Nom Nom Paleo: Food for Humans (21 page)

Pop quiz, hotshot: What’s the best-selling salad dressing in the United States?

Why, it’s ranch dressing, of course! (If you guessed wrong, you really ought to pay closer attention to the title of the recipe on this page.)

Invented by the owners of Santa Barbara’s Hidden Valley Ranch in the mid-
1950
s, this creamy condiment long ago overtook Italian dressing in the hearts and minds of salad-tossing Americans. These days, supermarket shelves are brimming with ranch-flavored products, from snack chips to marinades—but store-bought ranch dressing isn’t considered a health food for good reason. The stuff’s made with hyper-processed canola-heavy mayonnaise and a multitude of chemical additives.
No bueno.

Knowing this, I avoided ranch dressing for years, but Owen kept asking for it. “Carrot sticks just don’t taste the same if I can’t dip them in ranch dressing,” my son reasoned. True enough.

“Want ranch dressing?” I asked. “Then we’re going to have to come up with a recipe together.” We did, and this creamy, herby dressing turned out to be one of the easiest condiments I’ve ever Paleo-fied.

S
tir the ingredients together in a bowl until smooth. If desired, cover and refrigerate to thicken slightly before serving. This ranch dressing will keep for up to a week in the refrigerator.

Although rémoulade was invented in France, it’s the Creole version that makes me swoon. The addition of paprika lends a ruddy complexion and piquant flair to this classic condiment. Rémoulade is often served with seafood—it’s fantastic with
Fried Salmon Patties
or
Spicy Coconut Shrimp
—but don’t underestimate the versatility of this creamy dressing. You’ll love it on everything from
Chicken Nuggets
to
Perfect Hard-Boiled Eggs
. Or just slather it on some homemade
Roast Beast
. After all, rémoulade was originally made to accompany meat.

S
tir together all the ingredients in a bowl until smooth and thoroughly combined. Refrigerate the rémoulade in a covered container, and it’ll keep for up to a week.

N
ot hot enough for you? Mix in 1 small jalapeño pepper, finely diced. I bet you'll feel the heat. 

Those tiny bags of roasted, spiced almonds from gourmet markets are delicious, but they’re not exactly wallet-friendly. Plus, store-bought nuts are typically cooked in decidedly non-Paleo fats, like highly processed seed oils. The solution? Roast your own almonds. I’ve done this successfully with a number of different spices, but rosemary’s my hands-down favorite; the woody herb lends a warm, piney aroma to the nuts. A note of warning, though: roasted almonds are dangerously addictive. Proceed with caution.

1. M
   elt the ghee in a large skillet over medium-low heat.
   
2. T
   hrow in the nuts, making sure they’re in a single layer. Stir until the almonds are coated in the ghee, and then add the rosemary, salt, and pepper. Taste and adjust the seasoning.
   
3. T
   oast the almonds, stirring often, until slightly darkened and aromatic, about
   8
   to
   12
   minutes. Transfer the nuts to a plate and cool to room temperature before serving. You can also store them in an airtight container for up to a week—though I think they taste best on the first day.