Naturally Naughty (17 page)

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

“Landon?”

“What?”

“Can we go back to sleep now? I promise I will never get in the car with anyone who looks like Tony Curtis.”

“Real funny, Shannon.”

I laughed and hugged him tight. “It was just a bad dream, baby. Go back to sleep.”

Landon finally held me close, but I swear he gave me another suspicious look before pulling me over his knee.

“What are you doing?” I cried out in alarm.

“I’ve decided you need to make this up to me,” Landon said, as he stroked a hand over the naked flesh of my bottom and lower back.

Moaning, I rocked my bottom against the erection pressing insistently into my belly; suddenly sleep was the last thing on my mind.

His hand began to slap down on my bottom with no discernable rhythm, spanking me a few times and then stroking the heated flesh until I was writhing over his lap and trying to rub my clit against his knee.

“None of that, young lady, I’m not convinced you’re properly contrite yet.” Landon pulled my thighs wide open as he continued to pepper my bottom with hard smacks while my hips undulated in response.

Soon his fingers began to play between my thighs, expertly bringing me to the brink but not letting me go over it, again and again.

“Landon!” I wailed when he lifted me off his lap and put me back in the bed.

He grinned wolfishly at me as he sat back against the headboard, his stiff cock standing proud in his lap. “I said you could make it up to me, baby.”

I eagerly crawled to his side of the bed and leaned down to take the tip of his erection into my mouth. I licked all around the plum-shaped head like it was my favorite sucker, then greedily took it all the way inside my mouth and hummed around it as I sucked hard.

Soon Landon grabbed me by the hair and began to thrust himself down my throat. I swallowed around him as he hit the back of my throat, wringing a groan from him.

“So good, baby… so good,” Landon growled before pulling me off him and lifting me to straddle his lap.

Our lips met in a hungry kiss as I impaled myself on his waiting shaft, sinking down until I felt his balls pressing against my opening.

We both groaned at the depth of our joining, Landon’s fingers gripping my sore ass tightly as he rocked me up and down on his shaft.

Then he slammed me down hard and held me in place as he ground himself up into me, the head of his cock rubbing deliciously against my cervix. We came together, holding each other tight as we shuddered in release.

Landon lay down on the bed, pulling me close to cradle me against his chest. “Thank you, baby. I needed that.”

I yelped when his hand clapped off my bottom hard one more time. “Remember, I’m watching you,” he said before closing his eyes, snoring before I could even react to the swat.

I shook my head, then snuggled close. What did I ever do?

Great Aunt Gert

Christmas was almost upon us. It was a time for sharing love and laughter with the ones I cared about. It was a time for singing, pretty lights, and holiday treats.

It was a time for Great Aunt Gertrude.

I sighed as I thought of Christmas Day. It should be a wonderfully exciting day. As Landon’s new wife, I was getting to make my very first Christmas dinner. Hosting his family and mine in our home.

I love cooking and entertaining so it should have been a joyous prospect, but all I could think about was Great Aunt Gertrude.

Where does one begin to explain Gertrude? When James, Landon’s dad, was ten, his parents had died and Gertrude had leaped in to raise him as her own. She pampered and spoiled James shamelessly; she’d done the same for Landon when he came along. James and Landon both adored her.

As far as Gertrude was concerned, nothing was too good for her boys; unfortunately in her opinion, the women that her boys had chosen fell short of the mark.

To put it bluntly, sweet adoring Great Aunt Gertrude became hell on wheels when it came to my mother-in-law Helen and myself.

I knew exactly what would happen once she stepped into my humble abode. I’d seen her do it with Helen on countless occasions.

She would walk in the door and sniff as if she’d caught a whiff of something horrendous, then shake her head sadly as she took off her hat. She’d leave her white gloves on long enough to run a finger along the tops of a few doorframes and exclaim at the dust. Then she’d make comments about my choice of home décor.

I couldn’t wait to hear what she would have to say about my Christmas dinner.

So there I sat, sighing morosely, as I pored over cookbooks looking for a Gert-proof recipe. Quite frankly, I wished I could serve old Gert up a plate of dirt, complete with worms!

