Never a Mistress, No Longer a Maid (10 page)

CHAPTER ELEVEN

An hour later and after the coldest bath he’d endured since
returning to England, Ned surveyed his room.  It was clean and had a quite
pleasant view of the woods.  But it, like every other part of the house he’d
seen so far, was sparsely furnished.  The linens were high quality but had
obviously been purchased many years before and were faded with age.  There were
no footmen to bring his water up from the kitchen, so he and Rigg had each
carried two buckets and made do with what they had.

He’d seen no other servants besides the ones he’d already
met.  His daughter – he was still adjusting to that – had a room down the hall,
like her mother.  Ned didn’t even know if there was a nursery, or if there was,
how well it was stocked.  He was sure Jane had been educating Vi better than
any governess could have and he didn’t doubt her dedication as a mother in the
least.  He had a feeling Jane had probably sacrificed a great deal personally
over the years in order to give more to their daughter.   That was all going to
change for the better.

He found Jane in the study, engrossed in a ledger.  He
entered the room and shut the door behind him.

She didn’t look up, but somehow knew it was him.  “Please
leave the door open.  It’s not proper for us to be alone together.”

“Jane, I believe we stopped being proper quite some time
ago.  Besides, I don’t think you want anyone else to hear what I have to say.”

That was certainly true, thought Jane.  There were any
number of things he could say that would best be kept private.  The only
problem was the temptation he presented when no one else was around.

“Will you come out from behind that desk and join me in
front of the fire?”

“No.”  Too many things could happen if she got up from the
desk.  Too many wonderful, sensuous things which were altogether bad for her.

“I’d much rather talk to you from these chairs,” he said.

“I’d much rather stay where I am.”

“Very well.”  He walked around the desk, then stood inches
away, towering over her.  “When can we be married?”

“What?!?” From her seated position, Jane had to crane her
neck upward to see if he was joking or drunk.  The latter would be particularly
alarming considering how much of the day he’d spent on the roof.

“Do you want to wait for the banns to be called or shall I
ride to town to procure a special license?  Would you prefer to be wed in
Marston Vale or allow my elder brother to dictate every moment and marry in
London?  In case you couldn’t tell from the phrasing of my question, I would
prefer a wedding here in the village.”

“Are you daft?” Jane moved away to put some space between
them. 

He closed the distance, like a panther with prey. 

“At the risk of sounding conceited, I could ask you the same
question.  Most women in your position would immediately accept such an offer,
not question the sanity of the man who’d made it.”

“First of all, you didn’t offer anything.  You informed me
we were getting married.  The only choices you offered were how quickly and in
what location.  Second, as a woman ‘in my position,’ as you so charmingly put
it, I’m doing quite fine, thank you.  Third, the last offer you made was to
make me your mistress.  I can’t help but wonder what’s responsible for the
upgrade. Knowing I bore your daughter?  Or that I’m the granddaughter of an
earl and not the innkeeper widow you once thought.”

“None of that is relevant.”

“I think it is.  Would you be asking me, excuse me, ‘telling’
me to marry you if it weren’t for Vi?  Because I don’t recall you asking in the
days you were here before you knew of the connection.”

Damn.  The woman had a point.

“There’s no use in discussing hypotheticals.  I know about
her now and I’m doing what’s right.”

“Thank you, but no.”  She moved to put more distance between
them.  He followed.

“You need my help.  And before you tell me again how good of
a job you’ve done in my absence, I’ll beat you to it.  You’ve done an excellent
job.  An admirable job.  I don’t know of anyone who could’ve done better.”

Jane clutched the folds of her dress.  Anything to keep from
reaching for him.  “Flattery will not help your case.”

“Hush, madam.  You’ve done an exceptionable job, but that
doesn’t mean you couldn’t use additional help, like when the roof leaks.”

“But now the roof won’t leak because you did such a fine job
fixing it, which I sincerely thank you for.  Now, if you’ll excuse me…”

She was on her way to the door, when Ned grabbed her.  He
needed a way to keep her in the room and to stop her from talking just for a
moment, so he could try to make up for his pitiful, botched proposal.  So he
drew her to him and kissed her.  Not a polite kiss, or even a slightly probing,
exploratory kiss.  This one laid claim to her lips and body.

