On a Snowy Christmas Night (13 page)

“Condoms,” he said. “They’re in my wallet.”

It took a few seconds for his words to sink in. She felt instant shame. Protection wasn’t something she would typically forget about. Although in her defense, she’d never been in a situation even close to this before. She’d had sex with exactly two different men and each time there’d been a mile of warning.

He found what he was looking for and dropped the jeans unceremoniously on the floor. It made her laugh. Even the thrill of watching him walk back to her fully aroused wasn’t enough to curtail the nervous giggling.

“Trying to give me a complex?” He crouched next to her and straightened the sleeping bag and blanket around her bottom, startling her when he squeezed her left buttock. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.”

“Fine, but I’m sending you my therapy bill.”

Shea sighed. “I’m nervous, okay?”

“Why?” He sat beside her, facing the opposite direction, his bare thigh flush with hers. “Why do I make you nervous?” he asked, in a low soothing murmur as he cupped her face in his hand.

She met his warm gaze. “It’s not you, it’s me.”

He kissed the tip of her nose, brushed her lips with his, moved his hand to her breast. “What can I do to make it better?”

“I think you’re already doing it,” she said in a breathless rush, arching slightly and pushing herself into his palm.

He was a big man with big hands yet he handled her with the utmost care as he lightly kneaded, swirling a thumb around her tight nipple.

“You look dark and dangerous with all that beard stubble,” she said, unexpectedly shivering as she placed her hand on his thigh.

“Ah.” His mouth lifted with amusement. “You’re one of those girls who likes a bad boy.”

She gave an earnest shake of her head. “I like you, Jesse,” she said and watched the humor fade from his face. Silence stretched for a long uncomfortable moment and her chest tightened with uncertainty. Had she said something wrong?

He tore open the packet he’d gotten from his wallet, and donned the condom with a swift practiced motion. Then he took her arms and pulled them around his neck and kissed her, his tongue probing and determined until her misgiving vanished.

Unclenching her thighs, she parted them for him. He knelt between her legs, lifted the right one to his lips and kissed the inside of her ankle. Then moved to her calf, trailing hot kisses and warm moist breath all the way to the sensitive skin of her inner thigh.

Shea didn’t think it was possible she could climax without him touching her more intimately, but she wouldn’t rule it out, either. A mass of odd sensations pricked her feverish flesh. Longing burned deep inside her chest, so deep it was a place she hadn’t known existed.

The frightened part of her wanted him to stop, the newly awakened feminine part of her wanted the moment to last forever. It wouldn’t, though.

She felt the tension in his body as he moved over her and braced his hands on either side of her shoulders, felt the tremor in his arms as he held himself in check. Maybe it was contagious because Shea herself tensed. For her, it was anticipating the invasion of her body. It had been a long time for her, many months before Brian had finally moved out. And the experience hadn’t been particularly pleasant.

But this wasn’t Brian. This was Jesse—kind, sweet and hot-as-hell Jesse—who was making her feel things she hadn’t known were possible. There was nothing indifferent about the way she wanted him right now.

He murmured a soft reassurance and then guided himself to her opening. Pausing, he used his fingers first, sliding them in to find her slick and ready. Lowering his head, he kissed her trembling lips, the kiss so full of passion that it took a second for her to realize he was pushing into her body. Slowly at first, deep, harder, then deeper until she quivered helplessly beneath him.

He withdrew, though not all the way, and when she whimpered in protest, he moaned and thrust so deep she cried out his name.

13

J
ESSE
’
S
ENTIRE
BODY
was trembling with the need for release. He normally had better self-control. This was messed up, acting like a horny seventeen-year-old. Dammit, he’d wanted this to be really special for her, but he fit too well. He knew she wasn’t a liar, otherwise he might’ve suspected she was a virgin after all. She was that tight.

Only one thing to do. Withdraw. Even if it killed him. Which it just might.

He eased back, slowly sliding out of her, and then she made that soft helpless whimpering sound that tore at his heart. The kind of weak mewing that made him want to cut off his right arm rather than refuse her anything.

