Night Heat (18 page)

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Authors: Brenda Jackson

BOOK: Night Heat
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Leah continued to read the card, over and over. Why was Reese Singleton so stubborn? Didn't he
understand what she'd told him earlier that day? Didn't he get the picture; she was incapable of allowing another man, even him, ever to touch her?

She almost jumped when the doorbell rang again. She went to the door and glanced out of the peephole and her heart began pounding. It was Reese.

A part of her wanted to ignore him, but she knew Reese refused to be ignored. Besides, he evidently hadn't comprehended what she'd been trying to tell him earlier. Maybe if she'd had the help of counselors or a support group earlier than she had, she would be a lot stronger now. But she hadn't. Instead of opening up and talking about it, she had tried to go through life without dealing with the rape, and in so doing she had erected this physical and emotional shield against all men.

Although she already knew the answer, she asked, “Who is it?”

“It's Reese, Leah. Please open the door so we can talk.”

Telling him they had nothing to discuss would be useless. It was best to let him in so they could talk and then that would be the end of things.

She slowly opened the door and took a step back and Reese entered, closing the door behind him. She'd seen the look in his eyes the moment he'd gazed at her. The pity she'd expected wasn't there, but what she saw was what she remembered so many
other times—desire. The thought that he still found her desirable, even after knowing about what Neil had done, was both flattering and frustrating.

“Why did you come, Reese?”

“Did you think I would stay away?”

No, she really hadn't thought that since he'd always gone after what he wanted. But she just couldn't understand why and how he could still love her after all these years. Especially now.

As if he'd read her thoughts he smiled and said, “Hey, don't even wonder about it, Leah. You knew you had my heart from the first.”

She couldn't help but release a humorless laugh. “It was either me or Kristi Alford, and you deserved better.”

He chuckled. “Yes, and you were definitely it. I have no regrets.”

Neither had she. Still, all the good times they'd shared in the past could not wipe out everything that had happened.

“Leah, I—”

When he reached out to touch her arm, automatically she pulled back and fear jumped into her eyes as her entire body went rigid against his touch. She saw the surprise in his gaze and released a frustrated sigh. “I told you I get filled with revulsion at the thought of any man touching me, no matter how innocent. I think it will be better if you leave now.”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “I'm not leaving and I'm not going to let you put distance between us. I understand the barriers you've put up, but I won't let it stop me from proving something.”

“Proving what?”

“That to you I'm not a regular guy, Leah. I'm the man you loved and by your own admission, the man you still love. Somehow I'm going to remind you of that and break through those walls you've erected. I'm going to be the one man who'll make you want to be touched again.”

She hugged her arms to her breasts and glared at him. “You're pretty sure of yourself, aren't you?”

He smiled. “Yes, and I'm pretty sure of you. You could never resist me when I laid things on thick.”

No, she couldn't, but things weren't the same anymore. “But that was then.”

“And it could be now if you let it. I want us to get back together. I want to marry you, give you babies we'll both love, and I want to be there for you until the day I die.”

The sincerity in his words touched her and she couldn't help the tears that formed in her eyes. Whether he knew it or not, he was offering her a chance to reclaim her dream. But still…

“It won't work, Reese,” she said quietly, again trying to make him see reason.

“How do you know if you won't give it a chance? Give us a chance. We can take things slow, start off by going out to eat, to the movies, take walks…and I promise to keep my hands to myself. In fact I will keep my hands to myself until you say you're ready for something more.”

She lifted a brow. “No kisses?” She remembered how much they'd liked to kiss.

He smiled softly. “And as much as it will probably drive me crazy, no kisses.”

They stared at each other for a long moment and Leah thought about his words, his offer. She met his gaze, studied the expression on his face, looked into the depth of his eyes. “Why do you want to do this? There are other women in town who'd jump at the chance to—”

“You're the one I want, Leah. You're the only one I've ever wanted. You spoiled me for anyone else.” He chuckled quietly. “I didn't know just how messed up I was until you left. I haven't been able to get involved with anyone else and it's been a long time.”

