Obsession (Ink & Iron #1) (4 page)

“Ah…Cole…please…”

She was soaking wet, her clit throbbing in time with his tongue on her nipple. She tried to pull his head closer, but he grabbed her hands in one of his and held them tight enough to hurt. Just a little. Just enough. She felt his command as thoroughly as she ever had. And she loved it.

She was already panting and on the edge of coming when he let go of her hands and went down on his knees, tearing at her panties. The lace let go with a ripping sound, but she didn’t care. She needed him to touch her there. He pulled again at the fabric, but it held. He moved in with his teeth, nipping at her flesh, and in moments the shredded fabric fell to the floor. His hand went back to her hip as he dove in.

For several endless moments he did nothing more than kiss her, so delicately she thought she might scream. Then his hot tongue darted out against her hard clit and the first shock of orgasm skittered over her skin, swarmed deep into her belly, her sex.

He paused and she heard his sharp, panting breath.

“Ask for it, baby,” he told her.

“Please, Cole. Don’t tease. Just make me come.”

“Ah, that’s my girl.”

He moved in and sucked her clit into his mouth, sucked hard and fast, and she was coming so damn hard she was crying out, her hips arching. She was still coming when he pushed two fingers inside her aching pussy, and stars flashed in her head, pleasure like the heat of a thousand tiny, burning suns, her body on fire. Burning for
him
.

“Again,” he ordered, his fingers burrowing deeper, harder, his mouth going back to work, sucking, licking, even his teeth grating the tip of her clit. In moments she was coming again, pleasure stabbing into her, her pussy throbbing, her legs so weak she would have fallen had he not held her up with one strong hand on her hip, while the other thrust inside her.

“Ah, God!”

She came so hard she was shaking, was still shaking even as the climax leveled off.

Cole pulled his fingers from her and slid up her body, still using his own to press her tight against the door, making the wood dig into her back. Didn’t matter. All she knew was his now-naked body against hers, his thick, lovely cock pressing against her stomach, then slipping between her thighs as he lifted her.

“So beautiful, baby, the way you come. Every damn thing about you.”

He kissed her neck as he wrapped his hands under her ass and pulled her higher. Her legs went around his waist.

“I need to be inside you. Oh, yeah…” The tip of his cock slid in her juices and he growled, “Fuck. Janie. Tell me you have condoms.”

“Bedroom,” she told him—it was all she could manage to say with her climax still shuddering through her, her body opening for him.

He carried her through the apartment and threw her down on the bed. “Where? Get them.”

She rolled over to open the drawer of her nightstand, fumbled in there until she found the box. When she turned back to him, he took the small foil pouch from her and tore it open with his teeth. Watching as he rolled it down onto his hard cock made her swallow in anticipation.

“Cole. I need to touch you.”

“Shh. Not now.” He pushed her onto her back and used his knees to kick her thighs apart. Sliding his hands under her ass, he lifted her hips. “Look at me, baby girl.”

She couldn’t have looked anywhere else. His gaze was on hers, like pale blue fire as he slipped the tip inside her.

“Oh…”

Desire was a blazing heat as he held himself there for one long moment. His gaze still locked on hers, he sank into her.

Filled by his heavy flesh… God, she’d forgotten how good it felt. How good
he
felt.

There were no more words between them as he began a hard, punishing pace. She leaned up to lick his salty neck. He bent to bite into her shoulder. His hips ground into her and pleasure lanced like a sweet-edged knife. They held onto each other, pleasure seeking pleasure, flesh seeking flesh. And once more orgasm hovered at that keen, lovely edge. She held her breath, clinging to his muscled arms, her nails digging in. And waited for him.

“Janie girl,” he breathed, his lips next to her ear. He said it again, his voice pure gravel this time as he wrapped an arm around her waist, the other behind her head as he crushed her body to his. “Janie!”

He bucked into her, the sharp, hammering jabs and his own pleasure setting her off. Her climax blasted her with pleasure, her sex clenching his heavy, pulsing cock. Their hips crashed together, his mouth crushed hers, and they were all one body, one sensation—some primordial creature writhing and coming in a liquid rush.