Against his better judgment, he pushed himself back inside and her wet, slick muscles clutched his cock, testing every last shred of his restraint. At this rate he wouldn’t be able to hold off another minute.

He braced his hand on the side of her head and arched back to look at her flushed face. The shadowy light wasn’t helping. He wanted to see the smoky gray-blue of her eyes, the rosy shade of her aroused nipples. Wanted to taste them again.

Shea’s exasperation came out in a cute growl, and then she locked her legs around his ass and lifted her hips. Her unexpected forcefulness reignited the fire in his veins.

The hell with it. He had a second condom. Next time...later he’d make it better for her. He rocked against her, slowly, letting her get used to him again, then he unlocked her legs, pushed them farther apart and thrust in deeper, harder, faster, until he was completely inside her. She started to squirm, caught his arm and dug into his flesh with her short nails.

He couldn’t take any more. Couldn’t hold off...

Jesse barely moved but came so violently he let out a cry that echoed in the small shack. Tremors racked his entire body and he felt so weak he didn’t think his arms could hold him up. Afraid he’d crush her, he fell to the side, managing to hook an arm around her and take her with him.

Letting out a whoosh, she lay sprawled on top of him. “You’re on the bare floor,” she said, wiggling in an effort to break free.

“I don’t care.” His voice was a breathless rasp. “Stay with me.”

“But, Jesse—”

“Shh.” He pushed her hair back but it fell forward again, getting caught in his stubble-roughened jaw.

She shook it out of her eyes, and he tucked the loose tendrils behind her ear. Sighing, she quit fidgeting and lay there on top of him, her belly pressed close, her small, firm breasts hitting him right below his rib cage. She wasn’t very tall, while he was six-two, and if she weighed more than a hundred and ten pounds he’d be shocked.

Without moving her bottom half, she stacked her palms on his chest, rested her chin on the back of her hands and stared at him.

“You okay?’ he asked, unable to keep from touching her cheek.

At the slow heartfelt smile that curved her lips, a sense of bone-deep satisfaction filled his chest. “Wow.”

He grinned and wondered if she could feel his ego expand through his pores. “Not disappointed?”

“Um, that was...” She moistened her lips. “Wow. That’s all I can think of.”

“All right.” He ran his hand down her back, skimmed his palm over her nice round ass. Not too slim there. Perfect. “Now you’re making fun of me.”

“I am not.” She turned her face, and like a contented kitten, rubbed her cheek against his chest hair. “You’ve changed my mind. I finally understand the big deal about sex.”

“No, you don’t,” he said. “Not yet.”

Her head came up, her eyes confused. “But I even—” She bit her lip, her gaze briefly flickering away.

“Because you came once?”

“Well, yes...” She stared at him now. Apparently he’d sparked her interest. “It was all pretty amazing.”

His cock stirred, which was also pretty amazing. “If I’d lasted longer you could’ve had another orgasm.”

She seemed skeptical, or maybe he was misreading her expression because the light sucked. Or maybe the frank talk was making her uncomfortable.

“I was worked up but I swear I won’t be so quick on the draw next time. That’s all I’m saying.” He threaded his fingers through her hair, cupped her nape, holding her still while he lifted his head to kiss her.

She didn’t seem nearly as willing as he’d hoped. Her mouth softened briefly but then she pulled back. “I don’t understand why you’re qualifying what happened. It was wonderful. More than I ever—” Her shoulders moved in a tiny shrug. “It was the first time for me.”

Jesus, he really wanted to slam a fist into that Brian guy. Selfish bastard. Jesse snorted. He’d been a little bit of a pig himself. But he’d make it up to her. While he’d let silence lapse something registered.

Was Shea really as naive as he was beginning to think? He replayed their earlier conversation. She’d lived a fairly sheltered life. He couldn’t ignore the possibility that she didn’t understand there was more than one kind of orgasm.

“I only have one condom left,” he said, more regretful than she’d ever guess. “But we can be creative until we get back to the Sundance.”

