Nameless Series Boxed Set (4 page)

Erin sighed in
pleasure. Couldn’t remember the last time she’d had sex this good. Maybe the
alcohol had loosened just enough of her inhibitions. Or maybe Seth was just
that good in bed.

After a minute,
his weight started to feel less pleasant. Became a little uncomfortable. She
poked his shoulder. “Did you faint?”

He gave a huff
of amusement and lifted his head from where it had been buried in the nook
between her neck and shoulder. “Absolutely not. So did it meet with your
expectations?”

Erin raised her
eyebrows. “Not bad.”

He frowned at
her disapprovingly.

Grinning, she
admitted, “It was great.”

Adjusting his
arm, he idly pushed a stray piece of hair off her damp cheek.

Erin cleared
her throat. “Well?”

“I have to
agree with your assessment. It was great.”

Nodding, Erin
sighed in contentment. “All right. We’re both satisfied with the outcome. Get
off me now. You’re getting heavy, and it feels like you’re going limp. The
condom will leak.”

“I think we can
find a more appropriate descriptor than to say I’m ‘going limp.’”

Erin felt
herself shaking with amusement again at his offended expression. “Right. Sorry.
Your hard, impressive manhood is returning to its normal, but admirable state."
She paused. He still didn't move. "But, seriously, Seth, get off.”

He nodded and,
holding the condom in place, carefully pulled out of her. Then he swung his
legs over the side of the bed and stood up, walking naked over to a small trash
can.

Erin stretched
in languid satisfaction, realizing she was going to be rather sore, but she saw
Seth frowning as he looked at his hands. “What is it? Something wrong with the
condom?”

“No,” he said,
shaking his head, “I don’t think so. It doesn’t look like it broke. There was a
lot of extra...wetness, but we’d already determined...”

Erin tried to
growl at him and ignored the fact that the covers beneath her were damp. “Don’t
start with that again. It was just a fluke. Not evidence of any particular
talent of yours in bed.”

“If you say
so,” he said with a little smile. “You want to stay the night?”

Erin thought
about it for a minute. “Nah. It’s not late yet, so I think I’ll head back to my
dad’s. I’m twenty-seven, but he still worries sometimes.”

Seth’s face
changed, and a haunted expression replaced the casual amusement.

Swallowing, Erin
remembered the funeral they’d attended that day. She felt a surprising swell of
tenderness rise up in her chest.

He glanced over
and seemed to notice her expression. Their eyes met, and they shared something
in the silent gaze.

Something
abstract. Indescribable. Powerful.

Then it was
gone.

Seth arched his
eyebrows. “Then you’d better go assuage his worries.”

Erin snorted
and rolled out of the bed to collect her scattered clothes. “I can’t believe
you can use the word ‘assuage’ after the night we’ve just had.”

He grunted.

Giggling, she
started pulling on her clothes. “That’s more like it.”

When she was
fully dressed, she turned back to him. He sat on the side of the bed watching
her—his expression thoughtful and guarded again, despite their light banter
just moments before.

She knew what
this encounter had been for him: a temporary reprieve, an escape, an interlude
not connected in any way to his real world.

Exactly as it
had been for her.

“Take care,
Seth,” she said softly.

“Thanks. You
too.”

There was
nothing else to say. She felt a tiny clench in her belly.

But she and
Seth shared nothing but a night of great sex, and there was no use in
pretending that they did.

***

Twenty days later, Erin sat by
herself on the edge of her tub in the bathroom of her apartment in downtown
Atlanta.

Her heart raced.
She breathed erratically.

And she stared
at a little white stick.

She glanced at
her watch. Then back at the stick. Couldn’t believe this was happening to her.

She’d thought
the only truly stupid thing she would do in her life was marry Marcus.

Her evening
with Seth was like a dream now. The memory was warm and pleasurable but didn’t
feel real at all. It had been random, disconnected, fleeting.

And it wasn’t
supposed to come with any consequences.

Erin kept
staring at the stick until she saw what happened to the line on the end of it.

