Neon Lotus (37 page)

“Because of
this. When he holds it again, he will remember me—and more besides. The
Governor will clear the way for you to quickly reach Chenrezi. My bright twin
waits. My own time is passing.”

Marianne
walked up to Mahakala and reached up for the lotus, then the vajra, and finally
the golden wheel. She handed them to Dr. Norbu, then turned back for the Wish-Fulfilling
Gem.

She gazed at
Mahakala for a long while, admiring him.

“What is
your purpose?” she asked.

“We are
repositories of knowledge. Our builders, in
their former age of greatness
when they cooperated with humanity, knew that one day there would come a time
of great darkness and ignorance, when these secrets would be needed. They are
beyond your understanding at this time, but the future will bring revelations
to those ready to receive them.”

“My journey
has been a revelation,” she said.

Mahakala
lowered his hands, offering the gem.

“Thank you,”
she said.

“I am
honored to have met you, Gyayum Chenmo,” said the god.

Her hands
closed around the Wish-Fulfilling Gem. It was cold despite the flame in its
heart. Mahakala’s fingers opened, relinquishing the stone. Suddenly his eyes
went dark; his arms stopped moving.

“Mahakala?”
she whispered.

He gave no
response. She looked into the gem and knew that the god had given her his life.

Behind her,
she heard a moan. Dr. Norbu was helping Governor Rato to sit. The Governor
looked around with a dazed expression, then he began to smile.

“They’re
still here,” he said, in his own true voice. “But—but they mean no harm. Can
you hear them?”

Marianne
shook her head. “That’s your gift, Governor.”

“Allies,” he
whispered. “They have so much to teach us. We should honor them.” He looked
searchingly at the darkness. “There were rituals once—”

“There still
are,” said Marianne. “Outside Tibet, there are libraries full of the old
knowledge, and temples that still practice the rites.”

“I have the
power to bring that knowledge here,” said the Governor.

“Is it
true,” she asked, “that the Chinese intend to liberate Tibet?”

He nodded,
looking abashed. “In twenty years’ time. It is a well-kept secret.”

“Your people
cannot tolerate twenty more years like the last twenty. If Tibetan mines are
the foundation of the Great Leap Upward, they may come under tremendous
pressure from the mainland.”

The Governor
nodded again. “I will protect them. I
will stand between my people and China, and see
that all runs smoothly. With the aid of the demons and the three-eyes, our
success is certain.”

“There is a
great deal of mistrust in this land,” said Dr. Norbu. “The people will be
watching you carefully.”

“And so will
Chenrezi,” said Marianne. “With a thousand and twenty-three eyes.”

19. The Wish-Fulfilling Gem

When she
stepped from the boat onto the underground shore, a cheer went up from the
guardians of the living Chenrezi. Marianne grinned, waiting for Jetsun Dorje to
climb out after her. She carried the lotus, Jetsun carried the vajra, Dr. Norbu
held the Dharma wheel, and Dhondub Ling cradled the Wish-Fulfilling Gem as if
it were an infant, his own child. They went quickly up the slope, a crowd
gathering around them. For a time they were busy showing the ornaments to those
who inhabited the cave; but even the guardians soon grew impatient and insisted
that they hurry to present the objects to Chenrezi.

Marianne was
the first one into the dim passage that led to the chamber of Chenrezi, but in
the dark she insisted that Jetsun trade places with her.

“You’ve
never seen Chenrezi,” she said. “You should go first.”

As she had
done months ago, she saw Jetsun hesitate at the portal of the sacred cave. He
stood silhouetted against a vibrant spray of light, then he reached back and
took her hand.

“Let’s go in
together,” he said.

“All right.”

Four carried
the ornaments, but more than that number entered the shrineroom. Along with
Dhondub Ling came his wife Pema and his brother Changchup. Mr. Fang bore an
offering of flowers and silk scarves. All the guardians of the cavern,
including the Khampa sentries, entered in single file, leaving the outer
chamber deserted for the moment. Last of all, anonymous in simple robes, came
the Governor Rato, who had arranged their passage from Lhasa.

The ceiling
of the cavern shone with the light of captive suns as they approached the
center of the shrine. Marianne was blinded momentarily after the darkness of
the outer caves, but when her vision cleared she saw Chenrezi towering over
her. Of his eleven heads, ten smiled in greeting. The eleventh, that of
ever-wrathfui Vajrapani, managed to look pleased in spite of a ferocious scowl.

“Greetings,
Chenrezi,” she said. “We have your ornaments.”