After, they lay together, their bodies still joined, both of them gasping air into their lungs. His weight was a lovely pressure on top of her. It was some time before she realized her nails were still buried in his back.

Finally he lifted his head and looked at her, humor and something else, something deeper, gleaming in his eyes.

“Baby. We are
so
not going to make it to dinner.”

Chapter Four

They lay together on her bed for a long time, her head pillowed on his chest, silent other than the occasional quiet murmurs lovers often make to one another, then he rolled her over onto her side, spooning her, his arms around her body. He was hard again, the rigid length of his cock pressing against the small of her back. His hand slid over her stomach, found her clit and played with it.

“You are the sexiest woman I’ve ever known,” he whispered into her hair as desire shimmered through her system. “Do you see what you do to me? Your body. Your eyes. Your hair. The way we fit. It’s just…right.” He slipped his hand between her thighs and pressed a finger inside her slick heat.

“Mmm…” She arched into his hand, need spiraling once more.

He held her closer, his hard cock pressing between her thighs, and she automatically angled to let him in. “Oh, yeah. Your body likes me, baby girl. Always has. There wasn’t a time we were together that you didn’t get wet for me in an instant, and I love that about you.”

He slid his cock against her swollen, aching pussy lips—aching because she needed him again so badly. “You feel so good, babe,” she said, the old nickname escaping unheeded.

“Mmm, so do you, Janie girl. I love looking at you, laid out on the bed. I want to tie you up the way I used to, in your pretty silk scarves. Do you remember how much you loved that, baby?”

The idea caused a wave of need and a wave of panic to flood her in equal measures. That kind of trust simply wasn’t there yet.

“Cole, no. I…I can’t.”

He was quiet for several long moments, then he leaned over her shoulder and brushed a kiss across her cheek. “Okay, baby. Whatever you want. Just know how much I want you.
Feel
how much I want you.”

He arched his hips, and his cock pressed against her opening, making her moan, the panic dissolving in the pure heat of their bodies together.

“Ah, that’s so good. I need you, Cole. Come on.”

“That’s good, baby. Because I need to fuck you again, my beautiful girl. Get another condom.”

She grabbed a packet from the open nightstand drawer and started to open it, but he took it from her and she heard the foil tear. She laid her head down on the pillow and waited.

In a moment he had a hand under her inner thigh, lifting her leg, spreading her for him, his solid body like a wall of muscle behind her. She felt his cock against her opening. She waited.

“Breathe with me, Janie,” he said, and she knew exactly what he meant.

She took in a breath, listening for the rhythm of his breathing and matching hers to his as she exhaled. They did it again, then a few more times, sinking into their breathing, into each other.

“Now,” he told her.

She arched back, and he slid home, his big cock opening her up, filling her completely.

“Oh…”

They moved together, breathed together as one—sinuously twining flesh, his hands on her breasts, then teasing her hard clit before sliding up to tug at her nipples. She reached behind her to grasp his hard, muscular thigh, her fingers digging in when he thrust deeper. But still they moved slowly, every motion a sort of meditation, creating connection as they always had. The world faded until it was just the two of them writhing on the bed, the silver moonlight shining through the sheer curtains, and the scents of come and lemon blossoms in the air.

“Come on, baby. I’m taking you to the edge now.”

He pressed onto her clit, rubbing it, tugging, pinching a little, and pleasure rose, inexorably taking her to that ragged, needy edge.

“Ah, Cole…”

“Now, baby?”

“Yes. Now.”

“Wait there for me.”

“Yes,” she gasped, understanding that she could never be with him without something in her giving herself over.

He thrust, his cock going so hard and deep she swore she felt him against her womb. He was big enough to hurt her, but she welcomed it, wanted it. She arched her back to take him deeper. And still he played with her clit, keeping her hovering at the edge of climax.

“Hold on, Janie girl,” he told her through clenched teeth. “Wait for me, baby.”

He slammed his hips into her, making her cry out in pain and inexorable pleasure.

“Wait,” he said again, his voice pure gravel. “Wait, love…”

He plunged into her, over and over, his hand on her clit and his thick, stabbing cock sending small shocks through her, tiny orgasms that weren’t quite orgasms. But oh, she needed to come.

