Read Naughtier than Nice Online
Authors: Eric Jerome Dickey
Livvy woke after sunrise and saw the time. She cried. She remembered the funeral and cried softly. Tommie had cried the hardest. She always cried the hardest. Tony woke up a moment later.
Livvy ran her fingers through her short haircut, yawned, said, “Didn't mean to wake you.”
“It's fine. You okay?”
“No. Sad. I feel incredibly sad. We have to go to the graveyard. I don't like death. I hate death.”
“I know it's hard. I'm here for you.”
“Christmastime without her. I'm going to cry all day. I'm going to cry, cry, cry.”
“I know. I know you miss her.”
“Tommie is going to cry too. I have toâ”
Tony moved behind her, put his hand on her belly.
He said, “Look at that little bump. You're showing.”
“I'm going to be so fat. I'm going to be short and chunky and turn into a ball.”
“Before I bounce you and shoot a three-pointer, are you sure it's mine?”
“Don't start.”
“I've already beat one paternity suit. You plan on serving me papers in front of everyone?”
“Asshole. But the look on your face when you were served, that was priceless.”
They laughed. Enough time had passed where the tragedy could be made fun of.
She whispered, “I love you, Tony.”
“I love you so much, Olivia.”
“I'm scared. We're no longer going to be DINKSâDouble Income, No Kids.”
“You're going to be a great slave master. I mean mother. You will be a great mother.”
Things had changed. After that day that had felt like the worst day in her life, things had changed. Dr. Ashley was around for a little while, but soon it was time for her to go. Livvy had made peace with knowing that Carpe was no more, that Panther existed but what they had would never be again.
She had tried to re-create what was impossible to re-create. She couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't keep trying to return to that world.
She had been to Ashley Li what Panther had been to her, and Tony had been to Dr. Ashley what Carpe had been to Livvy. In the end, Dr. Ashley had her sabbatical, had her fun, and when it was done, when that season ended, she went back across the pond. She went back to be with the man who had broken her heart. Livvy understood, even if she didn't agree. She hadn't heard from Ashley.
It was fine. Ashley Li had her own issues and would have to deal with them in her own way. She was attached to Livvy, to Tony, and would have sought permanent residence in America to remain in a ménage à trois, to help Livvy through that difficult period of her marriage by working at UCLA Medical Center while remaining engaged in a domestic arrangement with Livvy and Tony. But it wasn't what Livvy wanted, not for her marriage; maybe with Carpe and Panther, but not in her marriage, not in her home. Livvy had had her last adventure and had found closure. Not all at once, but gradually. Not completely, but enough to move on.
Ashley had had her awakening and took her new predilections back across the pond, smile wide, her anklet sparkling, her high heels clacking.
A woman who had sweet secrets had the best smile.
Olivia had given Dr. Ashley a pair of heels.
She had bought her Welsh friend and brilliant lover a pair of Blahniks, the same style, same color, identical to her most prized heels. Livvy had gifted her companion, the betrayed woman who had learned to fly again, with Lucite and leather T-strap Manolo Blahniks, had their final intimate moments, a sensual celebration, then sent Dr. Ashley on another adventure.
Livvy had been a healer.
Pay it forward.
Always pay it forward.
Soon Livvy had wanted Tony again, only him.
She was able to be with him again.
The river had settled, its course moving in a normal direction. The new earthquake had made things adjust.
Being pregnant changed everything.
It gave her a new focus.
She had new priorities.
Tony asked, “Can you handle going to the grave today?”
“I have to go. I have to go to the cemetery.”
Tony headed for the shower.
Livvy picked up her cellular and called her sister.
She asked Tommie, “Should we swing by and pick you up?”
“Blue is going to drive me.”
“Whoa. That's major. You're talking again?”
“We've been talking quite a bit.”
“You've seen him since you moved out?”
“We went away together for the weekend to see if we could sort things out.”
“And? You're his BAE again? You're his Before Anyone Else, or is it over for real?”
“We'll talk. And
stop
trying to sound hip. You sound
stupid
when you do that, Livvy.”
They ended the call so Tommie could get ready for the trip to the cemetery. Blue was back in her life.
Livvy smiled, almost started crying happy tears.
She went to the glass shower door, undressed, then joined Tony. He began washing her body and she became aroused. She leaned back into him and he washed her breasts, touched her nipples. Since the pregnancy, she was aroused more easily, was aroused all the time, morning dew all day long.
