Not Just Another Romance Novel (25 page)

I nodded. “Lots of good looking men.” Oh God. My voice came out all slurry.

Dallin’s smile widened. He took my comment to mean I was interested in all of the good looking men, and apparently he placed himself in that category.

I hated big round booths, especially when I’d been drinking. The sudden urge to use the restroom hit me. Immediately. Like emergency level.

I scooted toward Dallin because there were fewer people on his side. “Mind if I get out?” I asked.

He nodded and turned toward the girl next to him. They moved out to accommodate me. The fake leather of the booth squeaked under me as I scooted out, but luckily the music was loud enough to cover the embarrassing sound.

Easton shot me a look when I got to the end of the booth, as if to ask where I was going. “Restroom,” I mouthed to him, and he nodded.

It was nice someone was looking out for my well-being. I appreciated it.

What was not so nice was the long line to use the restroom. I hopped back and forth on my feet, trying to focus on anything other than the insane need to relieve myself.

There were six girls in front of me and only two stalls. I shouldn’t have waited so long.

I pulled my phone out of my purse for a distraction. I found a new text from Dax.
Going on stage in ten. Feels weird without you here.

It was sent about an hour earlier, which meant he was in the middle of his set.

I suddenly missed him with an ache. It was odd how severely it hit me in that moment. I was also pretty drunk, which may have explained it. I just wasn’t lucid enough to realize it.

I texted back, focusing on my phone with one eye and backspacing about fifty times until I finally spelled all of my words correctly.
Wish I was there watching you. I miss you.

I knew I wouldn’t get a reply until after the show, but at least the text would be waiting for him when he saw his phone.

I pulled up my last text to Scott. It showed that it had been delivered, which meant he had seen it. It didn’t necessarily mean he had read it, but I had to assume he had. And he hadn’t written me back.

It hurt knowing I’d poured myself into a text he hadn’t bothered to respond to. But the unknown hurt more. I didn’t know where we stood. I didn’t know how things would change now. I didn’t know when I’d see him again. I didn’t know how he felt now that he’d confessed his secret to me.

And I didn’t know how I felt about him.

As much as missing Dax had hit me over the head only seconds earlier, I felt an equal ache for Scott. I missed him, but I’d been missing him much longer than I’d been missing Dax. I’d missed Scott since he’d started pulling away, which I supposed was right about when I started getting close to Dax.

I started typing out a new message to Scott, but I didn’t even know what to say. I typed “I think I might have feelings for you,” but I didn’t hit send. I was a little drunk, but not so drunk I thought sending that text would be a good idea. If Scott and I were going to have a talk about feelings, it was going to be face to face.

Besides, I was with Dax.

I really had to figure out what I was going to do. They each had attributes which I loved, but I knew I couldn’t have both. I didn’t want to lead anybody on, but at the same time, I was selfish. I wasn’t willing to let go of either of them.

It was finally my turn to use the restroom, which pulled me from my thoughts for at least a short time. I washed my hands and stared at myself in the mirror, wiping my face with a paper towel and feeling just the tiniest bit more sober. When I exited the restroom, Dallin was waiting in the hallway for me.

He grabbed my hand and led me to the dance floor. This was not at all the boy I wanted to be dancing with. Not that I really wanted to dance with Easton, either, but at least Easton had a bigger purpose. Dallin not only had no chance, but he would only confuse things further.

I tried to politely decline, but he just grabbed me around the waist and twirled me around. I looked back to our table for help, but Easton was paying no attention to the dance floor. He was looking past Flynn to one of the girls at the table—I couldn’t remember any of their names—clearly putting his flirting skills to the test.

I allowed Dallin to pull me around the dance floor for exactly one song. “I’m just going to head back to get my drink,” I told him.

He nodded and followed me back to the table. He picked up my beer and handed it to me, and then he pulled my hand back to the dance floor.

I shot Easton a pleading look, one he actually caught this time.

I watched him scoot out of the booth with one of the girls. They headed toward the dance floor, and then he was next to Dallin and me. I felt a huge measure of relief, and I guzzled down the rest of my beer.

“Slow it down, Piper,” my stepbrother warned as he shook his head.

I grinned widely, trying to figure out some way to switch partners so I could dance with him instead. And then the music did it for me.

The full beer hit my system just as “Pump Up the Jam” by Technotronic started playing. I looked over at Easton with wide eyes. His eyes were lit with laughter when they met mine.

