Nash (34 page)

now. Anticipation crawled like a living thing across the phone line.

“It is.”

“Like all the same artists are at the shop?” Man, she was insistent.

I made a face at my phone.

“Yep. We’re all still here and getting ready to add a whole new crew in the next few months.”

“Phil is maniacal. That guy just loves to mess with people’s lives.” She laughed a little and I wondered

what Phil had been thinking with this chick. She seemed a little off-kilter to me, but the old man was a softy

for a killer face—always had been.

“Listen, Salem, I have to get someone in and on top of shit fast. The new shop is opening at the end of

May, the old shop is swamped. Either you’re interested or you’re not, but I don’t have time to screw around

if you’re not into it. This was Phil’s great idea, not mine.” And I wouldn’t tell her I would do anything to

make him happy and make him smile while he was still here to see it.

“Oh, I’m way more into it now. Look, I have some stuff lined up until the end of April. I have to do

Viva Las Vegas over Easter weekend, I have a photo shoot for a tattoo magazine in New York the weekend

after that, and I have to give the shop here notice that I’m bailing. It snows in Colorado, right?”

I was having a hard time following her rapid change in conversation. I was still stuck on Viva. Being a

car guy, I knew all about the weekend hot-rod show that drew bands and old-car lovers from all over the

world. I was starting to think Phil had sold this girl’s qualifications short.

“Yeah, it gets cold here when the seasons change.”

“Well then, I need to add shopping to the list as well. Let’s plan for the first week in May. I’ll be there

with bells on.”

She was talking like the job was already hers.

“You have to do an interview. I have a business partner and a business manager that you need to talk to

before this is a done deal.”

She laughed and it sounded husky and rich. Even over the phone, I could tell this lady was something

else.

“I’m perfect for the job and I’ve never been to Colorado. It’ll be an adventure.”

“Why the sudden interest? You sounded bored earlier when I called you.” I was curious and had to ask.

“Tattoo shops are a dime a dozen, but you guys are doing amazing work, and I like the idea of getting in

on the ground floor of a place with a solid reputation that’s looking into expansion. And my interest”—her

voice changed to something I didn’t understand—“is anything but sudden. I’ll see you in May, Nash

Donovan.”

She hung up on me and I was left looking down at my phone trying to figure out what in the hell had

just happened. I wasn’t kidding about her having to interview, and I could see her and Cora going rounds.

It would be entertaining, to say the least.

I put my phone in my back pocket and pushed through the nondescript doors of the Bar and let my eyes

adjust to the dimly lit interior. Since it was before eleven in the morning, the bar was quiet and the only

customers lined up at the actual bar top were the grizzled old veterans that had called the Bar home long

before Rome and Asa had taken over. No one looked up at me but Asa caught sight of me as he rounded

the outside corner of the bar, arms loaded full of cases of beer.

He lifted a sandy-blond brow at me as I walked over and took some of his burden from him. Asa didn’t

really jibe with the rest of the group. His motivations were suspect, his personality was a little too smooth, a

tad too polished for the rest of us to really dig into, but Ayden loved him and Rome had developed an odd

fondness for the southern charmer, so even though he was slippery and slick, he was integrating his way

firmly into our merry band of misfits. Jet watched him like a hawk and I was more of the mind that until he

proved otherwise, he was an okay guy to be around.

Plus he pulled hot tail like I had never seen before. I didn’t know if it was the southern twang, the

golden eyes, or that “aw shucks” attitude he artfully played with, but he was a certified babe snake charmer

and before Saint had become my sole focus his talents with the opposite sex had been much admired.

“What are you doing here so early?”

I helped him shove the beer on the end of the bar and he walked around the long wooden surface that

Rome had just recently refinished, and faced me from the other side. Rome might be the technical owner of

the bar, but with the new baby and the bar being open practically all day and night, Asa was the one often

making the day-to-day operation run. He was also a million and one times more personable than the gruff

ex-soldier, so they made a pretty good team.

“I wanted to ask you some stuff before I have to be at the shop. Do you have a minute?”

He cocked his head to the side and regarded me silently. It was no secret Asa’s choices in the recent past

had almost gotten him killed—and nearly had his sister disowning him—so it wasn’t like anyone was

rushing to him for words of wisdom.

“Yeah, I got some time; this is the last of the liquor order and I’m just waiting on Brite. He called and

told me he would be in later and he had a huge favor he needed to ask me. Want me to have Darcey feed

you lunch?”

I shook my head. “Maybe on my way out. I’ll take something back to the shop for everyone.”

He nodded and tilted his head to the back of the bar, where the pool tables were located.

“Let me stick my head in the kitchen and tell Darcey to keep an eye on the front.”

I wandered to the back room and hopped up so I could perch on the edge of one of the pool tables. I

folded my hands together and watched as Asa came toward me rubbing his hands on a bar towel.

“She’s gonna throw a bunch of sandwiches together for you.” I nodded. Darcey was Brite’s ex-wife—

well, one of them—and she ran the bar kitchen. She was a nice, older lady and her BLT was close to heaven

as far as I was concerned. “So what’s up, Nash?”

I sighed and winced a little. “This is sort of awkward, but you were the only one I could think of to

ask.”

Both of his eyebrows shot up and he crossed his beefy arms over his chest. Asa looked like the kind of

guy that wrangled horses or threw bales of hay around all day. He didn’t do either of those things, but there

was no missing his country upbringing in the way he looked and carried himself.

“About what?”

