Natural Attraction (21 page)

He continues to look at my lip and then moves his eyes back to mine and sighs.

“I can’t kiss you right now baby, because if I do, we won’t make lunch.  You fix your hair, I’ll find the smallest shirt I have.  And don’t worry, it won’t be thin.” 

He says this grinning cheekily and pecks me chastely on the lips once again before heading out to his wardrobe.

I draw in a huge breath of air as I realize that I have been holding my breath.  God damn it.  Now I think I can add frustration to the list of emotions that I have been experiencing over the past two days.  Apparently God loves me
and
hates me at the same time.

One for the road

“Are you sure we are not supposed to bring a thing?” I ask Jax on the drive to his parents’ house.  “You know, shouldn’t we take some chocolates or something, like the advert on television says – ‘
The thing you bring when you’re told not to bring a thing’.
”

“Nope.
  You never take anything to Ma’s for Sunday lunch.  She’d be offended.  Every meal has a theme and she never lets us know what that theme is in advance.  She does this so you can’t work out what to take.  Today might be Indian, so if you bought a Greek salad it wouldn’t fit her samosa and curry theme.  Taking something out of theme would just piss her off.  It’s what Ma does.  She plans all week for Sunday lunch and no one gets a choice on what we eat or what we bring.”

“Oh-
kayyyy.”  I roll out the word as I lift my eyebrows and look at Jax with that look that suggests tiy think someone is a bit nutty.

“Strange and unusual but I suppose I can work with that,” I mumble.

Dear Lord what am I doing here? 

What am I doing sitting in the passage seat of what I have worked out
is a near new Chevy Silverado Dually with one of the hottest guys I have ever seen?  What am I doing letting him drive me to his
mothers’
house for Sunday lunch?  

A guy I met once for five minutes and then spoken once on the phone to for another five minutes.  I then decide to spend an entire weekend with him, which has included sleeping his bed.  On top of that, he is calling me baby and constantly touching me like we’ve known each other for years. 

Not that I should be complaining about all the touching and time spending.  To be honest I am having the best weekend
of my life.
  Between spending time with Jax and all the amazingness I am experiencing with Maverick, I feel like I’m living in a dream. 

Do I really have to go home?
 

It’s funny to think that on meeting this guy all those weeks ago, my first plans had been to make him my future husband.  Now that I am already wondering what it would be like if he was my boyfriend, I suppose I should be pleased the plan looks like it’s coming together. 

It’s even scarier to think that I am now reviewing my first thoughts and wondering if there is some reality there.  He keeps telling me he wants to spend time with me and see what we have together.  Isn’t that a weird statement to be coming from a guy who looks like he could tempt the panties off any female between the age of twenty and fifty by just sitting next to them?

Why, after all these years of not caring about any of the guys I have ever spent time with, am I suddenly letting this one drag me all over the place and even to his
mothers’
house?  

I have
never
met any guys’ parents before,
ever.
 

That sort of thing is what boyfriends and girlfriends do.  Considering I have never had a boyfriend, or spent more than one night with the same guy, I’m not sure why I’m agreeing to this.  To be acting like some meek little lady who lets the man make all the decisions just isn’t me?

Or is it?

I suppose it probably has something to do with the fact that he’s so bossy and just doesn’t give me a chance to make any decisions other than the ones that he thinks are right.  In a strange way, I like it.  He’s not trying to butter me up all the time and get me to bed, a novelty you could say.

“What’s got your cogs grinding?” I hear Jax say as he drags me from my musings.

“Nothing much, just reflecting on my weekend so far.”

“And how is that weekend working out for you?” He asks with a small smirk on his face and an eyebrow sneaking up above his sunglasses. 

Damn those sunglasses, I can never see those bottomless blue eyes to work out what he is really saying.  I hate not being able to read his eyes direct.  I reach out and pull his glasses off his face.  He looks a bit surprised and swings his eyes back to the road.

“I don’t like not being able to see your eyes,” I tell him.

“Maybe I don’t want you to see my eyes,” he says, focusing heavily on the road ahead.  He seems to be giving it far more attention than he was before I took his sunglasses off.

“Why?” I ask.

He quickly glances towards me and knots his brows with concern.  A hint of what I almost see is pain fleets across his eyes before he flicks them back to the road. 

“’Cause I’m worried I’ll scare you off.”

Huh?
 

I’m not too sure what that means and I feel myself take a sharp intake of breath.  I see Jax wince at the road and his body visibly stiffen.  He is holding his breath as well. 

We drive along in silence for a while, both pondering his last words with neither of us willing to take a real breath and continue the conversation. 

After what seems like ages, but in reality I am sure it is only seconds, I see and hear Jax blow out slowly.  He then carefully clicks the indicator on and starts to slow the truck.  He remains focused on his driving as he slides us to a halt on the roadside and kills the engine.

When the last little whir of the engine finally silences, he swings in his seat to skewer me with those two crystal blue eyes.  Like a rabbit in the headlights, I stare direct back into his eyes and start to lose myself in their crystal depths.

“Ash.”
  He stops to consider his words carefully.  “I know we’ve only just met and this all seems
really
weird.  Fucking weird, I know it is.  I just need you to hang in there until we get past the weird.

There is someth
ing about you that makes me want to make sure that you know me.  All of me.  Some of me you have already seen, like the horse stuff, and some of it, the harder stuff to talk about, I have yet to tell you about.  Other parts are all about family and you’ll see that today. 

I can’t explain why I feel this way, and I bet you can’t explain why you’re still here getting to know me and my life either. 

