Odd Melody (Odd Series Book 2) (25 page)

When he put it like that, I felt no more responsible than an errant six-year-old whose parents had to clean up the mess that he made in a grocery aisle. I pushed at him. “That does not make it okay.”

He nuzzled at me. “But, for some reason, you don’t want me to distract you from this?”

“No.” I grumbled my answer into his storm scented skin. “Why would I?”

He nibbled at my chin. “Well, I don’t know. It would be easier not to think about it overmuch. If we can fix it, why worry?”

Because I had done something awful. Because I had no self-control and could not manage my temper. Because I realized that Vance and I would not work. I pulled Chance closer and squeezed my eyes shut.

He slid his body to spoon mine. We fit as easily as if we had lain like this a hundred times before.

“Go to sleep, Janie.” He kissed my head. “It will seem better in the morning.”

“How do you know?”

“Because everything always does.” I could almost hear the smile in his voice.

I glared at the wall. “Well, that is a dumb answer.”

He laughed.

But I was tired. I should have shown more backbone against the godlike creature who claimed me, soothed me, and pissed me off more often than not. But he snuggled warm and comforting at my back. I slept, aware that sunrise would fix nothing. I would still be a monster when morning came. I just wouldn’t be a tired one.

CHAPTER Fourteen

The evening of my engagement party, night fell as it does each and every evening except I had to dress up. I’d sent my kid off to play with a gaggle of witches for the night. We piled into Mia’s car, instead of mine, since it held more people and more heat and headed to my engagement party. Even though time had passed, I continued to feel raw and jagged.

I wore a grimace and a pair of black slacks and matching silk blouse. I had borrowed a simple silver necklace from Mia. To coordinate with my hair, she had loaned me a chain with a silver wrapped piece of some dark purple, sparkling stone, cut square and simple. I liked it despite the occasion and fingered it nervously. I had on minimal makeup to downplay my looks, but Mia had insisted I not cover the siren mark at my neck. She claimed Kermit clashed with silk. Although I agreed, it felt a bit like going out to feed a shark with a bleeding finger.

Mia drove, but kept glancing my way. She looked lovely. She had fashioned her curls in an elegant array and her maroon outfit seemed more fitting than my funeral attire. Mia sparkled. She had not downplayed anything, but then again, she never did.

Wedged in the back, like paranormal sardines, sat Sven, Vance, and Avery. Vance and I had not spoken since the night at Peaches. I could not think of a thing I wanted to say to him, and I figured he and Julia had probably sorted things out. If not that night, then last night. I pretended not to notice that he wore a suit that cut the breadth of his shoulders and accented the lean line of his hips. I openly ignored his frothy white shirt that I wanted to touch to see if it felt as soft as it looked. I even resisted the urge to run my fingers through that silken hair which flowed like night across that white in such elegant contrast.

I was sure he didn’t notice me at all. He certainly didn’t say anything. His jaw clenched the one time I glanced at him. He probably hoped I wouldn’t say anything while he braced himself for some sort of emotional outburst from Crazy Janie, psycho-killer.

He would have to wait. I radiated control. No problem. I wouldn’t even feed anymore. I had not fed since Peaches. Not that I had told anyone that. I had decided to swear off my siren side, for the good of mankind. I did not feel well, not at all.

Sven cut a debonair figure himself. Dressed in a white shirt and zebra print blazer, proof that leopards were not the only animals from the Savanna mocked for the sake of fashion, he stood out even in our group. His stark black tie and the general restraint of his outfit amazed me. There wasn’t a bit of pink. Or a single sequin. He hardly resembled himself. Of course, his shoes were alligator. They did not go with the theme of the coat, but who was I to judge?

So off we went to my engagement party. Squashed between the male witch and the vampire in the back sat my tiny fiancé in a tiny black tux over a tiny black shirt. Of course, not trusting my taste, Mom had sent over clothes. We both wore all black. I felt pretty matchy, but my mother had sent over the clothes and it was her show. Avery appeared tinier than usual, seated between the giant and the bloodsucker. Almost like a kid without his car seat. Then again, black is slimming…maybe mom should have sent red, because Avery was not a man anyone wanted to have shrink by ten pounds. You could lose the little guy altogether.

