Oathbreaker (18 page)

Finally, I laid down and tried to sleep. No one would even start to wonder about me until the morning, so I couldn’t be expecting the cavalry any time soon, and there was nothing else I could do until Balder decided to brave my presence again. I closed my eyes and wrapped myself in thoughts of Trevor, Odin, and Vidar. What the hell kind of name was Vidar anyway? I bet Odin had picked it. Hmph, men.

Chapter Eighteen

The sounds of battle woke me and I rubbed at my eyes as I tried to clear the sleep and my weirdo dreams away. Sleeping on cold stone while shackled in chains was not conducive to a good night’s rest.

I finally focused on the door and saw it start to shake. I stood up, eying it warily, and was happy to find that all the effects of the sedative had worn off in the night. I was standing steady by the time the door burst open.

“Vervain,” Vali strode through the splintered remains and folded me into his arms.

“
Vali?” I hugged him back but it seemed a little overly emotional, coming from him.

“
I'm so glad you're okay,” there were tears in his eyes. Okay, that was definitely more drama than I expected from Vali.

“
I'm glad too but are you okay? Has something else happened?”

“
Something else? Like your abduction isn't enough?” He searched my eyes and then frowned. “You don't remember me at all, do you?” He smiled like Eeyore.
Thanks for noticing me
.

“
I'm so sorry,” I swallowed hard. What the hell hadn't Odin told me this time. Or maybe this was something Odin didn't know about. Oh gross, did Sabine cheat on Odin with his son?

“
You may not have been my actual mother,” he blinked away the tears. “But you were the only mother I've known. I've always thought of you as mine, even though I know you're not. My Mom basically gave birth to me and left. Frigg ignored me completely. Then you came and you were always kind to me, treated me no differently than you did Vidar, after you bore him. I thought you might remember that, but of course you wouldn't have the same connection to me as you do to your real son.”

I gripped his hand and his face blurred, becoming younger and younger until I saw him as a stoic four year old, arms folded over his chest while he stared me down with a mixture of jealousy and suspicion. Feelings flowed through me quickly; frustration, determination, love. They made no sense until the story unraveled in my head and filled in the gaps.

He was four when I married Odin. His mother had abandoned him when he was still in the cradle and Odin's ex-wife had been apathetic about his presence at best. By the time I showed up, he was starving for affection but he was also his father's son. He didn't want to want me, didn't want to admit to needing a mother. Most importantly, he didn't want to admit to being hurt by his mother's absence or Frigg's neglect. It had taken months to win his trust, even longer to coax a smile from the withdrawn child. Then one day, he'd hugged me and called me Mommy. I'd been his from that moment on.

Now the grown man stood before me, thinking I'd forgotten him. Believing, once again, that he was not important enough, not good enough, just plain not enough. When the truth was, he'd had my heart before Vidar did. I'd been his mother first.

“Vali,” when had I started crying? Egads, it felt like that was all I was doing lately. When had my life become a twisted Hallmark special? “It's another life. I just needed a little nudge, Lili.” His eyes got round when I used the nickname I'd given him centuries ago. I kissed the top of his fingers, like I did when he was little, and I saw him start to shake. “How could you think I'd feel no connection to you? Don't you know? You were my first son. I treated you and Vidar the same because you
were
the same to me. Just because I didn't carry you in my body, doesn't make you any less mine. I taught you, guided you, loved you. I kissed away your pain and held you when you were frightened. I am your mother, not that bitch who ran out on the best thing she ever did.”

“
Mom,” he hugged me again and we were both laughing and crying when Trevor came bursting into the room.

“
Vervain,” he frowned at the strange sight.

“
Trevor,” I let Vali go and he graciously stepped aside for my wolf, wiping at his face discreetly. Trevor swooped in and pulled me tight against him. I sighed as I felt his soul reconnect with the wolf in me. It seemed like it had been too long since we’d touched. “I missed you so much.”