“Pump Up the Jam” was a song from our shared childhood. The song was older than me, but Heath played it every morning when he drove us to school the first year he and my mom were married. He claimed it would pep us up for our day. Even when I was in a bad mood or crabby because it was too early, the song always managed to pump me up for my day.

And so when it started playing, it was like a sign. I ditched Dallin, Easton ditched his dance partner, and the two of us started jumping around like idiots to the upbeat music. We both reverted to children with our dance moves. Easton pulled out the Running Man while I did my best Sprinkler, and we both laughed hysterically. It was the kind of laugh where tears were running down my cheeks and my stomach hurt and I couldn’t pull in enough breath to sustain the laugh. And Easton’s reaction was exactly the same. We switched up our dance moves. He started the Shopping Cart while I moved onto the Lawnmower. We both continued laughing through the entire song, and it felt so freeing and good to be laughing after the heavy day I’d had.

I gave Easton a tight hug after our dance, and my tears of laughter somehow morphed into sadness.

Oh God. I was one of those emotional drunk messes. It wasn’t pretty.

Alcohol tended to fuel emotional highs and lows, but I’d never been hit with the high immediately followed by the low only seconds later.

Suddenly I was sobbing as my stepbrother held me in a hug. “You okay?” he asked in my ear, and I pulled back and shook my head. He grabbed my hand, pulled me to our table, and threw a few bills down. He said some quick goodbyes, and then the two of us headed out to his car. My tears hadn’t subsided. I was an emotional wreck, and I wasn’t even sure why.

Easton helped me into his passenger seat, and as soon as he started the car, he started the questions. “What’s going on?”

We’d never been especially close, but we were both adults now. Maybe he’d have some insight to help me with my major issues.

And if not, maybe I’d figure out some way to hit on him.

I didn’t answer his question, and he kept shooting me worried glances throughout our car ride home. I cleared my tears and worked up the courage to do what I’d come here to do. Well, to do what I’d come to do aside from celebrating Thanksgiving with my family.

I was about to hit on my stepbrother.

Oh, fuck.

He pulled into the driveway and cut the engine. I put my hand on his thigh, and he looked down at my hand. He studied it for a moment, and then his eyes looked up at me.

“Why is your hand on my leg?” he asked quietly. His eyes held none of the heat and the lust men usually directed at me when I put my hand on their thigh.

“Oh,” I said, removing my hand and feeling like an idiot. “Sorry. I, uh, thought that was my leg.”

He gave me a strange look and sighed heavily. “Are you okay, Piper?”

I looked over at him and worked up every last ounce of liquid courage remaining in me. I unbuckled my seatbelt and leaned in toward him. He backed away evenly with my movements, his eyes wide, until his head hit the window.

“What the fuck are you doing?” He unbuckled his seatbelt and scrambled out of the car. He practically ran into the house, and I sat in his car for a few minutes, wondering how I was ever going to face him again. He had asked a pretty good question. What the fuck
was
I doing?

26

The next morning greeted me with a pounding headache. I turned to check the clock, and my stomach roiled, threatening to lift up the contents of everything I’d consumed the night before.

And not only did my stomach and head hurt, but my pride was severely damaged after I had tried to kiss my stepbrother and had been denied.

I would have to play it off as a drunken mistake. That was clearly the only way I’d possibly get through my week at home.

I took a long, hot shower, and I felt somewhat human again afterward. Every part of me longed to call Scott to tell him how things had gone with my stepbrother the night before. He’d laugh with me and make me feel better. He was one of the few people who knew what I’d been planning aside from Austin and Shannon. Somehow I knew neither of them would offer the same insight as my (former) best friend.

I picked up my phone after my shower to check my texts, and I had two new ones.

The first one was from Dax.
Wish I was heading to your bed now instead of sleeping alone tonight.

I felt better that at least he was sleeping alone, even though a small measure of guilt hit me when I thought with disgust about how I’d tried to kiss Easton the night before.

Another measure of guilt hit me when I saw the second text.

This guilt was a little bit bigger, though.

It was from Scott. And when I clicked it to read it, I saw the message I’d typed out the night before. Only it wasn’t in draft mode.

I’d somehow sent it.

Oh, fuck.

My text told Scott I thought I had feelings for him.

Scott’s reply acknowledged that.
You think you do? Or you KNOW you do? Because I can’t watch you with the rock star while you figure it out. Use your time away to decide what you want.

Tears filled my eyes. It was like a leaky faucet up in there lately.