One thing I
can
tell you is that a like you.  A lot.  I can also tell you that you are only the second woman who has slept in my bed.  You are also only the second woman I have taken to meet my family.  I don’t bring woman home, I go to their houses, fuck ‘em and then I do whatever it takes to keep them separate from my life.”

I continue to stare into his eyes dumbfounded at his words.  Right now his eyes are ocean blue and intense.

“Why me?” I whisper as I start to chew nervously on my bottom lip.  I am starting to regret having taken his glasses off.  I start to feel like his eyes are going to burn holes in mine.

“’Cause the first time I met you, you were broken.   I could see that and I could see that you were a fighter.  You were all bashed up but not yet willing to give up on your dream.  Most girls would have taken the injuries you received from Maverick as a warn
ing and run for the hills.  You didn’t.  In fact, having now learnt that you have been injured multiple times, by multiple horses, I can see you are no quitter.

I once knew a girl like that.  I once
loved
a girl like that.  Loved her so much it hurt to spend more than a few hours away from her.  Then I lost her and my world died, I ceased to exist.

For three years, I have been runn
ing on fumes and spending my days focussing on horses.  Nothing else.   I’ve been to pubs and clubs to pick up women.  I’ve even dated some of them for a few weeks.  None of them ever came under any illusion that I wanted to share my life with them.  In any way.  I
never
bought ‘em home and I never let them meet my family. 

Getting to know you, watch
ing you with Maverick over the past two days, has been something Ash.  It is making me feel alive again and I don’t want you to see how that is affecting me.  If you can see my eyes you are going to see a desperation there that it is not fair on you to see.  You are going to see that I am desperate to hang onto this alive feeling and I’m not sure how far I can push you before you run screaming ‘cause it is all too much.  Too much, too quick.  Do you get that?”

Wow.

I guess that means he is
really
interested?

This guy sure knows how to get his feelings out on the table for review.  Once again, how should I respond to that? 
Should I tell him that I am having weird feelings too?  Weird feelings similar to his? 

In my normal life I would have just blurted the whole lot out but this weekend has not been my normal life.  I am starting to have concerns that if he sees me in all my unfiltered glory he won’t be feeling so desperate to spend time with me.

Shit.

I decide to go with a small version of the truth.

“I get it, probably more than you realize.”

I breathe out slowly and keep the rest to myself.  I get the feeling he senses I have not said all I am going to say and I see a questioning look fleet across his eyes. 

To avoid further awkwardness I turn to look out the window but soon feel his fingers lightly touching my chin to turn my face back to him.

“Thank you.  Hang in there okay?”  He says softly.

He leans in and gently brushes his warm lips across mine before letting his fingers drop to my lap where he plucks his sunglasses out of my hands.  He quickly settles them back on his face.

“Okay
,” I return softly.

He restarts the truck and we continue on the way to his parents’ house.

*****

Jax’s parents’ house is huge.  

Perched on five acres on the outskirts of a small country town, everything about the house and its outbuildings can only be described as
big.
  The house is two stories of red brick grandeur with balconies and verandas everywhere.   

Attached to the house is a four-car garage with all the roller doors currently open
.  With the doors open you can see all the spaces are taken up by various old classic cars.  The sorts of classic cars you only see at car shows and in the movies.

Further on from the house I can see a large dam with two small islands.  Next to the dam is a large permanent gazebo with gardens of shrubs and flowers
spiraling around it. 

Further on past the dam are three massive colorbond sheds.  Each big enough to be a factory which gives them an industrial look.  Facing away from the dam with wide concrete driveways that exit onto the street at a different point to the house driveway, I wonder who needs such huge sheds.  Massive lights and security cameras are dotted all around the sheds and driveway.

“Jax, what do your parents do for a living?” I ask needing to understand what the big sheds are for. 

“Civil engineering.
  They have a separate site where they keep most of the trucks and digging equipment.  Dad sometimes brings big pieces of equipment home to work on them, therefore the big sheds.  One of those sheds is Ma’s car shed though.” 

He smiles and I’m guessing that it’s the thought of his mothers’ car addiction that makes him do so.

I muse on the sheer enormity of the sheds as Jax pulls into a large concreted car park area between the house and the sheds.  I look across to see another black Silverado, almost identical with Jax’s already parked.  The main difference between them being that the other one has two child restraint seats in the back.  

I guess it belongs to his brother Luke and his wife
Teagan.  

Next to it is parked a big black Jeep Commander.  The tough version of a people mover that I guess has to be Ryan’s and Rebecca’s because of their larger family.

I then decide that his parents need this car park because there’s no way their boys would be able to park these monster trucks in a normal driveway. 

I also decide
that black is the Walker color of choice.

Jax shuts off the truck and leans across me to open his glove box and grab out a big bag of mixed lollies.  I take one look at the lollies and then give him a questioning look as he realizes he has been caught out.  He grins at me and says, “They’re not for my parents.”

He slams the glove box shut, launches out and quickly races around the truck to open my door.  I barely have time to get my seat belt undone when his hand is on mine and he is dragging me out of his truck.  He slams the door and hauls me towards his parents’ front door.

As we approach the front door I see it swing open and
Teagan  appears, beaming at us both.  Not long after, two small boy’s rocket out from behind her.   One has neat and short red blonde hair  with his fringe spiked.  He is screaming “Uncle Jax is here!”

The other, slightly smaller with a mop of messy raven black hair screams, “Unc Ax is ‘ere!”

They both
do this loudly.

I feel Jax’s hand stiffen in mine as he braces himself against the
impending collision with the two boys.  He does this just as they slam direct into his legs, screaming and jumping about with excitement.  He quickly shoves the bag of lollies into the older boys face and says, “Reece, make sure all the kids get some.  You know the drill,
don’t tell Grandma!”