“Janie, wait. For. Me.” One more hard, burrowing thrust, then, “Now! Come for me, baby girl. Come! Coming…ah…”

Pleasure knifed through her, deep and hard and true, his pulsing cock driving her on, her body wracked with a fierce, trembling heat as he sank his teeth into her shoulder.

Cole’s hand kept working her clit, until she thought she couldn’t come anymore, and yet she did, the pleasure exquisite, nearly painful. Finally they were squirming against each other as he softened inside her, his hand feathering over her clitoris and sending tiny shockwaves through her.

She was giddy. With coming. With him.

Cole.

How was this possible, after all they’d been through? After all these years?

They still fit together, hand in glove, as if their bodies had never forgotten each other, programmed by muscle memory. Knowing each other by heart.

He slipped out of her and turned her over, taking a moment to pull the condom off before he dragged her on top of him. She rested her cheek on his chest, over the koi he had tattooed there, and listened to the pounding of his heart.

Hers was hammering just as hard. From the sex, the exertion, the orgasm. The emotion she was barely able to hold at bay.

She would not think about the mixed feelings she still had about him. The unresolved shit between them. No, right now, she would enjoy what was happening—being with him again. His body and his scent and the man she had once loved with every part of her being, body and soul. And maybe still did.

It had always been Cole.

Didn’t something like this deserve a little time to see if it still might be? Because nothing that felt this good could be all bad.

Could it?

Two nights later they sat naked on her bed, eating Vietnamese pho noodles—or was it three? The time had passed as if they were in a dream. Being with Janie again—
his
Janie—was his dream. She had never looked more beautiful to him, her hair disheveled, her mouth swollen with kissing, her cheeks pink.

“I can’t believe you got them to deliver,” she said, lifting her chopsticks and winding them expertly around a long noodle.

“There are a few advantages to success,” he said. “Midnight noodles with you naked in bed being one of them. Eating naked suits you, baby.”

She smiled, and it lit him up inside.

“I have my painting that Iris did, you know,” he told her. “The one that matches this one over your bed? It’s hanging over the mantle in my living room.”

“You kept it?”

“Yeah, of course. You know I love her work. And it’s like…keeping a piece of you with me.”

She ducked her head, her lashes lowered, and he set his bowl down on the teak tray they’d brought in from the kitchen and reached out to grasp her small, warm fingers in his. “Hey. We need to be able to talk about our history. We don’t have to get into the hard stuff yet, unless you want to. I’m leaving that up to you. Because if that’s what you want, well…you deserve to have that choice in my book. But we’ve shared a lot of good times too. We don’t have to pretend it never happened, good or bad. Okay?”

She nodded, looked up at him, and he thought he saw a slight sheen of tears in her lovely sea-green eyes. She blinked hard a few times.

“Okay.”

He’d been sure she was going to say more. Janie had never been the type to hold her feelings in. It made his stomach knot up. Made him crave more of a reaction.

“This is another one of those good times, baby,” he said, maybe to reassure himself even more than her. “How amazing is this?
This
. Us being here together.”

Her green eyes were enormous, and he could see the doubt ricocheting through her brain and all he wanted to do was wipe it away.

“Can we just…” she stammered. “I mean, I thought we could do this without… God, I don’t know what I thought. Maybe I wasn’t thinking at all.”

He leaned in until he caught a whiff of her scent. She smelled like the lemon blossoms growing outside her apartment—that and the unique perfume of her skin and sex and
them
all over her. He couldn’t help himself—he inhaled, breathing her in, trying to calm himself down so he could tell her everything that was on his mind, in his heart. “This is
us
, Janie girl. There is no easy way. No doing this without thinking. But I don’t want it to be easy. I want it to be us again.”

“Please, you don’t—”

He couldn’t let her finish. “I meant to take this a little more slowly, but you’re right here in front of me, too fucking beautiful to be believed and more confident, stronger than ever. Still the most amazing woman I’ve ever known and I don’t want to waste any more time.” His fingers tightened around hers and his heart hammered in his chest. “Life really is too short and we are too damn important. Give me the chance to show you how important.”

She shook her head. “Cole… I don’t know. Do you really think that’s smart?”