Frank the muse followed us in Vance’s PT Cruiser. Frank had reappeared as we walked out the door. Mia had been thrilled. I have to admit to a less enthusiastic reaction. He did not make my top ten list of favorite people in Ashtabula County. But, as I was not feeling up to arguing, or much of anything other than walking, I glared, but kept mum. Frank had dressed in a black tux with a purple cummerbund. He looked like part of a wedding party, not an attendee at an engagement party. I wondered aloud how he could possibly be of any help to Mia, but she waved me off with a glittering hand and, as I said, I didn’t feel up to a lengthy debate.

When we pulled up to the Winery, the sea of cars amazed me, and I wondered what else the place had going. The well plowed lot seemed like winter had moved on. The valet stared at us as if we drove a clown car when we all piled out. Apparently, no one had informed him of my status as “princess.”

I let Avery take my arm and tried not to feel like an idiot as he led me into the main conference room, which mom had listed on the invitation as the ‘ballroom.’ Once there, the crowd shifted en masse to stare at us.

White roses, ivy, and Christmas lights swamped the room with pseudo elegance. Candles burned at each table and vases of white roses sat everywhere. Mother had dressed her court in every color of the rainbow. Only our party wore black, which explained the outfits. She had only the ‘royals’ in black. A distinction designed to ensure instant recognition. She loved to plan stuff like that. I should have thought of it and worn something else to be uncooperative.

My chin came up automatically. I blinked in the lights. They glittered, glowing with unattainable energy. I hadn’t eaten in forty plus hours. Everything glittered. I had waited too long. Things had passed blurry hours before. The moment struck me as an odd milestone. I had never starved the hunger so long and hadn’t known I could. Perhaps I could develop a tolerance to it. I could never have withstood it this long in the beginning.

I walked without stumbling. My skin ached, but did not burn. I had not gone blind. The room blurred further. Perhaps, I could get past it, control it somehow.

I held on to Avery’s arm. Mother made some announcements, and Avery said something. Honestly, I don’t remember much of what went on or what anyone said. I can’t say as I would have cared anyway. I felt the smooth silk of Avery’s jacket under my fingers. I toyed with the sharp edges of Mia’s necklace. Mostly, I ignored Chance as he tried again to get in my head.

I had sensed him all day. He hovered on the edges of my mind. A whisper, a yell, a taunt…depending on the moment he demanded and cajoled me to let him in. But I’d kept him out. He knew what I intended, but couldn’t stop me. I wouldn’t let him close enough. I shut down the walls and closed him out as tightly as I could. I hid in a tiny room, and he could whisper through the door, but he couldn’t get to me.

Once we arrived at the party, though, his presence changed from mental to physical. Somewhere, outside the walls of the winery, he called to me like a warm breeze. Still, I kept him out.

Suddenly, I realized I had lost time. Mia stood at my side with a worried expression. “Are you okay?”

I nodded. “Why?”

She glanced around at the crowd, stepping closer to me. “Every time you speak, people swarm you.”

“What do you mean?” As the silvery question slipped from my lips, five goblins stepped closer to me. They literally stopped their conversation and turned to me. Behind me, a fairy male and an elf edged close enough to nearly touch me. A troll dropped his drink and reached for me as well. I blinked. Further away, Frank stood amused as always. Never a good sign.

“Are you doing something with your voice?” Mia touched my arm, her face creased in lines of concern. “Janie? When you speak? Are you doing something on purpose?”

Her voice sounded a long way off because of all of the spinning colors. I turned and saw people dancing. Vance swayed on the dance floor, a spot of darkness in all that color. He beckoned me. I smiled. I suddenly didn’t care about our issues. Absorbing the music, I walked toward him. The band must have taken a break because “Going Under” played over the winery speakers.

I wished I could hold him. I gazed into Vance’s true blue eyes and longed to touch that night black hair. I was afraid to speak. I had no idea why people came to my voice. I wondered if he knew. I was afraid to ask out loud though and make more people come to me. Chance would know. I could ask him without speaking out loud, but if I let him in, I wasn’t sure I could shove him back out…or if I would have the strength to want to shut him out.

