Nerd Girl (18 page)

Nonetheless, I glared at my sister. There was a brief, awkward silence.

Ethan, knowing me well enough to read my non-verbal cues, redirected the conversation. “So Ryan,” he started, “how did you and Julia meet? Anna gave me the short version, but I’m sure she exaggerated some details.”

Anna gave Ethan the evil eye. Ryan didn’t bat a lash. By now our server had brought our food and instead of addressing Anna’s “brilliant idea,” we ordered another bottle of wine.

Well played, Ethan.
I was curious to hear this story from Ryan’s point of view.

“Well, I basically hit her with my car.”

This got a reaction out of Dexter, who almost spit out his wine.

I actually guffawed and thought it best I chime in. “It was just a bump. I was walking into the street to pick up a soccer ball from a nearby game. We were on the MS campus.”

“I totally didn’t see her step out into the road. I wasn’t going fast, and it was so sudden, but I apparently bumped her hard enough for her to fall. She left a huge dent in my bumper, though.”

I looked at him and my mouth dropped open, even though I knew he was totally kidding. I pulled a Mia and jabbed him in the side with my elbow.

He feigned pain. “Just kidding!” he said defensively, holding up his hands and laughing.

“He did a hit and run,” I deadpanned. “He’s lucky I didn’t press charges.”

“No I didn’t! She told me she was running late for an interview and basically shoved me away and didn’t want any help.”

“I was fine, really. There was no harm done.”

“Except for your laptop.”

“Yes, except for my laptop,” I agreed.

I noticed he’d put his arm casually around my chair while we told our joint story. Maybe it was the wine getting to me, but I leaned comfortably back into the nook of his arm. I had removed my sweater earlier and his fingertips were lightly brushing my bare shoulder, giving me goosebumps even though it was a warm evening. I glanced at Anna, who was staring pointedly at his fingers lingering lightly on my shoulder and then back to my eyes, like I didn’t notice.

“Anyways, she was in such a hurry, she just took off. We didn’t exchange names or any other information. She just kept babbling about not wanting to be late. She didn’t seem at all distraught about the fact that she had just been hit by a car.”

“And just when I thought I would never see him again …”

“The stars aligned and we bumped into each other at Betty’s,” Ryan put in. For Dexter’s benefit, he added, “It’s a restaurant up on top of the hill.”

We continued to tell the rest of the story, exchanging back and forth commentary like an old couple. It was almost funny how easy our banter was building off the other’s comments. Anna’s eyes kept looking back and forth from Ryan to me as if she was watching a tennis match. She was as aware of this fluid and comfortable exchange as I was. Maybe that’s one of those
twin
things. She seemed to sense how odd this was, considering that Ryan and I barely knew each other. It also didn’t get past me that she had a smug grin on her face.

Why did everything seem so effortless with Ryan? We seemed to feed off of each other’s energy. I remembered how easy it was to talk to him that night at Betty’s, too. It was clear something was happening between us. In the course of twenty-four hours, I could feel my heart changing and shifting, slowly but tentatively opening up again. It was like the sun trying to come out on a cloudy, constantly weather-shifting Seattle day. Could Ryan finally be the one I’ve been waiting for? Between Dexter and Jamie and Anna and Ethan, I had two examples that love
did
exist and that happiness could be found. I was an optimistic person by nature and I could finally feel the sun peeking through.

“That’s awesome. What a great story,” Dexter declared with a wide grin.

“Well, isn’t there more to the story, Julia?” Anna asked innocently. I knew she was fishing for the additional details I hadn’t been able to share with her earlier. “You guys never exchanged contact information that night after Betty’s, did you?”

Ryan jumped in to rescue me and gave me a look that said he had this one covered. “No, we never did. That was one of my bigger regrets.” He looked over at me coyly.

I was befuddled by his candor.

“It was totally unexpected,” he continued, “but we saw each other again yesterday at a work function. I volunteered to help her with some work stuff today. When she found out I had no other plans tonight, she took pity on me and invited me out.”

“Third time’s a charm then, right?” Anna asked cheerfully.

“So what do you do at Megasoft?” Ethan butted in. I looked at Ethan with gratitude and he winked at me, cutting Anna off from asking any further questions.

“I’m in marketing.”

This was the same thing Ryan had initially told me when we first met. He was so humble about it. He left out the part about being the Vice President of Marketing for North America for Megasoft, one of the largest and most successful software companies in the world.

The group discussion switched again and this time it was about my new job. I summarized my whirlwind first week and Ryan was quiet. I couldn’t help feeling a little self-conscious as I described my work, my manager, and my crazy teammates. Did he perceive Catherine’s team the same way? Probably not. How well did he know the people I was talking about? I made a mental note to be more cautious about work-related topics in the future. Not because I couldn’t trust Ryan to keep them confidential, but I felt a little like I was betraying the confidence of my teammates and Catherine in front of a very influential executive that they have no idea that I had any sort of relationship with.

Eventually, our conversation split into two. Ryan and Ethan started talking about the Sounders’ season while Anna, Dexter, and I discussed the wedding. I noticed that Ethan and Ryan seemed to be getting along well. They both had a passion for soccer and Husky football and I had visions of the four of us tailgating and going to football games together. The fact that our SOs got along was always important to Anna and me, especially because it made it easier for us to see each other. We used to discuss how great life would be when we were both married with kids. Anna and I would hang out as usual, our husbands would watch sports in the basement or barbeque outside, and our beautiful and perfect children would not only be cousins, but the best of friends.

And just like that, I was shamelessly letting my mind wander into the realm of Ryan as a potential spouse. Next thing I knew, I’d be practicing writing
Julia McGraw
in my journal. I
did
like the sound of that. I really needed to stop. I was so going to get myself in trouble if I started thinking that stuff already.