The irony was
appalling

It was like a
scene from a movie. A clichéd story about someone else.

There was
really no other response to be made, though.

She closed her
eyes. Dropped the pregnancy test on the floor.

Muttered under
her breath, “Oh, shit.”

Erin sat in the sleek waiting
area of the downtown law firm where Seth worked and hoped she wasn’t going to
throw up.

At this point,
she wasn’t sure whether her nausea was from an afternoon case of morning
sickness or from escalating nerves. As far as she knew, it could be both.

For the last
few weeks, she’d been sick every morning, and, although some days it would fade
as the morning progressed, other days she felt ill all day.

She’d known to
expect it, of course—everyone knew about morning sickness—but that didn’t make
it any easier to suffer. Going into work every morning was horrible now, and by
lunchtime she was so exhausted she wanted to cry.

Today, however,
she had another reason to feel miserable.

She had to tell
Seth she was pregnant.

She’d known for
nearly a month, but she’d spent the first two weeks going through an agonized
deliberation about what she was going to do about the unexpected pregnancy.

She’d never felt
a strong urge to have children—certainly had no dreams of being a single
mother—and she wasn’t that eager to settle down into domestic life at the
moment, even if a child hadn’t been part of the deal.

So the decision
hadn’t been simple or easy. In fact, it had been painful and had taken a long
time to make. She still wasn’t absolutely sure she’d made the best choice.

But she was
having this baby, and she was going to keep it.

She wasn’t
entirely sure why.

Even after
she’d decided, it had taken her a week to get up the courage to contact Seth.
She’d considered not telling him at all—since she didn’t really want him to be an
integral part of her life.

Eventually,
however, guilt pressured her into it.

He was the
father, and so she should really tell him, no matter how much she wanted to
keep his kind of dominant, controlling personality away from her and her baby.

Not that he was
all bad. She’d had a good time with him that night, and he’d treated her well.
But she knew that evening was an exception for him and he lived his life, like
Marcus, assuming he would always get his way.

Maybe Seth
wouldn’t want anything to do with her or their child. As far as she was
concerned, that would be the easiest and best option.

She’d called
for an appointment with him in the office, without telling him what it was
about, and it was now one minute before their appointed time. Erin’s belly churned,
and she felt chilled and kind of weak.

From the
pregnancy or from growing anxiety, she still wasn’t sure. When you felt like
crap, it didn’t necessarily matter why.

She just wanted
to get this over with.

At precisely
three o’clock, a receptionist announced that Mr. Thomas was ready to see her. So
Erin stood up and smoothed out her skirt, taking solace in the fact that she
looked pretty decent, even though she felt like a disgusting mess.

Composing
herself with hard determination, she walked into the office. Scanned the classically
decorated room quickly and then approached his desk.

Seth, looking slick
and professional, stood up to greet her. He gave her a cool smile, shook her
hand with a courteous, “Good afternoon,” and then gestured her into a leather
chair next to the desk.

This was the
Seth she’d expected today—not the warmly clever, rumpled man she’d fucked
several weeks ago.

Erin sat down. Took
a few deep breaths to dispel the nausea. Summoned up her courage and hoped she
wouldn’t start babbling.

“So,” he said
slowly, giving her a sharp look and leaning back in his chair, “I can’t figure
out what you’re after. A job?”

He looked so
confident, so smug, that Erin's sense of irony kicked in. The edge of amusement
did a lot to calm her nerves, so her voice was clear and crisp as she replied,
“Actually, no. I’m very happy with my job and have no desire to work in a law
firm. Although I certainly appreciate your unyielding belief in your own
importance.”

Seth blinked at
her.

His expression
didn’t change in any concrete way, but Erin knew she’d surprised him, taken him
off guard. He had probably already—before she’d arrived—planned out a strategy
for dealing with her. So, now that his expectations had failed to materialize,
he was going to have to think on his feet.

“It’s something
else,” she continued, taking advantage of his temporary speechlessness. She’d
learned the ambush tactic with Marcus. If she wanted him to agree to something,
she had to catch him unaware, without giving him time to harden his will in any
particular direction.  “Something I need to tell you of a more personal
nature.”

