No Way Home (18 page)

Lillie lay down on the jetty and felt a slight, lingering warmth from the wooden slats on her back. She covered her eyes with her hands but Royce’s and Tyler’s faces loomed before her. Maybe the boy had a violent streak, and Royce knew about it. It was well known that Tyler had problems with drugs and alcohol. Maybe he killed Michele and then confessed to his father and asked him to protect him.

Lillie sat up again. No, she thought again. No, there’s still no reason for it. It doesn’t make sense. If it was sex she could understand it. But Michele had not been touched in that way. There was just no reason for it. And besides, she thought. If Royce had wanted to protect his son, then why had he insisted on Ronnie Lee Partin’s innocence? There he had a prime suspect he could shift the blame to, a ready-made scapegoat, and no one would even have blinked at it.

Lillie picked up the toy again and shifted it impatiently in her hands. It was a monstrous thought. And what did she really have to base it on? A toy dog like a million others. The faulty memory of a nosy drugstore owner? And what if Michele did have a crush on Tyler Ansley, a sentiment that he did not even return? Did that make the boy a suspect for murder?

Around the lake it was still light, but Lillie realized that she had been sitting there for a long time and that darkness was probably gathering in the town. She got to her feet, exhausted by the confusion of her thoughts, walked back down the jetty, and returned up the road to her car. As she suspected, the sky was turning a deep, violet blue. She threw the toy on the seat next to her and started for home.

When she arrived, Pink was in the driveway, washing his car by the back-porch light. Lillie shivered at the sight of the buckets of cold, soapy water. “Isn’t it a little late for that?” she asked.

“Well, we’ve got to be spruced up for next Friday,” said Pink. He gestured for Lillie to stand back as he ran the hose over the last of the soap on the hood.

“What for?” Lillie asked.

Pink turned off the water and, still holding the hose like a scepter, squinted at the streaks he could see in the lamplight. “I guess you haven’t heard,” he said proudly. “About our son.”

“Oh, yes, the Chamber of Commerce Award. I did hear. I was at Bomar’s place today.”

Pink picked up a rag and started to wipe off the roof. “How about that?”

“I’m very proud of him,” said Lillie.

“Proud of him?” said Pink, shaking his head. “I’ll tell you, he’s brought a lot of credit to us. He’s our hope for the future, Lillie.”

“I know it,” Lillie said softly.

Pink attacked a smudge on the windshield with a soft cloth. “I know this is crazy doing this at night, but I’ve got a lot else to do between now and Friday. I promised I’d get him a suit for the banquet. Really, when you think about it, a boy his age should have a suit.”

Lillie looked down at the toy dog in her hands. “Yes, I guess so,” she said.

“I think things are looking up for this family,” said Pink. “We just have to support our son’s endeavors and put the past behind us. I think this award is some kind of a sign.”

“Maybe,” Lillie whispered.

“What?” said Pink. “What have you got there? What were you doing over at Bomar’s today, anyway?”

Lillie opened her mouth to speak but Pink bent down to get his Turtle Wax. From behind the front fender he called out to her, “Did you know Bomar was the one who nominated him?”

Lillie knew he did not want to hear it. She knew before she said one word about it that he would be angry. He was so busy thinking about the good things he could find in life. Thinking about Grayson. And he was right, of course. There were things to be thankful for. Things to be happy about. But she said it anyway.

“I found this in Michele’s room,” Lillie said slowly, “and I think she might have bought it for Tyler Ansley.”

Pink straightened up, the wax in one hand, the cloth in the other. Despite the coolness of the evening, he was perspiring from his effort. “What did you say? What about Tyler Ansley?”

She looked helplessly at him. What about him? she thought. A boy they had known all his life. The child of a friend. She tried to imagine herself explaining how he might have been the one. The one who killed Michele. It seemed absurd, even to her. But someone had killed Michele. It could have been Tyler.

“I think Michele liked him,” Lillie said stubbornly.

Pink stared at her. “What if she did?” he said warily. “So what?”

“Pink,” Lillie said, “do you think it’s possible that he…?”

“That he what?” Pink asked impatiently.

“That he was the one who killed her,” Lillie blurted out.

“Now I’ve heard everything!” Pink shouted.