His text had been harsh. His words were harsh. But they were words I needed to hear, and there was an honesty behind them that made my heart ache.

I just wasn’t sure who my heart ached for. It was the same dilemma, only it was getting more and more intricate. I had Dax the Rock Star telling me he missed my bed, and then I had Scott the Best Friend telling me I needed to decide what I wanted.

The words from Dax fit the sexual nature of our relationship, and the words from Scott fit the emotional side of our relationship.

So did I want the mind-blowing sex that could turn into a deep emotional connection down the line? Or did I want the deep friendship that may or may not come with a bonus side of amazing sex?

Hungover the morning after hitting on my stepbrother didn’t seem like the most appropriate time to make that decision.

So I left my phone in my bedroom and headed down for breakfast. Or, as I noticed the time…lunch.

Lucky for me, my stepbrother was already out doing his thing when I slipped into my chair at the kitchen table. My mom poured me a steaming cup of coffee, kissed the top of my head, and sat down next to me.

“Fun night?”

I shrugged, and she laughed.

I winced at her loud laughter, which only prompted her to laugh even louder.

“Did your night out help you sort your feelings?”

I shook my head. “I did something really stupid last night.”

Okay, if I was being honest, I did a couple of really stupid things the night before, but I would never, ever admit to my mom I’d tried to kiss Easton.

“What happened, honey?”

“I accidentally texted Scott that I think I have feelings for him.”

“Accidentally?”

“I might have been a little drunk, and I typed out the text knowing I would never send it. But somehow it sent and I had a text back from him this morning.”

“What did his say?” Her gaze of concern only made me feel like a bigger moron.

“That I needed to be sure of my feelings and to use my time at home to decide what I want.” I took a sip from the coffee mug.

She mirrored my action, taking a sip of her own coffee. “He sounds smart.”

“He is smart. Really smart.”

“And handsome?”

I blushed, refusing to answer. Yes, handsome. Incredibly handsome. And strong and sexy.

“What about the other boy?”

“Dax?”

She nodded, and I sighed.

“He texted me, too. He misses me.”

“Do you miss him?”

I nodded. “Our relationship is…” I trailed off, unsure how to describe it to my mom. If I was talking to a friend, I might’ve been able to talk about the sexual nature of our relationship. How incredibly hot Dax was. How just seeing him on stage made me want him like I’d never want another man. But we went deeper than sex, too. We’d built a little bit of a foundation of friendship before we hopped into bed. Dax was caring and funny and sweet.

“Is what?” she asked.

I shook my head. “I don’t know. Complicated. We have so much fun together.”

“But Scott is on your mind?”

“He has been. I started noticing him right about the time he started pulling away from me.”

“Could it be a case of not knowing what you had until it was gone?”

“That’s exactly what it is. But it’s become bigger than that. I have real feelings for him.”

“Love?”

I shrugged. “I have no idea. I love him as my friend. I think we could be great together. But I’m starting something great with Dax, too. Can’t I just have both of them?”

My mom took my trembling chin in her hand. Her eyes were soft and kind. “Honey, no. You can’t. You have to decide, and only you can do that. Only you know what’s in your heart, and I’m here to listen to you sort it out any time you want. Okay?”

She let go of my chin, and I nodded sullenly into my coffee. She was right. Only I could make that decision, but I just had no idea how to do it.

I went grocery shopping with my mom. We picked up the sweet potatoes and the turkey and every other ingredient for every other dish she planned to make two days later. The house would be filled with family on Thursday, and I’d be glad for the diversion of prepping for the arrival of relatives I hadn’t seen since the year before. My mom had three sisters, and they all rotated who hosted Thanksgiving. This year fell on my mom, and I’d do whatever I could to help prepare the house and cook the meal.

Pretty much the entire family lived within an hour of my mom’s house, so she saw her sisters often individually. But Thanksgiving was the one holiday when everyone got together for the whole day. That meant three aunts, two uncles, and seven cousins. I fell in the middle of my cousins age-wise. I was closest to Jamie, who was two years older than me, mostly because we shared romance novels and texted occasionally about the latest one the other simply had to read.

I couldn’t wait to share my master’s project with her. I hadn’t even thought about getting advice from someone so far removed from my circle who knew me well. Maybe she’d have some insight into my issue with Dax versus Scott.

Or maybe she’d tell me the same damn thing everyone else had been telling me—I was the only one who could make the decision.

And I’d just been thinking how having family over was going to be a great diversion. Instead I already committed to rehashing the entire story to my cousin.