Her eyes widened slightly and a smiled tugged at her lips. “Tonight? We get to do it again?”

Jesse laughed and hugged her tighter. “Oh, yeah, we’re gonna do it again.”

* * *

“W
OW
.” S
HEA
LET
her head drop back on Jesse’s bunched jacket. Beneath her the blanket and sleeping bag were twisted together in a tangled heap.

Jesse flopped onto his back next to her, panting as if he’d run a marathon. The woman was going to kill him. He was too old to go this many rounds. For the past four hours they’d either been making love, resting from making love or about to make love. And yet he’d managed to hold off using the second condom. Damn, she was a quick study.

“Come here.” She’d rolled to her side and was smoothing out the blanket.

“Hell, no. I’m keeping my distance. You’re gonna give me a heart attack and we can’t even call 911.”

She giggled. “I didn’t mean I wanted to do anything, I need the rest, too. I only wanted to share the blanket with you.”

The wooden planks were cold and rough under his back, and he could see their breath in the chilly air. “I have to go throw another log on the fire.”

“I’ll do it.” She jumped up before he could object.

The slight sway of her naked hips as she approached the log pile made him glad he hadn’t hastily gotten up to help her. Instead, he clasped his hands behind his head and enjoyed the view.

She glanced back at him. “You could be straightening out the sleeping bag.”

“I could.”

“You’re making me self-conscious.”

Jesse chuckled. After what they’d been doing? “Seriously?”

Groaning, she gave her hair a toss and then opened the stove door and carefully arranged a log. “We’re getting low on wood.”

“Good thing we’ve been using body heat.” His view temporarily obstructed, he rose to a crouch and shook out their makeshift mattress.

Then he stayed still, listening to what was happening outside. The wind hadn’t picked up again, so that was good. Last he’d looked the snow had subsided, as well.

“I should check on Candy Cane,” Shea said, on her way toward the door.

“Let me.” He was on his feet, his arm around her waist pulling her naked body to his before she could protest.

“We have to stop this,” she murmured against his mouth, then parted her lips for his tongue, looping her arms around his neck.

He kissed her soundly while filling his hands with her soft round ass. “You mind checking the lantern while I look outside?”

“Of course not. If nothing else, we have a lot of fuel. Probably wasn’t a good idea to leave that much around but I’m glad for the light.”

“Me, too.” Before he released her, his gaze dropped to her flushed nipples. They seemed to get rosier the more aroused she became. He dipped his head for a taste.

She shivered in his arms. “You said we were giving it a rest.”

“We are.” He rolled his tongue over one stiff peak. “This is nothing,” he murmured before sucking it into his mouth.

“You’re crazy,” she whispered, arching closer.

He couldn’t disagree. Something about her inexperience and eager curiosity turned him on like no other woman ever had. Not just that, but the smell and taste of her, the candid questions and unguarded responses to his touch, made him throb with a longing that he refused to examine too closely.

Sex had never altered the way he thought about a woman afterward. Maybe in high school, when he was sixteen and thinking with his dick too much... In one year he could’ve sworn he’d fallen in love twice. Which wasn’t implying that love had anything to do with Shea and him. But he couldn’t deny being with her felt different.

All she had to do was say wow, which she’d said ungodly often, and he’d start getting hard all over again. Jesus. What was up with that?

He switched to her other breast and flicked his tongue over her extended nipple. Her answering moan almost had him rethinking the whole let’s-give-it-a-rest thing, but he saw the mark his stubbled chin had left on her shoulder. He indulged in a final roll of his tongue over the tight nub then kissed the small whisker burn.

Dammit, he’d tried to be so careful.

She blinked drowsily at him. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Get under the blanket. I’ll be right back.” He rubbed her firm backside, then quickly let her go before his good intentions evaporated.

He’d have to give it up and use the condom soon. That was the problem. He’d already come twice, but only once inside her. And damn but he wanted to see the wonder in her face when she climaxed with him buried deep in her tight, wet sex.

Hell, he had to put on the brakes, remember that they had all night. Or the rescue team would end up finding them in a coma. He was pretty sure Shea wouldn’t appreciate making headlines in the
Salina Gazette.