For him it was a long time, since she knew just how passionate he was. “Why?” she asked.

“Because I couldn't imagine making love to anyone but you.”

Leah wondered if he knew what that admission meant to her. But then, if he was putting all his hopes
in her, he still might not be making love to anyone. “Reese, I—”

“No. Just say we can make a go of things again, Leah. We'll take thing slow but we'll still make a go. Although we enjoyed the time we were together, for us it was never just about sex anyway. Remember?”

Yes, she did remember. The sex had been good, but they had shared a special friendship, as well. “And you're sure you want to do this?” she asked, needing the reassurance.

“Yes, I'm sure. Let's start off tomorrow. Early. Invite me to breakfast. I miss your pancakes.”

She couldn't help the tiny smile that touched her lips. And with the memory she recalled a time when she had prepared pancakes at his place one morning, and how they'd got sidetracked and ended up with more batter over them than in the skillet. Of course they'd had to shower together and she remembered what had happened after that….

Leah blinked. That memory had been totally unexpected. It was the first time she'd been able to recall a man touching her body and not get sick at the thought. And on that particular day Reese had touched her all over.

“So are you going to feed me pancakes in the morning?”

His question reclaimed her thoughts. “Yes, I think I can manage that.”

“Good. Well, I'll leave so you can go on to bed and get your rest. See you in the morning, Leah.”

After Reese left, Leah felt an inner peace for the first time in a long while.

Chapter 15

J
ocelyn gazed down into her coffee before taking a sip and smiled. It didn't seem possible but two weeks had passed since that night she and Bas had spent together and now they were definitely an item. They continued to do a lot of things together. Fun things.

During the day they went their separate ways with him working in the office the majority of the time and with her on the job site. Then, in the afternoons while he was at the gym, she used that time to visit with Leah, at least it had started out that way. But now Reese was dominating a lot of her sister's time and although she knew the two were taking things
slowly, just the thought that Leah was spending time with a man, especially the man Leah loved, was gratifying.

Then at night Jocelyn and Bas would meet up somewhere in town, usually at some restaurant or another and enjoy a delicious meal. And since Ms. Sadie had taken Jocelyn into her confidence about Bas's health issues, she made doubly sure whatever he put in his mouth was good for him.

When night came they stayed over either at her place or his. All she had to do was close her eyes to recall any one time his hard male body had entered hers, taking her breath away, preparing her for the orgasm that he could so effortlessly give her, several times over.

At first it was awkward for her, letting a man dominate so much of her time, but pretty soon she got used to him being around. He was considerate, thoughtful and understanding and seemed to know just when she needed her space. He would give it to her, but not for long. It was as if he wanted her to know that what they were sharing was something he intended to make last until the end.

The end.

She knew they were working against a clock and soon he would be leaving to return to Charlotte. She didn't want to think about how her life would be when he left. But she had to be realistic enough to
know what they were sharing wasn't forever. He had his life and she had hers. He belonged to the Steele Corporation and she belonged to Mason Construction. Her life was here and his was there. There was no middle ground.

“You're quiet this morning.”

Jocelyn glanced up and met Leah's curious stare. “I was just thinking.”

“About Bas?” Leah asked, leaning back against the kitchen counter.

Jocelyn opened her mouth to reply, then stopped. She looked closely at her sister. Growing up they had never shared confidences like some sisters who had close relationships. Maybe it was time they did. “Yes, I was thinking about Bas.”

“The two of you have been spending a lot of time together.”

Jocelyn lifted a brow. “And how do you know that?”

Leah laughed as she poured a cup of coffee. “Hey, give me a break. I wasn't born yesterday. You aren't spending the night here anymore and I doubt you're spending a lot of time at your home in your own bed, so what am I to think?”

After taking a sip of coffee she added, “And don't forget when Reese first became my boyfriend you hadn't even started showing any interest in guys. You much preferred playing the part of the builder and holding on to your virginity.”

Jocelyn leaned back in her chair. “Yeah, well, I wish I had held on longer so that Bas could have been my first. I guess in a way he was.”

