On the Rocks (A Turtle Island Novel) (26 page)

C
HAPTER
T
WENTY
-T
HREE

C
arter’s phone rang for the tenth time that day, and for the tenth time he ignored it. He
still
didn’t want to speak to anyone. Not his mother, his sister, his father, his lawyer, nor Lisa.

He might be willing to talk to Ginger, but she hadn’t called.

Not that he’d expected her to. She was probably busy dating the wrong guys.

He put his finger to the X key of his laptop and pressed down, filling his screen with Xs. He kept thinking about being back on Turtle Island. He’d missed the anniversary party last night, and he felt bad about it. He’d actually been looking forward to it. And he would miss Julie’s OB appointment tomorrow. They planned to do another ultrasound. He would have gotten to see his niece.

And
. . . he missed Ginger.

That wasn’t supposed to happen. But it did. There was even a little part of him that wished he’d stayed just for her. Had she really been suggesting they could be more? He’d been replaying that last morning with her in his head. Right before they’d made love.

She’d said that he could believe in a happily ever after, too. She’d suggested he stay.

We’re . . . good, too. Aren’t we? There’s no need to rush off. We could—

We could . . .
what
?

He’d interrupted, letting her know that she was wrong. Such a thing didn’t exist for him. And he’d accepted that he’d probably never know exactly what she’d been intending to say. Because he’d left, and now he was back here. Stewing.

He typed more Xs, and the doorbell sounded. He ignored it. But when the chime pealed once more, he grudgingly pushed himself out of his desk chair. He was tired of sitting anyway. He’d get rid of whoever was at the door, then go out to find something to eat. He hadn’t been in the mood to cook since he’d gotten home, and there was no real food in the house. But then, he hadn’t been in the mood to eat, either. Yet suddenly, he found himself ravenous.

Only, the moment he descended the stairs and reached his front door, his appetite disappeared. Lisa stood there. A baby in her arms.

“Your sister told me you were here.” She spoke the minute he cracked open the door.

The words renewed his anger. “You talked to Julie?”

“You wouldn’t answer your phone.”

“Then I hope she told you to go to hell.” He moved to close the door in her face, but she braced an arm against it.

“Actually,” she began, “she suggested I come here.”

Carter stared at his ex-wife. Other than hiding a second marriage and a baby, she’d never been one to lie to his face. Clearly he would need to have a chat with his sister. Seemed she was walking in their mother’s footsteps and trying to “fix” him.

“Looks like you made it,” he said emotionlessly. “You’re here. Now you can leave.”

He pushed the door to close it again, unconcerned with how much of an ass he was being.
She shouldn’t have come. But she played the baby card. She twisted her body so that if he slammed the door, he’d hit the baby first.

At his pause, she slid past him and into his foyer. She was in his house.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m not leaving until we talk.”

“Nothing to talk about. You can’t have my house.” He folded his arms over his chest and stared down his nose at her.

“That’s not what I’m here about.”

“Then what?”

She sighed and looked around. He saw curiosity flare in her eyes as her gaze landed on the family room. She’d never been in the house, but he’d e-mailed her plenty of pictures as it was being built.

“Can we,” she began, “get out of the doorway, maybe? Can we sit?”

“No.”

“Okay, fine.” She frowned. Then she hoisted the baby to her shoulder, and he noticed that there was spit-up on her collar. He couldn’t remember ever seeing Lisa in any way but completely put together. “I’m here to apologize,” she told him. “I’m sorry, Carter. About that day at the apartment. I’m sorry that you had to find out that way.”

“You’re not sorry for marrying someone else?” He finally looked at the baby. It was a girl. “That you had a
baby
with someone else?”

“I’m sorry for all of it. Except . . .” She glanced at the baby. “I’m also not sorry.”

“Get out of my house, Lisa. We’re done.”

Her eyes pleaded with him. “You deserved better from me, okay? I know that.”

“I deserved your faithfulness. And your respect. I’m proud of my career. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished.”

She gave a quick nod. “You should be. It’s just . . . it’s not the life I envisioned.”

“And my wife marrying someone else isn’t the life that I envisioned.”

She fell silent, and they stared at each other, and he thought back to their college days. He’d cared for her once. A long time ago. Hadn’t he?

He’d thought she’d cared for him, too.

“Why?” he asked. He cursed himself for needing answers.

“Actually, I think we did it to each other.”

“Seriously?” The fire came back in an instant. “No dice, lawyer. This one is on you.”

“Carter, come on. You knew our marriage wasn’t good.” The baby whined in her arms, and Lisa patted her on the back. Carter ignored the child. “We didn’t see each other for months at a time,” she said. “We rarely had sex. And we were
okay
with that. For years.”

“We were working on our careers.”

“But we should have also been working on
us
.”

“This house was going to do that for us.” He spread his arms wide as if to encompass the entire structure of the home. “It was going to help us. Did you forget that? It’s why I built it.”

“But I never asked you to build it.
I
didn’t need a house.”

“I was building it for
us
!”

His raised voice made the baby cry, and Lisa sighed. Her shoulders sagged. “I needed a husband, Carter. One who wanted me and not some fanciful dream. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Not a house. A husband.”

“Well, you apparently need a house now.” He eyed the crying infant. “Or is that another sort of torture you want to dish out? Buy my house from me just so I can’t have it?”

“I want the house,” she said calmly. “That’s true. But I also don’t think you really want it. Not anymore.”

Lisa moved past him again, bouncing the baby until she calmed, and Carter ended up following the two of them. They stood in the formal dining room, which was barren of furniture, and Lisa motioned with her head to the picture window. “See that skyline?”

