Authors: Julie Blair
“Come on, baby,” Jamie whispered against an erect nipple. “Let it go.” Clarissa did, screaming and groaning as she came against Jamie’s leg. Jamie’s clit was pulsing so hard she knew she wouldn’t last, and when Clarissa pushed her hand inside Jamie’s jeans and entered her, Jamie exploded. They stared at each other with glazed eyes before bursting into laughter.
“That went well.” Clarissa nibbled across Jamie’s collarbone before running her tongue along Jamie’s lower lip. They spent a long time kissing, deep probing mixed with gentle licks and small bites, just the mix of insistence and softness Jamie loved. The rest of the afternoon and well into the evening entailed one of the most delicious sessions of sex Jamie could remember, coming so many times she finally had to admit that she couldn’t come one more time, although Clarissa could, and did.
Jamie shivered, from either the chilled air, now heavy with fog, or from the memory of how free and easy her life had been. She’d studied hard and played hard, but now she just worked hard. Sinking into the hard chair, she picked up the glass and took a long sip. She let the whiskey warm her as she searched for the source of the ache settling in her stomach. Was it sadness for a youth that had ended too soon? She hadn’t wanted to build the new clinic. It had been her father’s dream, and unbeknownst to her, he’d bought the property the day she graduated from chiropractic school. She’d argued with him for weeks—she wanted more time to get used to being a doctor, she wasn’t ready to take on the financial burden, the clinic was too big—but the deed was done and he’d brushed aside her concerns with “It’s time to grow up.”
She fell into another memory as Melissa’s voice sang the opening of “Ain’t It Heavy” from her
Never Enough
album. Jamie knew exactly where she’d been the first time she heard that album. She’d wanted to market to the gay community, to build a practice that felt more like “hers” and less like an offshoot of her father’s. They argued, and she accused him of pretending to accept her lifestyle but only if he didn’t have to see it. She remembered storming out of the office and racing home in her Z, the new album blasting from the cassette player. She’d persuaded Penni to drive up to the city with her.
They’d hooked up with a couple of women they met in line at a taqueria, and Penni had teased her when she draped her arm across the curvy blonde with the Southern accent. They’d gone back to their apartment, surprised to find their new friends were big Melissa fans. Over beers they traded Melissa facts and fantasies and ended the night dancing around the small living room.
Memories surged around her like the ocean as she sat in the dark and tried to chart the course from her college years playing softball and goofing around with Penni to the owner of a business in trouble. Graduation from chiropractic school. State boards. New doctor in his practice. Partner in the clinic. That one weekend at the music festival stood out like a shooting star amidst all of it.
Jamie woke to a dark room and, still half asleep, reached for the warm body she’d been dreaming about. She jerked upright, heart racing. Alone. Sadness spread through her like a gray fog, and she couldn’t stop the tears that turned to angry sobs for everything she’d left behind—freedom to make choices, softball, fun. And everything that had been taken from her—her father’s business expertise, her mom’s wisdom and support. She hugged a pillow and cried herself into a restless sleep.
When she woke again she saw the ocean through the sliding door, a dull gray under the overcast sky. Her phone rang as she pulled the covers up and rolled over to go back to sleep.
“Are you on your way back? I have my brunch at eleven.”
“Can’t one of your friends—”
“No. I want to go shopping afterward.”
Jamie closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “I’ll be there in time.”
“Thank you.”
Jamie ended the call and pulled the covers over her head. Why was everything her responsibility?
*
The problem with running away was having to go back. Maybe she should run away for good. She pressed harder on the accelerator as if forcing herself to keep going against the gravity of not wanting to. She had responsibilities and running away wasn’t an option.
She rubbed the back of her neck. What was she going to do about Carla? She almost wished she didn’t know that Carla remembered her. It complicated things just when it was apparent Carla could help with the embezzlement investigation.
When she walked into the kitchen, Sheryl was staring at the Gaggia, the grinder and a bag of coffee next to it.
“Hi, babe.” Jamie kissed her cheek.
I don’t like that perfume.
“I figured out how to make the espresso, but how do you use the steamer?”
“This symbol.” Jamie rotated the knob.
“Can you do it?”
“Sure. About yesterday—”
“It’s no big deal. You got home in time.”