“Yeah, I'm glad Reese was my first as well,” Leah said quietly, as she came to the table to sit down.

Jocelyn waited a moment before asking, “And how are things going with you and Reese? I can't help noticing the two of you are spending more and more time together.”

Jocelyn watched a tiny smile touch the corners of Leah's lips when she said, “That man is so stubborn.” A frown then replaced the smile. “If it was left up to me, we wouldn't be seeing each other at all. It's so unfair to him.”

“In what way?”

“Reese is everything a woman could want in a man, and I of all people should know. He's handsome, kind, considerate and understanding. He should be dating someone who can give him the things he needs, instead of someone like me, a woman who can't even think about letting him touch me.”

Leah's finger caressed the handle of her cup before she continued. “We've been spending time together for a couple of weeks now and I still can't let him kiss me, although I know he wants to. And he's keeping his word by not asking. He gets here at seven every morning to share breakfast with me and
before he leaves I know he's hoping that I'll open up, be responsive and let him, but I can't.”

Jocelyn took another sip of her coffee and then said, “At some point you're going to have to try and put behind you that one bad time with Neil and remember all those other great times with Reese.” Jocelyn's lips quirked and she added, “I remembered some of your dreams and how you would moan in your sleep. Hell, it made me wish I could have been a fly on the wall during one of those times the two of you were together.”

Her comment had Leah laughing and Jocelyn felt good hearing it. When Leah's amusement finally cleared she leaned back in her chair. “Trust me, a fly would have died from too much heat. Reese was all that and then some.” A sad smile then touched her lips. “God, I'd love to share some of those times with him again.”

“And you can, Leah. Reese is making it possible for you to do that. All you have to do is reach out to him. Don't let what Neil did destroy the most precious thing that mattered to you—your love for Reese Singleton.”

A few moments later Jocelyn said, “You know, I use to envy what you had with Reese.”

Leah's brows lifted. “You did?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because I knew the two of you were in love, all into each other, and I wasn't there yet with anyone. In fact, I thought the guys who tried talking to me were annoying. I was a daddy's girl who wanted to build things just like he did. I didn't have time for relationships. But that didn't mean I wouldn't occasionally wonder how things could be between a man and woman.”

Leah gave her a wry smile. “And I'm sure with Bas you're making up for anything you missed out on.”

Jocelyn laughed, thinking of all the things she and Bas had done over the past few weeks; some were outright scandalous, but he had assured her whatever a couple agreed to do in the bedroom was their business. “Yes, you can say that, but what I'm sharing with him isn't forever.”

“It can be if you want it. I've seen the two of you together. I think he's quite taken with you. Even Reese mentioned that he was.”

Jocelyn shook her head. “Bas is taken with the moment just like I am. We're mature enough to know that one day he's going to pack up and return to that life he has in Charlotte. And I have a lot to do here. This is where I belong, here in Newton Grove, keeping Dad's dream alive.”

“And what about your dream? What about love?” Leah asked quietly.

Jocelyn shrugged. “I don't have any dreams and I have no desire to fall in love. I live for the moment. That way you don't worry about what happens when things don't turn out the way you want. And as far as love is concerned, maybe the bug will hit me one day but I'm not in a hurry. What Bas and I are sharing is for today. I'm not planning on any tomorrows.”

“And what if he is?”

Jocelyn chuckled. “Trust me, he's not. Bas likes the way things are just as I do.”

Leah gazed at her sister a moment before saying, “I think it's all a smoke screen for you, Jocelyn. You do have dreams and you want to fall in love but you're afraid to.”

“That's not true.”

“I think it is. You missed Mom as much as I did but instead of withdrawing like I did, you turned your attention to Dad and began clinging to him. And then we had Aunt Susan. Now that both Dad and Aunt Susan are gone, you don't want to risk falling in love for fear of eventually losing that person, as well.”

Jocelyn stared at her sister for a moment, and then shook her head. She had thought the same thing once and had dismissed the thought entirely from her mind, refusing to find a reason for her lack of interest in falling in love over the years. “I'm not afraid of falling in love or having dreams. I just have more to do with my time than indulging in either.”