“This is a
great day, Gyayum Chenmo. I had thought for a time that all was lost. The
ornaments I hear fell into the hands of the enemy.”

“Not so,”
she said. “They fell into the hands of Mahakala, who kept them safe until I
could recover them.”

“Talk
later,” snapped Dhondub Ling. “Let’s put these things in their proper places.”

The air was
alive with the sinuous motion of Chenrezi’s thousand arms. One at a time, the
bearers of the ornaments went forward and placed their possessions in
Chenrezi’s extended hands. Marianne went last of all. Gazing into the flower
for a moment while Chenrezi waited, she saw a boy’s face flicker briefly into
existence.

“Goodbye,
Tsering,” she said. “You wanted to see the living Chenrezi. I am placing you in
his keeping.”

“Goodbye,
Gyayum Chenmo,” Tsering called.

The white
palm waited, watching her with an unblinking eye. She set the lotus into it
and then stepped back. At Chenrezi’s touch, a stream of white nectar jetted
from the flower’s heart.

She looked
up at the god to see his reaction. She thought that for a moment even blue
Vajrapani smiled—but then his wrathful visage intensified. The Wish-Fulfilling
Gem sent a rich purple light rippling over the opaline breast of Chenrezi. The
lotus blazed like a flame. The Vajra left a trail of golden mist wherever it
passed through the air. And the Dharma wheel seemed to spin faster and faster,
full of hypnotic lights, until it stabilized into a disk of shimmering energy.
She had the feeling that she was looking into a lens or peering through a gate
that led to other worlds. She had once traveled that mysterious road, flying
through the night from Kham to the Changthang. If she touched the wheel again,
where would it take her? Through space? Through time?

She realized
that Chenrezi was speaking to her.

“I am sorry,
Marianne,” whispered the lowest white face.

“Sorry?” she
said, confused by his attention to her. But looking up at the faces, she saw
that each of them was whispering—though she could hear none of them but this
one. Each seemed to have a personal message for all of those in the chamber.

“I’m sorry
for all that you lost, all that you suffered, in my service,” Chenrezi said.

She managed
a smile, though she felt suddenly close to tears.

“The worst
thing,” she said, “was losing Tara. But I would never have known her at all if
it weren’t for you.”

“But you
haven’t lost her, Marianne. She lives in you yet. She has changed her form,
taken a full step into the terrestrial world in order to be with you. Soon her
transformation will be complete.”

“I—” She
shook her head. “I don’t understand.”

“Did you not
know, Great Mother, that you are pregnant?”

“Pregnant!”
she cried, putting her hand to her belly.

Jetsun Dorje
stood beside her, eyes wide. “Marianne, Chenrezi just told me. . . .” He
touched her face gently. “Is it true?”

She started
to shake her head, but not with denial. She simply could not believe it. It was
still too early to be certain; so early that she had not thought of the
possibility. But she remembered the night in the snowcave, the night of the
mystic heat, and Tara’s own delight in their lovemaking. She remembered also
the deep little pains, the discomfort that might have signified her ovulation.

“A
daughter,” she whispered, clutching Jetsun’s hand. “Tara.”

“You’ve
already named her?” he asked with a laugh.

“In a sense,
she named herself,” said Chenrezi. “It was time for her to come into the world.
She will be your daughter, but she is also a part of myself. I can never leave
this spot, you know, but Tara could. When she is old enough, she will come to
know me. She will learn to read my memories; she will unlock the mysteries of
my existence. Your Tara is the first child of the new age. Tashi Drogon’s work
will show her the way, but by her own genius she will found a technology based
on the science by which I and my ornaments operate. And through careful application
of these devices, all humanity—all sentient creatures—shall one day be
liberated.”

“It is a
prophecy!” said Dr. Norbu, coming forward and sinking to his knees before the
image.

“No,” said
the eleven heads of Chenrezi, lifting the violet gem so that its radiance
permeated the cavern and filled the eyes of all those assembled. “It is more
than that. It is a wish.”

Glossary

Amdo:
The spectacular northern
province of Tibet, comprising prairie land, forests, rivers, and snowy mountains.

Amitabha
: The Buddha
who accepted Chenrezi’s vow to liberate all sentient beings, and who gave
Chenrezi his thousand arms and eleven heads when this vow proved too
overwhelming for the conventional physique.

Amrita:
A divine elixir which brings
ecstasy, purification, and even immortality to those fortunate enough to
encounter it. It is often meant to represent a medicine made from poisons, as
when we are granted the understanding to transform the painful events of our
lives into enlightening lessons.

Avalokiteshvara
:
See
Chenrezi
.

