Nobody's Dream (44 page)

She patted the cushion between them. “I will sleep here on the couch then.”

“Like hell. You’ll sleep in my bed.”

Her hand shook in earnest now. When Lucas reached toward her, she flinched and pulled away, sloshing her drink, but he only took the glass away and placed it on the coffee table.

“You need to stop thinking I’m going to break our agreement every chance I can, Cassie. Angel had my room to herself. There wasn’t anything sexual about it. I told you before that I have no problems being friends with a girl. If friendship is all you want out of our marriage, I can live with that decision, whatever your reasons. You’ve marked our boundaries clearly. I’ll honor them. But you need to stop expecting the worst from me at every turn. Have I ever done anything to break your trust?”

He had never been anything but respectful of her boundaries. “No. But wh-where will you be sleeping?”

“Plenty of options. Weather’s warmer now. I can bed down in the barn or in my studio.”

“No! I do not want to put you out of your own house.”

“No matter how you see it, you’re not only my friend—you’re my wife.” He reached up and brushed his thumb over her cheekbone before she placed more distance between them by sitting back. “There’s also this couch, which I’ve spent a few nights on when the bed was just too big.” He glanced away. “Stop worrying so much, Sweet Pea. Consider this place your home until you can return to your cabin.”

Tears pricked her eyes, and she blinked them away. “What if the fire…” She couldn’t complete the sentence.

“Don’t think like that. Lots of these fires just burn themselves out on trees and don’t come near structures. Crews are working night and day. Human lives, pets, and homes are their highest priorities.”

“But it seems like there are much bigger fires burning all over the state. My mountain is not very populated, so it will not be high on anyone’s list of priorities.”

“The local fire companies will make it their priority. Important thing is that you and the animals are safe. Possessions can be replaced. Your alpacas and you…”

Lucas broke off and turned away. He must be thinking about Maggie again. “You did all you could to save her.”

When he met her gaze, he seemed confused. “You know about her?”

“Your wife?” How could he think she didn’t know?

“No.” He fingered the worn wristband she’d never seen him without. “I’ve pretty much let go of the blame for that. But there was a rescue I botched up, where we lost an eight-year-old girl…”

“Oh, Lucas.” She reached out and squeezed his hand, covering the warm leather.

He stared at her hand before he continued. “It was my first year doing SAR work. I got into it after meeting Marc while doing some work at the club they were about to open. I thought it might help me unload some of the guilt I carried over losing not only my wife, but a rescue worker who tried to save her.”

Lucas took a deep breath and turned his arm over to where the wristband showed. “This was her necklace. We found it…on the trail. Apparently, she used to make beaded necklaces, and this thong was one she wore that night. It must have gotten snagged on something. The beads were scattered nearby, so I think she must have been running.” He continued to twist the braided leather and finished on a husky note. “Her parents didn’t want any reminders, but I couldn’t just toss it away.” A tear splashed onto her hand. She moved closer to him and wrapped an arm around his back.

He cleared his throat. “She’d wandered off from her family’s campsite one evening. Temperatures went below freezing that night. We did what we could, but by the time we found her…”

“I am so sorry. I know how much you care about every living creature, but to be unable to rescue her… Still, you have rescued so many others.”

“Those aren’t the ones that haunt you. I became more determined than ever not to quit after that. Haven’t lost anyone since then. Maggie used to help guide me to the lost ones, especially children. But I don’t feel her presence anymore. I think she’s moved on.”

Cassie had not sensed her around him, but did not know for certain.

He met her gaze. “When I went in search of you, I begged her to help me.” Seeing the tears in his eyes and tearstains on his face broke her heart.

“But you found me.”

“Thanks to Pic.”

“No, you deserve much more credit than that. Picasso would not have been on that mountain if not for you. You trained him to find the lost.”

He shrugged. “His former owner did a lot of the training. I just gave him a refresher.”

“I will not hear another word about this. You saved us with help from Picasso. That is all I will ever believe. You have saved many others in your years as a rescue worker. Do not ever doubt that.”