Jamie held the container under the frothing wand as the milk sputtered into peaks of foam.
“I’ll just be a few hours, and then you can go take care of the Lexus.” Sheryl took a sip of the coffee Jamie handed her. “Thanks.” She draped her arm over Jamie’s shoulder and kissed her. It was over too quick. “I missed you last night.”
Jamie tucked her hands inside her new sweatshirt as she followed her to their bedroom. “I was thinking,” she said, watching Sheryl spread her makeup containers over the counter. “What if we just went for a week? To Hawaii.”
“I’ll have to see.” Sheryl opened a tube and rubbed beige foundation over her face.
“This is important to me, babe. We need a vacation, some time alone together.”
“We’re fine.” Sheryl brushed a rosy powder across her cheeks with a black-handled brush.
“It doesn’t feel that way to me.” Jamie stared at the towels tossed on the floor.
“You get this way every time you’re around Penni.” Sheryl pawed through several containers, opened one, and brushed a dark-brown eye shadow onto her eyelids.
“Do I?” She could rattle off the moves that led to a pretty face. “They’ve been together longer than we have and they still seem—”
“Joined at the hip?” Sheryl looked up, her expression in the mirror mocking.
New lovers and best friends, Jamie was going to say. Now came the mascara.
“I know you idolize their relationship, but really, Jamie, don’t you find it silly they’re clinging to some childish infatuation? I like that we’ve gotten past all that. At our age we should be focusing on careers that will get us where we want to be.” Sheryl opened a lipstick.
Need surged through Jamie, and she turned Sheryl her toward her. “Before you put that on, how about a real kiss?”
Where was the spark she used to see in Sheryl’s eyes just before she kissed her? Jamie wasn’t sure where to put her hands. A total stranger had stepped eagerly into her arms last night. She felt the tension in Sheryl’s shoulders and heard the unspoken words—don’t wrinkle my blouse, don’t muss my hair, don’t smudge my makeup.
She entwined their fingers. “I love you,” she whispered as she tried to show Sheryl how much.
*
Jamie was hoisting herself out of the pool when her phone rang. “What’s up, Don?”
“I hate to bother you, Jamie, but Charlotte Burns threw her back out again. I went in last night, but she says it’s worse today and insists you’re the only one who can get it right.”
Jamie wanted to throttle the woman who thought her VP job title gave her the right to be demanding. She was overweight, didn’t exercise, sat too many hours at a desk, and then wondered why her lower back was a disaster.
“I didn’t guarantee her I could get ahold of you, but I thought you should make that decision.”
“Give me her number.” Jamie gouged the number onto a sticky note.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. And Don…Charlotte’s difficult even for me.”
“Thanks.”
Jamie stared at her phone for a long time before making the call. Her reprieve from responsibility was over. She rubbed the knots in her neck as another text came through from Penni. “Forgiven yet?”
She sighed and texted back, “Yes. Gonna cost you. Will call later.” Half her life. Nothing could break a friendship like that.
Jamie’s SUV was the only car in the parking lot when Carla pulled in. She marched to the back door before her resolve failed. In a weekend of roller-coaster emotions, she kept coming back to one truth—she refused to walk out on Jamie again. She intended to fight for her job.
A burst of longing shot through her as she clasped the doorknob to Jamie’s office. Her friends would be shocked if they knew that behind her reputed emotional calm and level-headedness was a woman who wanted to storm into her boss’s office, pull her into her arms, and kiss her senseless. When Jamie didn’t answer the knock she peeked in.
Jamie was standing in front of the window, her back to Carla, the phone against her ear, and a sheet of paper crumpled in her fist. “You can’t just cut off my preferred-provider status.” The tone was part anger, part fear. “I never got the first notice. I know I can appeal, but I was only recently made aware of the problem. I’m trying to find out what…Fine, you’ll be hearing from my attorney.” Jamie’s arms fell to her sides. She stood rigidly still.
“I couldn’t help but overhear. How can I help?” When Jamie turned around, her eyes were flat with anger. Carla ached to rub away the frown that hooded them.
Jamie dropped heavily into her chair. “I can take care—”
“I’m your office manager.”
Jamie smoothed out the paper and slid it across the desk.
