No Good Deed (25 page)

Before the dwarf could say or do anything, a volley of arrows came in from both sides, aimed at Lucinda. Had she been just a normal person, they all would have found their mark, instead, they slowed down and fell harmlessly to the ground.

“You’re a real piece of work, Lorm.” She laughed.

He quickly stepped up before she began another attack, “Stop shooting! Gareth, come here now!”

An elf came running out of the woods, extremely scared, especially considering what had happened. “You’re the scout?” Lucinda asked.

“Y—y—y—yes,” he finally spit out.

“You call yourself a scout, don’t even know a paladin symbol. I ought gauge your eyes out and gut you where you stand.”

“By the gods, please,” he was obviously scared and may have wet himself, “I don’t look for symbols, just people. Please.” he began to cry.

“You’re pathetic!” Lucinda said, “You have to the count of 3 to get out of my sight.” Without hesitation he began to run to the woods, but Lucinda wasn’t about to let him off that easily. Just before he made it, she counted very quickly, “1—2—3, not fast enough.” She let loose a spell blasting him into several pieces. She laughed at her handiwork.

Through all this all Vanguard could do was just watch. They thought Obidaan had gotten cruel; they were getting a taste of true cruelty. Alister though repulsed by her actions was still attracted to her.

“And as for you dwarf, since you can’t seem to see what course of action you should have taken, you won’t need these anymore.” She lunged at his face and proceeded to gouge his eyes out, taking a dagger and plucking them from the sockets and dropping them on the ground. The agonizing screams the dwarf gave off made everyone around shudder. “And as for the rest of you maggots, you better remember this symbol!” She held it up over her head, “The next time you see a paladin coming down the road, get the fuck out of the way, or else.” She hopped back on her horse, clomped over the elf, leaving her bleeding, and continued down the road. Vanguard just stood there, stunned by the scene. “I hate riding alone,” Lucinda yelled back.

They began to move forward. Relina stopped to help the elf and the dwarf. She could not regrow his eyes, Lucinda saw to that, but she could ease the pain, and heal the elf.

“Come on, sis, we have to get going.” Alister said.

“Don’t worry, I’ll catch up, besides, Lucinda won’t do anything to us.” Alister rode ahead. Relina began applying healing to Lorm, “I sorry,” she said in a serious tone.

Recovered slightly from the pain, he replied, “I hope I never encounter another paladin again. Couldn’t you do anything to stop her?”

“We’re pretty much at her mercy, just like you. The fact that my husband is a paladin is the only thing keeping her in check.”

“Lucky you,” he said.

Finishing up and leaving him to his group, she got on her horse, “Yeah, lucky me,” she said sadly.

The rest of the trip was much more subdued. When they could they spent time in the woods. No one bothered them. Lucinda got obnoxious only one more time, when they stopped in an expensive restaurant at Lucinda’s insistence. After the meal was over, the fireworks started.

“Your bill,” the waiter said to each of them. When he got to Lucinda she grabbed his hand.

“This is a joke, right?” Lucinda stared at him with her pitch black eyes, “You do know who I am, don’t you.”

“Yes, madam, you are the paladin of death. I am sorry but all of our patrons pay their bill. We have had many paladins and anti—paladins in here, they all pay.”

“They’re all fools. The rest of them, I don’t care, but get this bill out of my face before I make you eat it,” she said.

Avoiding conflict, the waiter began to leave, “Yes, madam,” he said, bowed and began to leave.

“Wait,” she said and the waiter stopped. Smiling she looked around the group, “give me your bills,” they did as they were told, “tell you what, since you’re such a dumb—ass, here’s some fiber. Open up.”

He hesitated, closed his eyes and opened his mouth. She then proceeded to shove all of the bills into his mouth. And he had to stand there till he swallowed them. She then got up and headed upstairs. “I suppose you’re going to do some goodie—goodie stuff. I don’t need to see it, Alister, hurry your butt up.”

All of the members, even Alister, pitched in and tipped him the value of 3 times all the meals.

As they made for their rooms for the night, Relina grabbed Alister and pulled him to the side. “You saw what she did earlier, and what she did just now, I can’t believe you’re going to sleep with her!” she said in a loud whisper.

