Num8ers (32 page)

I’m not running away from her. I’m running away from what I might have done to her. It’s better this way. Better for both of us if I keep on running and never go back.

I wont be able to take much. He always gives me a lift to school, and He’ll notice any extra bags. So it’s only what I can get in my normal bag, and money. If I’ve got enough money with me, I can buy anything else I need.

They’ll look at my account when I go. Ask the police or someone to see what I’ve been spending, where I’ve been. So cash is the thing. As much cash as I can find.

I’ve been pinching tenners out of my mum’s purse for weeks now. One at a time, so she won’t notice. I know Dad keeps cash in His study. I haven’t had the nerve to go in there — it’s His room, it smells of Him. Even when I know He’s not in the house, won’t be back for ages, I can’t bring myself to do it.

Now, it’s different. I’m going to go tomorrow. I take all the books out of my schoolbag — I’ll manage without them — then I carefully fold up some underwear, my favorite T-shirts, some
track pants. I look at my jeans in the drawer. I really want to take a pair — they’re all I wear normally, but even my favorites, the ones I’ve worn and washed ‘til they’ve gone soft and floppy, won’t zip up now. No point taking things I can’t wear.

I count up the cash I’ve got stashed away: eighty-five euros, not enough. I know Marty and Luke have got some money. Can I steal from my brothers? I could — if they weren’t in their rooms right now. I need more. It’s going to have to be Dad’s money.

He’s out for the evening, entertaining some clients at dinner. Mum’s watching TV in the sitting room. I pass by the doorway, and hesitate. There’s another way, isn’t there? I don’t have to leave. I could go in there now, sit down next to her, and tell her. She’d have to do something then, wouldn’t she? Ring the police? Throw Him out? Or gather all our things up and take us somewhere, me and the boys?

Or would she tell me to shut up? Send me to my room for telling such wicked lies? Or shrug her shoulders, say that’s just the way things are, the way He is?

At the back of my mind, I know that she already knows.

How can she not know?

IT ALL ADDS UP!

PRAISE FOR
NUM8ERS

“Even the idea of this book gave me chills. How would
you
like to know someone’s fate just by looking in their eyes? Creepy and original!”

— R.L. Stine

“A page-turner: Engrossing and au-courant. One thing is certain:
Ward’s
Numbers
is ace.”

— The Los Angeles Times

* “A gritty tale, unsparingly told. Stark and honest.”

— Publishers Weekly,
starred review

* “Gritty, bold, and utterly unique. The ending is a real shocker.”

— School Library Journal,
starred review

“A lovely, bittersweet tearjerker about living life to the fullest.”

— Kirkus