She said, “Can't get me pregnant now, but feel free to give it your best shot.”
“Get ready for my sweetness. It's about to come. Turn around and taste the rainbow.”
“Will you stop being silly and stop imitating that damn Skittles orgasm commercial?”
They laughed, kissed, and joined, then for a few moments made love under the warm waters.
As they made love, more tears rained and she told Tony, “Thanks for being patient with me.”
*Â Â Â *Â Â Â *
After she dressed, Livvy picked up an
Essence
magazine from the stack on her nightstand. Beale Streets was on the cover. The magazine had spotlighted his marriage to Tanya Obayomi, now Mrs. Tanya Obayomi-Streets, a glamorous Nigerian and highly intelligent woman with an MBA, a woman who was also an actress and a singer, and now by many, with her fame-by-marriage, touted as a renaissance woman. After the LA Marathon, after Tommie had given him the note, there had been a sudden engagement, one
spurred by rejection, one that seemed to be out of spite, then a quick marriage in the Hamptons, his adoptive parents at his side, his adoptive brothers and sisters in the wedding party along with Tanya Obayomi's family. Aside from being America's East Coast meets Africa's West Coast, it looked like postracial perfection, if there were such a thing as postracial, if there were such a thing as perfection. It was the anti-
Black-ish,
anti-
Empire,
anti-
Power,
anti-
Scandal,
antiâ
The Haves and the Have Nots,
antiâ
The Real Housewives of Atlanta,
anti-
Being Mary Jane,
and antiâ
Love & Hip Hop
crowd. They were the higher thinkers, the overachievers, the leaders with few followers, the ones who dined with Obama and held benefits for sick babies in underdeveloped nations, the ones who openly chastised all media that used sex, money, drugs, violence, deceit, and drama to line their pockets but ignored that most of their fortunes had come from exploitation of their fellow man. The twentysomething polyglot Beale Streets and his barely twentysomething bilingual bride, his singing and acting Mensa member, they looked handsome together, as if they'd overcome an unseen barrier. Livvy had glanced over the article. Beale Streets was still trying to find his birth parents to settle his issues.
Livvy was still amazed at how much he looked like a younger, less muscular, more learned version of Blue. He could have passed for Monica's father or her older brother. Blue didn't find that humorous.
A copy of the farewell note that Tommie had given him had ended up in Blue's hands.
Beale claimed he had no knowledge of how it happened. The original good-bye letter had been left in his home, with his files. Only one person had been inside his mansion. Tanya Obayomi had been the one. No one cared. They had had insurmountable issues at that moment. The McBroom clan had had greater problems. The world had watched Frankie McBroom fighting for her life and dying on the freeway.
The high-speed pursuit had lasted over an hour and traversed many southbound freeways and just as many counties. The blood. The dying. The death. She died live on air, in front of all of Los Angeles.
Her live death trended on Twitter. It was posted on YouTube.
Livvy had stood next to Tony and watched her sister die. Tommie had stood next to Blue, in agony, terrified and in prayer. It had been a horrible day in Santa Monica. That day in March had been the worst day.
She had needed Tony to get through those rough days. She had clung to him. They had stood united, one heartbeat. Tragedy had brought them back together, as disasters caused families to reunite.
She was going to become a mommy.
Olivia McBroom-Barrera was carrying the next generation of the McBrooms.
Livvy pulled on flat shoes, then gathered her Lucite and leather T-strap Manolo Blahniks, the shoes that had been her emotional favorite; wiped away tears for Carpe, for the first lover she'd ever had die; and she boxed the Blahniks, went downstairs, went outside, put the Blahniks in the curbside trash can as she waved at neighbors, and without looking back went into her living room and stood in front of the Christmas tree. She smiled. She felt like she had a real marriage now. She had evolved. Next year there would be too many gifts for her baby under their tree. New memories would now replace old.
Livvy gazed at the gifts for the living. She wiped away tears and regarded yuletide gifts bought as offerings for the dead. Soon Tony was next to her, wiping away her tears. It was time to go visit those who had gone to heaven's waiting room.
It had rained the day before and that coolness remained in the desert city's winter air. Livvy and Tony arrived at Inglewood Park Cemetery first. The first stop, the McBroom tradition, was the McBrooms' parents' graves. No McBroom would lie while being touched by the spirits of their predeceased loved ones. They would give honor to other deceased family members before they left.