“Neither can I, but let’s face it, I’ve always been attracted to the oddballs,” he said in a whisper, “and they don’t get any better than her. Plus, I can tell you one thing, you won’t believe me, but just trust me,” he paused and took a deep breath, “she’s not lying when she says she hates to ride alone. You are looking at the loneliest person on the planet.”

“That doesn’t give her the right to act like such a jerk!” Relina retorted.

“True, it’s her paladin ability that gives her that right,” Alister said with a bit of a chuckle, Relina was not amused, and showed it. Alister coughed away his smile, “Anyway, she’s a different person in bed. Look, let me go to her, I’ll be fine. Believe it or not, she actually loves me.”

“Are you serious?” Relina had never imagined their relationship as anything more than another Alister conquest.

“Yes, but she’ll never admit it in public. Not soon after you and Obidaan had your baby, she tried to have one with me. I have no idea if it succeeded and she won’t tell me. But one thing she did tell me that night was how much she loved me and that if anyone was worthy of being the father of her child it was me. She actually cried that night, talking about the unfairness, and cruelty of the world. How all she wanted to be was normal, for people to ignore the eyes. She always figured that if people saw them long enough, they would just learn to get used to it; apparently that hasn’t happened.”

Relina listened intently. For a moment, she almost felt sorry for Lucinda, then she thought back to the cruelty on the road, and a new wave of rage washed over her, “I can’t stop you but I do not like it.”

“And that’s why I love ya,” he got up and kissed her on her forehead, “Look everything will be fine. And if you haven’t figured it out by our conversion, Lucinda’s true weakness,” he paused for dramatic affect, “is to be treated as a normal person. Acknowledge her paladin status, ignore her eyes, and treat her as you would any of us. At that point she doesn’t know what to do with herself. That’s why she loves me, and that’s why she still pines for Obidaan, the only two people in this world who treated her like she was normal. See ya in the morning.” Alister made his way to Lucinda’s room, Relina was 1 door down. Without knocking Alister opened the door. “Honey, I’m home,” he said in a sing songy voice, “how’s my little kitten?” He closed the door behind him as Relina went into her room. A few seconds later she could have sworn she heard some purring.

Soon, they were at their destination, Seriland. Once inside the castle walls, they stabled their horses and headed for the castle itself.

Before they entered Lucinda turned to them, “I know why you’re here, but do me a favor, keep your mouths shut, stick with me, and observe. You’re about to learn something,” they had no idea what she meant by that but were about to find out.

Inside there was secretary, taking names for audiences with the king. He looked up, saw Lucinda and immediately got out of the way. “Glad you’re learning,” she said to him. She then proceeded directly to the audience room, which was filled with ambassadors, entertainers, merchants, and common folk there to air their grievances. The room went silent when Lucinda marched in.

She proceeded directly to the thrown. Those in her way moved, quickly. It was very apparent to Vanguard that she had been here before and had business with the king.

The king, the queen, and his two children were on the dais, along with the vizier, captain of the guard, and a page. They all looked very uncomfortable to see her. Unlike the others, who stood below the thrown, she walked directly up to the king.

“I’ll bet you’re surprised to see me,” she said. “Oh, and I intercepted your lackey adventuring crew,” she pointed back at Vanguard, “so they won’t be able to help you.”

“Um, Lucinda,” the king began.

“Save it,” she said, “you know, I get really pissed off when I’m forced to come out and enforce a treaty violation. All you had to do was stay off of Maltisland’s territory and everything would have been fine, but no, you had to violate the treaty.”

“They broke it first,” the king said in his defense, “they stole a sacred artifact and we were trying to get it back.”

“Hello! You dunderheads!” she smacked him in the head, “once they broke the treaty all you had to do was sit back and wait! But no, you had to break it too, like an idiot. Now I have to deal with both of you.”

“Um.” the vizier said, “If I may intervene, I have a question.”

“Shoot,” she said.

“There was no notification of the treaty violation, no notification of your arrival, and I see no tribunal.”

“You’ve been hanging around too many goodie—goodies,” she laughed, “besides, you should really read your contracts sometimes. I hate those standard ones, so I make my own.” She pulled one out of thin air, “Is that your signature, kingy?” she showed him the contract.

