Nina's Dom (5 page)

Nic
considered how to explain his relationship with Luella. He didn't want to be
disrespectful to his late wife. He'd loved Luella and had been totally happy
with what they shared. However he didn’t want that now.

"Lue
and I lived as Master and slave," he said again. He didn't miss the way
the color ebbed from her face or the way she stiffened once more.
 
Not
for her? That's a relief.
"It was all Lue wanted, to do as I desired
and when. She relied on me for everything.
From what panties
to wear—or not—to where to go to get the shopping and how.
What and when
I wanted to eat. She bowed to my every whim and demand. It worked for us. Lue
didn't want to make decisions. It was her option and one I was happy with.
Okay, I can see you don't agree, but it was our lifestyle choice. She was my
wife, my sub, my slave, and my life."

He
picked up his water again and opened the lid. Nic hadn't reckoned on the
memories flooding back and making him well up. He blocked the pictures that sped
through his mind, and concentrated on Nina. Her lashes were damp, and she made
a noise somewhere between a sob and a sniff.

"Hey."
Nic rubbed his finger softly over her cheek, where a single trail of tears led
towards her chin.
"Why the tears?
I didn't tell
you to make you sad. It was what we wanted. Lue didn't have a dominant bone in
her body. I think, though I've no proof, that for Lue, having to focus on what
I asked from her, how I treated her, helped her to stay strong. She didn't go
into hospital or a hospice until the last few weeks. And only then because I
told her it was my wish." He sighed. "It was, but only because I knew
that was where she'd get the best treatment. I loved my wife, Nina. I loved her
so very much. That lifestyle was ours. However it was hard work. To be so
totally responsible for everything, not just for
yourself
,
but for someone else, is a massive responsibility. I don't want that again. A
play session, some scening, yes, I want that very much, but I need time to
breathe as well.
To only think about myself on occasion.
If that makes me selfish, so be it."

Nic
trailed his finger from her chin toward Nina's ear and retucked those errant
strands of hair that seemed to have a mind of their own. Had he made it better
or worse?

 
She tilted her head so his palm cupped her
cheek and sighed.

"You're
one special man, you know?"

He
chuckled. If she'd just tilt her head a tiny bit more and let her mouth touch
his skin…
Do not go there.
"Not hardly
. When you love or care for someone you do
what's best for them. As a Dom, a Master, and a man that's my role.
Was my role."
He corrected himself.
"Now?
Now I'd like to play again. I'd like to be dominant and in charge in certain
things.
But in everything?
No."

"A Dom in the playroom, a
Dom in the club?
And what?"
Nina sounded interested in his answer.

"A man, a partner, a lover.
Eventually."

"Dom the Dom?"
She giggled, and her eyes
twinkled. "I bet you're sick of hearing that. It sounds like one of those
old rock songs. You should be in leather and carrying a guitar."

"How about in leather and
carrying a Shibari rope?"

"How about it?
If that's your
thing?"

"One of them.
Is it yours?"
Say yes. Shit, please say yes.
To his
dismay she shook her head.
Figures, just my luck.

"In
the interests of equality, it's my turn then." Nina leant back and
stretched her legs out.

Nic
wished that her skirt wasn't quite so demure. What he could see of her legs
gave him more than a passing fancy to see the rest. And what was between them.
He let his gaze linger on the material that covered her pussy before he moved
it to her breasts. Her nipples peaked under the thin cotton.
 

Nina
looked down her body and then stared him in the eyes. "My body might react
in the way you look at me, but that's a long way from agreeing to subbing. I've
been there, top, bottom, Domme and sub. It's not for me. Oh not for any great,
deep dark secret. I'm really not interested. I got bored with it all."

If
she'd have said she was prepared to let him strip her and take her down
Sauchiehall Street on a horse a la Lady Godiva Nic couldn't have been more
surprised than the news she'd been in the lifestyle. So what had happened to
stop that? He didn't believe the got bored with it all explanation. It sounded
rehearsed and too pat. He raised one eyebrow.
"Really?"

She
glared at him. It made no difference. He was still going to ask.

"Who
spoiled it? What did they do?"

"No one.
Nothing and
everything.
I had a fabulous teacher. But it left me dead. I was bored, and
if I was subbing I was like, oh get on with it, now did I check if I need
cheese and washing powder when I go to the supermarket. As a top I felt that I
wasn't involved enough. Evidently I throw a good long tail, and can scribe to
perfection. But my heart wasn't in it.
In any of it."

"What
made you try?"

"Silly
though it might seem, my thesis was on kink and conformity. I went into it with
an open mind. Well, it'd be hard for me not to. My twin is a big hulking
medic." She paused and rolled her eyes. "And a perfect sub."
Nina smiled. "Apart from Donny, who was not into the right mindset for
ages, and about as much help as an ice cream in an inferno, I had a good
teacher, the best. But we both agreed.
So not my scene."

Nic
gave into temptation. He leaned forward and took her chin in his hands. She
blinked, and her lips parted as her tongue traced the contour of her mouth. The
scent of an aroused woman teased Nic as he slipped his tongue inside her mouth
and let his tongue tangle with hers. She smelled of musk and spices, and all
things hot. She tasted of mint and mystery.

Nic
would have laughed at his fanciful thoughts, except he was immersed in his
senses, and thought no further than he wanted Nina.
Any way,
and any how.
And soon.

The
noise of his pager was loud and intrusive. They both jumped, and he swore as he
pulled back.