He lifted his brows
slightly, and she thought she saw curiosity flicker in his eyes. “And so you
requested a
business
appointment with me?”

She shrugged. “What
would you have thought if I tried to call you at home?”

“You don’t have
my private number.”

“I know, but assuming
I could find it. What would you have thought?”

“That you were...”
He paused strategically, as if searching for a diplomatic word. “…making
advances on me.”

She was still
nervous and a little light-headed, but she was composed enough to chuckle
appreciatively at this. “Exactly. And I didn’t want there to be any confusion
on that issue. I have no interest in you romantically.”

She felt better
getting that said, putting up her defenses, making her strongholds clear.

She’d learned
the need to do that with Marcus too. Otherwise, any decision she made became
irrelevant.

“Excellent. I’m
glad to hear it. So I won’t misinterpret anything that occurs here. So what was
it you wanted to tell me, then?”

Erin had
considered various ways of approaching the issue, but she’d decided the blunt
announcement would be the easiest. For her, anyway.

So, “I’m
pregnant.”

Seth blinked
three times.

Erin didn’t say
anything else. Just watched him carefully. Tried to gauge his reactions and
also give him a little time to process what she’d said.

After a moment,
he adjusted his hand on the desk. His fingers flexed and then relaxed, but that
was the only move he made. “And I’m to assume it’s mine?”

“I wouldn’t be
here otherwise.”

Seth’s eyes
never left her face, and he appeared to search her expression for an underlying
motivation or agenda. “And have you decided what you’re going to do?”

For a moment,
she hesitated. She’d decided two weeks ago, but telling Seth—the first person
to whom she would speak the words—would make it real. Would make it final
somehow. “I’m having the baby.” She met his eyes directly. “And keeping it.”

He inclined his
head—not quite a nod but close to one. Then he asked something she never would
have expected. “Why?”

Erin felt
ridiculously put on the spot. “Do I owe you an explanation? Why does it
matter?”

 “I was just
curious. I never would have expected you to make that particular choice.”

Resentment rose
up in Erin unexpectedly, even though he was simply voicing thoughts she’d had
more than once herself.

He looked at
her with elevated eyebrows, as if he fully expected she’d tell him whatever he
wanted to know. As if he were entitled to such private information from a woman
with whom he’d spent only one night.

“What right do
you have to presume to know me at all, particularly regarding a choice like
this? Women like me don’t always choose to do only one thing. You’re making
superficial assumptions, and those usually end up being wrong. Too many factors
go into making a decision like this, and there’s no way to predict what a woman
will choose to do.”

She’d thought Seth
would be a little peeved at her response, particularly since her tone got
rather sharp as she built up the momentum of her argument.

But he simply
nodded. “You’re right.”

This surprised Erin
so much it took a minute to recover her focus.

“You’re sure
it’s mine?” he asked, smoothly moving back into the discussion. He didn’t
appear to be shocked or upset by the news she’d dumped on him. In fact, he
looked very much like he was discussing a case with a new client.

That fact
actually gave Erin some comfort. It would be better for all concerned if Seth
treated this only like business. That way, he wouldn’t try to interfere in her
life and things wouldn’t get complicated. “It’s yours. Other than you, I
haven’t had sex with anyone in four months.”

He revealed no
reaction to this statement either. “You won’t object if I request a paternity
test? I don’t mean to doubt your word, but I’d rather be careful—”

Erin didn’t let
him finish. “Of course, I’ll agree to a paternity test, but I assure you this
isn’t some roundabout way of snaring you for a husband and creating a happy,
little family. I don’t want to be a family. I just felt obliged to tell you
about the pregnancy.”

Seth appeared
to think about her words for a long time, but, when he spoke, he had changed
the subject. “We were protected.”

 “We used a
condom, but obviously it didn’t work.”

For the first
time, Seth’s brow lowered. “I know how to use a condom. We double-checked it.”