Carla read it. “What’s this about a previous notice?”
“Must have come when Marjorie was still here. If they revoke my preferred-provider status—”
“Patients will have a higher co-pay,” Carla said. “It’s one of the smaller companies we bill. Not as many patients will be affected.”
“I’ll have to explain why.” Defeat replaced the anger in Jamie’s voice.
“Let me see what I can do.”
“I should call my attorney.” Jamie’s gaze went to the pictures on the corner of her desk.
“Give me a day.” Carla closed the door behind her and marched to her office. If she ever got her hands on Marjorie she’d strangle that woman. She tossed her purse and sweater on the desk and picked up the phone. She wasn’t leaving this office until she fixed this problem.
*
Jamie leaned back in her chair and rubbed the back of her neck. An army of hands couldn’t loosen the knots. Carla evidently wasn’t going to quit and she hadn’t brought up Saturday. Good. Maybe they could just pretend it hadn’t happened.
Now on to the next problem. She called Sheryl. “The dealership says it’s an electrical problem. They’ll have it fixed tomorrow. If you can get someone to drive you over there, they’ll give you a loaner.”
“Why can’t you take me?”
“I’m dealing with a serious problem. I got a letter from an insurance company threatening to revoke my preferred-provider status.” She wanted Sheryl to ask if she could do anything to help. Support went both ways. “It’s a big deal, Sheryl.”
“Well, I hope it works out.” Sheryl said something to someone about arranging a parent conference. “Can you pick me up after work and take me? I don’t have a meeting tonight. Maybe we could get dinner.”
“I won’t be done till after six.”
“But—”
“I gotta go. See you tonight.” As Jamie got out of the chair, her elbow bumped a stack of patient files and they toppled to the floor. What was she thinking? She hadn’t gone through files since Friday. She needed to deal with her business problems. Hadn’t the letter made that clear? She forced back anger as she restacked the files. Gripping the doorknob she took deep breaths until everything faded but the responsibility in front of her. She was a chiropractor. She took care of people.
*
Carla hung up the phone and jumped from her chair, anxious to share the good news with Jamie as soon as she finished with her last patient. Was it her imagination or had Jamie been avoiding her all day? She hadn’t been fired, but Jamie hadn’t said anything about Saturday. Should she bring it up?
Jamie’s voice captured her attention as she walked her patient to the front. Just her voice… Carla sighed as she endured another rebellion from her body.
Jamie looked tired, but this morning’s tightness was gone from her face as she set the file on the front counter. “I’ll see you next month, Renee. Thanks for referring the two new patients.”
“I’m happy to refer people, Jamie, because I know you’ll take care of them. I’m glad to see your office in such good hands,” she said to Carla. “I knew you two would be a good fit.”
Jamie’s cheeks reddened and she wouldn’t meet Carla’s eyes. She disappeared into Carla’s office.
“How would you like some good news?” Carla asked after locking the front door behind Renee.
“It would make my day.” Jamie looked up from pulling files and rubbed the back of her neck. “Maybe my month.”
“I got the insurance company to postpone further action against you for thirty days. By then we should have it sorted out.”
“How did you manage that?” Jamie looked confused.
“A little Southern charm,” Carla said, adding a thick accent. She gulped when Jamie’s eyes sparked. “A little letting them think I was your attorney and we were serious about legal action.”
“You impersonated my attorney?” The confusion changed to a look of surprise.
Carla shrugged. “I didn’t discourage the assumption.”
“I don’t know what to say, Carla.”
“It was my pleasure.” Carla’s throat tightened with everything she couldn’t say.
“About Saturday,” Jamie said, shifting her weight. “We should probably talk about it. Get it out in the open…” She cleared her throat.
“I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.” Carla looked away from Jamie. She couldn’t say this next part if she had to look at everything she wanted and couldn’t have. “I meant I want a second chance at a friendship with you.” Carla blinked back tears and set a smile on her face. Jamie’s expression changed but she couldn’t read it. Relief?
“Um, that sounds good…friendship. I’m sorry I left so abruptly…before you could explain. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Jamie gathered the files and squeezed past Carla in the doorway. Their eyes met for an instant and the gratitude in them was unmistakable.