Leah nodded, and Jocelyn wasn't sure her sister believed what she'd said or not.

 

Later that night Jocelyn stood at the window staring out. It was dark and cold and according to the news report a little snow might be coming their way. She wouldn't mind the snow, but bad weather wasn't good for a construction company. At least Marcella's house was finished and they had done the closing that day. To everyone's surprise it had gone off without a hitch.

“So this is where you went off to,” Bas said, coming behind her and placing a hand around her waist, pulling her back against him. Her turned her into his arms and placed a kiss on her lips. “I missed you.”

Jocelyn chuckled. “You didn't even notice me gone, you were so busy painting.”

He took her face into his hands. “Trust me I noticed you were gone, but I am enjoying that paint-by-number set. I'm glad you talked me into getting it.”

She reached up and slid her arms around his neck. “Umm, paint by numbers today and who knows, you might be asking to use my coloring books tomorrow.”

“Not hardly.”

She threw her head back and laughed. She and Bas had been having honest-to-goodness fun and she didn't want it to end, but she knew that one day it would. She pushed the thought away, not wanting
to dwell on it. “You want to go down in the basement and play a game of pinball?” she asked.

“No, I want you to come back to bed,” he whispered huskily against her ear.

Moments later, in bed, Jocelyn wondered how often a woman could come apart in a man's arms. How often could she get filled with so much intense pleasure? The thought of not being able to share this with Bas almost frightened her.

But then Bas leaned over and kissed her, and once again her mind went blank and she let herself drown in the emotions he was making her feel. And when he slid his body over hers, entered her with one long, penetrating sweep, she became totally aware of the size of him as well as his strength.

“That's it. Move with me, baby,” he whispered as he began thrusting in and out of her. She moved her hips, clutched him with her thighs, locked him in with her legs and clenched him with her inner muscles, pulling everything she could out of him.

“You're getting it all,” he said huskily. The dark sensuality of his voice made her clench him tighter. “Payback.”

And the way he paid her back had her moaning out loud. His hands cradled her hips, he pushed deeper inside her, angling her center so he could hit a spot that built pressure near her womb, causing flames to flare to all parts of her loins.

“Bas!”

“Get ready, cause here I come,” he whispered hoarsely.

And he came.

His body jerked, bucked, spilled into her, filling her with the essence of him. He threw his head back, breathed in tight before screaming her name. And Jocelyn knew this moment would be engraved in her memory forever.

 

The next morning Jocelyn was almost too tired and weak to get out of bed, so she decided to stay put just for a little while, and cuddle close to the masculine body that was spooning her naked backside.

She let out a shuddering breath when she thought of last night and all the other nights they had shared.

“You're awake?”

She smiled, wondering if he was asking her that for a particular reason. She turned over and met his drowsy gaze. “Depends on why you want to know.”

He wrapped his arms tighter around her. “I need to tell you something.”

He sounded serious and she wondered if he was going to tell her that he was leaving. Pretty soon his six weeks would be over and although he claimed he would hang around for at least three months, he really didn't have to. Was he needed back in Charlotte?

“What do you want to tell me?”

“First I need to get my good-morning kiss,” he said, leaning over and capturing her lips with his, drinking the essence of her mouth.

When he released her lips, she smiled and said, “Keep that up and we'll never get any talking in.”

He slowly pulled back and met her gaze. He reached out and traced his finger along her chin. “I feel things with you that I've never felt before with anyone, Jocelyn, and that can only mean one thing.”

She lifted a brow. “What?”

“I love you.”

His words, spoken simply, made her think she hadn't heard him right. But then all she had to do was stare into the clarity of his eyes and see both seriousness and sincerity in their dark depths. She felt flooded by emotions she wasn't ready for, and had to swallow a lump that suddenly formed in her throat. “No,” she whispered softly. “You can't love me.”

Bas reached out and touched his fingertips to her lips. “Yes, I can and you won't believe just how much I do. I want to marry you and—”

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