“Yes,” he said timidly.

“Good. Then you should have read the final paragraphs, where it says there will be no notification of violation, except for me, I will be the sole arbitrator, and I will arrive at a time of my choosing.” She handed the contract to him and pointed out the relevant paragraphs.

“Now, how to punish you. What to do, what to do,” she was pondering.

“I am ready for any punishment you see fit,” he stood up and offered himself to her.

“That’s the thing with you good guys, always willing to sacrifice yourselves when you screw up. Sit down,” and he did, “You learn nothing that way, especially since you’re dead, or maimed. No, something a fellow paladin taught me, why go for the kill, when you can go for the pain.” She walked over to the children and grabbed them in one hand and with the other whipped out a dagger. The whole room gasped.

“By the gods! No, please!” the queen screamed.

“I’m sorry, I’ll do anything you ask, please, not the children,” the king said desperately.

“See, NOW I have your attention. Now, when I make a treaty, you’re going to heed it, instead of thinking you can deal with the consequences.” She smiled at the children, who where very frightened. “Don’t you kiddies worry, it will all be over in a moment. Now, say goodbye to mommy and daddy.”

“Goodbye mommy and daddy,” the little girl said. At that Lucinda plunged her dagger through the girl’s heart, instantly killing her. People screamed, fainted, hurled, and where aghast at the incident. The king and queen had tears streaming down their face, begging her to stop. She then threw her lifeless body at the feet of the king and queen.

“Say goodbye little boy,” she smiled.

“No,” he tried to struggle but her grip was firm.

“I was doing it as a courtesy kid,” she then proceeded to drive the dagger through his heart, killing him. “It wasn’t going to stop me.” She threw his limp body on top of his sister.

The whole room was horrified by her actions, but no one made a move against her. They knew better. The king and queen cried over their dead children’s bodies.

“Now, I hope you got the point of this little exercise, your children sure did,” she laughed at her pun. Walking over to the queen, she grabbed a piece of her robe and wiped her dagger clean with it before sheathing it. “Don’t make me have to come back out here again,” Lucinda said and left. Vanguard followed behind her in silence. Soon they were headed for Maltisland.

No one could speak as they made the 30 minute trip. “Now the funny part,” Lucinda began to talk, not caring if they listened, “is I can’t do that here. He doesn’t care about people, he cares about money and power. So, that’s what I’ll have to go after.” No one acknowledged her and she didn’t care.

They got to the gate, Lucinda looked at the guard, “Leave. Pack your bags and get out of town, now.” They abandoned their posts.

As she rode to the castle she told the local magistrate to clear the town out as fast as possible, and that no one is to ever return. The magistrate proceeded to carry out her orders.

Lucinda made her way to the emperor’s chamber. When she got there, she made her announcement. “Everyone, except for the emperor and his family, is to clear the hell out of this town and not come back. Anyone I find trying to stay who isn’t an immediate family member will be killed.” Everyone made for the door.

“This is outrageous!” the emperor screamed.

“Yes it is,” she said, “and I’m not done. I want you to bring me everything in your treasury, I’m taking it with me. I’m sick of people thinking I’m playing with them when I make a treaty.”

“But I signed it under duress; you were going to kill me.”

“I don’t care how you signed it, your signature is on it, you violated it, now it’s payback.”

“That artifact should have belonged to us! They…”

“I don’t want to hear it, get busy,” she threw a dagger and killed a guard.

“You heard her, get some carts, get some horses, hurry up,” the king said as she recovered her dagger.

A few hours later his treasury was packed up on 11 carts.

“Have fun ruling over nothing,” Lucinda said and headed out, 11 carts in tow. She proceeded out of the gate closed it and put a special spell to lock the gate so no one could get in without her. She made it so the emperor and his family could come and go, but she didn’t tell them that. “They’ll figure it out eventually” she said, and proceed down the road.

“Oh,” she reached in and pulled out a grooved orb, made of obsidian and oak. She handed it to Terry, “since you’re the leader of this group, I’ll give this to you. This is what these two idiots have been fighting over. I’ll let you figure out what to do with it. You can do the same with their tressury; I have no need for it.”