As his tongue explored her mouth, his hands reacquainted
themselves with her body.  As one hand pulled the round globes of her bottom
toward him, his other hand cupped her breast.    The kiss quickly escalated.  His
rock hard cock was pressed to her stomach.  There was no hiding his need from
her.  He didn’t want to hide it from her.  All he could think about was being
inside her again.  To feel her wet heat.  To see her naked again.  To press
against her without any barriers. 

When he’d said this house was a home, he’d been right in
many ways.

*                    *                    *               

Despite her better judgment, Jane completely lost herself in
his kiss.  From the moment his lips touched hers, all she could think about was
getting closer to him.  Picking up where they’d left off in Belgium.  Reigniting
the passion in her life that she’d barely had the chance to experience.  And if
she married him, she could have this all the time.

If she married him.  What was she thinking?  He didn’t want
to marry her.  He’d asked – or, rather, told her they’d be married – only
because he’d felt he had to.  An obligation similar to the one he’d fulfilled
in his service to king and country.  If he married her because he felt obliged
to do so, it was only a matter of time before he’d regret it, then move on to
another woman like so many of his peers did within their marriages.  It was one
thing for Jane to be alone.  It was quite another to be alone within a
marriage.  She knew she’d be miserable.

She pulled back from him a few inches.

“Ned, stop,” she said.  Then she became aware of a breeze at
her back.  “Did you undo my laces?”

He mumbled something against her neck that might have been
an admission of guilt.  She placed both her hands on his chest and pushed. 
After a moment’s hesitation, he stepped back.  Not because she’d been able to
push him away, but because he’d allowed it.

“Re-lace me this instant,” she said as she gave him her
back.  That proved to be a mistake because he started kissing the nape of her
neck.  “I’m serious.  I’m sure Vi is searching the house for you.  It’s only a
matter of time before she finds us here.”

He reluctantly began lacing her dress very slowly, taking
every opportunity to brush his fingers against her bare skin.  “Maybe we should
tell Vi the truth about me and let her decide.”

“You cannot tell her about you.”

“She’s going to learn at some point.  I won’t allow my
daughter to grow up without knowing me.”

“That’s a question for another day.  Until we decide how to
proceed, I ask you to please keep the situation between ourselves.”

Ned finished with the laces, then turned her to him.  All
trace of humor was gone from his face.  “I’ll defer to you on this.  For now. 
But I will not be put off indefinitely.  You will marry me.  And in the
meantime, you’ll allow me to pay all expenses and any more debts that may be
outstanding.”

“Why do you think we have more debts?”

“I saw the look on your face as you worked on the ledger. 
It wasn’t the look of someone whose biggest financial concern was where to go
on holiday.  Now, unless my ears deceive me, I hear our daughter running
through the entryway toward this very room.  Do I look presentable?”

Jane nodded, thinking he looked a good deal more than presentable
and wanting to run her fingers through his hair to muss it.  But there was no
time because the door flew open and Vi ran inside.

“Mrs. Heldt wanted me to tell you dinner is served.  Will
you sit beside me Ned?  Will you?”

“There’s nothing I’d love more, poppet.”

Grabbing his hand, Vi pulled him into the dining room.  Her
enthusiasm helped lighten the mood of both her parents.

“Did you know Ned climbs trees, Mama?” asked Vi as she
settled into her chair.

“No, I’m afraid that particular skill of his has not come up
in conversation,” said Jane.

Rigg entered the room, carrying the first course.  As he
began to serve, Ned looked at him inquiringly.

“Heldt’s rheumatism is acting up.  I told him I’d serve
while he rested.”

That might be true, but Ned knew Rigg must also be dying of
curiosity. 

Jane began to rise.  “I’ll tend to Heldt.”

“If you’ll excuse me, Miss Wetherby,” said Rigg, “Mrs. Heldt
told me to let you know she’s already applied the usual poultice.  She suggests
you finish your dinner and not give the situation a further thought.”