“Honey, what are you doing?”

I glared at Landon. Why did he have to have a great Aunt Gertrude? “I’m trying to find something to prepare for Christmas dinner that her exalted highness won’t be able to find fault with.”

“She’s not that bad, Shannon. I don’t know why you don’t like Aunt Gertie; she’s one of the sweetest women I know.”

“Whatever you say, dear.” The eye roll was truly beyond my control.

“You will be nice to Aunt Gertie, Shannon.”

“Well, of course I will, Landon. I hardly planned to give her a swift kick when she came in the door!”

“You know very well what I mean, young lady. You will be nice.”

“I’m
always
nice. Ask anyone.”

Landon smiled and leaned down to kiss my forehead. “I will agree that you’re nice
most
of the time, but you have your moments, and if you have one with Aunt Gertie, I will be having a moment with your backside.
Capeesh?
”

“Yes, master. I hear and obey.”

He laughed and ruffled my hair on his way out of the kitchen. “Nut.”

I sighed once again and made a decision to be nice to the old bat if it killed me.

* * *

Christmas with the family went pretty much as I had envisioned. My family, James, and Helen were wonderful. They couldn’t compliment my turkey and dressing enough.

Gert was another story. “Shannon dear, you really will have to give me your secret for such a dry white meat… dear, how did you do it? I’ve never been able to get my dressing to turn out this salty… how much sugar did you use in these yams?”

I took it all with a sweet brave smile. Helen and my sister both gave me commiserating pats on the arm and followed one of Gert’s barbed comments with a compliment.

Have I mentioned how much I love my sister and mother-in-law?

My family had to make a quick exit to get to my sister’s in-laws’ festivities. So I was left with Landon’s parents and Attila the Gert.

I told Helen and Gert to relax with the men while I cleaned up. I didn’t want Gert in my kitchen and I figured that if Helen stayed in the living room, Gert would too.

No such luck. I’d just finished putting away the food and was about to do dishes when in walked Gert.

My kitchen got another disdainful sniff. “Do you need any help, dear?”

I don’t know what made me do it. I swear some impish pixie jumped into my skin and took control of my body. I would never do such a thing. Really, I wouldn’t!

I smiled sweetly at Gert. “Oh, no, I’m almost done. Sassy makes doing dishes a breeze.”

I sat a plate down before my dog and watched as he licked it completely clean. Then bent down and picked it up, placing another before him.

“
Voilà!
One down and only twelve to go!” I said enthusiastically as I turned and put the licked clean dish up in my cabinet.

Gertrude blanched, then turned abruptly on her heel and marched out of my kitchen. Mission accomplished!

I could hear Gertrude shouting orders from the other room. “James! Helen! Get your things! We’re leaving at once!”

I walked into the room, all wide-eyed innocence. “What… you’re leaving?”

James gave me a baffled look before running to get their coats. Great Aunt Gertrude refused to look at me. She went and gave Landon a tight hug. “My poor dear boy.”

I ignored the suspicious look Landon shot in my direction.

Helen pulled me to the side. “How did you do it? I’ve been trying to get her to make a quick exit from my house for years.”

“What? I don’t know what you mean!” I pulled the most innocent expression I could muster.

Helen snorted and followed James and Gert out the door.

Landon turned and looked at me.

“What?” I asked.

“That’s what I’d like to know,” Landon replied.

“Landon, I was
nice
. You saw I didn’t respond to any of her constant criticism with anything but a smile.”

He eyed me suspiciously for another minute. “All right, but if I find out…”

“Really, Landon, that hurts my feelings!” I stomped out of the room, returning to the kitchen to do the dishes.

I couldn’t help but grin as I pulled Sassy’s dish from the cabinet and put it in the dishwasher. The look on the old battleax’s face had been priceless!

Later Landon and I were snuggled on the couch when the phone rang. I could hear James’s angry voice and Helen’s laughter from where I was sitting.

“What is it, dad? What? I can’t hear you. What’s mom laughing about?”

I clearly heard James snap, “
Helen,
it’s
not
funny!”