She looked sharply up at him. Although he was only partially visible in the lamplight, she could see him looking fearfully at the stuffed animal, almost as if he was afraid it would come alive in her hands.

“Pink,” she said, “what’s the matter? You look weird.”

“I look weird,” he said angrily. He daubed the wax on his rag and began to apply it to the car in jerking motions.

“That’s a good one. For chrissakes, you’re the one with the weird ideas.”

She stared at him as he applied the wax to the car. “Pink,” she said slowly, “have you been thinking the same thing?”

“Don’t be a fool, Lillie.”

“I know you, Pink. You think I might be right.”

Pink straightened up and shook the rag at her. “Did you hear one word I said to you about this family?” he demanded.

“Pink,” she persisted, “this is not just going to go away.”

Pink was shouting again. “Can’t you stop thinking about this for one minute,” he cried, “and show a little interest in your own family? Do I have to do it all? Can I ever get a little help from you?”

The door opened and Grayson stepped out on the porch, a bottle of Coke in his hand. Lillie looked up at him guiltily. “What are you two yelling about?” he asked. Then he peered into the darkness at his parents. “Dad, are you washing the car at this hour?”

Pink’s expression softened as he looked up at his boy. “I’m getting it ready for Friday,” he said. “I don’t want you showing up at the banquet in a dirty car. You’re one of the winners!”

ALTHOUGH HOME COOKIN’ HAD BEEN HIRED
to cater the Chamber of Commerce banquet and Lillie had been planning to serve, she told Brenda early in the week that she was not going to work.

She had done a lot of thinking about Pink’s complaints. No matter what suspicions, what ugly thoughts, might plague her about Michele’s death, there was no excuse for neglecting her son or her husband. She thought about going to Royce and confronting him with her theory about Tyler, but when Pink asked her sarcastically what evidence she would hit him with, she realized what an impossible accusation it was to make with no proof of any kind. She still suspected that Pink harbored the same thoughts as she about the sheriff’s son, but he denied it completely. He told her he was trying to concentrate on the present, and on what remained of their life, and Lillie realized that she had to try to do the same.

She found, however, that rejoining Pink and Grayson, trying to make a trio out of their duet, was easier said than done. Despite Pink’s professed desire for her attention, she felt like an intruder between them. You’ve let them drift so far away from you, she thought. They don’t even need you anymore.

Their major plan for the week was to go to the men’s store in town and buy Grayson a suit. Lillie brightly suggested that she go along with them, and she tried to ignore the unwilling look that passed between them at her suggestion. “It’s a men’s store,” said Grayson.

“That’s all right,” Pink amended hurriedly. “They allow women.”

Lillie tried not to be stung by her son’s reaction. It’s your own fault, she thought. You have been so preoccupied with your job, with Michele, and then with Michele’s death that they’ve come to prefer being without you. When the shopping day came, she was ready early and she chatted cheerfully on the way to town.

Once they reached the store, it required some effort for her to hold her tongue when Grayson chose the most expensive suit on the rack and Pink applauded his choice. She tried to be tactful, pointing out a few other options, but Pink announced grandly that he did not bargain-hunt when it came to his son. She decided not to protest when Grayson could not decide between two new shirts and Pink insisted that they buy them both.

When they got home Grayson tossed the expensive suit and shirts on his bed and went off to watch television. Lillie picked up the suit and hung it on the closet door.

Then she picked up the shirts and opened the bottom drawer of his bureau. When she looked in she saw a dozen new shirts, still in their bags, arrayed before her.

“Grayson,” she cried.

She stood up as the young man entered the room and pointed to the drawer. “What are these?” she demanded.

“Shirts,” he said pleasantly.

“What are you doing with all these new shirts? You haven’t even worn them.”

Grayson studied the bags in the drawer with an impassive expression. “In some cases,” he said, “I don’t have the right thing to go with them.” He bent down and picked up a yellow pinstripe. “This really needs a navy blazer, I think. And the one I have doesn’t look right in the shoulders anymore.”

“Where did you get the money to pay for these things?” Lillie asked. “You don’t even have a job.”

“I tutor sometimes,” he said defensively. “I told you that.”