Jane looked uncertain as to what to do.

“She was quite adamant, Miss.”

Jane sat down again. 

“Perhaps I can sing to Mr. Heldt later, Mama.”

“I’m sure he’d like that very much,” she said, as she
squeezed her daughter’s hand.

“I’d like to hear you sing,” said Ned.

“Mama and I sing together,” said Vi, between bites of a
particularly good shepherd’s pie.  “We used to do it at the pianoforte, but we
had to sell it.  I hope we get another one soon, then we can play and sing for
you on that.”

Ned mentally added a pianoforte to the list of items to
purchase.  Provided he could get Jane to unbend enough to accept it.

“Do you have brothers and sisters?” Vi asked him.

“Three brothers and one sister.”

Vi’s eyes lit up.  “I’d love to have three brothers and a
sister.  All I have is Titania.”

“Yes, but at least Titania catches mice.  I’m afraid none of
my brothers can catch mice, although I’m sure my sister is clever enough to do
so.”

“What are their names?”

“The mice my sister catches?  I’m not sure she ever named
them.”

Vi broke out in giggles and Ned felt punched in the gut.  He
wasn’t sure he’d ever heard a sweeter sound.

“My elder brother is named William, but we call him Liam.”

“Like I’m Violet but everyone calls me Vi.”

“Exactly.  Then I have two younger brothers, Arthur and Hal. 
And my sister is the youngest.  Her name is Elizabeth, but we call her Lizzie.”

“Did you play together all the time when you were children?”

Ned heard the wistful tone in the little girl’s voice.  “We
did play.  But we also had our studies.  And we had to work around the house.”

“You mean you didn’t have servants?”

A snort-like sound came from the direction of Rigg who’d
been, up until that point, the epitome of an excellent butler.  Ned ignored the
insufferable man.

“We did have servants, but our mother and father believed it
was important for us to have responsibilities.”

“I have responsibilities, too.  I help clear the table, I make
my bed and sometimes I work in the garden.  Did you do that?”

Another snort from the direction of Rigg. 

“Most of our responsibilities concerned learning the family
history, being able to identify the trees and plants on the estate and getting
enough exercise during the day.  I think that last responsibility was simply a
means of tiring us out.”

“Did you have any toys?”

Ned thought it probably wasn’t quite the thing to explain
that their nursery, which ran from one end of the house to the other, was
better stocked than any toy store in London. 

“Vi, I think we’ve asked Ned enough questions for tonight,”
said her mother.  “You can save a few for tomorrow.”

“I’m glad you’re spending the night,” said Vi.  “Storms can
be scary.”

“I’m glad I’m spending the night, too,” said Ned.  “And you
don’t have to worry about storms.  You don’t have to be scared about anything ever
again.”

Not if he had any say in the matter.

After dinner, Jane and Vi sang a series of duets for an
enchanted Ned.  Then Vi asked Ned to tell her stories of his travels.  It took
a great deal of fast thinking and a certain talent for embellishment to weed
out those parts of his adventures not suitable for young ears – be they violent
or romantic in nature – and to replace them with happy endings that a
six-year-old girl might enjoy.  And there was a certain contentment he felt as
the three of them talked near the fire while the storm raged outside.

But it had been a long day, and the excitement eventually
took its toll on Vi.

“It’s time for bed,” said Jane to her very tired daughter
who was trying desperately to stay awake.

“But Mama, I want to sing with you some more.”

“We can sing again tomorrow, sweeting.  It’s time for sleep.”

As Jane herded the little girl toward the stairs, Ned
followed. 

“I’m too tired to climb the stairs,” said Vi.

“I’ll carry you,” said Jane as she bent to pick her up.

Vi turned her face shyly into her mother’s stomach.  “Can
Ned carry me?”

He was caught off guard by the request.  He wasn’t even sure
how to carry a little girl.  Over the shoulder seemed extreme.   But he didn’t
think it would be the way he’d seen others holding infants either.  Before he could
overthink it, he was pulled down as Vi put her arms around his neck and
balanced herself on his hip.