Maybe it was time for me to start putting up the Christmas tree. I started to get up off the couch, but a hand clamped on my thigh and held me down.

“She did
what?
I see… I’m sorry, dad… no, I’ll handle it.”

Landon glared at me as he finished talking with his father.

“Shannon, what were you thinking?”

“I… well… she… I… I don’t suppose it would help to say I was temporarily inhabited by a peapod from another planet?”

He just stared at me. So much for humor.

“Get your hairbrush.”

My bottom began to tingle and flush. “But Landon… I was nice… I…”

“That was a horrible trick to play on an old lady! You should be ashamed of yourself! I know Aunt Gertie can be difficult, but I love her. How could you be so mean to someone I love?”

All of the sudden I felt about as big as a gnat. “I’m sorry, Landon.”

“You will be. Go get the brush.”

I quickly did as I was told and was soon standing before him, brush in hand.

Landon wasted no time; in a flash I was bottom up, panties down across his strong thighs and his hand was lighting a fire in my backside that wouldn’t soon be extinguished.

I yipped and yelped as I jerked over his knee.

Then he picked up the brush. “I can’t believe you let my aunt think the dog did our dishes.”

The brush cracked off my backside with a resounding smack.

“Yeeeooooooccccchhhhh!!” I really need to burn that brush.

“Next time you need a buffer between you and Aunt Gertie, come and get me.”

Each word was punctuated with another stinging slap of the brush.

“Yes siirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! I’m sorreeeeeeeeee!”

Then it was over and I was being cuddled tight to his chest as I sniffled about my stinging bottom.

As he cuddled me, Landon gave a little chuckle. “Shannon, you really are a nut.”

I am… Victorious?

My nephew Clayton and I stood glaring up at the broken tree limb. It hung about thirty feet up in the old pecan tree, bent at a ninety-degree angle.

The storms must have broken it, and there it was dangling pretty as you please above my front yard.

If I had a tall enough ladder, I would simply have climbed up there and sawed it the rest of the way off. As it was, I didn’t have the ladder or a saw.

Well, not a saw big enough for this project. I thought of my small hacksaw; I had a hard enough time sawing the little branches with it. No way was I going to try it on a limb.

I sighed, then inspiration struck. “Clayton, run get me that long black dog leash I had you take into the laundry room.”

Clayton brought it to me, curious to see what I was going to do with it.

He watched as I began trying to toss it over part of the dangling limb. I got it up there a few times, but it was too short to dangle down enough for me to grab it.

“Hmmmm… Clayton, isn’t there another leash in the laundry room?”

“I don’t know.”

“Go check for me, would ya, doodle bug?”

“Okay.”

Clayton was gone and back in a flash, carrying a wide red leash sporting a big rubber dog bone grip at the end near the handle.

“Perfect!” I grinned with enthusiasm as I fastened the hooks on the leashes together then tossed the rubber dog bone easily over the branches and catching it on the other side.

I slipped the dog bone and the end of the red leash through the looped handle of the black leash and then pulled it tight.

I pulled experimentally, holding the rubber dog bone in one and looping the handle around my other hand. The big limb swayed, then came toward me.

It was going to work!

I stepped back, pulling as hard as I could on the leash. The branch bent and made a slight cracking sound, but that was all.

“Ummmm… Shannon… I don’t think this is such a good idea.”

I frowned over at Clayton. “It will be fine.”

“Ummm… I don’t know…”

“Shhh… it’ll work, you’ll see.”

I pulled and pulled and pulled some more. Clayton started helping me to pull too. Nothing… nada… it didn’t even make that cracking sound again.

I sighed and studied the tree branch thinking.

“Ummm… Shannon? Maybe we need Uncle Landon. Maybe we need a man… a strong man.”

I made a face at Clayton, the ever-helpful six-year-old. Chauvinism starts early, doesn’t it?

I decided that if I could get the limb to twist, it would break off the rest of the way and fall to the ground. So I took up the big red dog bone and, holding it high, began to walk in a circle, pulling the limb around with me. I made two circuits when I heard the cracking sound again.

This was promising!