“About changing and perception.” I rubbed the back of my neck. “I have history with this girl I’m

seeing, not exactly pretty and shiny history, and I don’t really know how to get us past it.” One of his gold

eyebrows danced up on his forehead and I felt like a total chick trying to get into all of this with him. Dudes

were not supposed to have heartfelt conversations about feelings, but I was at a loss.

“Saint had a rough go of it in high school. She was awkward and shy, got picked on and made fun of. I

guess she had a little bit of a thing for me and I sort of blew her off without really meaning to. It was

forever ago, but it stuck with her, and to make matters worse, I was running my mouth like an idiot and she

thought I was talking about her. That topped with her dad being a cheating asshole and a college boyfriend

throwing her over because she wouldn’t do what he wanted in bed and I’m having a hell of a time getting

to the heart of this girl. I know the self-esteem shit wasn’t helped by my big mouth and general stupidity,

but I can’t figure out how to get her to trust that I’m not like that. That really I’m a decent dude that was just

a dumb kid prone to making mistakes. How did you do it? How did you convince Ayden that you’re a

different guy after everything that went down between the two of you? How did you get her to let the past

go and prove to her you’re not going to let her down again?”

He just stared at me for a minute, and I thought maybe I had offended him. He snorted and gave his

golden head a sad little shake while he hooked his thumbs in the belt loops of his jeans.

“I didn’t. Ayden loves me, wants to believe the best in me, which makes her the best person in the

world because I used her, flat-out abused our relationship up until a few years ago. I wasn’t just a mean

guy, Nash. I was a criminal, a con artist, and I didn’t stop to think how what I was doing would affect

Ayden. She was really just a means to an end, and I never saw it until it was almost too late. Frankly, Ayd

has every right to hate me, and I wouldn’t have blamed her for leaving me in that hospital alone. Now …”

He grimaced and I saw him swallow hard. “I’ll never be able to fully convince her or Jet that I’m living a

different life. When the bar got robbed a few months ago she thought it was me, even though I like Rome,

like my job here. She automatically assumed I had something to do with it and she always will, and I can’t

blame her for it. I wasn’t trustworthy or considerate in the past. The only person I cared about was myself

and that’s not a memory I can erase—ever.”

I hadn’t ever been privy to the inner workings of their sibling relationship, but it made more sense why

Jet was so leery around the guy, and why there was still so much tension between him and Ayden. There

was no bridge in the world tall enough to let all that water run under it.

I threw my hands up in the air and let them fall. “So there isn’t anything I can do? She’s just always

going to equate me with that memory and never be able to fully trust me. That blows.”

“Nash …” His drawl seemed a little more pronounced when he said my name. “You’re a good guy, they

seem to grow them by the bushel here in the Rockies. You don’t have to do anything but be who you are.

Eventually she’ll see that it isn’t an act, it’s just who you are, and what happened in the past was a one-off

moment. You’re human. You have to be allowed to make mistakes back then and now. I wouldn’t be alive

if there wasn’t the gift of second chances.”

“I like her, more than I’ve ever been into another chick. I just feel like she’s never going to get past it

and that means no going forward.”

“I won’t give you all the gory details, won’t drag my own sordid history into it, but trust me: if my sister

can still look at me and find a way to care about me, then you can work yourself into the heart of this girl.”

Man, maybe I shouldn’t have been so quick to think Asa was an okay guy. The more he divulged, the

more I kind of wanted to knock his perfect teeth out on Ayden’s behalf.

“So what about you? You weren’t a nice guy and now you are?” I asked it questioningly. “How do you

convince everyone you’ve really changed?”

When he smiled at me it was full of mischievousness and secrets I didn’t think I wanted to know.

“I haven’t changed. I’m not a new person. Every day I still have to talk myself out of taking the easy

way out, out of sliding into old patterns. I am who I am, and it isn’t always an enjoyable person to be. The

difference now is I have a life I want to live. I want a relationship with my sister. I want Jet to eventually

look at me and not wonder what my next move is. I want to help Rome make this bar a success so he can

support his family. I like it here, there is value in this life I never had in Kentucky, and I will fight with

myself until I take my last breath to maintain it. I might not deserve it, but it’s mine and I’m keeping it.”

Wow. I hadn’t planned on Asa being so up front about his own history, but his words struck something

inside of me. I had been trying to convince Saint I was a different guy from the one she remembered from

back in the day. That wasn’t really true. I was less angry, less in need of validation from my mother, but I

had never been a bad dude. I was so busy trying to show her the value in the person I was, I forgot that I

had always had value, even if I did get busted running my mouth and acting like a typical teenage idiot.

Maybe I needed to start asking why she couldn’t see the value and worth in herself.

She was amazing. Smart and funny. She was gentle and completely lovely inside and out. She tore me

up in bed, and if I could just get her to let go, quit holding on with both hands to things that would never

change, I had a pretty good idea I would tumble head over heels in love with her. I was pretty close to the

edge of that precipice as it was. Maybe I needed to stop trying to make her see how great I was and start

making her see, reinforcing with her, how great she was.

I jumped off the table and thudded heavily on the wooden floor.

“Thanks, Asa.”

He laughed a little and I followed him back to the bar. “I’ve made enough mistakes for the lot of you to

learn from. Something good should come from all my fuckups.”

“I really hope you don’t go back to your old ways. It would suck for more than just Ayden.”

That grin was back, and this time it was tinged with sadness.

“Got a good thing going here, and I know it. It’s not on my agenda to screw it up, though my agendas

never really have a way of working out the way I think they will.”

I gathered all the to-go containers Darcey put together and let her kiss me on the cheek. I was walking

out when I heard her ask Asa if he had seen her daughter yet. I had a feeling Brite’s favor he was about to