I let the music flow over me. Our gazes locked and the music spoke for us.
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you and you still won't hear me…I'm going under
.

I had bled for him and wanted to do it again. I wanted everything the way it had been—simple. I wanted to lean on him and know things would be okay. I wanted to be in a world where safety existed in his arms.

The music played on and I swayed. His hand slid around my waist. Better yet, I would save myself as I had last week. I had saved the day, even if I had done it by enslaving myself as a monster. Maybe I would wake up next to him in a world where he could walk in the sun, and I could forget to sing and eat the world…

With his touch, I shivered. Maybe he did not see me as a monster. Maybe we could get past everything including Julia. He had said he loved me.
Maybe
. Such a lovely word. I slid into his embrace and into those lovely eyes. My hands slipped around his neck.

He pulled our bodies closer. I rocked with him on the dance floor. Unlike our “Moondance,” this dance beat slower. Two predators stalking. No one existed but us. It felt like dirty dancing, the way we moved, our bodies fitted to one another’s. I breathed him in, and he snuggled me closer so I could inhale the scent of his skin as he ran his lips and teeth teasingly over mine.

I'm going under. I'm drowning in you. I'm falling in you.

I slid my hand into his hair, and he tilted my head and took my lips. My breath sighed out. When his lips took mine, I tasted the storm. His curls wound between my fingers, and I clutched them desperately. I had to hold on because if I didn’t, I would be carried off on a wave of my own feelings. Power shimmered across his skin when he removed us from the dance floor. I didn’t care to where.

He pushed me roughly against a counter in the darkened room. Somehow, the music came with us. With him, that kind of thing didn’t surprise me anymore.

He pushed me harder against the counter, and shifted me upward. I whimpered his name. “Chance.”

“How did you know it was me?”

I rested my forehead on his, my breathing ragged. “I don’t feel good.” The world spun but in an I-am-going-to-be-sick way.

“You haven’t fed.” His voice was a whisper brushing across my dry, heated flesh.

“I am not going to.” But even as I answered I chewed on his lip thoughtfully.

“You kept me out all day.”

It hadn’t been a question, so I didn’t answer him. Instead, I went limp. I had grown too tired to do much more. On the upside, I lacked the strength to attack as well. I had become too weak for much of anything.

Chance supported me. He and the counter held me up. I had gone mostly limp. Even my arms hung like dead weights. Lethargy weighed me down. I longed to give in, to close my eyes and submit to the cool darkness of nothing.

He scooped me off the counter, carried me to a couch, and lay down with me on top of him. “Drop the shields. I can look like him again if it will make you feel better.”

I smirked. “You still don’t smell like him.”

“Bet he thought you were fooled.”

I frowned but had no energy for more than that.
Had
Vance thought I couldn’t tell the difference? I had been fooled, at first. At least I had wanted to be, whether I really had believed or not. I suddenly realized that everyone at the party had an entirely different view on the circumstances than what Chance and I had. But, since I would die soon, it did not matter. I settled more comfortably onto Chance and closed my eyes to sleep, unsure if I would wake.

“Janie.” Chance’s voice barked through the closing fog. “Wake up and drop your shields.”

“Hmm.” I closed my eyes more firmly. The burning hardly hurt anymore.

“Janie.” His voice sounded stern, officer like. “Seriously.”

It was a command. I smiled. He had told Vance he could take care of me. I wondered if it raked on his ego that he couldn’t.

“Okay, new tactic.” He tilted my head and caught my mouth beneath his solid sexy lips. I kissed back, sucking in the lovely dream I drifted into. Then he bit my bottom lip hard. I snapped my eyes open and glared at him.

“You can’t.” His voice was a whisper, and his eyes had gone devilish.

“What?” Chance would not leave me alone and I only wanted to go to sleep.

His hands fumbled at the buttons on my shirt. Before I could stop him, we lay skin to skin from the waist up. He felt warm to my tired body, and I sighed at the pleasant feel of it.

His hands, on my back, felt hot and alive.

Like a cat, I curled closer.