“
Missed me?” He pulled back and looked down at me. “How do you get into so much trouble?”

“
Mother?” Vidar came around Trevor and looked me over carefully. His eyes widened when he saw the cut on my face. “I’ll kill him slowly.”

I looked sharply at Trevor but he only nodded. He knew already, of course he did, he was Froekn and the Norse gods were his pantheon. He probably realized that Vidar was my son as soon as I’d told him who Odin believed me to be. That kind of stuck in my craw. Why hadn't he prepared me for it? And what exactly was a craw anyway?

“I’m fine, baby, don’t kill your brother,” I left Trevor to hug Vidar quickly. “Where’s Odin?”

“
Chasing Balder,” Trevor pulled me back against him. “He ran like the weasel he is.”

“
Not that I’m complaining, honey-eyes but why are you here?”

“
I had a visit from Rain. He made some insinuations and...” his jaw clenched. “I don’t know what I expected but it wasn’t to find you missing.”

“
You expected to find me in bed with Odin, huh?” I peered up at him and he looked away in embarrassment. “I love you, no matter who I’ve loved in the past. One does not negate the other.”

Vidar cleared his throat and looked away. I was about to tell him he could leave if I was making him uncomfortable, when Odin entered the room. He was sweating and wild looking, his hair loose and his tunic torn. He seemed to fill the entire doorway. I’d never seen him look so breathtakingly sexy. His eye met mine and he lost some of his feral look.

“Is there reason vhy Tima remains chained?” Kirill pushed past Odin, to pull me into a fierce hug and then glare at the other men.

“
I wanted to make sure she was alright first,” Trevor bent over and pulled the ring out of the floor with a swift movement. My eyes widened. I knew he was strong but holy hunk of werewolf, Batman! I was dating Superwolf!

Odin muttered a few words under his breath and the locks opened. Manacles and chain fell to the stone floor in a loud clatter. “No need to be so dramatic, Wolf Prince,” he rolled his eye.

“Okay, you need to teach me that,” I poked a finger at Odin. “For the next time some madman… or madwoman abducts me and chains me up.”

“
There’s not going to be a next time,” Trevor put an arm around my waist.

“
Da, no next time,” Kirill frowned at me now.

“
Just get me out of here,” I shook my head at the idiocy of gods and wolves.

Trevor escorted me through a home which looked like a tornado had run through it. Furniture was smashed, chatchkis broken, and there were black burn marks on the walls. What the hell had gone on?

I digested all the destruction until we reached a tracing room, then curled myself in against Trevor carefully. He spoke the words to take us back to Valaskjάlf and I closed my eyes tight as reality shifted to let us through. I was a little surprised he hadn’t taken us directly home and I raised an eyebrow at him while we stepped out into the dining hall.

“
You need to finish your business here, so I can take you home for good,” he said with a finality that he was about to find out wasn’t going to be so final.

“
You know it won’t be for good,” I stared hard at him. “Why didn’t you tell me Sabine had a son with Odin?”

“
I wasn’t even sure you
were
Sabine,” Trevor’s jaw clenched. “It wasn’t till I saw you with Vidar that I was convinced.”

“
So you know she’ll be visiting us more often,” Vidar came into the hall with Odin on his heels. Odin wisely kept his mouth shut.

“
We’ll discuss it,” Trevor took my hand and started leading me to the bedroom I was staying in.

“
Okay, caveman,” I pulled on Trevor’s hand till he stopped and looked at me. “Why don’t you just toss me over your shoulder while you’re at it?”

Trevor raised a brow and smiled a little. I was about to protest what was obviously coming but he was too quick, all those werewolf reflexes. He had me up and over his shoulder before anything but a squeak could come out of my mouth.

“Trevor,” I pounded on his back as he carried me upstairs. “Very funny, now put me down.”

“
Me caveman,” he thumped my backside and I heard some choked laughter from behind us.

I lifted my head and saw Odin, Vidar, and Kirill coming up the steps behind us. “Thanks a lot, you guys are my heroes.”