I didn’t know where Easton was all day, but it was just as well. I didn’t want to face him. The day went fast between helping my mom shop and then clean, and I was still a little hungover, so I called it an early night, opting to head to my room to read before I fell asleep. Or, if I was really being honest, opting to head to my bedroom before Easton came home.

Just as I was crawling into bed a little after nine, my phone rang. I glanced at the screen.
Dax Hunter.

I smiled as I picked up the call. “Hey, you.”

“Hey.” His voice was soft, but he sounded like he was smiling.

“How are you?”

“Okay. You?”

“Okay. A little hungover.”

He chuckled. “It’s nine o’clock at night.”

“Last night was pretty rough.”

“Nothing like Vegas.” He said it like he’d been there before. He got it.

“Well, we’re not anywhere near the strip. My stepbrother took me to a bar with some of his friends.”

“Male friends?”

I detected a hint of jealousy in his tone, and for some reason it warmed me to know he was a little jealous. “Male and female.”

“Anything I need to know about?”

If he only knew. “Nope. One of my stepbrother’s friends tried to hit on me, but I politely declined.” I left out the bit about crying to Easton and subsequently trying to kiss him. God, what had I been thinking? My project was so not worth the potential consequences that awaited me.

“That’s my girl.”

My girl
. When he said things like that, I just melted.

“What about you? How was the show last night? Any ladies I need to be worried about?”

He chuckled. “The show was…good.”

I giggled. “So it was amazing?”

“Yeah.” His tone brightened. “Brody’s been working with an agent. A couple of scouts from different labels showed up last night.”

“Oh my God, Dax! That’s awesome!”

“We played really well. I’m not getting my hopes up, but you never know what might come from it.”

“Will you still remember me when you’re a famous rock star touring the world?” I asked.

He paused, and my heart raced while I wondered what his answer would be. “How could I forget you when you’ll be there with me?” His voice was soft and sincere, and my eyes filled with tears.

How could I even possibly think about letting this man go?

***

The next day was more of the same. Easton successfully avoided me. I unsuccessfully tried to stop wallowing in my drama. My mom started prepping the food and I did whatever I could to be helpful. It was a little after three in the afternoon when my phone rang.

It was Austin.

“What’s going on with you and Scott?” he demanded after I greeted him.

“Nothing,” I muttered.

“Piper. It’s me. Talk to me.”

“Why are you asking me? Why don’t you ask Scott?”

“He’s the one who told Shannon and me you two weren’t talking. That was all he’d say.”

We weren’t talking. That was true. But it went a little deeper than that. “How did it even come up?”

“We went to dinner on Monday. Scott seemed down, so I asked him what was going on.”

“Is he okay?”

Austin was quiet for a minute. I waited for his answer with bated breath. Finally, he sighed. “I’m not sure.”

“He told me he’s in love with me.”

“Oh my God.”

“I know.”

We were both quiet while Austin processed my confession.

“What did you say?” he asked.

“Nothing. He ran away from me right after he said it.”

“What would you have said if he hadn’t ran away?”

“I’m not sure.”

“What about Dax?”

“What about him? He doesn’t have anything to do with this.”

“Yes he does, Piper. He’s got feelings for you, too. But who do you have feelings for?”

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

“Too bad.”

I thought about hanging up, but Austin was my friend. It wasn’t his fault I was a hot mess.

“Look, I’m friends with both of them. I don’t want to get involved, and I won’t tell you who to choose. But if you need to talk, you can talk to me.”

I sighed. “I think I’m in love with two men.”

“Thank God you admitted it.”

“You knew?”

“It’s obvious, my friend. I’ve been watching you falling for Dax. He’s everything any girl could possibly want. He’s attractive. He’s talented and successful. He’s got that naturally fit build. And I’ve seen the way you look at Scott. You’ve been looking at him as more than a friend for a long time now.”

“I have?”

Austin chuckled.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I thought you wanted to be with Dax.”

“I do.”

“But you want to be with Scott, too?”

“I guess. And then I got drunk Monday night and accidentally sent him a text that I thought maybe I had feelings for him.”

“No wonder he hasn’t left his apartment in two days.”

I groaned. “I feel like such an asshole.”

“Don’t. It will all be okay.”

“Will it?”

“Everything happens for a reason, Piper.”

“Clichés aren’t really helping.”

“So you probably don’t want to hear that you should listen to your heart?”

“If one more person tells me that, I swear to God…”