“I took the wrong path.” He looked at the wristband again. “When I found this, I thought I must be close. But I came to a fork and took the wrong path.”

“You are human. How can you be expected to find a lost child in the dark?”

“It was my job.”

“Were you the only person out searching that night?”

“Of course not. We had every available person looking for her.”

“Lucas, you did your best with what you knew at the time. Now with Picasso, you will do even better in the future.”

He nodded. “That’s one of the reasons I’m so passionate about training horses for SAR work. He’d have been able to track her even in rough terrain like that. He could have covered more ground than the search dogs, too.”

“May I ask why you torture yourself by wearing that band every day?”

He shrugged. “I can’t let myself forget her death. By wearing this, I not only remember her and what she taught me, but I think her parents wanted me to keep it so I would never let down another family like that again.”

“I do not think they would be that cruel. I think they just did not want the reminder. They were in shock. No parent would blame you for trying.”

“I was the one who eventually… I had been within feet of her at one point during the night, but she didn’t answer when I called her name.”

Cassie could stand it no longer. She wrapped both arms around him and held on tightly. He returned the hug, squeezing the breath from her lungs.

“Lucas, she was probably terrified and taught not to speak to strangers. Perhaps she was already unconscious and succumbed to hypothermia without being aware what was happening.”

He ran his hand through his hair. “I’ll never know. But I’ll never forget, either.”

Cassie learned long ago not to have sentimental attachments to material possessions. They were not what mattered in life. Even her studio and altar could be resurrected. People could not, well, not in the same body anyway.

Losing someone you loved—or someone you felt you needed to protect—those losses could never be replaced.

Even though her cabin had been her sanctuary for years, since Lucas left, it had seemed more like a prison. But she would not survive long down here in the valley, especially having to deal with the stress of being around Lucas Denton all the time.

She dreaded the thought of having to start over. What if her landlady would not rebuild the only home Cassie had known for the past four years? The woman was up in years and might not want to undertake such a daunting task just to have a rental property.

If forced to move, Cassie would miss the spirit of the place she had found in the mountains of her adopted state.

Please, Goddess, do not take my home away. Not again.

*     *     *

Luke decided Cassie needed her space. She seemed a little fragile. No surprise given what she’d been through today.

“Why don’t I show you around before I go out to the barn to settle Picasso down for the night?”

“That would be nice.” She stood.

Luke showed her the kitchen first, in case she was hungry. “I have some ready-to-eat stuff in the pantry. Simple fare, but we won’t starve. Just choose what looks good to you, and I’ll fix supper when I come back in.”

“I can fix us something.”

“No way. You’ve been through a lot today. Just relax.”

The wariness never left her expression. Luke sighed. This girl had some serious trust issues. Pissed him off that after all this time she still didn’t trust him as far as she could throw him, even though he’d never done anything to disrespect her boundaries.

Her wounds must be bone-deep. If he ever got his hands on the asshole who hurt her…

After explaining the idiosyncrasies of the old appliances he’d inherited with the place, he guided her toward the bedroom door. Knowing she’d probably freak out if he was with her in there, he opened the door and pointed. “Bed’s all yours.” Good thing he’d made it this morning. “Bathroom’s over there. I have plenty of western shirts in the closet and T-shirts in the dresser if you want to change into something clean. Just leave your clothes in the laundry basket, and I’ll put in a load of wash before we go to bed.”

At the mention of them going to bed, she glanced at the only bed in sight, nibbling her lower lip. Damn it, how was he going to make her see she had nothing to worry about?

Show her. Don’t tell her.

Trust building took time. He’d continue to be patient.
God, don’t ever give her a reason to doubt his trustworthiness.

Cassie walked into the room and turned, her hand on the knob. “Thanks for everything, Lucas.” Without waiting for him to say anything, she closed the door.

Well, now…

Luke shook his head as he carried their empty glasses into the kitchen and set them by the sink before heading for the front door. Grabbing his Stetson, he left the house and glanced up at Cassie’s mountain. Smoke covered half the west side of the mountain, just where they’d been a couple of hours ago. A shudder passed through him as he thought what could have happened if Pic hadn’t tracked her down. That horse was in for a bonus scoop of oats tonight and an extra-long rubdown.