His house sat high enough above the city so that he had great views.

“You love the sand,” she said. “Hearing the waves. Breathing in the air. I’ve heard you say it, and I’ve seen your passion when you talk about the ocean. I love the city.”

He couldn’t figure out what she was even doing there, why they were having this argument, but his anger suddenly dissipated. He was so tired of being mad at her. Tired of fighting for . . . nothing. He didn’t even know what he’d hoped to gain over the last few months by being mad at the world. And he could see with clarity that he’d gained nothing.

“Let’s go into the family room,” he said.

They moved through the double-wide opening into the other room, and he offered her a seat. As she settled on the leather sofa, she snuggled the baby in the crook of her elbow, and Carter watched her offer a gentle smile to the child. She loved her daughter. That was clear. And he suddenly couldn’t see
them
having a kid together. They were just too different.

The truth was, he’d wanted his plans, his career, more than he’d ever wanted Lisa. How had that never occurred to him?

“You’re happy with him?” he asked.

“I am.”

“Are you legally married?”

“We are. I came clean the same day you found out.”

“And he loved you enough to stay?” Carter wouldn’t have stayed. In fact, it had never occurred to him to fight for her. He’d called his lawyer that same day, before he’d ever hailed a cab back to the airport.

“We had a few rough weeks,” Lisa confessed. “But yes, he loved me enough to stay.”

What a schmuck. “I hate you,” he told her.

She gave a sad smile. “I know.”

“I could have had you thrown in jail.”

“I know that, too.” She pulled a folded piece of paper from the baby bag she’d set at her feet. “It’s one of the reasons this offer is so generous.”

He eyed the paper in her hand. Then her. “I don’t need your money.”

“Maybe not, but you need something. And I hope you find it. I truly am sorry I had a hand in getting you to this point. I’ve gone over it many times, Carter, and if we go all the way back to our college days, I’m not sure we were ever right for each other from the beginning. And I think I knew that. I should have declined your offer of marriage.”

Her words finished him off. They stared at each other, neither knowing what to say next.

Then she slid the paper onto his coffee table. “I do want to buy this house. I want the life you imagined. I’m sorry to say that. I don’t mean to hurt you with it, but I see it now. I understand what you were after. And I want it. Only—”

“Only, you want it with someone else.”

“Yes.” She looked around the room, taking in the darker wood trim. The atmosphere that was more formal than the house Ginger had built. “And this house suits me. It was designed for me. I want to slow down. Have more kids. It’s not all about work for me anymore. I’ve changed.” She looked at the paper. “Think about it. If you decide this isn’t the place for you, please give me a call. Or have your lawyer call me. I won’t bother you again. But Carter, don’t live your life so unhappily because
we
messed up so terribly. You’re a great guy. Go find the right person. One who can appreciate all the things you bring to the table.”

He didn’t reply, and she walked out of the room, seeing herself out. At almost the instant the latch clicked in the other room, his phone once again began to ring.

Hope sprang from nowhere that it would be Ginger. He wanted to talk to her. He needed to talk to her. But when he pulled the phone from his pocket, he saw that it was his mother. He should have been there for them last night.

He answered the call. “I’m sorry, Mom.”

“Carter.” He could hear her voice shake. “Are you okay? I’ve been trying to reach you for days.”

“I wasn’t in the mood to talk. Lisa wants the house.”

“I know. Julie told me.”

“You tell Julie she’s in trouble with me. She sent Lisa here.”

“What? Lisa showed up there?”

“Just walked out the door.”

“What happened?”

He forced his jaw to unclench and his shoulders to relax. “We talked.”

And he’d needed that talk, he realized. Something had changed in him, and as it had happened when he’d been in Georgia, he felt like he could breathe again. He inhaled air deep into his lungs.

“Are you selling her the house?”

“All I’m doing for the next few weeks is writing.” He suddenly couldn’t get back to his keyboard fast enough. “I have a book due in three weeks.”

And
then
he’d think about Lisa and the house.

“What about Ginger?” his mother asked.

He stared at the phone. “What about her?” Had something happened?

“Julie thought there might have been something going on there. And I’ll admit, I could get behind a scenario like that. She’s a good girl.”

Carter hung his head. “My little sister needs to stay out of my business. Did she bother telling you about the father of her baby?”

Shame instantly filled him. That had been a low blow.

“Actually, she did. We had a long talk about it today. She messed up, and she knows it.”

“He hasn’t called her again, has he?” Carter would hunt the man down if he had.

“No. He hasn’t called. Legal documents arrived Friday. He’s out of her life for good.”

His heart thudded with relief. Thank goodness for small victories.

“Now about you and Ginger.”

“There’s nothing with me and Ginger, Mom. She’s a great person. And a good friend. But we were just having fun. Julie has it wrong.”

“Are you sure? She was over here last night, and . . .”

He held his breath. “And?”

“She was sad, Carter. She seemed hurt. She left the party early, and I couldn’t help but wonder if it had something to do with you. I thought maybe she was missing you.”

He’d certainly been missing her. “Probably not.”

He settled in the spot Lisa had vacated, and pictured her baby in her arms. He really had wanted that life. And he really hadn’t had a clue that he’d been going about it all wrong.

“Can I ask you something?” he said.

“Always.”

“How did you and Dad do it? All this time? You still love him, right?”

“Of course I still love your father. More than ever.”

“But how? Why does it work for you, and not for everyone else?”

“Oh, baby. I’m so sorry your marriage didn’t work out. But things happen. People grow apart.”

“She thinks we weren’t right for each other to begin with.” Her words had shocked him.