“The hell with smart. People don’t care about each other because it’s the smart thing to do. We just
do
, because the alternative is unacceptable.” There was a fire raging in his chest. Love was raging. “Because we need each other.”

She was wavering, and he said a silent prayer that she wouldn’t kick him out of bed and out of her life again.

“I…I may need to take it a little more slowly. It takes time to build trust.”

He had to respect that. It made sense. Of course it did. He pulled in a breath, forced himself to calm. “We’ll take it however you need to, Janie. But know that I’m right there. Exactly where I’ve wanted to be for seven years. I just needed to make sure I had my shit together enough, you know?”

She took in a deep breath, blew it out and picked up his hand and kissed his fingertips. “Okay,” she said, as if she’d made some sort of decision. “Okay, babe. Let’s…let all that go for now and enjoy our noodles.”

He kissed her cheek and she smiled at him, making his heart pound.

Damn, what this girl did to him.

“Change of subject?” she asked him.

“Sure. Absolutely.” Not really. He wanted her packed and on her way to the house he’d gotten with her in mind. He twined his fingers in the ends of her hair for a moment, trying to convince himself that going at her pace really was okay. And it was—intellectually. But emotionally? He was just going to have to suck it up and deal with it. “Why don’t you tell me about your business? The place is successful, obviously, from what I saw of it. When did you open it?”

She smiled. “It’s been almost a year, which is hard to believe—it still feels brand new to me. But it’s doing really well. The location is good.”

“Yeah. Malibu? For yoga? You almost couldn’t have picked a better spot. The rent on that place must be steep.”

Her cheeks pinked. “Well, I invested what I got in the divorce settlement.”

“Yeah, about that… I know you refused alimony before because you knew I was struggling, but that’s all changed. Once I got sober and was able to write good music and perform again, things really took off for the band, which you’ve probably heard. I have the resources now. If you need money for the business—”

“Absolutely not.”

“Okay. Just offering.” He shrugged, but he felt a little hurt. Which was ridiculous. Obviously she was a good businesswoman. Why should she need his help?

She hadn’t needed him at all.

“The studio is doing great.
I’m
doing great.” She bit her lip, watching him closely for a long moment. “But…thank you for offering. I’m good, Cole.”

“Yeah, you are,” he said, making her smile. He speared a piece of pork with his chopsticks, fed it to her. “So tell me what’s going on with your family. How is Iris?”

She chewed for a moment, swallowed. “She’s good. Great, really. She and her partner Amy have been together for about four years now, and they adopted a baby girl a few months ago. Lola is a little doll—I love being an aunt even more than I imagined I would. I’ve been up to Portland to see her twice already. And Iris is still painting, and she’s doing some work in clay now too.”

“Wow, a new generation. Your parents must be thrilled.”

“They are. I think they were despairing of ever being grandparents.”

They’d talked about it when they were young, back in the days before he’d lost himself in drugs and booze. Having kids. Making a family. But he’d blown that all to hell, hadn’t he? Still, maybe there was time now. Maybe. He had to grind his jaw tight not to push too hard.

Cole took a sip of his iced chai tea. “So…everyone’s healthy and happy?”

Janie nodded as she sipped some of the rich pho broth. “How are your dad and Alison doing?”

“They’re fine. Went out to Pasadena to see them at Christmas with Chase.”

“You still don’t talk to your dad much?”

“Not much, no. That hasn’t changed. Dad’ll never forgive me for dragging my little brother into the music industry.”

“You hardly dragged him. From what you’ve told me—and from what he says himself—he was practically born with that guitar implanted in his hands.”

“You and I know that, but my dad will never see anything other than how he wants to see it. I went out there after I got clean and tried to make my amends. He didn’t really say much, though. I know it hurt him, in his own way, anyway, for me to lose my shit so publicly. I tried to make things right. A few times. He didn’t want to talk about it, so I never got very far with him. My sponsor has tried to help me get some closure on that myself because sometimes you have to let it go. I had to realize that I don’t have any control over other people. But my dad… He’s more comfortable when he has someone to blame, I guess. Someone other than my mom, who actually might deserve it.” He paused. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to get morose.”