He’d try to keep Cassie busy in the house so she wouldn’t watch the progression of the fire toward her cabin, but Luke knew the chances of her place being spared were slim now. When he was eight, their rental house had burned to the ground. Luke had learned then not to become too attached to material things. Had Cassie taken everything of sentimental value with her?

More than likely, the studio held the most sentimental value for her. Maybe it would survive. There wasn’t much in
his
studio Cassie could use. Her artistic talents took a different form than his. Maybe they could get through to Breckenridge tomorrow. She could stock up on new art supplies. Best medicine for her would be to get back to creating art.

Of course, she’d be headed to Karla’s again in a few days for the baby shower. Then came her gallery opening. Still, he would have at least a few days with her.

Inside the barn, he heard the cria clicking. Funny how he recognized Millie from the others. They had a special bond, though. He poked his head inside and found the youngest alpaca poking at Gracie’s tit for some milk. Did alpaca moms have milk production problems when stressed? Luke let himself inside and walked over to the two. He stroked Gracie’s long neck.

“There now, girl. You’re safe now. No one’s gonna hurt you here as long as I have anything to say about it.” The soulful eyes of the new
mamá
searched his, and then she nodded almost imperceptibly. Smart animals. It was as if she understood as much as his horses did.

“She’s never handled change very well.”

Luke turned to watch Cassie let herself inside the stall and lock it behind her. The girl didn’t following instructions well. She should be resting. He noticed she wore one of his plaid shirts and a pair of his jeans, rolled several times. He wondered what she used to hold them up around her tiny waist, but didn’t ask. She let the shirt cover her down to her thighs.

They needed to go shopping for clothes, too.

Gracie moseyed over to her. Almost sounded like she was crying. Cassie wrapped her arms around her neck, nuzzling her cheek against the animal’s soft fleece.

“Todo va a estar bien, estamos seguros aqui.”

Luke smiled. He’d been around enough Spanish speakers in Texas to translate her
“Everything’s gonna be okay. We’re safe here.”
Would she have admitted that she felt that way to him? Probably not. He ought to ’fess up about his limited Spanish skills, but it might be interesting to see—and hear—what he’d learn about her.

“I’ll just leave you to take care of these girls while I check on Pic.”

Cassie glanced in his direction and nodded. He waited to see if she’d say anything, disappointed when she didn’t.

As he turned away, he heard her whisper, “Lucas is our hero, girls.”

Pride swelled in his chest. He was glad he’d heard those words. He wanted to be a hero in her eyes. Luke wore a sappy grin the entire time he took care of Picasso. The horse barely flinched when he came into his stall now. “You were amazing today and a great sidekick. I’m so proud of you.” He stroked the horse’s neck. “Thank you for finding Cassie and her girls. They needed us, and you were there for them.”

The horse nickered and dipped his muzzle into his feed bucket. Luke picked up the comb and grooming spray and began to work the brambles out of his tail. He’d worked his way almost halfway up the tail when he heard the stall door hinges squeak.

“May I help? I owe Picasso a lot.”

“Sure. Why don’t you grab the currycomb and start on his mane? He picked up a lot of dirt and debris out there today.” Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Cassie eye the assortment of combs and brushes on the table. “It’s the blue rubber one.”

She nodded and picked it up, going to work with a persistent but gentle hand. “Here, spray on some of this. Makes it easier to remove the tangles and will keep them away a few days. We may get called out again.”

She nodded and accepted the bottle from him. Their fingers touched, and he felt electricity spark between them. Damn, he’d gone too long without a woman if the mere touch of their fingertips turned him on.

Not that it was any surprise he found her attractive. He’d been aware of her in that way since they met last fall at the hospital. Hell, even before Karla had shown him the sketch Cassie had drawn, he’d been watching her for hours as her hand flew over the sketchpad, never realizing she was sketching an image of Maggie and their unborn baby.