“And you made enough for all these? Or did your father get them for you? And why in the world did you need two more shirts today?” she insisted.

“None of these goes with the suit,” Grayson said, closing the drawer with his foot. He turned and looked at his mother. “I thought you wanted me to look good for the dinner. 1 guess I misunderstood.”

Pink, who had heard their voices raised, appeared in the doorway.

“I do want you to look good. But this is wasteful, Grayson. You’ve got a closetful of clothes…”

Grayson turned to Pink. “Mom doesn’t think I need these clothes. Maybe we better just take them back.”

“You’re not taking anything back,” Pink said angrily, gesturing for Grayson to leave. He turned to his wife. “Would it be impossible for you just once to say something to him without criticizing him? Good God, most mothers would be bursting with pride over a boy like that. All you can do is pick at him.”

Lillie’s cheeks were burning. “I didn’t say he had to take the clothes back. I just wanted to know where he got the money for all these clothes in here. If he didn’t get it from you…”

“He didn’t get it from me,” Pink said sarcastically. “He tutors. And he likes to be properly dressed. If you paid attention, you’d know that.”

“But what does he need with so many?” Lillie protested.

Pink waved a hand at her in disgust. “Go back to your dream world, Lillie. I knew this would never work. Go back to your memories and your obsessions about Michele. Leave us be, will you?”

Lillie turned away from him, gripping the packaged shirts to her chest. Part of her wanted to scream at him, but another part thought that, in a way, he might be right. For such a long time she had not paid enough attention to her son, because of Michele, and now there was a lot about him that she didn’t know. She promised herself to try, from now on, to concentrate only on loving her son. And her husband. What they needed from her was attention and interest, not disapproval.

In the following days, the effort she made seemed to pay off. She began questioning Grayson closely about his days at school. He was suspicious at first, but her lavish praise made him garrulous about each day’s accomplishments. She learned from Grayson that he and Pink had had lunch twice together in the school cafeteria. If he was embarrassed to have his father come to school like that, he did not reveal it to her.

In keeping with her resolve, Lillie did not mention Michele’s name. When thoughts of Michele and nagging suspicions about her death began to buzz in her head, she redoubled her focus on her family. Her living family.

The night of the banquet she was ready early and it was Pink who had to be hurried along. Grayson looked sleek and elegant in his new suit. Lillie admired him effusively and he seemed to bask in her compliments.

The banquet was being held at the Briar Hill House. As they drove up its winding driveway, the old mansion glowed warmly ahead of them. But Lillie shivered at the sight. They got out of the car and stood for a moment in the damp night air, which smelled of moldering leaves. Lillie looked over at Pink, wondering if he was thinking of their last trip to this place. He avoided her gaze, turning instead to Grayson and beginning to inspect the boy’s tie, his collar and cuffs.

“He looks fine,” said Lillie. “Very handsome.” They started to walk through the decaying leaves on the lawn toward the brightly lit house.

“I’ve really been looking forward to this,” said Pink.

“So have I,” Lillie said. “Although I do dread going in there a little.”

She was immediately aware of a chill in the atmosphere. Grayson stared stonily ahead, and Pink let out a noisy sigh. All week her silence on the subject of Michele had gained their tacit approval. She could feel that her remark had offended them, as if she had broken some unspoken agreement.

“Well,” she said brightly, “this is a great occasion. May I take the arm of the guest of honor?” Grayson looked at her warily but proffered his arm. Lillie patted his cool hand as he led her into the foyer of the building.

The committee of wives had decorated the old mansion in a harvest motif, with arrangements of mums, pumpkins, and Indian corn. On the balcony, which overlooked the foyer, Gay Jones, the music teacher, was playing a piano. The love theme from Romeo and Juliet, which the spinsterish Miss Jones played with admirable flourish, wafted down and was picked up by many a hummer.

They each took a ticket for the door prize, hung up their coats, then joined the social hour, which was in full swing. Punch was being poured in the so-called library, which no longer held books but served as a perfect spot for a makeshift bar. Lillie peeked into the ballroom as she returned from the ladies’ room and saw Loretta and Brenda putting the last touches on the round tables set up there. It was a longer walk to the kitchen, but it was deemed more elegant than the cafeteria dining room for a grand occasion such as this.