Letting in some cold was inevitable, but he opened the door as little as possible and the mare looked up at him with mild interest. She was a Safe Haven rescue. In all likelihood the poor animal had been through a lot worse than waiting out a storm under the eaves of a line shack. “You doing okay, girl?”

She snorted steam then turned at the noise that came from a clump of snow sliding off the branch of a spruce.

It was dark but the sky was no longer blotted out by eerie purplish-gray clouds swollen with snow. Overhead he could see the soft glow of the quarter moon struggling to shine through. Good sign. Dawn wouldn’t come for another seven hours. By then he expected the weather would be clear and the terrain negotiable. If not for their dwindling log supply and lack of condoms, he’d have mixed feeling about being able to leave.

“Jesse?” She sounded anxious.

He closed the door. “Yeah, sweetheart?” He turned to her but stopped in his tracks. He wasn’t the type to use endearments, certainly not unconsciously. Clearing his throat, he joined her on the sleeping bag. “Nothing’s wrong. I was just looking at the sky.”

She yawned and quickly covered her mouth. “Good news, I hope.”

“Looks clear. I think the storm is over.” He stretched out beside her and brought her to his chest.

She pressed her cheek against his skin. “You’re cold.”

“Ah, sorry.”

“No, stay where you are.” She clutched his shoulder. Her palm was warm from the fire and she rubbed it up and down his arm, pausing to mold her hand to the curve of his biceps. “I like touching you,” she whispered. “I want to feel every square inch of your body.”

“Um, think you’ve already done that.”

She laughed softly. “Oh, my. I believe you’re right.”

Jesse smiled and kissed her hair. She was so damn cute. “Did I miss anything on you?”

“Not even a freckle.” She sighed, her breath warm and soothing on his chest. “I’m sore in very weird places. I’m not complaining, though.” She snuggled closer. “It’s just odd.”

The way she spouted whatever was on her mind made him realize how much time he’d spent trying to decode other women. Shea still confused him, but it wasn’t by acting coy or pretending to be someone she wasn’t. “Another reason we need to cool it for a while.”

She lifted her head and frowned at him. “How long?”

“Damn.” He couldn’t help laughing. “You’re gonna kill me, woman.”

Her mouth twisted in a wry smile. “I didn’t mean it like that,” she muttered shyly, then settled down again. “We should do some talking.”

He hated the sound of that. “Sleep is what we need.”

She nodded absently, lightly running her palm over his chest, waking his nipples. “I sort of feel sorry for Brian.”

“Your ex-boyfriend?”

“Mmm-hmm.”

Just what he wanted to do, talk about her ex. “Why?”

“He doesn’t get it. He has no idea what he’s missing out on. Maybe Serena can teach him a few tricks like you taught me. She’s his new girlfriend.”

Jesse tried not to laugh, but his body vibrated from the restraint, and she reared back to stare at him. “I have nothing to say to that,” he muttered.

She sniffed. “I mean, how is a person supposed to know if someone doesn’t show them?”

“Very good question,” he said as seriously as he could, and coaxed her to lay her head down again.

“It’s a valid point.”

“I’m not arguing with you.”

She sighed. “Can I tell you a secret?”

“Shoot.”

“Everyone thinks I love my job just because I’m so good at it. And I do like the work. I love computers. It’s very black-and-white. No judgment calls required. But I hate that everyone assumed that was the path I’d take. No one asked what I wanted to do. Not even my parents.” She went very still. “Not even me, come to think of it.”

“You just went with the flow.”

“That’s exactly what I did because I didn’t know anything else.” Her voice had dropped off as if the thought saddened her.

“That’s not a bad thing being able to do what you like.” He wasn’t keen on following the conversation in the direction it was headed. His new crossroad wasn’t up for discussion.

“I understand, I’m lucky in that respect. Because I despise change. Well, not so much anymore, I’m making progress. Only baby steps, but hey, I’m here. I didn’t let my mom badger me into spending Christmas with her new family.”