As if Anna could read my mind, she waved her hand in my face. “Earth calling Julia.”

I refocused and looked at her.

She chuckled at me and shook her head. “I was asking if you wanted me to pick you up tomorrow to go to the bridal shop.”

“Oh, yes, sure.”

As the dinner party came to an end, Ryan insisted on paying my portion of the check. We gave our hugs and goodbyes and Dexter pecked me on both cheeks, European style.

“Bye, love. I’ll call you when Jamie and I figure out details about our commitment ceremony. Though, at this rate, I’ll have to plan that all myself, too,” he joked.

Anna hugged Ryan a second time and gushed about how glad she was to have met him and how happy she was that he was able to join us tonight.

There was a lot of hugging going on.
I really do love these people.
I couldn’t help contemplating what sort of role Ryan would play in the future with them. A part of me was nervous for any sort of attachments to start between Ethan and Ryan; or Anna, for that matter.

Julia, don’t get ahead of yourself on this one.
I waved a final goodbye to my sister and started walking back to my place with Ryan. Not one block down, I heard my phone chime a text.

Dexter:
Not sure what happened to A, but R seems great. Total HOTTIE too! U go girl! Great seeing u.

Me:
:)
Love u and miss u already!

“Everything okay?” Ryan asked.

“Yeah,” I giggled. “It’s from Dexter. Just said he had fun tonight and missed me already.” I’ll have to send him an email next week to catch up sans Ryan.

Through dinner, each of us had several glasses of wine. I had exceeded my two drink limit and was happily a little drunk, but not yet to the stumbling point. To my pleasant and welcome surprise, Ryan grabbed my hand and held it through our short walk back to my place. His hand felt strong, warm, and comforting. I was all smiles tonight; blissfully happy at this very moment. I felt such a natural chemistry and pull between us. Did he feel it too?

As he walked me to my door, I wasn’t sure whether or not to invite him in. I didn’t want to seem too forward. The thought of making out with him on my sofa or bed was more than a bit tantalizing. We entered the main building lobby and he followed me down the hall to my door.

“Do you want to come in?” I asked shyly.

“No,” he said quietly.

I knew I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t help feeling a little wounded by his rebuff. I think he sensed it too, because he gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.

“I had a really amazing time with you today, Julia. It’s been...eye opening for me. But I think we should take it slow.”

Relief flooded over me. For a moment there, I thought he was declining because he wasn’t sure about his interest in me. Then it begged the question, did wanting to take it slow mean he was interested in seeing me again?

“Okay,” I replied, not revealing any hint of my internal monologue.

The look on his face was familiar and it brought flashbacks of that night at Betty’s in front of my car. I could tell he was battling with something in his brain. If only I could read his mind and help him work through it.

“Goodnight,” he said, leaning over to hug me.

I drank in his scent, his closeness. We both instinctively turned our heads slightly towards one another. I could feel his breath lightly tickling my neck. He smelled so good, a combination of soap and just Ryan. His nearness, his touch, and warmth were intoxicating. We both lingered in the embrace for a moment longer and then I felt the gentle caress of his lips on my neck. My blood instantly started to boil. I turned my face into his and his lips reached for mine. He kissed me gently at first, slowly and softly, like putting your toe tentatively in water to check the temperature. His lips were so soft and warm and he tasted subtly like delicious wine. As his mouth lingered on mine, I opened mine wider to feel his tongue and let him in. I caressed his neck and gripped the back of his head more firmly, kissing him back with more fervor. He returned with his own escalating hunger.

One of his hands moved under the back of my sweater, rubbing my bare upper back and pulling me closer into him. The other one fisted my hair. Our kiss had moved from slow and gentle to full on passion and desire. There was no time, no space, no memory, just his heated, desperate lips on mine. I was completely lost in his kiss and I felt it in every fiber and bone of my body. Damn, he was a good kisser.

He finally pulled away, but only enough so our lips parted; our foreheads remained touching. We were both breathless and panting, trying to gain back our equilibrium. I finally opened my eyes and looked up at him. His eyes were smoky and hooded.
What was that?
I was still gasping for air. The chemistry and attraction between us was palpable.

He mumbled more to himself than to me, “I’m in so much fucking trouble.”

I bit my lip and looked at him with a mischievous smile. I was a little confused by his comment, but didn’t have the coherency to ask him about it.

“Goodnight, Julia,” he almost scowled, his breathing still a little labored. He was as affected by the kiss as I was.

“Goodnight, Ryan.”

Neither of us could seem to say much more.

Then he was gone.

“Oh my God, Julia! You’re totally going to marry him!” Anna exclaimed with absolute certainty.

I arched an eyebrow and gave her a look like I thought she was nuts—because she was. She’d said this about at least two other men in my past, Andrew included, but I decided not to remind her.

“You two just seem so perfect for each other. You guys were totally acting like a couple already.”

I helped zip up the back of her wedding dress, trying my hardest not to play into her hand and gush about Ryan.

“I
really
liked him, Julia. Ethan thought he was super cool, too. Plus, Ethan appreciated the fact that Ryan was closer to his age.” Anna rolled her eyes with her last comment. Ethan was thirty-four and always making self-deprecating old man jokes. It’s not like he was that much older than we were, but I was glad he and Ryan had something in common.

Earlier, I had filled in Anna about yesterday’s events with Ryan, including his job at MS and how I came to discover who he really was. Anna worked as a second grade teacher for the city school district, so she really didn’t get the whole corporate culture or the office romance taboo thing. She didn’t think that his position, relative to my own, was all that important. As long as we weren’t on the same team and I didn’t report to him, she considered him fair game.