"Shit."
He checked the message. "Your friends are ready to go. So?"

"So?"

"Are
you?"

Nina
struggled up off the sofa, and he followed suit.

"I
have to. It's a hen party."

He
hadn't thought she'd say anything else, and admired her integrity, even it was
a blow to the gut.
Get real, Christopher.
Why would she do that? And if she did ditch her friends she wouldn't be the
sort of person you think she is.
"Will you meet me?
One
evening, for dinner?"

"I
don't know. I can't be what you want." She tucked her top into the
waistband of her skirt.

Creating armor?
It was a definite “this is over”
signal. He couldn't let it go like that. Sometimes you just knew something was
worth fighting for. This was one of those times.

"Can't?
Or won't?"

She
walked to the door and put her hand on the doorknob before she turned to look at
him. "Both."

Nina
was almost out of the door when Nic found his voice. "And if I accept
that, and want to be friends,"
such
an insipid word for what I'm sure we both feel,
"how do I find
you?"

She
grinned, and it lit her face up.
Gamine,
wicked, sexy,
and he was damned sure more than a little bit bratty.

"In the members list.
Athol was my teacher. I trained
and played here."

As
last words they couldn't be bettered.

Chapter Five

"What
were you up to then?" Karin shouted the question over a terrible rendition
of an old rock song that was being murdered by several of her friends. Nina was
amazed Karin had held back for so long. When she met the others back in the
foyer by herself Nina had a few loud, "ohh nudge, nudge, wink, wink, what
you been up to then," comments and sniggers. Karin had merely smiled and
squeezed Nina's arm.

Nina
had smiled. "Talking, and forgot the time."

There
had been commiserations from her friends, and a wink from Athol, which she
ignored along with the knowing grin on his face. He might think he knew what
she'd been up to, but Nina knew he didn't. And if she had her way, nor would he.
She was under no illusion that Athol hadn't been doing his own form of Domming
meddling. Somehow she thought Dominic would keep his own counsel about the time
they spent together, and Athol would be doomed forever to wonder.

Karin
on the other hand was like a hungry bird tugging on a worm, and Nina accepted
her friend wouldn't give up easily.

"And
don't give me that talking crap. This is me.
Karin who needs
to know all.
Karin the ferret.
So while we were
giggling over Monica all tied up over her clothes and Mary-Ann going white at
the sight of the St.
Whosit's
what's it,
what
were you up to?
Really."

Nina
shrugged. Evidently Karin was never going to believe her, whatever she said.

"Discussing
what we could get up to," she said lightly and rolled her eyes. "When,
where, and how."

It
was enough to make Karin giggle. "Oh okay, you were just talking then.
How boring."
She tutted.
"Nina, why?"

"Why what?"
Nina was pleased that telling
her truth wasn't believed. "Why am I boring? It's me rebelling against my
heritage. Dad was in the Australian Navy of all things, and we saw him as and
when. It didn't bother us; it was life. In fact I spent a large chunk of my gap
year with him. He owns a fruit farm in Western Australia now, and lives with
his boyfriend Ron. My mum was—is—a hippy, and dragged Donny and me all over the
place. She writes kids books, so in those days it was have typewriter, can
travel,
and by all the gods we did. She called it soul growing,
and I called it soul shriveling. At the mercy of someone else's whims, when
they really don’t understand you, is not good. Mum, bless her, could never
grasp how she could have given birth to someone as conventionally minded as me,
and said I was a throwback to Dad's side of the family. Not hers because she
has suffragettes and conscientious objectors for ancestors. She's in a yurt
somewhere in the Highlands at the moment, with a tall dark Russian called Yuri,
her cat
Mischa
, and her laptop." She smiled as
she remembered her flower loving, folk singing, unconventional parent.

"
Me
, all I wanted was a regular home, with a garden, and a
pet. Instead I got an old bus, which she moved when the mood took her, and a
twin. Well the twin bit was okay. We were best mates, but the rest? I got so
sick of outdoor living and home schooling that when I was fourteen I rebelled. Got
bossy and bolshie, yeah okay, I know I still am. I so don't like being given
orders. Told Mum either we moved into a regular house and I got to go to school,
take my exams and stuff, or I'd go to the authorities and ask to be taken into
care. She was so shocked she agreed, with the proviso we travelled in the
holidays. So that's what we did. Then after higher exams and stuff, and a
fantastic gap year, Donny did medicine, and I ended up as a teacher. Mind you I
guess I did get something from her, apart from my hair and my temper. Even
though I live in the city, and don’t want to live anywhere else, I still love
to be in the great outdoors as well.
Just not all the time.
We all meet up every few months, and have a few days of carrot juice, her
fantastic veggie stews, and do our meditation together. It really recharges the
batteries. But her life is so not for me, and
I guess
nor mine for her."

"Aw, poor you."
Karin patted her on the arm.
"Poor both of you in one way and good for you both in another.
At least you accept your differences. Now
me
and my
mum are so similar we can't be together for long without a shouting match. Well
except for here I guess, but then who knows? I'd not have guessed about
you."

Luckily you still haven't.
Nina kept her feelings from
showing. They might not be complicated, but she still wasn't ready to share
them.

"No
wonder you don't want to do anything much," Karin said. "I'd never
have suspected. Never mind, it worked for Monica, and she's having a ball
here."

Oasis
murdering had changed to killing The Killers, with Monica leading the chorus.

"Shall
we go out for dinner when you fancy it?" Karin asked.