I did, it would have been for your own good.”

Alex brought his hands together then leaned his head forward. I noticed as a couple of tears fell from his eyes, landing on the carpet below.

“You just need to support me on this, Lindsey,” he said. “I need you now more than ever.”

“Alex,” I said. “I don’t want you to leave. But if everything you’re telling me is true, then there is no way to back out of your commitment. You’ve signed the papers, given the next four years of your life away. So I’m going to do everything in my power to support you and your decision. But I hope that you can understand why I’m upset. My boyfriend is leaving me.”

Alex kept his eyes to the ground and slowly shook his head.

“I’m not leaving you, Lindsey,” he said. “We’re still together, I’m just going to be gone for a little while.”

As upset as I was, I knew that he needed my support. But there was one thing that I still wanted from him. It was one thing that I had been asking from him for years that he still hadn’t given me.

“Okay, Alex,” I said. “If we’re still going to be together, then make love to me right now. I need to know that what’s between us is for real. I need to know that you’re the one for me, even though you’re leaving in the morning. Please take me for my first time, right now. Give me that at least, Alex.”

Alex lifted his head, looking me in the eyes once again. As he did, I parted my knees a bit, causing my mini skirt to slide upward toward my waist. My panties were exposed to him and he brought his gaze to my crotch immediately.

“You aren’t leaving me until you take my virginity,” I continued. “We’re both eighteen now, which means your overly-Christian family can kiss my ass. I was going to wait until we were married, but since we have no idea when that will be happening...”

I parted my legs a bit further, giving him an even better look at my crotch. Just the thought of finally losing my virginity created a tingle in my loins and caused my panties to grow damp.

Alex moved his gaze from my crotch to my face then back to my crotch again. I noticed a bulge beginning to grow underneath the front of his jeans and it became clear that I was turning him on. We had talked forever about losing our virginity to each other, but it hadn’t happened. He wanted to get married to me first.

“Come on, Alex,” I said, opening my legs even further, causing my skirt to slide all the way up to my waist.

I looked down at my white panties, noticing an obvious wet spot in the front that had already begun to form. Alex sat forward on his chair and even from across the room, I could see his blue eyes dilate with an animal lust. A smirk crossed his face, revealing his white smile, which I had fallen in love with so long ago.

Keeping my knees parted, I placed my hands behind me on the bed and leaned back slightly, causing my chest to push up in the air. My perky, developing breasts pushed upward against my tight, blue t-shirt.

“Just take me, Alex,” I said. “This is your chance. Right now.”

Alex awkwardly stood up from the chair and walked over to me. He was standing directly in front of me, his crotch as the same level as my own. I watched as he grabbed the bottom of his t-shirt and pulled it over his head, revealing his skinny, but somewhat athletic, body.

“God, Lindsey,” he said, looking down at my crotch and then to my breasts. “I want you so bad right now.”

After he spoke, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against mine. We had kissed many times before, but this time it felt different. There was more passion behind it. Maybe it’s because we both knew it could be our last kiss for a long time.

As our tongues darted quickly in and out of each other’s mouths, I brought my hand to his back and let my fingers slide down toward his ass. Then I pulled him against me, grinding my pussy up against the bulge in his crotch.

I moaned into our kiss as a wave of pleasure coursed through me. Alex kept his lips pressed against mine and then slowly pulled away, looking me in the eyes.

“I’m sorry, Lindsey,” he said. “I can’t do this. Not yet. Not now.”

What the fuck?

I was quickly becoming less sad and more angry. I had been one of the most popular girls in school and here I was, practically throwing myself at Alex, to no avail. He must have seen the anger in my eyes, because he immediately apologized again.

“I’m sorry, baby,” he said. “I just don’t think that we should do this when we both know I’m leaving in the morning. I want our first time to be special and not forced. Besides, I won’t be gone for long.”

I placed my hands on Alex’s chest and pushed him away from me, immediately closing my legs, shutting him out and away from my sex.

“Goddammit, Alex,” I shouted, with anger and desperation in my voice. “Why are you being like this? You’re acting like such a little pussy. Just fuck me!”

My flower was throbbing in my crotch. I had gotten so turned on, only to be let down, like always.

Alex reached to the floor and picked up his t-shirt, pulling it back over his head.

“I’m really, really sorry, Lindsey,” he said. “I just don’t want to hurt you. I want our first time to be sacred and this just isn’t the right time. Can you please respect that?”

I stood up from the bed for the first time that evening. Alex was standing in front of me with a calm expression on his face, uninfluenced by my emotional storm. Suddenly, I just unleashed on him. I slapped him once in the face and then began pounding on his chest; my hands balled up into tightly clenched fists.

“Why?” I shouted. “Why in the fuck are you doing this to me?”

Alex stood there, not backing down against my punishment. Then he reached his arms around me and held me close. I dropped my hands, realizing that hurting him physically was not going to get me what I wanted.

“I just don’t want you to leave,” I said, as I began to slowly let my guard down. “This isn’t how it was supposed to be, Alex. We were supposed to get married and have kids and live the dream life that we had always talked about.”

Alex held me close, affectionately rubbing my back with one hand. I could hear his heartbeat in my ear.

“I promise I won’t be gone for long,” he said. “I swear that I’ll be back soon and when I get home, we’ll get married and make this relationship legitimate. We just have to be patient right now.”

I closed my eyes and slowly nodded in agreement.

“Okay,” I whispered. “Okay...”

Alex kissed the top of my head and then placed his hands on my shoulders, prying me away from him.

“Look at me,” he said.

I wiped the tears from my eyes and looked up at him, just like he had asked.

“Promise me,” he continued. “That you’ll wait for me, no matter what.”

I swallowed and wiped my cheek once more, causing the mascara to smear across my skin. I took a deep breath and thought about what he was proposing: A promise. A promise that said he would be my one and only, despite the fact that he was going to be leaving for an unknown length of time. It wasn’t an easy promise to make, but since I didn’t believe that there was anybody else in this world for me besides Alex, I gave him the only appropriate response I could think of, for better or for worse:

“I promise,” I whispered.

***

T
wo years passed. I had left home to go to a private college, which was in a neighboring state, but still hours away from my hometown. I didn’t know anybody there and the change was difficult for me. My anchor in life, Alex, was no longer there to help keep me grounded and I was forced to venture out of my comfort zone all by myself.

And to make matters worse, as soon as Alex finished boot camp, he was sent to war overseas. So the last time that I had seen him in person was in his bedroom, right after high school graduation.

We had kept in touch, through emails and the occasional written letter. But each month that went by, our contact became less and less. It started out where we would exchange an email once a day, but by the end of two years, it happened maybe once a month.

However, despite the fact that we had slowly started to lose touch, I never once broke my promise to him. I hadn’t gone out with a single guy since arriving at college and I had no intention to. I promised the man that I loved that I wouldn’t leave him, no matter what, and I aimed to keep that promise.