Tony said, “Bernard and Betty Jean McBroom.
Estamos aquÃ. Ya estamos aquÃ.
”
Livvy said, “Mom and Dad. Merry Christmas. And stop speaking in Spanish, Tony.”
Tony said, “Betty Jean,
mi madre,
you're finally going to be a grandmother.”
Livvy slapped Tony's arm. “I was supposed to break the good news.”
“You think she doesn't already know? You think they don't already know?”
“Mom and Dad, we're pregnant. Dad, I know, you think that a man and woman saying âwe're pregnant' sounds
dumb,
especially since only one of us will have swollen feet, but we're having a baby.”
Tony opened up two folding chairs and they sat facing the tombstones. Livvy put a flower down for each parent. She looked across the grave sites and saw Blue's Nissan pulling up, arriving CP Time.
Blue tooted his horn as he passed in search of a place to park.
Tony and Livvy waved, then went back to holding hands.
Livvy said, “You loaned him the money?”
“It wasn't a loan. Gave it to him a few months ago.”
“After Frankie . . .”
“About a month after.”
“Did he have the procedure done?”
“You will have to ask him.”
She asked, “Do you miss Dr. Ashley? She was totally enamored of you.”
“Intelligent woman. We had some very intense conversations regarding our fields.”
“Did you fall in love with her?”
Tony asked, “Did you want me to fall in love with her?”
“I'm not sure. In the beginning, honestly, I think I did.”
“It felt like you did at one point.”
Livvy nudged him. “You fell in love with her.”
“I was becoming attached, but I felt she was more attached to you.”
“I expected that one day I'd come home and find out you were gone to London for good.”
“Same here.”
Livvy said, “I didn't want you gone, but I was afraid to be with you again.”
“Why?”
“Was too afraid of being hurt again. Kept thinking about you and the girl you cheated with.”
“I will never let you down again, Livvy. You're my Betty Jean and I want to be your Bernard.”
“A ninety-nine-year-old man divorced his wife of over seventy years when he found out she'd had an affair eighty years ago. I don't want to have our child and find out you strayed again decades from now.”
“I will be a better husband and the best father.”
Livvy spoke of Dr. Ashley. “She was our bridge over troubled
waters. And we were her friends in a time of need. What do you think we should do now, Tony? After the baby, should we go see her?”
“We should let it fade.”
“Good answer, Tony.”
“It's the only answer, as far as I am concerned.”
“I need to be sure that we're back on track.”
“For the sake of the baby, I need to know you want to be here with us, Olivia.”
“There is no other place I want to be.”
“Livvy? Are we okay? Am I going to end up being a single dad like Blue used to be?”
She laughed. “I'm fine, Tony. We're fine.
Todo bien.
”
“No more Spanish at the grave site. Daddy hates Spanish.”
They laughed a little, better friends now than they had been at the start, a stronger couple.
Tommie eased out of Blue's car and side-by-side they walked toward the grave site, flowers and small tokens in their hands. Livvy put her hand on her belly, held Tony's hand, hoped that tragedy would never befall them. Just as Tommie and Blue made it to them and they all hugged, a Maserati pulled into the cemetery and parked right away. The passenger door opened and Monica hopped out of the car, flowers in one hand, gifts in the other. She ran across the graves to get to Blue and Tommie.
Frankie eased out of her ride, grabbed her metal crutches, limped, and took her time getting to her family. They watched her struggle. Halfway to them, Frankie stood up and held the crutches high in each hand. She danced a jig, then gave the world two thumbs up as she walked a Tyra Bank's killing-it-on-the-runway walk.
Everyone laughed, then stood up and applauded the woman who had died on the side of the road, then been brought back to life in the back of an ambulance as it sped toward the hospital.
Livvy noticed Tommie and Blue. They were holding hands. As
they stood at the grave site, they revealed their secret. Tommie wore a wedding ring. Blue wore a wedding ring.
They had eloped.
Tommie had purchased a simple wedding dress online. Monica had gotten to wear her beautiful white dress.
They'd driven to Vegas a week ago, the three of them.
Tommie was radiant.
She said that she had another announcement to make.
Her next announcement answered the question of whether Blue had had the procedure.