“He’s
your
boyfriend,” Vidar shrugged. “You handle him.”

“
Thank you, Son.” I stuck my tongue out at him and he laughed louder.

“
Me take woman,” Trevor continued on his role. “Me protect, me strong, woman weak.”

“
You’re about to find out how weak this woman is,” I reached down and pinched his butt. He slapped mine.

“
Stop woman,” he slapped me again. “Me caveman.” He entered the room and tossed me on the bed. “Stay,” he pointed at me.

“
You’re gonna to get it,” I launched myself at him and he caught me easily.

“
You told me I was a caveman, Rouva,” He lifted me up and kissed me soundly. “I was only following orders.”

“
Uh-huh,” I smirked. “How’s this for an order? Put me down.”

“
Yes, Rouva,” he smiled as he put me on my feet.

“
How did you guys figure out it was Balder?” I sat down on the couch and was instantly surrounded by my men. My men… I looked around at them and felt possessive, they
were
mine and I had no intention of giving any of them up.

Uh-oh.

“Trevor tracked you. Balder also happened to be the only one missing,” Odin’s face became a hard mask. “I can’t believe my son betrayed me.”

“
Well this son didn’t,” Vali strode through the door. “We searched Breidablik from top to bottom, Father. Balder’s hidden evidence of his treachery well. We didn’t find anything to indicate what he’s been up to. Nanna and Forseti have fled as well.”

“
What he’s been up to is organizing a revolt,” I sighed. “He hates you for leaving his mother and has it in his head to take your place. I thought you said the divorce was amicable?”

“
It was,” Odin frowned. “Frigg loved someone else, Sabine was just a reason for me to finally leave her.”

“
Balder says she was miserable. That you cheated on her and then told her you didn't love her.”

“
Frigg is a goddess of love,” Odin ran a hand through his hair. “She doesn’t stay miserable for long. She’s had numerous lovers since we split.”

“
Yet your son still holds a grudge. Did no one sit down and explain to little Balder that sometimes Mommy and Daddy just can’t get along?”

“
Balder was over a century old when we split,” Odin shook his head. “I had no idea he was so bitter about it.”

“
I always knew he was a prick,” Vali fell back into the couch with heavy drop. Everyone turned to look at him with various degrees of disbelief. “Well I did. The pompous ass, always strutting around like he’s the hottest god in the universe. The only reason he married Nanna was that she fed into his ego. The Shining One my ass, the Shitty One is more like it.”

Trevor started laughing and it was contagious, everyone else started laughing… everyone but Odin.

“I’m sorry, Odin,” I reached out and took his hand. “His was the worst betrayal, there’s nothing funny about it. I think he’s let his anger drive him a little crazy. He even seemed to be jealous of Vidar,” I looked at Vidar and smiled gently, “something about him being special to you.”

“
All my sons are special,” He patted the knees of his boys on either side of him. “You both know I love you equally, right?”

“
Yes, Father,” they both said but Vali looked away.

“
Vali?” Odin turned to him. “Have I made you feel unloved as well?”

“
No,” Vali swallowed hard. “I know you love us all. It’s just that after you lost Sabine, you did seem to favor Vidar. He looks so much like she did. I think you did it unconsciously. He became one more memorial to her.”

“
Vali,” Odin sighed deep. “Forgive me. I wallowed in my misery and neglected the family that still lived. Grief should never be more important than love, than life.”

“
I understand,” Vali smiled and it gentled his rough face. “It’s already forgotten, especially since I’ve had so much fun chasing after Balder today.”

“
And you've got your mother back too,” I added with a small smile. He beamed at me.

“
What the fuck?” Trevor said so eloquently.

“
I wondered if you would remember him,” Odin smiled and then looked to Trevor. “Sabine raised Vali. She thought of him as her own son and he called her Mother. They were practically inseparable for the first year of our marriage. It was a fight to even get him to sleep in his own bed.”