Bardo:
The intermediate state
between death and rebirth.

Bardo Thodol
: The
Tibetan Book of the Dead. A guide for the souls of the recently departed, which
is often read aloud by a Lama throughout the period in which the soul is
presumed to be lost and wandering between incarnations.

Bod-Chenpo
: “Bod” is
the native’s name for Tibet. The natives call themselves “Bod-pa.” “Bod-Chenpo”
refers to Greater Tibet, including the farthest reaches of the country.

Bodhisattva
: An
enlightened being who has forsaken nirvana until all sentient beings have been
freed from blindness and suffering, and who thus chooses to cling to the Wheel
of Life through countless incarnations, pursuing this goal.

Bon:
The ancient religion of
Tibet, a once vigorous shamanic tradition which is in part responsible for the
unique color and fantastic imagery of Tibetan Buddhism.

Buddha
: One who has attained the
state of complete enlightenment.

Changthang:
The wastelands
of northern and central Tibet, marked by scouring winds, vast plains of salt
and borax, and salt lakes whose shores are caked with potash and soda.

Chenrezi
: The god of
compassion, Tibet's father and patron saint, whose earthly incarnations are
known as the Dalai Lamas. Known in Sanskrit as Avalokiteshvara. Although
Chenrezi is worshipped as a male in Tibet, he may be identified with the
feminine Kuan Yin of Chinese myth or the Japanese Kwannon.

Chod: A
ritual in which the ego is
destroyed by self-invoked demons, so that it may not stand in the way of
spiritual attainment.

Chorten
: A sacred tower, a reliquary
housing fragments of honored saints or even the historical Buddha. The chorten
is built in tiers and levels which represent the path to liberation. (Known in
Sanskrit as a “stupa.”)

Chuba
: A common, loose-fitting
Himalayan garment, often with long sleeves which may be drawn back for free
movement of the arms, or folded over the hands to keep them warm.

Chushi Gangdruk
: The
Tibetan resistance, formed in 1958 by Gompo Tashi Andrugstang. Literally, the
name means “Four Rivers, Six Ranges,” which refers to the eastern homeland of
Tibet's first freedom fighters, who in early days were aided by the United
States’ Central Intelligence Agency.

Daka
: Male beings who aid in
meditation, expressing masculine aspects of the mind. (See
dakini.)

Dakini
: Female consort of a
wrathful male yidam, representing the feminine qualities of one’s inner
nature. The distinctive Tibetan representations of these figures may derive
from icons of ancient local goddesses.

Dalai Lama
: The
god-king of Tibet, widely revered as an incarnation of Chenrezi. His Holiness
the Fourteenth Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso, was born in 1935 and has
resided in Dharamsala, India,
since the Chinese occupation of Tibet.

Dawachen
: The Land
of Bliss, a way station along the road to enlightenment. After death, some
diligent souls find themselves reborn from a lotus blossom into Dawachen, where
they may concentrate on perfecting their spiritual development without
distraction.

Dharma:
May refer to the doctrines
of Buddhism, Universal Law, or the pattern of energy which sustains our
universe.

Dorje
:
See
vajra.

Dorje Drakden
: The Spirit
Minister who guides the course of Tibetan history by advising government administrators.
The regular possession of the State Oracle of Tibet by Dorje Drakden is an
important ritual to this day.

Drilbu:
A ritual bell, bearing a
vajra-wand tip. It is the feminine counterpart of the more phallic wand.

Dze:
The female yak.

Gesar of Ling
: Tibet’s
national hero, subject of the country’s greatest epic poem.

Ghat:
The steps along riverbanks
where funeral pyres are burned.

Gyayum Chenmo:
Tibetan
term meaning “Great Mother.” A title generally reserved for the mothers of
Dalai Lamas.

Kagyu:
One of the three main
schools of Vajrayana, along with the Sakya and Gelug schools.

Kali Yuga:
The age of
darkness into which Earth is expected to fall once the teachings of Sakyamuni
Buddha have faded with the passing of time.

Kashag
: The Council of Ministers, a
core group in the Tibetan government; comprised of four lay and monastic
officials along with a prime minister, the Silon.

Kham:
The rugged, mountainous
country of eastern Tibet, where many of Asia’s great rivers have their headwaters.

Khampa:
A native of Kham, or a
descendant of such.

Khawachen:
The Land of
Snows. An old name for Tibet. (See
Bod-Chenpo.)

Lung-gom:
The ancient
technique of trance-walking by which certain of Tibet’s lamas and messengers
were said to have crossed the vast hostile wastelands of the
Changthang on foot and at
great speed, with little need for food or rest.