“Things happen.
Even when used perfectly, condoms aren’t a hundred percent effective. Or maybe
there was a tiny tear that you didn’t see. We’d been drinking.”

“At that point,
we weren’t
that
drunk. I would have noticed.”

Erin rolled her
eyes. “Yes, I’m sure your powers of observation are infallible, even when
half-intoxicated and midway through a fuck. The condom might not have torn.
Maybe it leaked a little before you pulled out. The fact is we’ll never know.
And why does it matter now anyway?”

“You seem to be
very settled about all of this.”

Erin almost laughed.
Ironically, of course. “Yeah, well, you missed all of my weeping and wailing
and bemoaning my fate and angsting about my choices. I’ve had some time to get
used to it.”

His eyelashes
flickered slightly. “Almost seven weeks.”

She couldn’t
tell if there was a reproach in those words or not. “I considered not telling
you at all. I have no desire to deal with any unnecessary complications.”

He closed his
eyes, as if he were suddenly tired. “And what exactly do you expect from me in
all this?”

“Nothing,” she
said immediately, glad she had such a good opportunity to speak her piece. “This
isn’t going to be a Thomas baby. It’s going to be a Marshall baby.” She held
his eyes, didn’t let hers drop.

 “So I’m effectively
closed out?”

 “Not closed
out. I just don’t want there to be any confusion about this.
I’m
the one
who’s going to make decisions regarding this baby’s life and future. You’re
welcome to be involved, though—as little or as much as you’d like. As long as
you don’t try to take control.”

“
Monetarily
involved?” His voice was almost bitter.

Erin
straightened her spine with a jerk when she realized what he implied. “Fuck
you, Seth. I’m not asking for money, and I wouldn’t take any from you if you
offered it. How dare you insult me like that?”

He didn’t look
contrite. Merely skeptical. But apparently her outrage had some kind of effect,
because he finally said, “Right. I can see why that would have offended you.”

“I’m glad you
can see that. The truth is, if I’d had a choice, I would have gotten pregnant
by someone other than you.”

Seth blinked
again.

Suddenly, Erin
realized that her words had sounded crueler than she’d intended. “I don’t mean
that personally. I had a good time with you. But the fact that you’re...well,
you
complicates things considerably.”

He released a
long breath. “Okay. If we can keep this uncomplicated, I’d like that too. You
don’t want me to be involved monetarily, but I’m allowed to be involved in
other ways?”

She made a
face. Had no idea how he would feel about any of this, and she wasn’t getting
any clues from his behavior now. “Only if you want to be. Naturally, you can
know the...the...your child and spend time with him...or her.”

“And, later on,
would I be allowed to spend money to provide certain things? Like education,
for instance?”

Erin squirmed
in her chair. Felt both hesitant and a little bit sick. She hated the idea of
being dependent on Seth in any way.

Money had been
the primary way Marcus had gotten her to go along with his agenda in the two
years they’d been married. He made the money, so he made the decisions.

That was why
she’d refused to take any money from him after the marriage ended, even though
everyone told her she was stupid not to. She wasn’t going to give her ex-husband
any more power over her.

“I guess so. I
mean, it would depend on what it was. But, yeah, some things like that would
probably be all right. But this isn’t going to be a Thomas baby.”

“Yes. I
understood that when you said it before.”

She wondered if
she’d insulted him. She didn’t want to, but it was so important that she set
necessary parameters. She knew too well the consequences of just going with the
flow and giving a strong man too much control over her life. She wasn’t going
to do that with her child.

Seth just sat
in his chair, looking at her.

Finally Erin
became a little uncomfortable. “You don’t have to decide now about how much
involvement you want. I’m not asking for anything. You don’t have to be
involved at all. I’ll even sign something saying that I’ll never come and ask
you for anything. Or, you can just keep track of things from the sidelines.” This
was the idea that appealed to her the most, so she tried to make it sound
attractive. “I could keep you informed, by email or whatever, about what’s
going on. But you wouldn’t have to be personally involved, so it wouldn’t be a
substantial change in your life.”