Mahakala
: Literally,
“Great Blackness.” The wrathful aspect of Chenrezi; a guardian of Buddhism.
Mahakala’s ferocity is that of a mother lion protecting her cubs.

Maitreya
: The Buddha
of the Future, who is expected to visit Earth five thousand years after
Sakyamuni’s life, when the power of the present Buddha’s teaching has mainly
passed away.

Mandala:
A “sacred
circle” representing all of existence. It may be used in rituals as an altar or
an aid to divination, but it is also one of humanity’s oldest symbols for the
soul. A common Vajrayana mandala is comprised of the four directions and the
center. Each quarter is assigned an element, an ornament, and the power of one
of the tantric yogas. The east is associated with water; here the diamond
scepter, or vajra, converts anger into mirrorlike wisdom. The south is the
direction of Earth, where we find the Wish-Fulfilling Gem transforming
arrogance into the wisdom of equanimity. To the west lies the element of fire,
symbolized by the lotus of compassion, which changes reckless passion into
discriminating wisdom. The symbol of the windy north in Marianne’s mandala is
the pitcher of amrita, which converts envy into all-accomplishing action: one
accepts one’s limitations and does what needs to be done in that place at that
time. Finally, at the center is the wheel, in the element of space; it is here
that the ego’s highly selective blindness is transmuted into the wisdom of
all-pervading awareness.

Mantra
: Written, visualized, or
chanted syllables, each with the power to invoke or magnetize some enlightening
quality in the phenomenal world.

Mapa
: Buttered tsampa; a favorite
dish in Tibet.

Momo:
Tibetan dumplings, stuffed
with meat or vegetables.

Mudra
: Hand-signs representing
actions of the enlightened mind.

Nirvana
: Total liberation from
samsara.

Padmasambhava
: Tibet’s
greatest saint, he traveled from India carrying the esoteric teachings of Buddhism
and communicating them in a form that could be embraced by practitioners of
Bon. Thus it is said that he
subdued the wild demons of Tibet and posted them
as guardians of Buddhism, working for the benefit of all life.

Potala:
The winter palace of the
Dalai Lamas, named for the heavenly cloud-palace of Chenrezi.

Puja
: A devotional ceremony.

Sakyamuni:
Siddhartha,
Gautama Buddha. The historical Buddha, or Buddha of the present age. Contrast
with Maitreya, the Buddha of the Future.

Samsara:
The
ever-changing world of phenomena, marked by illusions, ignorance, and mainly
suffering.

Silon:
Prime minister of the
Kashag.

Skandhas:
The five
eternal, irreducible elements from which the universe is created, known as
Form, Sensation, Name, Conformation, and Consciousness. The ego is created
through the interaction of these elements and comes to perceive itself as
“real,” much as we may look at an object composed of subatomic particles
dancing in emptiness and perceive it as “solid.” At death, the skandhas separate,
but such is the ego’s power over the illusory world which it inhabits that it
may cling to matter and draw itself back into samsaric existence.

Stupa:
See
chorten
.

Tantra
: Teachings which instruct
one in the conduct of worldly activities (such as yoga and meditation) that may
facilitate the achievement of enlightenment in the midst of the
phenomenological world.

Tara:
A feminine emanation of
Chenrezi. She manifests in a variety of colors, each having a particular power.

Tsampa:
Roast barley flour, usually
moistened with tea, water, or beer and rolled into balls to be eaten.

Tumo fire:
The mystic
heat which is generated through specialized techniques of visualization. What
begins as a mental image swiftly becomes, with practice, a physical
manifestation. Particularly useful to the hermits who dwelt in cold Himalayan
caves to pursue their meditations.

Vajra:
Literally, “diamond.” A
ritual wand symbolizing the indestructible nature of the enlightened mind.
(“Dorje” is the Tibetan equivalent.)

Vajrapani:
A bodhisattva.
In his wrathful form he is Lord of Energy.

Vajrayana:
The Diamond
Path. The Tantric Buddhism of Tibet.

Wish-Fulfilling Gem:
In Tibetan
iconography, a symbol of the Buddhist faith.

Yidam:
A personal spiritual guide,
usually bestowed on one by a Lama during initiation into one of the paths of
Vajrayana. Yidams are often selected according to the practitioner’s nature,
and represent an ideal, enlightened aspect of one’s mind. A passive individual
might receive a yidam possessing an aggressive nature. “Receive” may be a
misleading concept in this case, as the yidam is called from within, rather
than drawn in from without. In fact, a yidam is not separate from oneself.